>>9459 4 retards drinking hahahahahhahaha. Cheers.

>>9459 Started editing pepes after ages. I am forcing myself to do fun things and not be productive. Well, fun things are fun. I missed this. Being an online troll is not fun in the online wars kind of way. I don't see a point in online wars. But making pepes is good wholesome fun. Sandeep Acharya does way more for the cause than any anonymous troll. He even puts his address in his YouTube songs. Wealth and status are traps that prevent action.

Muslim women when they reach 30.age terribly. The fats just sag everywhere and they lose all tone and definition. A classmate , who used to be a hottie looks like a rotting vegetable now.

I want a pc to plug into my telly. Seemless sports streaming and torrenting are the primary objectives. What should my config be? Cheapest but i dont want it lagged even slightly

>>9467 i3 12th gen plus or Ryzen 4500 series+ 8gb ram if you use Linux or debloated Windows. 16 if you use Windows. You need a decent network card, preferably a LAN cable. Why not Gen 11 or below ? Heating. Updates to fix security issues really impacted Intel processors. Why not RaPi or SBC's ? They do work but you need very solid cooling for Indian climate, or an AC room the very least. For the price of 8gb or 16gb model, you can easily get a netbook or NUC mini PC.

>>9467 Lag in the stream, or in general operation? For the latter it is important to use an operating system that is not bloated. I would worry more about DRM with the sports streaming. You don't want to spend money and then realise that the streaming service will only play 720p on your 4k tv because some software or hardware component does not meet their HDCP "standards". I tried running jiotv on bluestacks. It worked but my hardware was too old so it was impractical. I would buy some ~5-year old desktop with a Core processor 8gb ram minimum from OLX or used computer shop, and forget about it. Should be enough to run debloated windows, and I wouldn't give much thought to specification because it isn't my main machine. Maybe add an SSD. >>9468 Yes it would be best if you run an ethernet cable to your system. If not, 5GHz WiFi.

>>9470 The 720p is a good point. I tried premium hotstar in India. 4K content is rare. Mostly upscaled 720p. It makes no sense to invest in hi res when streaming is the means

>>9468 While at suggest me a laptop under 80k ( other than ideapad, tuff). Thinking Lenovo LOQ with ryzen 7 HS Is the 4050 any better than 3050 or waste?

>>9475 What is your use case ? Do you travel a lot or not ? What OS do you plan to use

This person has bought a phone on credit, and an employee of the creditor (credditor?) seems to have installed an app on the phone, and has given it administrator privileges. This gives it total control over the phone, which is very invasive indeed. (link below) He says that the app is an MDM (mobile device management) type app, like the one used by corporate entities to control their assets given to employees. He says the phone is "IMEI locked" and that the application runs on very low level and "starts up before the OS". Can't be sure, but this just seems like a poor regurgitation of a ChatGPT response. One of the reasons is that the application was installed by the employee, and didn't come from the manufacturer - which means it's a normal userspace application, and the earliest it can ever run is after you unlock the phone - because the user partition is encrypted until this happens. For the application to start before the OS, you would have to alter the /boot partition or the /system partition, both of which are impossible on a locked bootloader. At least, that's what I know. There could be nuances. I don't care about the moral or financial aspects about any of this. All I want to know is if this is actually possible, and the way it works. And if there is a way to remove this. First thing I would try is to get the phone into EDL mode if qualcomm, and then flash the stock ROM, which the bootloader should happily accept. This should remove the app in all probability. And then I would unlock the bootloader and custom ROM it, just to be sure. (presently, the creditor application supposedly prevents enabling developer options, asking for a PIN.) The gripe here is that Google could be enabling this. I don't know how exactly Google achieves this, but a factory reset if you manage to do it does not wipe off the Google account from the device - you have to log in, or the device stays unusable. This can easily be extended to locking devices on credit, if they wanted to. https://old.reddit.com/r/india/comments/1l4cmgv/bajaj_finserv_is_spying_on_your_phone_if_you_buy/ I just want to know more about this. Do you know of documentation where I can read more about this? Here are the things I could find. https://www.androidpolice.com/2020/11/09/google-has-an-app-to-lock-you-out-of-your-financed-phone-if-you-stop-paying-for-it/ https://developer.android.com/reference/android/app/admin/DeviceAdminService (The link above says this is the API that is used by the Google application for credit things.)

This person has bought a phone on credit, and an employee of the creditor (credditor?) seems to have installed an app on the phone, and has given it administrator privileges. This gives it total control over the phone, which is very invasive indeed. (link below) He says that the app is an MDM (mobile device management) type app, like the one used by corporate entities to control their assets given to employees. He says the phone is "IMEI locked" and that the application runs on very low level and "starts up before the OS". Can't be sure, but this just seems like a poor regurgitation of a ChatGPT response. One of the reasons is that the application was installed by the employee, and didn't come from the manufacturer - which means it's a normal userspace application, and the earliest it can ever run is after you unlock the phone - because the user partition is encrypted until this happens. For the application to start before the OS, you would have to alter the /boot partition or the /system partition, both of which are impossible on a locked bootloader. At least, that's what I know. There could be nuances. I don't care about the moral or financial aspects about any of this. All I want to know is if this is actually possible, and the way it works. And if there is a way to remove this. First thing I would try is to get the phone into EDL mode if qualcomm, and then flash the stock ROM, which the bootloader should happily accept. This should remove the app in all probability. And then I would unlock the bootloader and custom ROM it, just to be sure. (presently, the creditor application supposedly prevents enabling developer options, asking for a PIN.) The gripe here is that Google could be enabling this. I don't know how exactly Google achieves this, but a factory reset if you manage to do it does not wipe off the Google account from the device - you have to log in, or the device stays unusable. This can easily be extended to locking devices on credit, if they wanted to. https://old.reddit.com/r/india/comments/1l4cmgv/bajaj_finserv_is_spying_on_your_phone_if_you_buy/ I just want to know more about this. Do you know of documentation where I can read more about this? Here are the things I could find. https://www.androidpolice.com/2020/11/09/google-has-an-app-to-lock-you-out-of-your-financed-phone-if-you-stop-paying-for-it/ https://developer.android.com/reference/android/app/admin/DeviceAdminService (The link above says this is the API that is used by the Google application for credit things.)

>>9483 I just remembered that the EDL mode only flashes the bootloader and does not flash the entire OS. So what I said about it doesn't stand, and this makes the system quite foolproof.

Did a 3 day 2 night trek. Distance was just under 20 kms, but LOTS OF ASCENT AND DESCENT and technical tricky terrain. Extremely tiring but also extremely refreshing. European big cities are all the same. Different language, same touristy bullshit. Sitting at job all day, the idea of more idleness does not appeal to me. > Picrel Garyl Titanium. Best investment I ever made. Clean water anywhere.

>>9483 Can confirm this. I got a phone on loan early on, it had similar app built in that was reading all my dad down the deepest system settings. This seems like an evolved version of it. https://www.bajajfinserv.in/how-to-root-android Strangely enough I found this ! Going through documentation, what I understood is , the service needs to ping Bajaj/admin regularly, otherwise it will either disable or lock down the device depending on how it is configured. It has been a long while since I fucked around with android, but rooting without IMIE code is possible ? Once bootloader is unlocked, hard reset and new rom should fix this imo. But I am n not familiar with newer versions of android.

>>9488 Just to clarify, the phone I got was on contract i.e. EMI i.e. Loan. They don't use the loan word here, people mainly get it on contract for 2 years and then change it. Buying a phone is considered more expensive and I fell for this tactic. They made their money in other ways. Serving me ads on phone non stop, which then they would claim I clicked and my bill would increase. I used to appeal and in time I would get my bill back. I could and eventually did break my contract, but it was signed for 3 years minimum. I lost significant money this way. The Indian one is just siphoning data it seems.

Anons, I know that I'm retarded but since I am a home dwelling autist and I will never feel the warm touchof a woman and I'm not really interested in committed relationships, I just wish that I could summon a succubus for a one-night stand. I know that I'm a retard but I did do some research on /x/ and it says that they are interested in long term relationships and shit like that. I'm a fucking autist and I really want a one-night stand with a succ. Such is life.

>>9486 >It has been a long while since I fucked around with android, but rooting without IMIE code is possible I don't think you ever needed the IMEI to unlock the bootloader. Are you confusing it with the bootloader unlock code? You still need this for most phones. Some manufacturers refuse to give it to you at all. >Once bootloader is unlocked, hard reset and new rom should fix this imo. But I am n not familiar with newer versions of android. To unlock the bootloader, even if you do know the bootloader unlock code, you need to toggle a switch in the settings menu. It's super easy to prevent the user from doing this if an app runs with admin permissions. There is probably something built into the Android OS to make this easier for the app. This is useful for endpoint management for corporate entities. There is a similar switch for factory reset. - FRP, Factory Reset Prevention (or Protection, I think.). If you do not enable it from the settings menu, the recovery will refuse to reset the phone. In short, the recovery always checks the values of respective flags and refuses to unlock the bootloader or reset the phone if the flags aren't set. this means if an app could get admin privileges before you can get root access to your phone, you have run out of legitimate ways to take back control of your device. It even disables developer options, btw so no adb. You can hope that the app was developed by a bunch of mouthbreathers in a sweatshop, and inject bad data from somewhere, maybe they forgot to check for authenticity of data received, try to impersonate the bajaj domain using a custom routing table and a computer on your local network and tell it to do something. But the fact remains that the hardware isn't going to listen to you, and that feeling is really frustrating. (I used to "own" a chinky phone which showed me ads and a bunch of other shady things, but Huawei refused to give me the bootloader unlock code, which is why I know the feel.) >>9489 >They don't use the loan word here, people mainly get it on contract for 2 years and then change it. Buying a phone is considered more expensive and I fell for this tactic Maybe it's cheaper for people who do change phones every 2 years? >serving ads There should be legislation against this. If there is a way to show you ads, no matter how obscure, they use it.

>>9493 https://www.sleepfoundation.org/dreams/lucid-dreams you're best bet. Or just go visit a prosti. >succ interested in long-term-relationships <I like to pay full price for a rental car

>>9495 >you're best bet. Will try anon, will try... >Or just go visit a prosti. Yeah bro, would have done it but, I have no money for that since I am a broke nigger and well, I don't know whether a prosti will do demon roleplay with horns and everything and be a qt3.14 tomboy with short hair. >succ interested in long-term-relationships <I like to pay full price for a rental car Kek, this is fucking hilarious. Will try lucid dreaming instead.

>>9494 I think I meant IMIE lock code, but yeah the bootloader unlock code is different. I get what you are saying. You don't own the device if the company controls the codes. Well, that is what paying EMI's is. I switched to a Fairphone a while back, due to these frustrations. IT is far from a perfect phone, but I own the hardware and software and I can do with it as I please. Have already replaced the USB C and made mods to the cover and other things, > Maybe it's cheaper for people who do change phones every 2 years? It is for iphone users or Flagship phones.For anything else, wasted. > There should be legislation against this. If there is a way to show you ads, no matter how obscure, they use it. There is a sinister side to this. Ad cookies spy on you very effectively and companies and governments use that data. My own theory is GOI does this too. Not common citizens but the special cases for sure.

>>9459 Chill with the drinking guys, it’ll mess up your looks fast.

>>9504 Very true. My gen of girls have aged like milk because of binge drinking.

All the news articles of murders of husbands (and those of wives/gfs too) are very disturbing. Relations between men and women should be between them. Involving state, involving cultural institutes and trends etc instead of directly talking to each other and solving it between them is stupid.

>>9504 >>9505 I'm going to age like shit too, but only because of worry and lack of sleep. Need to find a way out of the wage cage, or at least, find my way to a better wage cage. >>9510 No! Everything that happens in the country must be dictated by the government!

>>9516 >>9505 >>9504 Balance hydration and drinking. Expect the effects on sleep and keep quantities low. InCh days I was drunk posting a lot and drinking a fair bit. Now it is 0. I am older and capacity has gone down. But friend circle has changed a lot too. >>9516 You should take lack of enough sleep very seriously. Sleep and wake up same time daily and aim for 6 hours minimum. Speaking from experience, it will fuck you up worst than anything. Looking tired is the least of it.

>>9518 I get 6 hours usually. Only on some sleepless nights do i get less. Trust me it's not enough. You need 7 hours of *peaceful* sleep minimum. Optimally, 8. I don't drink. Apart from cultural reasons it's because i'm really bad with addictions. If something feels good, i'll keep doing it.

