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King of Shitposting

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RAM 12/25 Christmas Miracle Edition Boliever 12/25/2017 (Mon) 09:34:29 Id: 40cb20 No. 90371
WWE Raw preview, Dec. 25, 2017: John Cena returns to deck the halls on a special Christmas Raw Free agent John Cena returns to WWE for the first time since Survivor Series on a LIVE Christmas Raw. How will The Cenation Leader deal with Team Red’s most notorious Grinches? Don’t miss any of the holiday action as Raw airs commercial-free for the first hour, beginning at 8/7 C on USA Network! >John Cena returns Cena Claus is coming to town! Indeed, after fighting for SmackDown LIVE at Survivor Series, John Cena returns to Team Red for a special Christmas celebration in Chicago, the city in which he made his WWE debut against Kurt Angle back in 2002. Given his history in the Windy City, the 16-time World Champion will no doubt make this a Christmas to remember. What holiday cheer does the “Ferdinand” star have in store? >inb4 jobbing to roman again <The Women’s division prepares to make history Who fucking cares? >Who will gain momentum en route to a battle with The Beast? After Raw General Manager Kurt Angle announced last Monday that Universal Champion Brock Lesnar will defend his title against both Braun Strowman and Kane in a Triple Threat Match at the Royal Rumble event before running away, The Beast Incarnate laid out both challengers — but neither stayed down for long. Both formidable challengers will be looking for a strong close to 2017 as they prepare to take on The Conqueror. Who will face the wrath of The Monster Among Men and The Big Red Machine on Raw? >How will Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins get payback for Dean Ambrose? Samoa Joe’s assault in the trainer’s room exacerbated Dean Ambrose’s arm injury, requiring The Lunatic Fringe to undergo surgery to repair the damage. Both Seth Rollins and Intercontinental Champion Roman Reigns clearly want a piece of The Samoan Submission Machine after he put their Shield brother on the shelf. Who will get their hands on Joe first? >Who else will declare for the Men’s Royal Rumble Match? Elias was the first Superstar to announce his participation in the 2018 Men’s Royal Rumble Match, leaving 29 spots open in the over-the-top-rope melee. Will more Superstars throw their names in the hat for a World Championship opportunity on The Grandest Stage of Them All at WrestleMania 34? Don’t miss a special Christmas edition of Raw — with the first hour commercial-free — live at 8/7 C on USA Network!
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APOLOGIZE WOO
>with the first hour commercial-free I'm sure there will be no awkward product placement here. >90380 What kind of faggot wouldn't pick galak's powerkino presentation?
>>90380 >all of the 52% is the same guy kek
>>90386 Everyone loves BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOley brother HH
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Son of a bitch BO, I wish I was next door to ya! I'd come over and beat the hell out of ya, just for the hell of it.
>>90388 >getting this worked
>>90380 http://www.wwe.com/polls/superstar-you-want-to-meet-under-mistletoe Guess who wins. Guess who isnt even an option.
Merry Christmas, fagits. >>90371 Saving that rare festive jhon.
>>90389 Her names not fucking "booley" you dumb shit
>>90390 >no Dana Brooke
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>USA is playing some capeshit before RAM >not a christmas themed movie >nothing related to today >but fucking capeshit What a terrible network.
oh hi jhon
JOAN SEEEEEEEEEEEEE NUHHHHH Is Jojo drunk?
Its Christmastime in Hollis Queens, momma's cookin chicken and n…no throat shots tonite, r…rite lads?
>>90394 She's still the cutest, and theres not a god damn thing you can do about that.
>it's Christmas Day >they're still saying the wrong thing
>>90400 >Marking out at irl nerdfilters
>it takes Big Match Jhon to get the correct saying out there >John Cena shitposted against Roman and said Merry Christmas >John Cena started a Merry Christmas chant I-is he going over?
>Going to a fake fighting performance in the day of our lord and savior jesus christ
>Jhon is going to bury poor elias because he noticed he was getting too popular It's not fair.
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>CM Punk chants >Elias actually calls him out Vince must be furious right now.
CM PUKE
jhon is literally about to steal the spotlight
>>90403 Shitposting on a vietnamese cat >cooking fan forum on the day of our Jeebus >taking the moral high ground
>>90403 >Being a christcuck
>Cean opening segment >Actually good Thank you based elias and fuck you chicago, let go of two minute phil already.
>Jhon trying to put the murder capital of the world over >Y-you're being a jerk Elias!
God tier segment this far.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
This segment was like banging your head on a wall only to find the wall is hollow and there's money inside.
