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"Watching Initial D is basically track time right?"

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ITT: We pretend to be Jalopnik Anonymous 08/03/2015 (Mon) 22:01:07 Id: 9c1943 No. 5664
>Self-Driving cars are the future!
>why do you need a gasguzzling v8… High torque… Beautifully.revving… 70's mustan- I can't do it. I can't fucking do it.
>we love manual transmissions but it's time for them to die >Porsche needs to make crossovers in order to make more 911s (conveniently ignoring that the 911 is most profitable car per unit in vw group) >hydrogen cars are retarded and elon musk totally didnt pay us to say this as if it's fact
>crossovers are just tall wagons guise
>dual clutch transmissions may be slower on non sequential gearchanges, maintenance intensive, heavier, and deemphasizing of driver skill, but we are contractually obligated to tell you that they are superior to manual transmissions. >crossovers have more ground clearance (ignore that the front and rear bumpers go so low that the approach angles are shit and that they suck dick off road)
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NICE PRICE OR CRACK PIPE >198x Civic >Unmodified, aside from JDM stickers >Cable tie on the ground, shows classicness >Authentic patina, all original >Ideal first time LeMons entrant >Almost a Miata, the undisputed king of cars The price? $14,888.
>>5666 >Mustang II muh nigra >its alright that you cant get a V8 American sedan outside of boring-Chrysler, V6 is good right? right?
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>be Patrick George >be at Chevy PR showcasing >be unable to talk and drive at the same time >crash 2016 Camaro >get super butthurt when they ask me to leave >write a salty post hating on said Camaro
>>5672 >Mustang II I would think it's more likely he was referring to the second gen mustang based on the torino platform versus the mustang II >>5673 just read that story (dw, archived) and wow, how the fuck do you crash when you're in a caravan of cars and understeer like a bitch on a track like belle isle? The first time I ever drove an a serious event on a track was at limerock park (which has limited to no run off) and not even the women who were first time fucked up as badly as patrick george.
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You faggots better be using adblock
Don't boycott jalopnik because of gamergate, boycott them because they're the jezebel of the car hobby. They claim to be in support of auto enthusiasts, but they're paid shills for the industry that trots out half automated hybrid crossovers.
I now giggle a little bit inside every time I see or hear the word "Jalopnik" because of this video https://youtu.be/wGnMVijx5GE?t=5m4s
>>5680 He's gotten too friendly with those assholes and the /drive people. He now just parrots whatever bs matt Farah hyperbolizes to extreme.
>>5675 >torino platform the 1971-3 mustangs are stretched versions of the previous years, not on a different platform, and still part of the first gen.
>>5684 You learn something every day. thanks stranger.
You know who needs his own show on TV? Chris Harris. Instead of Chris Evans, why not Chris Harris? Chris Harris is the best driver of supercars out of everyone. Clarkson, Hammond and May are hacks compared to him, and ought to move over. I wish Chris Harris could drive my car for me. I want a lunch with Chris Harris. Chris Harris. Chris Harris. Chris Harris. Chris Harris. >Chris Harris. Did I mention Chris Harris yet?
>>5688 I don't think you mentioned chris harris enough
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Desecrating a classic Lancia for some shitty Pixels tie-in…. that's a paddlin'
>>5716 That was an ugly ass car to begin with. I, for one, and glad it's ded.
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>Hi I am a faggot named Tavarish >I buy cars that people have absolutely destroyed then spend as little money as possible to hide this fact >I then turn around and sell them to unsuspecting members of the public to turn a nice profit. >Don't you want to be like me kids? Aren't I cool?
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Hey guys, I took my IMPORTED Nissan Skyline GT-R to a Nissan dealership to get fixed and told them it was a 2010 GT-R. LOL aren't I hilarious. Check out my videos of people reacting to my RHD Imported Nissan Skyline GT-R R32 aren't I so hilarious guys pay attention to me. Haha in this video I took my Hummer H1 and tried to sell it at CarMax isn't that so random and funny? LOL. Lol these haters are just jealous of my Imported JDM RHD Legally Complied Nissan Skyline GT-R R32.
>>6291 >Hm, people reacted normally to my soopr special IMPORTED GT-R… >I know! I'll remove the video footage, and pretend someone loved it!
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Hi there, I'm Stef Schrader, and today I put my $5 Winnie The Pooh toy on the 1886 Benz Patent-Motorwa- what do you mean I can't!? It's a Jalopnik tradition! Get your hands off me you misogynist pigs!