>>9519 I use a sleep tracking watch. It is not as accurate as a dedicated sensor, but good enough. My REM sleep changes daily. Without it, 8 hours is necessary. With it, even 5 is enough. I did have a teacher, who did Yoga nidra and was able to function well with 2 hours of sleep daily. But Yoga Nidra works only with heavy repetition.

I wish I could disappear and delink from my former digital self and, the constraints of my real and social self completely, like a ghost. I seek isolation from the outside world. I've sent and shared photos of my real self and my creations in the past and I can't quite delete my traces of existence from the world. I can't disappear completely, past spectres always linger behind my back. Someone must have saved my pictures, my creations and my way of talking, they must be on a hunt out for me. I've left every social media but still, browsing and lurking always leaves an abstract trace. Some proprietary technologies, I can't leave yet because I'm not a NEET. I can't leave completely quite yet, I can't still go off grid because of my own desire and social constraints imposed upon me. Just today I went to a restaurant, and I started sobbing because I didn't know how an order worked. I mean, I mostly cook at home so I don't go out for anything except some work and excercise, I don't like going out. It always feels so tiring. I don't like talking to people either, they all feel so, shallow to me. We have superficial interests in common but, nothing really deep. I know people, but I wouldn't call them friends, which makes me feel a little guilt because they do seem to notice me, especially when I'm down. I have enough contacts to not be completely forgotten, but not quite enough to be a normie. I don't truly connect with people, I don't feel love for anyone and I'm fine with it being like this. The only love, or should I say awe and fear belongs to my God that I worship, fearing that I'll be born again as a dog, or a pret or a sinful soul in Naraka. I know that I'm a massive socially awkward autist and that if I ever make a new persona online that I treat as a ghost, or a disembodied voice, I know that people will link such an avatar of myself to my previous dead ghosts, and they'll find me as a real person. I'm just a few bad days away from being an lolcow, my greatest fear is that a bunch of people from like, The Sharty and KiwiFarms will find me and hunt me down ruthlessly, because I am a massive autistic nigger. They'll have all the right to doxx me and troll, even send death threats to me, because I'm a retard who should have never touched the internet in the first place and who would be foolish enough to post his creation and opinions online. Any schizo yet serious advice, Anons? Don't say to me to normiefag and observe them, I hate normies and their norms. I want to be isolated and completely forgotten by normies, and to be invisible from fellow autists and trolls, because I know that trolls will eventually track me down. I hate the internet, I wish it went down forever

>>9530 Thank you for posting here, a proper schizo is what makes an imageboard an imageboard. >I've sent and shared photos of my real self and my creations in the past and I can't quite delete my traces of existence from the world. I can't disappear completely, past spectres always linger behind my back. Someone must have saved my pictures, my creations and my way of talking, they must be on a hunt out for me. Unless you a have specific people/person whom you suspect of being on a "hunt" for you, I don't think there is anyone out for you. There's no way to completely erase all your traces unless you go through the trouble of torching a bunch of datacenters. >restaurant You're paying for the service, so it's really ask for what you want. The issue starts with casual interaction. But if a simple situation like trying to order food causes you to sob, anon, you need help. Not reddit-tier therapist/psychiatrist help, but help nonetheless. >The Sharty and KiwiFarms will find me and hunt me down ruthlessly They torment people who are fun to torment. People like CWC who responded to the trolls every time. As far as I know, if a thread on the Farms is the only internet presence you have, they have a policy of removing you from your position as a lolcow, and removing your thread. Put simply, there are more interesting characters for them to milk, so they leave you alone. >because I am a massive autistic nigger Just like all of the sharty and all of the Farms. >Any schizo yet serious advice, Anons? You're asking me? kekek

>>9459 I have never met an IRL kpop fan. Do people really like kpop ?

>>9530 >>9530 There is lot of contradictory stuff here. I get the general idea of your post, but would you mind fleshing out these thoughts better ? Then one/some of us can give meaningless advice on this.

>>9531 There are so many terms in this that I had to google !

>>9459 https://scifiinterfaces.com/2013/07/24/the-secret-of-the-tera-keyboard/ Do you guys also obsess over chording, hotkey grouping and custom commands to speed up typing ?

>>9534 Really? I thought it was rather straightforward. Stop using Google btw. >>9536 I like setting up keyboard shortcuts for things I use the most frequently, but beyond that I don't really see much point in chording and shit. It just feels like diminishing returns. My typing speed is fast enough to not be a bottleneck, I have to stop typing to think. So typing even faster won't really lead to any increase in productivity. Maybe I should think faster? Keyboard shortcuts are good in that you don't have to take your eyes off the screen to do anything. I've come to like laptops because of this (in spite of all their flaws). You can use the touchpad with your thumbs, so you don't have to take your eyes off the screen or your hands off the keyboard, unlike when using a mouse.

>>9537 Exactly. For all my typing and reading speed, I can only think slower than 60 wpm. I use some keyboard shortcuts for some latex terms, esp in equations Or common markdown used text like - [ ] But nothing else. For an editor, I keep coming back to vi and terminal. Neovim and Lua, I haven't invested the time.

>>9530 >>9531 If you stop posting for few years, people really stop caring. Things happen to people and they pretend to forget. They will steal your stories and your style. I change online identities every few years. > Doxxing and shieeet Internet was different. I had a personal blog for a very long time. Then people started DDOSING it. Hosting company got tired and kicked me out. There were solutions , but I just got tired and closed it. Now the internet is just hostile and dangerous. Well, I got tired of staring at screens too. Made myself a better life for myself.

https://youtu.be/7OvW8Z7kiws Dedicated to all my anons here.

>>9459 The India question is back here again. Building back a network will be a bitch. I still have to wind tthings down here, as well as take care of some money. Coming 2 months will be incredibly hard. But monthly salary is a strong drug.

>>9459 >>9554 I grew up doing odd jobs for money. This meant my focus on academics was not as high as it could have been. I repaired PC's, sold coffee in an expensive cafe (remember Barista's, they don't exist in India anymore as far as I know) So I was never salary driven or dependent. I still sleep on a mattress on the floor. Can easily buy a bed, just feels like a waste. My desk is handmade and so is a lot of stuff I use. Most of my salary goes into keeping relatives afloat, ones without a job. I have enough savings for a year to live comfortably without a job. My last job was comfy af, but it was also ideologically opposed to me. My main boss , while she doesn't hate me, she is a micro manager. I am a very independent worker and a very independent person. So I skip company events and lunches. My work is always complete in advance , so she cannot complaint. I cannot put my finger on what went wrong. But a series of many small things. I am also overqualified. An academic expert in my field, doing Excel level work in corporate setting. I don't dress the corporate way either. MY co workers are attractive chads and stacies running marathons and taking 5000€ vacations. Some have 100,000+ Insta followers. In academia, everyone looks and feels like a cave troll (except the social sciences, I hate those lefty hags). There is a comfy feeling in that. At the very least, I am looking forward to a month of joblessness. If things don't my way, then more. Or even return to India. The issue with India option is > Apply via Naukri, leak my details to basically every useless HR faggot. > Apply to Indian companies, negotiate with gujjus for pennies as pay. > MNC means the same Linkedin cut copy paste fake culture of Hindi medium passouts pretending to be enthusiastic about playing golf. > Academia - Teach shit to Gen Alpha fags, so you can have 2 hours a week for research But the worst of all. < Visits from parents < Calls from relatives < Go on a walk, get hit by a random car/truck/scooty/bike I need to think about all this. I need to weight my options.

>>9555 >Or even return to India. Don't. There's no need to put yourself back into this giant rat race for pennies. You're one of the lucky ones. You might have heard things might have gotten better here, but not enough to attempt something like that. >Barista's They are cafes in the mid to upper price range here: Cafe Coffee Day, Lavazza, numerous "coffee houses" and more recently: Chaayos and Third Wave Coffee. Starbucks also has their outlets here nowadays. There have been a lot of brands and companies tending to the whims of the upper middle class and upper classes in the recent years in general.

>>9556 It's all bullshit. All these cafes are bullshit. A decent pour over or french press with good beans and you get 95% of the same taste as the most expensive machines out there. I have tried them all. > Rat race Yeah, I had the same impression when I checked out jobs. I fucking hate it. Employers pay peanuts and expect quality work. Why it makes me sad is because I know we need lot of quality in many important including mine. My interactions with Embassy always form my impressions, since the employees work in Germany, but they are still living in India mentally. And the experience with them asking for a bribe just disgusted me.

>>9557 The bribery and what not, from what I've heard, has not changed one bit. The only "relief" that the common populace has seen in terms of corruption and barely functioning bureaucracy is because of digitization of services (like banking, government ID creation, filing taxes), that is, removing the human from the equation entirely. Draconian laws for business and corrupt government officers that handle that sorf of thing have been kept firmly in place with not much change, only allowing the existing oligarchs to rise further. I've also heard that they've deliberately kept the online passport services from functioning properly so that you necessarily have to pass through a human to get your work done, though I don't have any confirmation on this. This is getting a bit too much into politics, I know.

The Axiom launch was exciting. I woke up late for it, but I am happy. May this be the first step of many. I know nations will sabotage our launches, as they have before. Accidents will happen and we have to be VERY VERY CAREFUL. All that aside, this is an achievement and should be celebrated

>>9566 Good to hear comments in Hinglish, which seems to be the national language now. Does it make sense to make a Hindi thread here and help fix my Hindi anons ?

>>9567 Hinglish in official/semi-official communication makes me wince like nothing else. I want to strangle the people in the marketing agencies which use hinglish in their marketing campaigns. To me, using Hinglish is something of an insult to the Devanagari script - Hinglish is hip, cool, modern, while good old Hindi written in Devanagari script is for unpadh gawar bimaru bihari construction workers. At least, that's what I see. Maybe irrational. >Does it make sense to make a Hindi thread here and help fix my Hindi anons ? The reason Hinglish is so prevalent is it's easy to type with a standard qwerty keyboard. It is difficult to type Devanagari with one, so I wonder if there is anyone who will invest the time required to learn typing Devanagari just to post in the thread.

Idk how I came to be here. But there is a lot in my life that I don't enjoy and none of it really chosen by me. But people, habits, work tasks etc creeped in. None of which align with me. And I now find myself dealing with things I never chose to. Pointless struggles. So I am pulling myself back (though I am growing my hair and beard instead of cutting them, normally I always keep short hair and clean shaved face). Now there is this urgent need to purge all these un necessary things and people I don't care for or enjoy.

>>9627 Our people have no pride in their languages. Just heard a group of Telugu students talking. Disgust and cringe washed over me.

>>9651 There is a lot I want to say but the laws of my residential nation prevent me. > it glows a little, and religious fanatics don't have anything Everything here is a response to happenings form boards and websites long since dead. More importantly, image boards are terrible places to discuss religion. There is no point discussing religion unless you really know the person well and it is done in good faith.

>>9668 >>9651 What do you find glowy here ?

>>9668 Debate and arguments over religions is futile and done to death. But if someone wants to discuss his own religion, someone wanting to talk about the epics of Hinduism for example, I'd say that's productive, even if there is not much of interest for me/ >>9669 The first thing you see when you load up the website is Hindutva-Nazi type thing, someone who is looking for reasons to get angry or kick up dirt doesn't even have to scroll down 3 lines to find it. Becomes very easy to convince people about how people here are Hindutva Nazis.

>>9675 Nazi'sim has nothing to do with Hindutva. > Hindutva wadi's We are. > Hindutvadi cliche of left wing presstitutes If only we were as based as they accuse us of being

>>9677 >Nazi'sim has nothing to do with Hindutva Lefties think two these are equal, no joke. I haven't read either ideology, so I don't know. But the point is that their prejudices are easily confirmed when they see this, and that's why the board glows.

>>9699 This board is the last bastion of free speech. Not stupid speech like Bhachan. That said, we should think about updating the CSS and banner.

Hulk hogan is dead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRtOTIykZNE Both these wrestlers are dead. My heroes are all dying one by one. I am profoundly sad right now.

>>9736 I've never been a pro-wrestling fan and I suspect I'm quite a bit younger than you, but I do sympathize. These deaths are starting to prepare me for the inevitability of seeing my childhood heroes die. Scary in a strange way. When someone close to me dies I feel sadness and I can move on and accept it. When a hero dies it's like my self belief has died, like you finally realize even heroes are flesh and blood, and you feel profoundly weak.