Is this really live or pre-taped?
>>90415 Live.
>Taima strim has ads >Canada
>Canadian stream has ads
>>90416 >actually making wrestlers and the entire production crew work on Christmas Day away from their families This has to be a Vince move. Considering his entire family would be there anyway.
>>90417 >>90418 >watching streams >not cable
>>90420 I'm not 40 years old
>Booker bookering out in support of Elias >Cole talks over him
>>90420 >Actually paying for cable I'm not american anyway
>>90421 Neither am I. If I could get USA Network or WWE on antenna I wouldn't use cable either, not like anything else on TV is any good. >implying WWE is usually good
>first hour commercial free >the entirety of it is going to be Elias vs Cena At least the match is good.
>Cenas bald spot
>Elias steals Seff's shitty finisher
>>90427 THE KNEE!!!!!!!
>John Cena is RIDING Elias
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>Booker completely BTFOing Corey again
THIS IS BORING
>Five Moves of Doom >to conclude a match that was entirely stalling What a throwback.
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THIS IS GORING
Thanks cean, elias really needed to lose to the 5 moves of doom before you leave to film another bomb.
https://twitter.com/hideoitami/status/945421548600602629
>>90390 >No Bo, No Dana
>The Shield reunites >but Seff can't team with Roman for a match >for some reason >has to match with Jordan Jason FIVE YEARS
>>90438 The big dawg is the real star damnit
HEY GUYS THE SHIELD IS BACK LOOK VINCE, THE FANS ARE CHEERING ROMAN NOW NOW LET'S NOT DO ANYTHING WITH THE SHIELD AND KEEP PUSHING ROMAN IN SINGLES
>>90438 The shill reunion was such a bust its incredible.
I wonder if they never show "THE" Brian Kendrick/his entrance on TV because they'd have to pay licensing fees for his non-CheapFO$/Jim Johnston theme.
>>90436 >wanting to kiss Bo
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>that theme
Hitami makes me sad every time I see him.
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>Japans sports entertainment scene
>>90443 not wanting to give thumbs up and get life advice from bo.
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>>90447 That's not what you do under the missiletoe.
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>>90448 >Missiletoe me like one of your french girls bo
Respectful Japanese crowd
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HE DID THE GTS COREY SAID HIDEO CREATED THE MOVE
The crowd doesnt even care enough to cm punk chant. This is sad to watch.
>Did a shoot GTS
>Ywn be bullied by the entire womens division
>sneaking in a 205 Live segment and a MUH WYMYN'S MINI ROYAL RUMBLE promo package into the commercial-free hour instead of putting on big matches to capitalize on it >putting Booley in the package instead of the good looking women
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>Bo and Curtis in festive outfits
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Fuck you Booley and botcha, that was GOLD.
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I'VE ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY
>>90441 Five. Five years. Five years footlong.
She's pure unlike queen of the leaks paige
>>90460 Pure shit.
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>>90460 >pure <Trash
>womanhandling "MANHANDLING" ISN'T A GENDERED TERM COREY YOU FUCKING FAGGOT I knew he was a fucking numale.
YOU HEAR THOSE |3AYLEY CHANTS YOU FUCKERS
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>>90463 >Cory confirmed Quimblasted
BACKGROUND IN JEWDOUGH
>Sonya will never stiff you
Wew, so much booing.
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THOSE CHANTS AND CHEERS DONT SOUND LIKE BOOS TO ME YOU FUCKERS
DENIED BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOley BTFO
>Booley jobs to a DDT
>>90419 NFL makes teams play on Thanksgiving and Christmas.
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>This cum breath pinned BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOley It just ain't right
>>90455 >>90472 >Let's push Booley for these WYMNS EVENTZ <Now let's make her lose in every match she has to wrestle in, but let her partners get wins in other team matches GENIUS, VINCE! This is will make everyone love Booley!
>>90473 Who cares? wrSPORTS ENTERTAINERS™ are more important.
>>90476 And football players get a shit load of money playing on those days while they get to do whatever they want, so fuck them.
>>90477 (checked) Plus, they're all niggers.
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>Nickelback theme
>When Itami nails you in the fuckin nose and it hurts so much you say fuck kayfabe.
https://twitter.com/SCOTTHALLNWO/status/439360017024577536
>too busy shitposting and bullying booleyfag to take a shit during the boring match >miss the opening/promo of this match in the restroom >at least get to catch the match I really hope this leads to a Heath Slater and Rhyno push.
>>90481 This is actually really sad.