>>6313 I'm a woman and I constantly write about being a woman despite not wanting to be treated differently. I'm so cool. Look at how many nice cars I have that are decrepit and falling apart in my back yard. Look guys, I'm one of the boys but I'm a woman. If you don't like this you're a misogynist.
>Why You Should Sell Any Car You Have Right Now And Buy A Miata >here's a nice gif/webm we totally didn't see on the internet minutes ago and decided to repost >Can A <high end supercar> Be Used To Carry Babby Around? >here's a post from another gawker blog, probably about planes because we are men, we like manual gearboxes, hate diesels and love and things that go fast and make a lot of noise. AM I MANLY ENOUGH????????? >Miata Ownership Is Unavoidable >HERE ARE SOME CLARKSON NEWS BECAUSE TOP GEAR IS TOTALLY A LEGIT SHOW ABOUT CARS AND NOT MICHAEL BAY: WE USE CARS AS EXCUSE TO BLOW SHIT UP EDITION >The Ten Greatest Cars Of The World According To Some Arbitrary Thing. We Might Have Already Done That But This Time It's Better Than Before >here's a car we found on ebay that is somewhat interesting To be fair, it's clickbait. The point is to get the most people to click by appealing to their views. People interested in cars are interested in high end cars with loud engines and no technology inside them, so they give them that. People on the internet are drawn to little animated shit so they serve them moving images. If they calculated that the average person from their potential viewerbase is a guy in his late 20s, either driving a miata or dreaming of buying one, scolding anything that doesn't have a clutch pedal, dreaming of owning a porsche or any other desirable car with a reasonable price tag, interested in having a project car to work on and fix (without never actually doing so - it's easier to watch people on the internet do that), enjoying shows for brain dead people and capable of spending 10 minutes watching a gif that loops well, the writers will make shit that panders to this demographic. Basically any piece praising any modern tech is likely to be paid by a manufacturer, either directly or through advertising.
>>6322 jalopnik is clickbait with a mission though. they circle jerk about all that shit, but ultimately they're desperately commercial. you can see this in their constant apologism for crossovers ("they're just tall wagons guize") and the like.
>>6326 This is what I meant. Nearly everything written there is just because of whoever's paying their bills.
Hey guys, let's refer to VW's colossal cock-up as "Dieselgate", because as you all know, Gawker has an excellent track record dealing with scandals that utilise the "Gate" suffix!
>>6368 I wish this whole xgate thing would die. It's a shit lazy way of naming any movement.
THIS IS STARTING TO SOUND AWFULLY FAMILIAR
10 Best Cars of the Last Decade >10.) Miata >9.) Miata >8.) Miata >7.) Miata >6.) Miata >5.) Miata >4.) Miata >3.) Miata >2.) Miata >1.) Miata Amirte guys XDDDDD P.S. <3 Chris 'The Snake' Harris
i saved an unofficial review of a 2013 Toyota Yaris on archive.is, should I repost it here? >>6427 what about gamergate :^)
I found a thread made this week that seriously questioned, out of a choice of two possible options, whether people would own their dream car but would have to have a 1:43 version of it lodged in their rectum at all times. A disproportionate number of people picked this choice. If anyone could archive/screencap it would be much appreciated.
So what is a good site to read about car shit then? I ask because I was reading jalopnik's stuff about Datsun Z series cars and it seemed good.
>>6951 look at >5929 jalopnik is satan
>>6960 >>5929 whoops
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>>5677 Dont worry lad, I never venture without it.
GUYS! GUYS! Gawker is reoganizing. With any luck jalopnik will get the axe! Their shit is so bad they can't be making money. http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/18/business/media/gawker-politics-media.html?_r=0
>>7251 Oh yes, no better satirical politics commentator out there than Mr. Current Year himself
FUCK ORLOVE FUCK JALOPNIK AND FUCK MILLENNIALS >But only a fool would begrudge anyone driving a little drop top boring. Sure, it wasn’t the best car available, but it didn’t have to be! The roof folded away, the wind blew in your hair, and the engine buzzed away happily around you. http://jalopnik.com/only-a-fool-or-a-miscreant-hates-the-2017-boring-124-spid-1743280763 I love (hate) seeing this faggot try to write about shit he doesn't understand. It makes me so fucking buttmad to see this faggot spout off about how the original 124 was good because it was a convertible. Is this how retarded millennials are? Is this all it takes to sell them something. Because racecar, because convertible, because turbo… really are we this fucking stupid now? The original 124 sport spider was a great car because it was designed from the ground up to be better than the sum of its parts. It was designed to be Ferrari like in its dynamics but much more affordable. It was designed to be happiness in car form, a little friend whose favorite place was to be whipping through the countryside. It was all the things that modern cars have lost. This is the standard the new 124 must be judged against. The original was not twitchy for the sake of perceived sportiness. The original had a motor designed by the head of engine development for Ferrari, it was not compromised for the sake of cost. The original was incredibly easy for the home mechanic to maintain. FUCK GOD DAMNED 20 FUCKING 15 WHERE BRAIN DAMAGE IS THE NEW NORMAL.