>>9738 >>9738 > I suspect I'm quite a bit younger than you Never assume anything on imageboards. Everyone lies. > I've never been a pro-wrestling fan I don't blame you, unless you get into the stories as a child, it doesn't make sense. The action is fake etc If you want to understand the appeal of wrestling, try this video. https://youtu.be/VYvMOf3hsGA > Your heroes I grew up in a time, when men solved problems by beating each other. Talking to each other was considered womanly and wrong. Ww did not have MMA. On the rare ocassion, we got a VHS of an old boxxing match. Hogan, Schwarzeneger , stallone etc were heroes for that reason. They presented the idea, that any problem could be solved by your brains and muscles. Hogans death is yet another reminder, that era is gone. Those ideals are gone too. Age has nothing to do with. Watch 1987 Predator and tell me that Arnold is not a badass.

> Maccha > Rocks > Admin of XYZ online group as a brag in social conversations > "I am an IIT'ian" > Name dropping your collage more than once in a conversation There is also the Delhite londa/londi types, but I have not met thsoe in a long time now.

>>9746 >maccha It's just a southie word that is vaguely similar to "bhai" right?

>>9748 Yes. Indicator of annoying people. Same applies to over use of Bhai in north India

Inch barely have any posters and this is one of the most active board on 8ch

>>9786 So ?

Tell me your opinion on ISKCON yaro. Is it me or something feels off about them?

>>9788 Theologically, replace Jesus with Krishna, add some people love bullshit and remove the Abrahmist aspects from bible, you get ISCON. It is a weapon used to convert whites. normally ex druggies , people lost etc. I don't think it is bad for them. ISCON for all its faults is an improvement for these people https://youtu.be/GL9xqygw_Gk The temples are independent, each temple decides how it implements the teachings. Many temples get creative with the implementation. Drugs Sex Molesting people Typical stuff. Spirituality is a tricky thing when it confronts the demands and desires of the real world. Lot of fakes.

>>9798 Well it's either ISKCON or seeking professional metal therapy Was checking my symptoms and some how I have both autistic as well as ADHD symptoms. The worse part is both have conflicting symptoms. So if my autistic brain want to detailed work, my adhd won't let me work in detail. If I have to chose mental therapy, how to go that route. I don't think I can share this stuff openly with someone but sometimes it's just pathetic that I can't even do the simplest of tasks I suppose to do.

>>9801 I am on the autistic spectrum too. Not too deep to be dysfunctional. I also have ADHD. I had therapy as a kid, my teachers were dumbfounded that I could do well in subjects and then lose it suddenly. Top 1 year and then barely pass the next. Psychological therapy was absolute fail for me. This was also long long ago, maybe doctors are better now. Gabor Mattes books helped me a lot in understand what my ADHD. Regarding autism, 1. I learnt the limits of social interaction I can tolerate 2. I learnt to fake basic social competence. Say what people need to hear and shut up about the rest 3. Find outlets for my autistic urges 4. Cultivate hobbies and habits that help these conditions Moving away from parents was essential for me. My parents like many others do not allow me to live how I want, control on food control on social habits forced socialisation etc etc etc I cannot say if ISCON will help. Like I said, it depends on each temple. But even then, for internal stuff they won't. As for doctors, their incentive is money. So they are not aligned in letting you become functional. But you can only depend on yourself for your problems.

>>9459 I recently had an interview with a company to work on an AI related topic. The money was insane. As a tedpilled individual, I am always amazed that people think tech will solve their issues and unfuck their lives. The roots of these issues are usually human and tech has never worked at solving these (and never will). Even if I say yes, I have to prepare a lot for this role. With money idk what I will do. I have most of what I need and that money will probably fund relatives who leech off of me. More importantly, the company just generates AI bullshit that will tax your hardware more with no real benefits and contribute to making another generation of people brain dead.

>>9459 I cannot help but think how my antisocial tendencies are hurting my career/moneymaking prospects.

>>9803 >Even if I say yes, I have to prepare a lot for this role if you aren't looking to retire i would take the job if i were you. if not you, someone else will help them with building whatever horrific thing they're bulding to harm civilization. might as well make some money off the fall of civilization.

>>9824 There is a cost depending on your field. Either you are so good that your results speak for you Or You need basic competence. Brilliant people suck at interviews (and I suck at them too). I tend to avoid overtly social companies that need you to have Linkedin and attend meetings a lot. This is another reason that things have not worked for me with Indian companies.

>>9825 It is complicated. But I know what you mean, there is another job that I am competing with some really brilliant people for, but this one too I said yes for. If nothing else, I can poison pill projects, which is far more common that people realise.

News 1 in morning - Family dog dead. I didn't know this dog but my parents loved it and it protected them. Hit by speeding car and died within minutes. Suspicion that the car was after my dead. News 2 in Afternoon - Cousins kid hit by car after coming out of school gate. Head burst open. Dead on the spot. My family is cursed or we have a serious enemy right now.

>>9865 Cannot imagine the grief. I have decided to never have a pet dog again because of things like this. And the grief of a kid dying is just too much to put into words. Terrible day indeed.

>>9866 Weird, I replied to this but reply not posted. Bad situation with police, naturally someone working in the force was involved in nephews death. With the dog my parents did not even try, but I have never seen my parents so sad I have had lot of dogs. I used, to change cities a lot. Physical bullying was common when I was a child. My grandfather taught me to feed dogs, especially younger ones in any new place and they would protect me. This worked like a charm. But I also saw so many of them die. What pisses me off is the pointlessness of these deaths. Some idiot wants to speed, therefore an innocent should die. In both cases, the cars were in places they were not supposed to be or allowed. I was already on the way to India to help family out. Emotionally I cannot help them and my autist presence is not helpful either. But I can help with the admin and financial stuff. Still my cousin told me to not to come. Him and his wife want to handle this alone.

I woke up exhausted today with all the stuff that is going on in my life. I had this feeling that coming month will be much worst. Part of me wants to shift back to India to take care of parents. Though I have a shitty relationship with them. Wife won't be happy. She is used to german way of dressing , public display of affection when she feels like it etc. Looking for jobs, all the decent ones online don't display any salary. My friends tell me to open a Linkedin account. But Linkedin is fucking cancer. I might as well then start posting boomer memes on Facebook and kill all hopes and dreams.

indiachan.gay

>>9872 Move back when you're retired or kids are settled

>>9877 There is a purge of Indians coming to the west. Ango countries first. Has already begun. Germany will be later, luckily hate towards Islam is higher in Germany than hate towards Indians.

>teen angst in my 20s screw me

>>9881 It never stops. I am also moody these days. I wonder if its planetary

>>9886 >>9881 Probably my judgements compromised but I am feeling angry angsty since 2-3 days. Got rejected for a project. A babu said that my work is great but I am too sanghi type I feel really pissed off. Running into walls again and again. AI job I said no. It simply won't make money and seems very boring.

Strange, random musings of mine. It's been a while since I visited this forum. All the others have gone to shit. Lainchan and Petrarchan have been completely invaded by 4channers and Sharty members who spam "tranny" in every single post and constantly post ragebait. I don't even need to describe what 8kun is like right now. I've been more social in real life, in meatspace. I'm a zoomerfag so, my experience would be a lot different from yours since, from what I can tell, the userbase here seems to lean older. I've been talking more often to real people. And while I am an autist, I'm not exactly a hikikomori or a complete schizo. However, I find their replies strange and empty and I feel that my conversations and mind are empty, too. I don't know what they constantly talk about and why are they always giggling and smiling. It's something that I can't understand. Often, I feel that I have nothing to say. So, I keep to myself and withdraw into my inner fantasies. It's something my mom taught me, that people always don't really have anything to talk about, so it's best to keep one's mouth shut. <It's nothing to think about Anon you're just a fag. To answer your question, I once asked someone else as to what they talk about. They replied, "People always talk about others, and what they've gotten into. Occasionally, they'll ponder if the other person has a crush or if they have fucked and drunk shit. It's all gossip." And, I felt shocked. "How is it that people can always find so much to talk about others?" That's something I never understood. I never understood the constant pleasure trips they take, the same webseries they all watch, all the Instagram stuff they use, the IPL matches or memes they all go crazy about or, the regular trips to the movie theatre they seem to enjoy. I never did. My parents did not bring me up like them. Sometimes, I feel terribly guilty for even speaking. I feel like I should once again, withdraw completely from social lives and personae and just focus on my work again. My interests are different from theirs but, they aren't meaningful, nerdy or niche enough. Popular on the internet, but rarely heard of in real life. I feel guilty. Sometimes, people ask me, "What do you do fun?" Then, I'll respond back to them by saying "I read experimental stuff, I like math and studies and I listen to weird music." I feel that the stuff I mentioned about is lame and performative because, I don't read that often. I don't have a work or study ethic. I can't create or play music. I'm not good at coding and I have always failed at math. It also feels deeply unfulfilling because, a part of my mind just wishes that I was more involved in religion and that I should abandon nearly everything I like and to just, chant Japa and talk about God. It's a good, fulfilling and *acceptable* topic to talk about, right? I feel guilty about talking, since I'm neither good at the stuff that I claim to be interested in nor do I like the stuff others do. I don't talk about sacred and godly stuff because I'm so engrossed in wordly affairs and, I hate the sheer mundanity of normiedom. The world feels so absurd and everything feels awkward or unacceptable to talk about. I feel like the things I enjoy are, more of an image I curate for myself and are not genuine, even though I like them. I also get too obsessive about mundane stuff that isn't related to God and I feel ashamed of it. I don't know what good people talk about that is perfectly right and beneficial. Yet, I hate talking to regular people... I'm not sure what I feel. I don't know what I feel. By the way, I still browse Reddit a lot without an account like a Normie. But, that's because the wiki posts there tend to be decent and it's sort of the last places where you can still browse a forum-like experience. Especially since the Tech Bro holy grail, StackOverFlow's userbase is horrifyingly passsive-agressive and, the entire website is behind CloudFlare anyways so it's automatically a no-go from me. It's shit but still, considering the fact that Forums for the most part have been completely gutted out, I still use it. It's mostly for tech troubleshooting or following motorsport/piracy discussion since Dread has nothing beyond drugs and tech. The site's gone to shit but, Old Reddit is still usable without Javascript and doesn't give me captchas. Not to mention that there's nothing on 4chan that isn't on Danbooru or Reddit so, there's that. The site quality has completely gone to the dogs though. I wish I could quit browsing Reddit, but there seems to be no real alternative I can find for now, Anons. Please suggest me an alternative since I mostly use it for motorsports and tech, nothing else. It's the last thing that keeps me tethered into normie trends and stuff, so I want to completely sever that connection too. Feel free to call me a fag for still using it but I want nothing but to quit it, I'm just struggling to find any other space to lurk and observe and well, troubleshoot. Any tips for finally kicking the bucket? Feel free to insult me for my message's length and my bad writing style. I know I should write shorter stuff. I am after all, an effete and androgynous Europhile who is too scared to get out of his house or do anything besides trying to make his CV look good. My mom sometimes feels disappointed that I don't have masculine qualities. I don't feel very comfortable like that and I don't feel comfortable telling her. She'd think that I'm gay, even though I'm not. That's it, really.

>>9902 What album cover is this ? > Often, I feel that I have nothing to say. So, I keep to myself and withdraw into my inner fantasies. It's something my mom taught me, that people always don't really have anything to talk about, so it's best to keep one's mouth shut. Your mom taught you well. Simply means you are have grown beyond your social circle. < "People always talk about others, and what they've gotten into. Occasionally, they'll ponder if the other person has a crush or if they have fucked and drunk shit. It's all gossip." Dumb people talk people, smart people talk ideas. > That's something I never understood. I never understood the constant pleasure trips they take, the same webseries they all watch, all the Instagram stuff they use, the IPL matches or memes they all go crazy about or, the regular trips to the movie theatre they seem to enjoy. I never did. My parents did not bring me up like them. If your soul feels distressed, then you need not suffer through it. This is optional after all. In your workplace it might be different in the future. > "What do you do fun?" Then, I'll respond back to them by saying "I read experimental stuff, I like math and studies and I listen to weird music." They don't care about answer, they don't want to know you (most of them anyway). Keep a general meaningless normie answer. > I feel that the stuff I mentioned about is lame and performative because, I don't read that often. I don't have a work or study ethic. I can't create or play music. I'm not good at coding and I have always failed at math. Imposter syndrome is normal anon. All you can do is work towards it. Talk is cheap. Action is not. And action though requires more effort than talking, it feels more fulfilling too. < a part of my mind just wishes that I was more involved in religion You cannot force it. Simple as that. Visit temples. Read texts. Listen to satsangs. Find what makes sense to you and why. Then go deeper into that idea. Talking about religion and spirituality is hard. These things are tough to express without sounding like a druggie hippie. > I hate the sheer mundanity of normiedom. That is the pain of your soul, screaming for you to strive towards something better. > The world feels so absurd and everything feels awkward or unacceptable to talk about. I feel like the things I enjoy are, more of an image I curate for myself and are not genuine, even though I like them. I also get too obsessive about mundane stuff that isn't related to God and I feel ashamed of it. Why do you think about how the world will see you ? What is the reason ? > I don't know what good people talk about that is perfectly right and beneficial. Nothing. The only meaningful conversations are ones you have with yourself. < There is nothing outside of yourself that can ever enable you to get better, stronger, richer, quicker, or smarter. Everything is within. Everything exists. Seek nothing outside of yourself. > By the way, I still browse Reddit Hackernews is better. I have not used it in a while sadly. > I don't have masculine qualities. Picrel is Krishna. He is not jacked with 6 packs etc. Men of different kinds, each of them have their strengths and uses in the world. I suggest the "Krishna Gopeshvara" series. > hurr durr you guys booomers. Boomers vs Zoomers. Age doesn't matter outside of basic mental development and talking in meaningless terms that kids invent.

