Welcome back class! Previously I discussed abusing a vampires blood pool to give your pet near infinite orgasms at the low price of a little bit of mindbreaking. Today I'll be talking about the best kind of vampire dildos to procure! They come in many different breeds but today we'll be covering the most common types and the unique advantages and disadvantages to owning them.
Brujah- Pronounced brew-ha, these feisty little girls are absolutely PERFECT for all you dombreakers out there.They love a good "fight" and boast some of the best skills for the bedroom. Celerity provides a substantial increase to their speed and lets them pound away like little jackhammers. This is especially pleasurable combined with the strength boosting potence! Make sure your bed frame is reinforced and you've got repairmen on speed dial! All this combined tends to tucker the brats out pretty quick though which leaves them terminal quickshots... Not that they'd admit it.
Gangrel- For those craving something a little closer to home. All the bad temper of the brujah with a more animalistic tint. They lack both the speed of celerity and the power of potence but with fortitude they'll be able to handle even the most hip-cracking amazon position with only a LITTLE bit of crying! Their claim to fame is the protean abiltiy which lets them alter their body into more animalistic shapes...Need I say more? Knots, flares, and spirals oh my!
Malkavian- These girls might have a few screws loose but that doesn't mean you can't knock a few more! They're far weaker physically than the two discussed previously but with auspex they'll know ALL your weakspots.. And maybe a few more you don't know about yourself! Combined with obfuscate and you can use your vampiric dildo whenever and wherever! On the train, at the mall, in the movies... Just so long as you don't go hard enough to break their concentration! Then it might be a little hard to explain to the human authorities. Couldn't have happened to me!
Nosferatu- This ones for the subs out there who get their rocks off to getting plowed by an ugly little gremlin. While being ugly is what makes them most notable they do pack a womb punch with potence furthering their ability to dominate you and with obfuscate backing it up you'll never know when your tiny terror is going to scrape your guts with that bent, disgusting, warty riddled meat slab!
Toreador- Love is in the air! These sappy little suckers are the only kind of vampire who actually still like sex so you won't even HAVE to rape them! (You still should though). Being the emotional types they're both big cry babies and big cuddlers so they're an excellent choice regardless of your disposition. It's not all ooey gooey stuff either as between auspex and celerity they're more than capable of backing up that emotional prowess with a sexual one too.
Tremere- Alas, I've little to say about the not-so-humble tremere. Their talents lay outside the bedroom as their particular brand of magic has no value there... They do possess auspex and dominate however, for those who find a thrill in giving up control to their dildo. They're notable for being essentially slaved to their sires and their sires sires through the pyramid however so freeing them from that bondage would likely leave them very grateful for those consensual fans! There's also some kinky potential amongst people fond of certain three letter acronyms for exactly HOW they shatter those bonds.
Ventrue- We finally end with the paper tiger extraordinaire. Your classic noble. Your rich bitch. Born into privilege, usually in both life and unlife they style themselves as the de-facto rulers of all vampires... Only they can't really back that up with more than money. While possessing poor physical attributes they nonetheless wield the fortitude discipline which makes sure they wont break before your bed does! But that's not why you fuck a ventrue, you do it because they'll HATE it. To do something as mortal as sex, with something as lowly as a wolf? These bloodsuckers can't even drink non-human blood without vomiting it back up so you can imagine their sheer disgust on their face once the panties drop. All the better to slather with drool and lipstick, no?