>>7268 A good looking boring. Wow. It's a good thing my friends don't hold me to bets or I would have to eat my shoes right now.
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>>7282 >boring I THOUGHT BO FIXED THIS donk
>>7283 Well if this gets released it may just be an unjustified criticism. I'm still shocked. At least we can take solace in the fact that it'll be overpriced.
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*sigh*
>>5718 I'll be glad when you're ded.
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Whenever you begin to doubt your personal tastes, just remember you're not eagerly waiting for pure, fermented shit to exit Chris Evans' rectum. THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT ARE ACTUALLY HYPE FOR FLOP GEAR
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>>8450 this one's not attaching to the main post for some reason
>>8450 Are there people who actually like Chris Evans and BBC Radio hosts? His only claim to car fame is a collection of white Ferrari's & one black Ferrari that is one of those rare models that goes in the tens of millions of dollars these days.
>>8450 Look at them. Look at them and laugh. >>8453 It would appear so, yes.
>>8454 I mean people who aren't fanboys of the show just praying he'll be fine. What was his appeal before this?
>>5664 >get to drive an e30 on a track, >manage to break two e30 at once
>pretend to be Jalopnik It's hard to pretend to lose $140 million. How about we instead ask what its new owner would ask: What would a REAL AMERICAN drive, BROTHER?
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Gee whiz, I sure wonder if a certain car company might be providing Jalopnik with a little financial support these past few weeks
>>8666 Just thought I'd tell you that since you made that screencap they've made FIVE more articles about the fucking Tesla Model 3, all of them today though not consecutively It's fucking ridiculous. How many articles do you need about one car in such a short space of time? >>8559 OH YEAH
>>8666 That's blatant since there wasn't so much anticipation for a Tesla before.
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>>5673 hue
>>5673 > I don't get how Chris Harris does it He doesn't.
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>>8701 I'd totally destroy Sabine Schmitz's Nurburgring as we both narrated the entire thing. Hasn't ever been a real looker, but I bet she gives mindblowing footjobs from working those pedals.
>>8450 what boggles my mind is that there are also too many people hype for amazon gear TG has been stale for 5 years
>Watch this exciting footage of a Fiesta ST break a new record on the Burgerkingring!
>>8741 WELCOME TO TWENTY FUCKING SIXTEEN WHERE SPORT CAR JOURNALISTS CAN BE AFRAID OF WHAT THEYRE TRYING TO REPORT JUST FUCK MY FUCKING SHIT UP. FUCK
>>8741 I really hope I'm not the only one who feels instinctive revulsion at the sight and sound of insecure men who have no sense of self worth. Please tell me I'm not alone
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>>8754 No. You're not. Beta nu-males fucking disgust me. I'm not saying every guy has to be a full blown alpha top dog but jesus fucking christ.
>>8741 >How to survive your first track day Holy shit it's a car and you're on a circuit, just pay attention to shit around you, you're not facing a god damn lion out there.
>>8741 >>8754 >>8766 If it's any consolation, gawker is completely fucked and won't be in business this time next year
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In case you didn't notice, they have gone fully designated shitting streets.
>>5670 Whoever writes one of these articles probably just uses it to advertise their friend's car. Anyone can become desperate to sell when the only calls they get on their Craigslist ad are from pajeets who want them to send a $500 MoneyPak code on a fake Paypal website.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXJzt4bRWR8 >>8701 Like this? Sabine Schmitz is way overrated tbh.
>This is why non-crossovers are sexist
>>15174 >this is why anything more than 4 cylinders is sexist
Liquid fuels damage painted nails, which makes them sexist and homophobic.


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