>>9902 Much of your worries look nothing out of the ordinary to someone who has a half working brain. I'd think the right way of going about things would be to consolidate ideas that you like and taking part in them, until you get good enough and grow confident. It might be out of touch with what others get up to but, who gives a shit? Ideally, you shouldn't.

>>9912 The moment people start to give a shit, its over for them. They may face defeat much later, but the fall starts right here. Being shameless or disconnected is necessary for achieving anything.

>>9908 >What album cover is this ? It's Gris' 'Il était une fôret'. Depressive Black Metal, quite theatrical. Not exactly a fan of metal in general, much less stuff with such harrowing and vulgar lyrical content but, I find that there's a strange and hopeless grandeur in this album. >Your mom taught you well. Simply means you are have grown beyond your social circle. Thanks Anon :) I always felt very self conscious of this trait of mine. My mom's a real fighter, came from a really fucked up household. She taught me a lot of good things. >Imposter syndrome is normal anon. All you can do is work towards it. Talk is cheap. Action is not. And action though requires more effort than talking, it feels more fulfilling too. My biggest flaw is procrastination, constant daydreaming and, my inability to stop overthinking. Not exactly unique but, it is crippling. Thinking of a better life, but feeling too scared to do so and you just daydream about it instead. It is something I have to fix, somehow. I will shut down the part that always overthinks and just, do shit. It's my only way out to the path I want to be on. >Nothing. The only meaningful conversations are ones you have with yourself. Really? I always felt overly conscious about it. I was always told by others that conversations with yourself, are a general way to developing full blown psychosis and schizophrenia. But, you said that true motivation comes from withing and never from outside. I guess that's another flaw of mine, I always keep my plans to myself and never speak them aloud, lest I get hurt or scolded. >Why do you think about how the world will see you ? What is the reason ? I'm not sure either Anon. Maybe it's because I feel like a hollow, sensualist and material shell rather than a being. I always want to not be a failure and I fear being hurt or brutally scolded or manhandled again. I did stupid shit when I was younger and I still have scars from it. >You cannot force it. Simple as that. Visit temples. Read texts. Listen to satsangs. Find what makes sense to you and why. Then go deeper into that idea. I see. My family is always into a strange idea of, taking stuff too literally, almost to a point of near ultra-orthodoxy. I mean sure, Muslims tend to be even more strict but I find that, I don't feel like my parents are too different from them either when it comes to beliefs. I was always told as to how the other Mathas are inferior to Advaita Vedanta. But I was never told about the constructed philosophical arguments that Adi Shankaracharya composed, to prove his points against the Buddhists and Jains, if that makes sense? Almost, too literal in their meaning, it feels Abrahamic in a weird way, even though they pride on themselves to not be like Christians, Jews, Muslims and so on. >These things are tough to express without sounding like a druggie hippie. The Grateful Dead isn't a bad band, at all. My biggest fear isn't to look like a painful, clueless hippie but rather, an annoying ISCKONite who genuinely believes that Vishnu is an avatar or Krishna, if that makes any sense. >Hackernews is better. I have not used it in a while sadly. I see. I don't use it though, given the fact that it is behind CloudFlare and, said service doesn't work on GNU IceCat. I also browse without Javascripat enabled so, there's that. I tend to use TOR for posting here though. I'm relatively interested in keeping my anonymity and privacy secure because I had been groomed online, by creepy women years ago and I practically doxxed myself by revealing my face, everything. I don't want to ever get manipulated like that again. I never make accounts for this reason. I fear that Linux Mint is also tracking me. I want to completely stop browsing all social media and, anything that uses something similar to CloudFlare and isolate myself, lest I ever be found again. Again, stylometry is a thing but, my aim isn't to find better social media or forums. My aim is to stop using anything that has trackers. I however, still fear that my writing style would be a massive giveaway. >Picrel is Krishna. He is not jacked with 6 packs etc. Men of different kinds, each of them have their strengths and uses in the world. I'm aware that men of different kinds have their own uses in the world. Men have a little bit of the feminine in them and, women have a bit of the masculine in them too. I just happen to have much more femininity inside of me than on average, and I'm trying to accept that. However, I feel like I've internalized certain expectations. I want to be more, pretty and have longer hair, soft skin and more, flamboyant expression or hell, even fucking dress up in girly clothing for all I know of. However, I'm not allowed to do so due to religious expectations and the desire of a certain 'masculine respectability'. I can't grow my hair, shave, get dolled up or do other stuff like that since I live with my parents, because I work a poorly-paying job. I don't have much autonomy but hey, at least I'm not a neckbeard or some whacko fetishist. But, my idealized self was never some macho armyman who happened to be jacked, malkhamb enjoyer at all. But rather, an educated, academic aesthete. But again, my family and relatives say for the protection of masculinity in Hindu Dharma, it is important that I be very masculine to preserve traditional values.... I don't know how to feel about this. I feel emasculated since people online always talk about long stories of how strong, Muslim men are abducting Hindu girls and, I feel ashamed in my lack of physicality, my frail physique, my interest in western stuff and my latent sensual tendency. I feel castrated. Like, I'm less of a man by doing so. My biggest insecurity though, is the fact that I fear that I will end up marrying a woman who will laugh at me, call me a fag and, treat me as lesser or, be thoroughly disgusted by my sensual, effeminate self. My mother's insistance on early marriage isn't helping me to alleviate my fears of inadequacy and degeneracy. I do love Krishna though, he's both wise yet playful, and has a graceful quality to him. I've always been a Krishna bhakt. >Age doesn't matter outside of basic mental development and talking in meaningless terms that kids invent.

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I see. I just felt that by being a younger person here, working a shitty dead-end job. I felt that my sheer presence here would disgust you people here. I felt, ashamed of posting my feelings here, especially since I always feel tracked and watched by the internet and computers. >>9912 >I'd think the right way of going about things would be to consolidate ideas that you like and taking part in them, until you get good enough and grow confident. It might be out of touch with what others get up to but, who gives a shit? Ideally, you shouldn't. You're saying, that I'm free to do whatever I want in life? That, I don't have to be embarassed about my interests and, try to consolidate ideals and stuff I like? I mean when I was a kid, I always feared studying or even affection. I feared that if I got praise at first, it would turn to scoldings and beatings later on, since I was constantly bullied hy others. I guess, that's why I always retreat and hide my ideas, because I feel that my very existence is going to inconvenience others. >>9913 >Being shameless or disconnected is necessary for achieving anything. So, don't think of what others are doing or thinking.... Just, do it? Is that my biggest problem? Is that it?

>>9918 > Gris' 'Il était une fôret' I love me some good DSBM. So far this album is fun. > constant daydreaming and, my inability to stop overthinking. Not exactly unique but, it is crippling. Always be doing. Karma'ing. Thought -> Action -> Feedback from action Rinse and repeat. Don't worry about the end goal. < Conversations with self Work will take care of this. External world noise and responsibilities will silence your inner voice. Still take 20 mins or so daily to sit with yourself. > Always want to not be a failure What you did when young doesn't matter. Kids experiment and do stupid shit. As an adult, your outcomes and the fate is not in your control. So just let go. Since you express interest in religion, read some texts. Your doubts are very basic and answered already. The books are cheap too or even free.

>>9918 > My family is always into a strange idea of, taking stuff too literally, almost to a point of near ultra-orthodoxy. Classical Hinduism needs updating, smritis for the current post Industrial age we are in now. Generally, Gurus are supposed to do this. I don't like the Sadhguru type faggots at all. > an annoying ISCKONite KEK. It is a step conversion for lost druggies and stupid people. > GNU IceCat Try Librewolf, it balances security and practicality better. Icecat will make your IP standout and glow in dragnet databases. > I want to be more, pretty and have longer hair, soft skin and more, flamboyant expression or hell, even fucking dress up in girly clothing for all I know of. However, I'm not allowed to do so due to religious expectations and the desire of a certain 'masculine respectability'. Way more common than people think. A gay friend made me aware of it. Moving out and away from family will help you. > say for the protection of masculinity in Hindu Dharma, it is important that I be very masculine to preserve traditional values Dharma is to be practiced, your dharma is based on your traits. Not everyone needs to be a physical kshatriya. Modern warfare is as much memeatic and psychological as anything else. More importantly, it may or may not be your dharma. > I feel emasculated since people online always talk about long stories of how strong, Muslim men are abducting Hindu girls It is all a psy op. Not to mention, people who do stupid things, win stupid prizes. > marrying Whom you marry and where you live, are the 2 most important decisions in your life. It is important to learn to judge a potential partner so as to not fuck that decision up. I cannot stress this enough. We don't discuss dating as a strategic game enough on this website. > by being a younger person here, working a shitty dead-end job WE were all that at some point and some still are. No harm in it. It is a phase we go through. > So, don't think of what others are doing or thinking.... Just, do it? Literally Yes.

>>9459 Called home. Parents pissed at my joblesness. I said I want to come home. They don't want me home. They want me to keep working and keep sending money home. Pretty disgusted right now.

Weird.dream. Was.typing to you guys and wife. As war was going on between India and US and then China and India dropped nukes on each other. In was outside Bombay and saw the planes. Ran inside though I wanted to see the cloud. Laptopnand phone are.emp safe. Had water saved and some food.. Heard the first shockwave outside and though in was safe, electricity gone. I was going to be bored AF.

Strange subreddit I found. https://old.reddit.com/r/GoodGirlsCommunity/top/?sort=top&t=all I can't tell if they're being serious, or of it's a fetish sub for women, or if it's a fetish sub for men LARPing as women. They capitalize their husband's pronouns ("I love Him so much and He is my entire world") which i found to be strange. >>9949 Kek at pic #2. In pic#1 maybe the training dataset should have been something other than posts by chuds.

https://chillphysicsenjoyer.substack.com/p/youre-a-slow-thinker-now-what >>9969 > Subreddit Maybe it is performative or maybe these women just need some comfy posting. Women are not like men when it comes to comfy stuff or lack of it. Modernity is worst for women than it is for men (the irony that feminists brought us to this point). > Pic 2 I feel like Pic 2 in social situations. I wish I had a grenade.

God, I'm feel tired. Just living, barely counting another day in your existence, then pray for the hours to end and then feel inevitably bad at the end of the remains of the setting day. I no longer keep track of dates. Actually, I haven't kept track of the dates since years now. Even when I was trying to finish high school, and during my degree too. I'm tired of having to live out my remaining days. There's nothing in life that is truly worth waiting for. No lasting satisfactions, not a single feeling that truly cuts deep though your body and cleaves it open in lasting and memorable pain. I am tired, people are watching me. The CCTV chink shit cam at the local thela, the surveilance at the local supermarket, the UPI pay that everyone uses, the copy of my retina and fingerprint in my biometrics that is now in some babu's server in the form called 'Aadhar'. I can't root my phone and delete shitty google and the dehati chinkware from it. It always watches me, even my mom's phone listens in to me. I'm tired of having to work a dead end job, I'm tired of the few hoidays I do get and the constant sick leaves I have to take that I don't get paid for. My health always fails, and the days get wasted by me just the same. I sit alone, away from everything else and pray nothing ever comes that requires me to think. I intentionally sleep less than 5 fuckin' hous a day, just to intentionally feel sleepy, numb and half-comatose the next day. I don't want to feel active, the little joys I make are only fleeting. I don't want to feel because I know no true feeling will never cleave me open and radiate in every nerve and neuron of my brain. I once spent a year barely on 4 hours a day, sleeping at 4 a.m. aand waking up at 8 and sleeping at the professor's lectures because I wanted to kill myself and not exist during those days. I've never known a me ever since, even when I'm happy. My memories are all blurry and fried up. I just want to run over someone in a car, kill someone, rape someone, send a knife through someone's neck or go all MAGAtard and go shoot up a place and hear their screams like how the average American thinks workplaces and schools are designated shooting streets. I want to rape a fucking foid wide open in public, I want to fucking fap with my dick out in public completely nude. I want to see someone squa and die. If some spoilt politician's son can do it and get with a small fine or even and essay, but I know I would never be able to get away with it. I can't. Can't, won't.I just want to taste blood, whether it's my own or whether it's someone else's, I don't care. I can't keep it in all the time. I want to rage pure fucking mayhem and cruelty like a werewolf, howl at the moon. I'm tired of being another pathetic dead-end wagie who is semi-NEET anyway. The world is a cruel and terrible place and I am fucking frightened by how I am not born in some shithole in Ukraine, North Korea or Somalia,instead living a relatively comfy nigger life. Every living creature, every person on this earth subsists on cruelty, malie and pure hatred like how the children of parasitoid wasps feed within the bodies of living caterpillars. What good karma did I do to even deserve such a comfy life? God, I wish the fucking glowies and RAW agents who know every move of mine just fucking snipe me through the neck or through the fucking brain stem so that I know that they are done with me, I'm tired of the knowing dread that they are always looking at me all times, that they know stuff about me even I dont't. I'm tired of them constatnly waiting and surveiling me, I just want them to come up and get me. I can't kill myself because I will be born horribly the next life if I did so and, I barely have any karma to my credit. I fear god and I never pray because I know such a deity would truly be disgusted by the thoughts I harbour. I tried punching against a wall today, but I am fucking disgusted with myself because my hand always pulls back before I can truly hit hard on my knucles, like a fucking female. I won't cut myself because it's for fucking fags, tumblrina/twitter white nationalist anorexic teen girls who dye their hair blond to get some mid white guy and attention, DSBM tiktok fags who don't listen to any other black metal other than I dunno, Sadness? And emo fags who cut for aesthetics, and redditors. I have more respect for 4chan /tttt/ fags than cutters because there's an occasional legit schizo there. I have swelling over a vein of a knuckle after punching but it doesn't even give me satisfaction. It doesn't cut and cleave open my soul. I feel drained and empty. God, if I wasn't a fucking female-level of menestruating pussy in terms of schizoness, I would have actually shattered my knucles but even then it wouldn't be enough. No level of pain feels like it affects me, it passes away after a while and it never gets into my guts. I want to end this pathetic cycle of existence like a schizo, not a pussy or wimp. >>9969 Tradwives. Possibly the biggest psyop known to mankind. A lot of them are unironic alt-righter MAGAtards, Qtards or, cryptofeminists. I remember a big expose on Shitter when one of the most famous tradwife accounts happened to simply a basement guy with a severe porn addiction and another famous account happened to be a whore grifter with an OnlyFans account. >>9973 >Maybe it is performative or maybe these women just need some comfy posting. Women are not like men when it comes to comfy stuff or lack of it. Modernity is worst for women than it is for men (the irony that feminists brought us to this point). Mate, I remember once unironically having a Tumblr just a few years back. A lot of girls and LARP accounts. They pretend to be a whore little good girl so that they can avoid all responsibility (I've seen the top posts, they scream DDLG fetish) and say "I was so baddy daddy, please punish widdle me" so that they can deny having a severe porn addiction and, the responsibility to grown up. Assuming they were't all E-girls or men LARPing. They ain't legit. My experiences were before these tradwife porn accounts blew up. Don't trust bitches.

>>9976 I understand. You have been in a deep spiral for a while from what I understand. Your job has been shit for a long while < Work on CV, even if you make just 1 meaningful line daily, it is enough. < Feels will come and go. There is no point in letting feels decide your action. < Sleep is paramount, without that your judgement is fucked. Getting out of this cycle will take taking back control of your time, getting out of react mode. It is very tough and I understand it. Have been through such phases myself, in 1 case it lasted years. > Tradwives and performative females I ignore internet trends generally. Because internet behaviour is signalling. There is nothing real about it. I am not disgusted by Signalling, but the fakeness does nothing for me. I am interested in meeting real people and hearing real things. > DSBM Tiktokers LOL I did not know this exists.

>>9977 >You have been in a deep spiral for a while from what I understand. I wouldn't call it a spiral in the stricter sense. Its rather a series of 'on and off' if anything it could be called. I have been going though this since high school. Feel empty and suicidal a d then go back to normal again. It comes and goes after a whilw. >Getting out of this cycle will take taking back control of your time, getting out of react mode. It is very tough and I understand it. Really? How? I have been feeling on edge all day today. In the afternoon I could feel my heartbeat spike up like crazy and beat i.n my chest. My mind was just screaming for fucking murder and that I am being watched by spyware and glowies. I had to stop myself so hard from starting to strangle someone in my workplace today. I wanted to set afire, explode or shoot out and entire fucking place my mind was screaming like a werewolf for it. > Work on CV, even if you make just 1 meaningful line daily, it is enough. I see. I feel sad because I wasted all opportunities when I Was younger. Now, i have a mediocre degree and no extremely qualifications such as Cisco web, Garp, internships . Nothing. I feel scared and disappointed and worried I sometimes feel everything is watching me and not even something like phones but like, the porcelain washbasin and tap water is tracking me at times. Its rare and doesn't happen often but still. Even if I'm not super depressed or in fight mode, i still have no zeal or will for life However, I am even more scared because I fear that I will be laid off soon and become NEET because I have been taking so many sick leaves and i already have cut pay and my breathing issues are flaring up again and I can't fucking breathe or sleep properly. Want to rub salt and lemon in a cut open wound but cutting is for fags and I can't just burn skin because the scars are hard to hide >I am not disgusted by Signalling, but the fakeness does nothing for me. I am interested in meeting real people and hearing real things. I see. Can understand but i dont have many contacts in real life. So I spend all my life online. >LOL I did not know this exists. You go outside unlike me, this is a good thing. < Feels will come and go. There is no point in letting feels decide your action. < Sleep is paramount, without that your judgement is fucked. Will se anon. I'm too breathless and coughing to sleep rn since I can barely lie down without ny throat feeling like it's shutting right and sinking down at the moment.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CONOP_8888 This is too cool. >>9980 Sounds like you need medical attention. Will reply tomorrow in detail.

>>9976 >surveillance It's going to get worse when the govenment babus finally bring DNA sampling in india. They'd probably take newborns' DNA samples and link them to Aadhar IDs, not jut the one for the newborn, but for all his relatives. Then they can pull up genetic information about any person in the country, of course this will be for "law enforcement purposes". Not even organizations in the West have been able to keep law enforcement hands off the data they collect (stupid stuff like 23andme. I can not believe westoids sometimes. "Let me send a DNA sample to a random company so I can know if I have genes from XYZ country"), in India it's going to be expected of the government to have access to al the data and use or misuse it in any way they want. We're really fond of taking things from the West, but not before stripping off everything that makes these things good in the slightest. And once the stripping is done, it's forced down the throats of people. It's going to be like Truecaller, you may choose not to install it, or have escaped from it somehow, but once anyone who has you saved in their contacts installs it, that's as good as installing it yourself, now your number is in a private directory without your permission and random people can look you up if they want, and you can barely do anything about it. Well at least truecaller has a function to remove your number, or change your display name, which works sometimes and requires you to install the app first i.e. hand over your contact list and then they will think about removing your name from the public registry. >violent thoughts sometimes I feel like beating people up would also solve my problems. >Google and Android Why can't you do it? It's difficult, a lot of apps would refuse to serve you, and you will be on your own - no bug reports, no security fixes. But it's not impossible. >rape Tangential but it's stupid how people completely shut down at the first mention of the word. Bunch of free thinkers always looking to deplatform people who don't think the same way as they do. It's a terrible crime, but it's not voldemort. It truly disgusts me how they censor words like rape and murder, even on websites which have absolutely no rules against the full spelling of the words. Not just because it doesn't let you see the entire gravity of the crimes, but because it's an obvious attempt at pandering to some algorithm on Twitter or Instagram, that pandering taking higher priority than actually talking about the crime - and shows you how dumb the person is for doing the same thing on reddit. Reddit had an ask-a-rapist thread, which grew very fast and then the "but muh wammen!" people shut it down. God forbid anyone question the rape of a woman. Indeed, the only channels you need to get your information about rape from, must be approved by the mainstream. No, you cannot listen to what the convicted rapist said. Of course, he'll downplay his crime. But that's no reason to censor people. You can view a few remnants of the thread here. https://www.reveddit.com/v/AskReddit/comments/x6yef/reddits_had_a_few_threads_about_sexual_assault/

>>9980 So serious answer - Try allergy pills to see if you feel better on them in terms of breathing. Normally the simplest cause these days - Try sleeping with your back and head at a slightly raised https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5012822/ - Idk what insurance etc you have , but it is worth taking time off of job, getting this fixed and coming back. Talk to your boss or HR about it. If they don't agree then it is not worth continuing anyway. >>9982 > Censorship Left started this BS. Words are violence but violence is not violence > sometimes I feel like beating people up would also solve my problems. Getting a hobby that is similar to this, really really helps. Karate/MMA/Hunting etc is nice. Even woodworking is satisfying.

>>9980 If it is auto immune then it is more complicated and could also be triggered by stress.

Yesterday was such a shitty fucking day. Today was tiring but better. Still so much to do. Life is unrelenting. But business is better than nothing. My wife made me happy by getting a ton of papad. Microwave and papad is great stress snack

today's list of awkward moments is the longest of such list in years. Largely unrelated to each other. Funny. >>9984 >Left started this BS. They started censorship of one kind, but it looks like they are also against the censorship of words in social media, if only because if the severity of these crimes is dampened, they can't cry foul as loud. >Getting a hobby that is similar to this, really really helps It's fun, but not in that sense because you're not really allowed to hate or be angry at your opponent. It's usually friendly. >woodworking Kek I'd rather not have a hammer in my hands in that mood. What does help me when I'm feeling angsty is a lot of food, sleep, or overexerting myself in cardio. The first time you do intense cardio in a considerably long time - and push yourself too far, you have zero energy to be angry after you're done. I used to be asleep before my head hit the pillow back when I started doing cardio (now stopped for a year+) Apart from this being unrested or having acidity makes you think weird thoughts and do weird things so the sleep and the food helps. And a shower/bath.

My biggest fear is that like the protaganist of Tartar Steppe, my moment to shine will never come. I wasted my time in preparing for exams and getting good scores, growing smart etc. Now all of it feels pointless. Like a soldier, whose battle will never come.

>>10001 Violence is cathartic.

>>10006 It makes me feel even weaker. In that you're angry at something or someone, or hate yourself because of something you did or didn't do. And now you want to beat up someone. Who is this someone? Not anyone responsible for your anger. Someone else. So now you're weaker for being slave to your emotions. Its worse if you're violent or throw words at someone who is close to you. You're taking out your frustration on someone who is probably one of the only ones who will take your shit - because you're too pussy and no one else who has a spine.

>>10007 Words are not violence. Violence is violence. Though i agree. Losing your rational self to anger is impotence.

>>10009 Kekekekekek

Post humanism Communist cities UBI Banking criss Holy shit its all here. Going yo wake up early and withdraw tomorrow

Arrattai messanger actually doesn't have 3rd party trackers. Atleast for now.

I want to have money so I can buy a small warehouse kind of space. - Own a 3-Printer - Own a lathe machine and tools - Have tons of wood and concrete - Have a nice Gayming Pee Cee - Own musical instruments that I want Instead I am in a shared apartment , with little to no control over my life or time. I know the smoke is bad for me, but it is all I have right now.

I am very dissatisfied with where I am in life right now.

>>10016 It's basically impossible to buy anything that touches the ground in any of the big metro cities unless you are already very wealthy. What do you intend to make with the lathe and the 3d printer? What instruments do you play? Personally I'm a sucker for iron and I hoard anything made of iron. Solid iron is best, but sometimes all you can get your hands on is sheets and spring kind of things. The heaviness of iron cannot really be overstated and it just feels so good to handle. I'd been hoarding chain-sprocket pair from an old motorcycle, tie rods from car, and timing belt and pulleys (although they are made of aluminium, a timing kit is a momento - 1L km or however many years.) But I let them go, eventually.

>>10019 I don't want to stay in metro area. A small town will be fine for me. > What do you intend to make with the lathe and the 3d printer? - My own plantation system - Tools and weapons - My own musical instruments - Moulds for cement so I can pour cement in shapes I want. > What instruments do you play ? Bass and Acoustic guitar Tabla Keyboard I am fully self taught. But my marwadi family hates music. So I am a closeted musician and living away from family , so I have some space for myself. But job sucks, so all my time and energy goes into that. I want to get a Sitar too, but a good one is not cheap. I love IRON too anon. I have a cast iron pan, that someone threw away and I restored using lot of cleaning chemicals and a lot of sanding paper. It is my most prized possession. I hate that everything modern is built with cheap materials, with no love in it whatsoever. Cheap plastic, weak bricks, toxic paint and very bad metals.

>>9459 Kek. I almost uploaded my cv here.

Weird developments in my life from sagas spanning multiple iterations of Indiachan. >friend that betrayed me is still in my life, but now somewhat sidelined. He's gotten better but after a few more instances his presence is minimized in my life. Wish him the best but I don't want to deal with him and I don't trust him, simple as. >Mexican receptionist from 2 or 3 years ago reached out to me bizarrely. Still had a crush on her after all these years and we talked but it quickly felt like I was doing all the heavy lifting and have stopped. Nice to have some closure on a what if that had been bothering me for a few years. While she is hot, the personality and distance made me realize it wasn't worth the emotional labour. Still wish her the best, no hard feelings. >leg is starting to feel better. Was near 100% from May to June but I reinjured it. Feeling hopeful. >leaving Canada. All waiting on my leg to heal but it will happen in the next few months. Not sure for how long but it increasingly feels like forever, if not physically then mentally and in a more existential sense, spiritually. To Germanon, sorry to hear about your family members passing. Grief is the best indicator of love after the fact. Hope everyone is doing well. I don't intend to post that often anymore, I've reached a point where most of my thoughts stay internal and I don't feel a need to harmonize or disharmonize with the state of the world. I've started to find peace inside myself, and I've realized that's the only goal worth pursuing in life because everything else comes from it.

>>10029 I actually remember these posts. We had so many good conversations. Do keep posting even if not as regular. I understand not needing to express anything. I myself feel similarly, but keep posting because this is the last place I exist online as myself without any filters. As for dead family, mine is a very tragic family. I don't know what the future holds for the clan. I have done a lot, more so than I can. I have followed my dharma. Eventually life is tiring. Its nice to have a place like this where I indulge in my own thoughts and ideas. Which is why I say, you should keep posting. As for Canada, well, I like the country, but it had been sold long ago. You are getting out at the right time, before shit really really hits the fan. I cannot stress than enough.

>>10029 < Mexican receptionist from 2 or 3 years ago reached out to me bizarrely. Still had a crush on her after all these years and we talked but it quickly felt like I was doing all the heavy lifting and have stopped. Nice to have some closure on a what if that had been bothering me for a few years. While she is hot, the personality and distance made me realise it wasn't worth the emotional labour. Still wish her the best, no hard feelings. The Gen Z term is attention farming. Men and women that were not raised so well, have a higher need for attention than normal people. Such people are a very bad idea to be friends with let alone date. < friend that betrayed me is still in my life, but now somewhat sidelined. He's gotten better but after a few more instances his presence is minimised in my life. Wish him the best but I don't want to deal with him and I don't trust him, simple as. The number of good friends I have dumped for similar reasons, it is sad but also necessary. I also changed and grew in time. But as life got harder, i had no time and space for people I couldn't trust.

My writing has gotten bad. I need to fix this. >>10020 Do share your work.

>>10020 Nice job with instruments. I am eternal keyboard noob. But I practice when I can. Do/did you follow a book or a program? I just try to play my favourite songs but a structured approach would do me good. Lessons weren't worth it in my experience. Teaching self takes you much farther if you have the discipline to practice yourself. I enrolled for harmonium classes at first. The lady was skilled, but many classical music teachers still behave like it's the gurukul days (i.e. a lot of self-importance and being inconsiderate towards students) for the two days a week class, she'd often skip one day, come late on the other, and didn't really do or say much. When she did, she'd shout at the kids in class, and it unironically gave me flashbacks to school. I quit in a month or two. She wants back the gurukul days but some students like me are corporate wageslaves. I enrolled for keyboard classes instead. It was good, but I found diminishing gains, practicing myself is the only way, so I quit that too. >small town Doable, good luck.

>>10045 I started with a teacher who used to hit on underage chicks. It was disgusting. I left in a month. I wish I could have learnt gurukul style, but I am also a wagie and I don't have patience or time to be dedicated full time. I am self taught entirely. - Scales - How to create chords - Learn basic 10 thaats. Somehow it all clicked in places after that.

I guess that this probably belongs more on the tech thread or, even the politics one, but I feel that since I am a pathetic amateur, it's probably better for me to post on on the random/general thread here. Unfortunately I am not into a STEM-related career but I always have had an interest in computers. Guess having to pirate software, movies and music on my own on a early age sparked this bug into life inside of me. When I was a kid, I always wondered how people removed DRM, split RAR files and did stuff like that, and how they didn't get immediately caught by doing such stuff. The fact that people could do such magic with computers at such low levels (especially ROM hacks), it always made me feel so curious about how the did it, how the old masters did it. In particular, for the past few years I read up on how a lot of old programs, techdemos (even in the present day) and stuff like that was written in binary, hexadecimal, assembly OPCODES. And I know that it directly maps on to the implementation of logic gates, ALU and such shit like that. But to start with it, especially since I am looking for a modern platform feels fruitless. I don't really want to learn it for something ancient like the 68k or Z80 (you can call me a faggot for this, I don't mind) and the most important thing I have noticed is the absolute enshittification of results. It's slightly less bad for ASM but for regular coding, it just sucks. Nothing like MAN pages, documents, University articles aimed at beginners, or even old-skool stuff like say, Fravia or Iczelion or stuff like that. It's all these flashy Medium sites, SEO scamware pages, and bootcamp ads for Python and YT videos. I know that corporates always ruin everything but even the few ASM stuff I see nowadays tends to be for skiddie-tier reverse engineering of Malware for 1337 H4X0R points and not even something like the basics, syntax, documentation or programming for its own creative sake. I get that it's a pain to code complex stuff in such low-level languages and that most people stick to higher-level stuff but, I simply want to learn modern low-level stuff and hexadecimal, debugging and dumping for its own sake. Because computers as a whole facsinate me. I want to know how each and every layer of software abstraction is built from scratch (yes, I know that it all maps to silicon and electrons in the end but like I said, you are free to call me a faggot for this) and how it layers up into a modern system. It's something I barely see any resources for, especially since I'm not something like a CSE major, Math/Physics major or a PHd in anything. By the way, I've noticed that back in the day, there used to be a lot of tutorials for cracking or patching SecuROM, Starfoce, and even older DRMs and people were more open to sharing secrets. Now in the age of Denuvo and online checks, people don't share their knowledge as often. Piracy as a whole feels much more commercialised than before, especially on PC. Android odding is a bit better in this regard but iirc the only guy who made a tutorial to patch Denuvo, Voksi got caught, MKDev and CODEX gave up, 3DM barely does anything anymore, EMPRESS was an insufferable arse who had a knackfor sending threats and fucked off anyway, and idk what Razor1911 is doing. I think it's very sad that by how massive the internet has become, finding information has only become harder. There's information but it has only become much harder to access, lost in sludges of algorithmic noise and with legitimate information not necessarily being deleted but just drowned out enough to keep out most people. The Glowies do their job, the people are kept as mindless consoomers. Guess I should actually start playing MGS2 and, start to read Baudrillard's Simulacra and Simulation (you are again entited to call me an idiot for thinking to read Baudrillard. But again, he did inspire MGS2 and The Matrix so, yeah. I don't care if he's lefty, I'm not a wingnat). And I've noticed something in politics, these weird LLM Corps. are all made by Nick Land fans. It could be a massive reddit-tier nothingburger but, I honestly kinda have my doubts that reddit might actually be right about this one. Nick Land seems to have basically thought that AI was the ultimate form of alien, lovecraftian capital that accelerates to post-humanity. Also Landian Hyperstition seems to be about that by repeating a myth or model, it becomes true after countless repetitions. I honestly seem to believe that given Peter Thiel and Palantir (basically 0 information available on Palantir but I do know that it seems to be linked to surveilance) and Sam Altman's weird belief of whatever the fuck buzzword jargon 'effective altruism' is supposed to mean and, Grimes' weird associations with some chick called Aella who holds rape parties for weirdo techno-nihilistic tech bros in Silicon Valley and, her links with Samo Burja, I think that this LLM craze seems to have deeper ties. It's probably because Tech is slowly displacing (or rapidly displacing) the old vanguards of the World Order in a capitalistic society like Big Pharma, Banking, Energy (especially coal/oil) and even Telecom to a certain extent, I feel that a lot of the silly politics in the world right now is an extension of this, especially since the alt-right seems to be very connected to tech. It could again be just some nothingburger wholesome keanu chungus type of reddit theories but honestly, even a broken clock is right twice a day. Also I want to know how billionaires work and how politics is truly never in control of us people. I think that TATA has been involved in deforestation in very ecologically sensitive regions of South Asia and Africa, a lot of the current German parliament and poltical leaders have Nazi ties, Bill Gates's family was involved in a major thinktank and he himself came from a senator's (or just a politically influential background with a lot of money), how BlackRock controls Canadian foreign politcy and the housing market and even immigration, how a good 90% of modern Psychology and Psychiatry research comes from CIA kinda shit and, Petronas war crimes. I want to be more aware of these kinds of stuff. I don't think it's going to be like some weird illuminati satanic abortions by Jewish-Palestinian woke order of 300 in a round circle but, i feel that it's just a play by rich people and we are all cogs and machines in it. It's more than probably an ego game with no true origin, like it always has been. Btw Wikipedia is trash, and I hate how biased it is. I am also too retarded to find out the primary sources on a topic since I have 0 idea where to start. I don't have tiktok brain, but I simply do not have any idea where I can start doing proper research on any topic. I also do not trust these Abijit Iyer Mitra, Defense With Adi, Sham Sharma and Sanjay Dixit type of people. If Government started doing DNA extractions at birth and tied it into the Aadhar cards of newborns and tied it to a DNA database of family members, they'd whole heartedly support it as "owning the wokes, leftists, radicals, and anti-nationals". They are just narrators of a narrative, the narrative of which has no end or birth point. God, I hate culture wars and how it leaks into every part of the world. The line between the online and the real has blurred and almost died, making a, hyperreality of sorts. Everyone jerks off Israel when they are also a USA puppet and they literally fund insurgencies in NE India (also want to know more about this) So in short, I want to not be retarded enough to start reading the primary sources and learn how to find them and read them, learn low level programming and logic to create my own stuff like say, engines, graphics, any modern stuff really.... Learn about how politicians and billionaires and corpos and just 2 sides of the same coin and how they subsume critique and rebellion into them, just as another escapist narrative (Disco Elysium predicted this very well. Fuck the dystopian and cyberpunk genres, just another fantasy.), and... yeah. I am but a fag.

>>10051 नाइस पेंटिंग

>>10051 Your unhinged rants are very dense. Takes a while to read and reply. >I am not into a STEM-related career but I always have had an interest in computers. Comp Sci guys are working in Mc Donalds these days. You are good. The era of STEM education as Enginiggers is over. Now if you have a functioning GIT then you get a job much faster than you do with a degree. There is nothing stopping you from living your dream. > but, I simply want to learn modern low-level stuff and hexadecimal, debugging and dumping for its own sake. Depends how low you want to go. Assembly, FORTRAN, C or COBOL ? All of them are quiet possible though not as easy as pulling a python tutorial. I am disgusted with modern web and python programming too. It is written by and for blue collar wagies, who copy pasta chunks of code and inter connect them, often with little or not understanding. My own life is busy and my own interests are varied, so I stick to 1-2 languages for personal projects and BASH for file management. > Because computers as a whole facsinate me Then get a RISC V sbc and get cracking. > It's something I barely see any resources for, especially since I'm not something like a CSE major, Math/Physics major or a PHd in anything. institutional support is a meaningless joke. It is used to justify paying these faggots low waqes while they work themselves to death. While I loved getting my advanced degrees, in terms of money they are a joke. A smart Bsc/Btech guy earns as much if not more. > Piracy as a whole feels much more commercialised than before, especially on PC. Android odding is a bit better in this regard but iirc the only guy who made a tutorial to patch Denuvo, Voksi got caught, MKDev and CODEX gave up, 3DM barely does anything anymore, EMPRESS was an insufferable arse who had a knackfor sending threats and fucked off anyway, and idk what Razor1911 is doing. IT has all moved to USENET now with a strong community, I am sadly still disconnected, life is too busy. All I do is stream pirated anime and download the ocassional books that I need DRM free. > I think it's very sad that by how massive the internet has become, It is a matrix,. A filter for the redpilled who want to break free and leave the matrix, which is what I see it as. Coming back to the matrix is seeing the life I used to have. But overall life exists outside the matrix for me. > these weird LLM Corps. are all made by Nick Land fans It is a cover up for upcoming techno communism. Plain as day. AI is also a reddit tier mid wit with way more compute and recursions, so in a way, imagine reddit tier mid wit, having his reddit intellect grow thousand lifetimes. SO it is an alien life form. But the alien is retarded. > Also I want to know how billionaires work and how politics is truly never in control of us people. Bill gates's gradfather was a bigdeal in the Rand corporation. So was Bezos's. All current German politicians are kids or grandkids of senior Nazi party members. As are many American and current RAND corporation members. On a related note I can recommend the following book "The U.S. Did Not Defeat Fascism in WWII, It Discreetly Internationalized It" > BlackRock controls Canadian Canada is a resource bag for the deep state. > how a good 90% of modern Psychology and Psychiatry research comes from CIA kinda shit Yes. See the Century of mind all 4 parts. > i feel that it's just a play by rich people and we are all cogs and machines in it. Since the fall of roman empire, the same jewish families have accumulated wealth, by being bankers for the church first then expanding into central banking. Their wealth is multiple times the national debt of USA. They do control lot of things. If you connect Hindu lore to David Icke, then it is a branch of the naga lok people pretending to be humans. They are engineering earth to be more suitable for their life above ground and while they don't hate all humans, they do hate some and are working on slowly eliminating them. > I also do not trust these Abijit Iyer Mitra, Defense With Adi, Sham Sharma and Sanjay Dixit type of people. You cannot. They are allowed to selectively leak somethings and other they are not. Any popular journo who hits these truths will be hitby government or paid to stfu. That is why Padukone gets govt contracts. > The line between the online and the real has blurred and almost died, making a, hyperreality of sorts. Everyone jerks off Israel when they are also a USA puppet and they literally fund insurgencies in NE India (also want to know more about this) Line blurring is on purpose. Preparing humans for techno communism to control them via their digital implants.

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Israel and CIA fund themselves via the drug trade. Since the drug production took a hit in Afghanistan, it was shifted to Myanmar and NE. Since Myanmari's showed resistance, USA wants to create a small "Christian" state here to produce drugs that are sold and the profits fund CIA. > (Disco Elysium predicted this very well. Fuck the dystopian and cyberpunk genres, just another fantasy.) Offended. Gibson informed my childhood a lot. I even made a small handheld cyberdeck using an old Nokia E series when I could buy parts but it got boring. Now by 14'' laptop is my second brain. Your best bet is to decide on small achievable projects and dedicate 30 mins daily to each. Do no more than 2 at a time and keep a tracker to track all of it. Or use a 2nd brain notebook/software.

>>10051 >The fact that people could do such magic with computers at such low levels (especially ROM hacks), it always made me feel so curious about how the did it, how the old masters did it I want to learn this stuff too but there is no point reiterating my miserable lack of time. >programming for the sake of it >CODEX, 3DM, Razor1911 Kek nostalgic. I suppose those leet haxxors eventually had to shoulder more responsibilites and/or found something more worth their time and dropped this eventually. >Nick Land I have no idea who Lick Lund is. >>10053 >I am disgusted with modern web and python programming too. It is written by and for blue collar wagies, who copy pasta chunks of code and inter connect them, often with little or not understanding. That's what all the abstractions are for, so you can teach retards to hack code together. More supply = less pay. Yes maybe a simple text editor developed by these people causes the CPU to overheat, but at least the production >USENET I will have to look into this.

>>10056 Nick Land is the accelerationism guy. He advocates for integrating humans with tech. Midwit philosophy. He is right about collapse of west. But that doesn't apply to us dharmics.

>>10051 You consume too much brainrot man all these internet philosophers who cannot even manange to live a healthy life

>>10051 Stop consuming braindead internet troons. Take the dharma pill.

>>10064 Fuck the dharma pill. It has given me nothing but shit. Imagine spending 5 years of your life in phD, sleepless nights, tight deadlines, hopelessness just to earn respect in society of being a scholar. Guess what? If you are a Dharmic IskCON faggot, the director of top IIT's just suck your dick and give you a smooth phD in 2-3 years in some random ass shit + AI/ML written with it. Not only that, unlike a phD scholar who struggles with life after degree cuz his supervisor doesn't give a fuck, those faggots gets free tie up and gazillion dollar pay from one of many IskCON international suckers who have full control over education institute. All my life I just want to get away from these people, let them do their thing, but they really like to steal from poor and siphon it back to their masters. I'm not a phD but I've been with a lot of iskCON "scholars"

>>10065 Sorry for overreacting. Dharma pill is great if you follow local culture and traditions. BUT FUCK ISKCON

>>10051 It is what it is anon

>>10051 Did you discovermy identity?

>>10066 Fuck ISCON.

I've been busy with work for these days, so my responses aren't as quick as I wish them to be. My apologies. >>10053 >Your unhinged rants are very dense. Takes a while to read and reply. Ah, my apologies. It tends to be a strange mix of desperation and anger that fuels them, maybe because I feel pathetic for having such worries that I put down as my rants. But it is also partially because I tend to read and write a lot of denser authors... Maybe it reflects in my thought processes too? >Depends how low you want to go. >Assembly, FORTRAN, C or COBOL ? AMD64 Assembly and OpenGL/Vulkan. While I do know that x86 and AMD64 are reputed as particularly ugly architectures to code for, they are also easy to fins since most PCs are of either two of these architectures. I have heard good things about RISC-V and you did recommend getting a RISC-V based SBC but I am afriad I cannot acquire one right now, not to mention that I want to learn Assembly for a commonly used platform first. It's probably impractical but I don't really care since I only want to learn it for personal satisfaction, I am not learning it to build a resume or 'UpSkIlLiNG'. >I am disgusted with modern web and python programming too. It is written by and for blue collar wagies, who copy pasta chunks of code and inter connect them, often with little or not understanding. Finally, a relatable sentiment. It's kind of a shame that even C is considered complex. While I never really coded much in C, it is however a very clean interface to learn basic loops and concepts. In my opinion, a newbie should simply not touch OOP. But again, I'm not exactly a programmer by trade and while I do know some Java and some very basic C, my memory is shaky; especially since I do not work in a computer-adjacent field. >IT has all moved to USENET now with a strong community Ah! I see now. I currently am a bit too busy to afford one, I did use USENET a long time ago, admittedly not for Warez; since my provider at that time was Eternal-September.org and they have a strict no-warez policy. I should see to get a provider in the future...I wonder what newsgroups are they the most active on? >AI is also a reddit tier mid wit with way more compute and recursions, so in a way, imagine reddit tier mid wit, having his reddit intellect grow thousand lifetimes. SO it is an alien life form. But the alien is retarded. KEK. >Bill gates's gradfather was a bigdeal in the Rand corporation. So was Bezos's. >All current German politicians are kids or grandkids of senior Nazi party members. As are many American and current RAND corporation members. I am aware of them both. However, I am very interested to know the shadowy details and intrigue... Because I also happen to write stories as an hobby and also because I simply want to learn more about the world around me. I mean, feel free to call me a faggot for this but, I am trying to write a horror-noir story with a lot of political intrigue so it might be useful for me to know about these stuff for the storyline's sake and, for my own mind. >Israel and CIA fund themselves via the drug trade. Since the drug production took a hit in Afghanistan, it was shifted to Myanmar and NE. Since Myanmari's showed resistance, USA wants to create a small "Christian" state here to produce drugs that are sold and the profits fund CIA. Now this is, golden. I really want to learn more more about these kinds of deals, especially since the online 'Dharmic', 'nationalist' and 'hindu' spaces are completely retarded and they provide free cunnilingus to Israel. Or should I say... more licking the boots and licking their arses? Besides, Jews and Muslims are just as much of Mlecchas to us as are Europeans. I don't see any benefit by taking Israel's side. I'd love to read more about these kinds of stuff. >You cannot. They are allowed to selectively leak somethings and other they are not. Any popular journo who hits these truths will be hitby government or paid to stfu. That is why Padukone gets govt contracts. Funnily enough, I've noticed that with these channels... They co-opt even seemingly radical ideas and twist them into pure, blindly nationalist narratives. Sanjay Dixit I've noticed, loves talking about the 'deep state' and Dharmic supremacy and the Muslim stuff. But, he also blindly sucks off Israel in the Israel-Palestine shit. QAnon is absolutely batshit insane but yet most QTards will suck off a literal Billionaire (Trump). Talk about Cultural resistance co-optation. >Offended. Gibson informed my childhood a lot My apologies. I did not mean to say that Cyberpunk as a genre is inherently bad. Classics are all nice. Deus Ex and MGS2 are still the greats. What I meant to say that Cyberpunk as an aesthetic and genre has become part of the very mainstream culture it once meant to oppose. Reddit threads about Cyberpunk 2077, countless sci-fi shows about quirky hackers defeating corrupt government officials. It has in part, largely co-opted and become a mere escape fantasy. Reminds me of how literal Nazi Germany used to have state-approved comedies about corrupt officials and businessmen. >Your best bet is to decide on small achievable projects and dedicate 30 mins daily to each. Do no more than 2 at a time and keep a tracker to track all of it. Or use a 2nd brain notebook/software. Will do :) >>10062 >>10063

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>>10064 I am not a Nick Land fan. I too want to start with our old Dharmic stuff and learn how it really is without all those Aunty-isms, weird Sad guru worship (involves IIT ISKCON 'brahmacharis', performative people on Twatter, Krishna fangirls, Kulcha warriors, and Tharki uncles who will repost and thirst after even the most medicre white women if they happen to perform Hinduism; double bonus if said women are Easter European and her husband is Indian.) >>10065 >Guess what? If you are a Dharmic IskCON faggot, the director of top IIT's just suck your dick and give you a smooth phD in 2-3 years in some random ass shit + AI/ML written with it. ISKCON used to do a lot of high profile drug trade in the 80's. They also rake in money from retarded Metro city people. The average temple is basically Hindu-themed Disneyland, which I guess attracts a lot of people looking for something 'cool' or 'unique'. ISKCON also markets themselves very well. They haven't been relevant in the west since a very long time, but they still lie that westerners follow them; which feeds into our inferiority complex since we have been invaded countless times... "Maybe they might be our colonial arm in the West, East, South, and North?" is probably the mindset in play here. Which explains why IIT directors probably love them. IITfaggots are nothing but the most normie, MARVELbrained techies in general. I have heard that IIScs and ISRO tend to be better in this regard? Not sure though. ISKCON attracts a lot of MARVEL-brained people, and IITs provide that in spades. >>10056 >I want to learn this stuff too but there is no point reiterating my miserable lack of time. I am glad someone has similar interests out there too :) I've seen hobbyist 'coder' and they don't seem to care about the fundamentals and nitty-gritty stuff. They all want to make another new fancy webpage or video game or do 'malware reverse engineering and ethical hacking' and they don't ever even seem interested in how does a computer truly process. They just want to make something or do something, they do not want to understand why it does it. Especially since most Assembly tutorial are aimed at malware analysis and not even plain regular programming. >>10070 Heh. I feel relieved that I am not the only one who feels this way. >>10069 Good meme. >>10066 >>10071 Fuck ISKCON indeed. >>10052 I don't get what you meant by this sentence. Either ways, I am glad that my unhinged rant helped to start back this thread and general up :) This board is one of the comfiest places online I've ever been to. I wish you all a lovely day ahead :)

>RAND corporation https://archive.globalpolicy.org/empire/intervention/2008/0430rand.htm Interesting article by Chalmers Johnson. I have no idea if he's again some FBI/CIA glowie and he is not to be trusted so, I am sure someone who isn't as retarded as me might be able to pitch in. This article is however about neo-colonialism through RAND corporation and he seems to point out that it started out as a branch of the US Air Force and McConell-Douglas? Very Interesting.

आज दम आलू बनाऊँगा >>10072 I wrote this because i met a member of Razor1911 today. The discussion went similar to this post and we discussed Windows 3.1 for whatever reason. I feel good since the meeting. I actually thought I have been doxxed. I am totally rekt though. 3 nights of no sleep and non stop travel and meetings. Met many amazing people but also a post op tranny who smelt like piss, puss and shit.

>>10075 Damn, man. You met one of the very few people that I sort of consider a 'hero' and have been my primary inspiration for taking up computers as both a hobby and a career. Saying that I am jealous is an understatement. Computer science has been reduced to "that degree which makes money besides MBA". I really wish this whole craze about data science didn't exist, and heavy tinkering with operating systems and low level stuff was still cool and not turned into yet another means of nursing an LLM and Maximizing Shareholder Value™. Professional life, even in a field that I supposedly like, has been underwhelming to say the least, and now I increasingly find less and less time for what I actually like doing. I really, really wish I had pursued these instead of flunking JEE. I would have made better use of my time and ended up in the same place. I dread of being guilt-tripped into a marriage now. If you don't mind me asking, how did you end up in Germany (or wherever else)? A PhD? >>10051 You are 80% me. Holy shit.

To add to that, I'm slowly working towards a few projects that will let me die without regrets. I do not want this stuff to go to waste. Life seems to be hitting me with one thing or the other, making me drop everything to deal with it, and then having to context-switch back to my work, which I'm already poor at doing. Being tired and exhausted doesn't help either. At least I can find comfort in the needle moving forward, however little it may be. Got a bit sentimental. Sorry.

*by "work" I meant the project stuff. Resetting my mind to get back to it is the hard part.

>>10077 Relatable. Same for me. Last few weeks have been non stop pain and mishaps

I am the kind of tired where i feel nothing. Puked acid. Still busy times ahead. Slept 10 hours straight then working again.

>>10077 Same. Situation. Utterly spent. Using paper to manage context switching as i always do. My ram is low, so i use paper to store context and details. There was a fire near my flat. My stuffs fine but the smoke did enter and the air filters and heaters are fucked. So yet another night in a hotel.

>>10072 What is the painting ? > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktZy3h_Pq5E&list=RDktZy3h_Pq5E&start_radio=1 Nice album, ASMR feels > Maybe it reflects in my thought processes too? I like it. Rare to see original style of writing. And it is more entertaining than just dry writing as is mine. > I am not learning it to build a resume or 'UpSkIlLiNG'. Yeah if you were then GPU's would have been the natural choices. Those jobs pay insanely well, making senior researchers look like beggars in comparison. > my memory is shaky I struggle with deciding on how much to remember of what I have learnt. For example, I have forgotten many basic mathematics processes and theorams. If you asked me to do a square root on paper, it would be tough for me. My mentor used to say that I should only learn as needed and make good notes when I do. My math and physics revision is still pending. AS for hobby coding, I would stick to a high level modern language, just to interpret my ideas into a proper project. I do still most of my work in command line though, so BASH is still very much used. > I should see to get a provider in the future...I wonder what newsgroups are they the most active on? I wouldn't know. But I do know the old warez people are still there. > I don't see any benefit by taking Israel's side They do give us tech that we used against Pakistan. At the same time, they are now funding problems in Sri Lanka. The Yahooodi homeland state is different from the अमरीकी यहूद , one hates us, the other see's us as a necessary ally to establish new trading routes (IMEC). One Rand I already shared one book , I can recommend this "The Bomb, The Bank, The Mullah and The Poppies" By Iqbal Chand Malhotra. > more licking the boots and licking their arses? Yeah there is no point to it. BJP cannot save its cadre, let alone let people benefit from them. Ambani's are pissed off with BJP due to this. But BJP put them back in line. > Sanjay Dixit I've noticed Very smart man IRL. I wish I had his Sanskrit knowledge. He is right on many things too. But the problem with source based KNOWERS is, their knowledge is as good as the source itself. In many cases, the source itself is wrong, biased or compromised. And Sanjay ji's sources are other babu's. > has become part of the very mainstream culture it once meant to oppose My tip is, never take the mainstream seriously. Did we discuss barbell theory on another instance of InCh ? > Picrel So a meme version revision of barbell theory, you are better off taking extremist stands than being a midwit, who does not get full rewards of being right and neither the lessons of fully being wrong. > I am not a Nick Land fan. I too want to start with our old Dharmic stuff and learn how it really is without all those Aunty-isms, weird Sad guru worship (involves IIT ISKCON 'brahmacharis', performative people on Twatter, Krishna fangirls, Kulcha warriors, and Tharki uncles who will repost and thirst after even the most medicre white women if they happen to perform Hinduism; double bonus if said women are Easter European and her husband is Indian.) Such people are noise. Filter them. Ignore them. Remove them from your vision and attention. Normiedom is cancer of the soul. But it also a good mask to hide.

>>9459 >>10072 > ISKCON also markets themselves very well. They haven't been relevant in the west since a very long time, but they still lie that westerners follow them; which feeds into our inferiority complex since we have been invaded countless times... "Maybe they might be our colonial arm in the West, East, South, and North?" is probably the mindset in play here. Which explains why IIT directors probably love them. IITfaggots are nothing but the most normie, MARVELbrained techies in general. You nailed IIT'ians. They haven't been good in a very long while. Now a Manipal/BITS grad earns equivalent of IIT'ian. I can say a lot on this, but it is pointless. >>10076 https://demozoo.org/music/370939/ The meeting was very random. We hang in similar circles and I have made some contributions to FOSS. So common friend introduced us and we had a lot in common. Insanely good time discussing old malware. > I really wish this whole craze about data science didn't exist I get it. Though I would think AI would replace most excel cunts pretending to be scientists. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALPOwJlOj1k > Professional life, even in a field that I supposedly like, has been underwhelming to say the least, and now I increasingly find less and less time for what I actually like doing. This happened to me during the end of my PhD. And I sort of withdrew from the rat race. Reduced my expenses and decided to pursue things I enjoy. Results have been mixed, but that is another topic. > Marriage Take control of whom you marry. And do marry. it is good if you find the right grill. > If you don't mind me asking, how did you end up in Germany (or wherever else)? A PhD? < Btech (India) - > Stressful but core industry job - Met German consultant - Recommended to a job in Germany - Quit job for Mtech (in Germany) - Mtech turned into PhD - Finished publications but did not give final defence. Withdrew from PhD - Took up meme job to spend time on doing things I like - Fix health etc.

>>10095 Are you married? What's it like?

>>10096 It is good and strange. I do well alone, so companionship is comforting and confusing. My wife is like me. Hates modernity, into redpilled stuff etc. She is also into Hinduism, despite not being Indian. We did dhanteras together. But being with her I had to change my manly habits, be more clean and adopt my habits to hers. She also adopted to many of mine, food included. We still disagree on few things. She is a night person, I am a morning person. My parents are the kinds of boomers you guys complaint about. Needless to say they are not happy about our "love marriage". My wife is not rude to them. But she does not get the Indian culture of "respecting elders means agree with whatever bullshit they say". So though there are no over clashes, there are disagreements. They tell my wife they are open minded and modern. But in the next sentence, tell her not to wear shorts in July heat. Now we are considering shifting to India or elsewhere. Parents make that discussion sour, since then they cannot flex on others with the NRI bs. In comparison her parents have been very nice and kind to me.

Happy Dipawali to all of you. Burst crackers and enjoy yourselves. Have a prosperous year ahead.

>>10097 Sounds like you lucked out anon. Can't really fathom finding a wife like that within Indian ethnicities. I have multiple personal experiences with how bad marriages can get so the whole thing leaves a very sour taste in my mouth. Combine that with my general tendency of being annoyed by the company of others and being the happiest when keeping to myself, it seems like a very uphill battle. I know being alone is not sustainable, but some of the happiest moments in my life have been when I was soliatarily working away on something or just went out visiting places on a whim and occassionally talking to strangers. I suppose I'll try giving it a shot, but I don't have high hopes for it.

>>10099 I used to be you anon. I was smart and fit enough to pull it too. Used to fight back bullies physically, used to do well in exams etc. As I got older, I saw a good team of less than average people do well. Teamwork when well done is excellent. But it is not easy to find. Indians have the crab eats crab mentality. I used to see grills in my class as competition and they say me as competition. There was no attraction. I used to be so dumb The basic human purpose is a good goal. If you will not pursue that, then use the Brahmacharya to do something no one can. Ultimately, no answer is correct. A single fag with purpose is better than a marriage for show. A good marriage is better than a meme meaningless career etc. Sharing cringe to make the point https://youtu.be/gJZyZBv00ig

>>9459 There are people born with good innate skills and they will succeed no matter what. But beyond that, training is what makes a difference. I have put fucking idiots (but they had good intentions and hard working) through good training in my field and they are now doing well. My mentor did the same for me. I was well below his level (his level was very high, now he works alone) and he taught me a lot. Changed me entirely as a person. A lot of you guys are smart, but in situations that do not really benefit you. Try to find people to work under who can actually help you grow.

>>10104 I guess what I am trying to say is, with correct facilities and training, Indians will be world class in research and technology.

>>10104 Trying to find a mentor for all my life. For some reason people tend get their work done, and leave. Any question meets with "find it yourself", which is nice but your existence is meaningless to me other than I have to keep a mandatory supervisor above my head.

My dad asking me to join any "religious community" like RSS, iskcon et. al. According to him, it is becoming difficult to survive in India without being part of one the hive minds. I can't, their ideology, their act of breaking rules to get their stuff done, bribery, corruption is everything I don't stand for. But on the other hand he's right. I've seen people connected to these groups getting basically raised privileges. I just don't know if I can live being like that. They go against everything good my religion has taught me.

>>10105 We need to clean the corruption. Finding never reaches the scholar that needs it. In my uni, humanity gets more funding than experimental physicists all because humanity research is focused on agenda the top dogs wanna push.

>>10118 This happens everywhere. Science and Engineers work. Humanities people lead. Maybe AI will change that. >>10117 RSS is good for discipline. Waking up early, learning to use lathi etc. Benefits idk, but they have a good network. > ISCON Shortcut to get molested/raped in the arse. Networking to achieve common goal is nice.

>>10118 Story of my life. My project got shutdown so some faggot bitch cunt whore could write about social effects of climate change on opga booga tribe

Had 4 old laptops. Two i got for free. Both work. The old hp's 1 is from 2007. Heavy and noisy but good machine. Hdd is too old and motherboard almost dead. Feels sad to let it go. Other one has a good ssd. But else the machine is slow. Feels sad. Selling all 4 tomorrow.

People should leave this kid alone. He got cocky after getting to the chair. Of course he will be an internet outrage meme for another week or so until everyone moves on but even that is being too harsh on the kid, He is 10. people act as though they as individuals were the epitome of maturity at 10 years old. I hate how every little insignificant thing becomes a huge sensation these days. It was still tolerable when randos kept spewing stupid comments about him with incorrect grammar, but then that idiot Dhruv Rathee had to make a sensationalist video about him with his face in the thumbnail and millions of views. Let him live it down. He will probably have people recognizing him, his schoolmates giving him shit. I hate internet now. I liked internet when there were fewer normals here, i browsed the 'net to get away from them. See, it was him today, it could be me or you tomorrow, being famous for no reason. maybe you had a small scuffle on the street and someone decided to record it, and suddenly the clip of the moment that you were at your worst is now a sensation. >>10131 Emotional attachment is hard to let go, but trust me it is better to let go. It is not likely that you will miss it. Although I agree there is a charm in old laptops. Business laptops from around 2010 had so many ports it's easy to lose count. For things that I don't even know existed.

>>10136 > Cocky kid He is a kid. Kids are not emotionally developed. So he did nothing wrong. Also fuck Amitabh. He and any other actors, are dancing monkeys for our entertainment. They don't deserve respect. https://www.youtube.com/shorts/B-Ze4WbJBv0 > Emotional attachment Yeah. The laptops and few other things. Had good times with these machines. Now time to let go. I will miss my bicycle the most.

Had insane few weeks. Somethings that I will only be able to talk about later. Drank a fuck ton of rum last night. Very tumultuous time in my life. Coming to India feels like career suicide right now. I am families cash cow. So cash stopping is annoying for them. Sending a fair bit of my hardware and books home. Too many confused thoughts now.

>>10136 Sanity is in ignoring mainstream pipeline of shit