>>90482 >He calls that "bullying" It's just you complaining I like someone you don't you childish motherfucker you
>Dont you have mayor stuff to do? Tippity top toppest of keks.
>>90483 The smarks screeching, or people still bolieving Chris did it?
>>90484 >Curt Hawkins Another boring stupid squash match, or will he get a push like HS/R are? >WHAT chants SHUT THE FUCK UP
>Finn Balor HOW THE FUCK DOES FINN POSSIBLY NEED ANOTHER SUPERBOOST PUSH WITH A HAWKINS SQUASH MATCH HE'S ALREADY AT THE TOP OF THE FUCKING LADDER GOD FUCKING DAMMIT
>>90486 um the fact that Hall says he lost a friend?
>>90488 HE'S NOT OVER ACHOO ACHOO ACHOO
>>90488 Actually Vince squashed him with KANE, and he was stuck messing around with the fucking miztourage.
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>the closest Curt will ever get to a push is in vidya sims in a rivalry with a meme character
>>90492 and that he still considers him his friend.
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>tfw drove drunk and then my car exploded and threw me through the windshield at 30 MPH and landed in the back of a police car
>>90495 >Drinking in 2018
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>>90495 >Not accepting miz as your lord and (Drunk Driving) savior
>>90496 >2017 was 30 years ago
This Woken shit has already jumped the shark.
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>Bo and Axel doing Mizmas carols and messing with Goldust is the highlight of the show
Dana looking like a pornstar
Bray actually gets his intro shown on TV today, very unusual.
>>90502 When does she not?
PERSONAL GAY
>>90504 >t. Booleyfag
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>>90504 Yeah but that secretary shit really does it, especially with her surrounded by 2 black guys
>>90506 What?
AMBUSH DELETION
<no match <autistic Dunn transition >HARDY chants during The Bar segment >Cesaro's clearly shitposting by keeping his mouthguard in during promos
>skipping Bray v BROKEN Matt fight in favor of 205 Live probably doing a repeat of the completely wasted Bullet Club vs whoever halloween gimmick match
>>90510 >Bar and Bo segments saves a rubish raw <JJ being buried this hard in a promo >Making a one armed dean doll
Don't worry, Jhon went back in time to punish Vince for this booking.
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You'd think by this point they'd have Enzo update his intro to mention his "Zo Train" team when they come out with him like he had that extra part with Cass.
>"AND THIS, IS THE ZO TRAIN, AND THEY'RE [something intended to be intimidating or good], AND YOU CAN'T TEACH THAT" Something like that.
>>90516 You don't have [FIVE YEARS] experience
>DID YOU SEE THAT? What, Cole, the thing the 205 roster does every single match? >they actually have fucking pubg ads now >>90514
>it's a "street fight" a.k.a. "extreme rules" a.k.a. "hardcore >they've done ONE tree shot, ONE cookie sheet, TWO stick hits, and a guy threw away a present that could be a weapon >finishes on a normal vanilla move after 5 minutes of match time Modern day WWE really fucking sucks with weapon matches, like only NXT and New Gay/Usos in HIAC are capable and willing to put the effort in to make it worth watching.
>enzo gets cockblocked in under the missiletow by alexa
>Already getting booed >Only roasties screaming for him
>Ramen is from the worst state in the US makes sense
>trying to recreate the old claymation animation style for an ad <using CGI for it because you're too cheap and lazy to actually do the real thing
SOLD OUT
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>>90524 "SOLD OUT"
WEW Joe almost made that barricade collapse on the WWE Universe™.
>>90525 THAT SIDE OF THE ARENA IS FULL THERE ARE NO EMPTY SEATS
>DQ >no title change >FACE Roman does HEELISH DQ actions and post-match attacks
Roman Heel Turn confirmed?
>Everyone is top competition >Curt Hawkins is top competition
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BAH GOD HE KILLED THEM
>it's going to be another "5 minute main event because we need more boring promos and squash matches" episode
Alexa is pure fucking cringe
>>90533 or a 5 minute main event with no finish…wait that's actually smart, discount that
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AHAHAHA TIME FOR THE JEW TO DIE
Is Alexa secretly a McMahon? She sounded exactly like Stephanie during that obnoxious promo. >I'm going to win the Royar Rumbre
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>>90536 >>90534 >t. Booleyfag
BURN IT DOWN
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>>90536 >jew
>>90539 I don't give a shit >>90541 (((Kaufmann)))
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>event staff/security at the one corner Did something happen there?
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>>90542 A German last name. You're probably some Amerimongrel who thinks -stein last names are earnestly Jewish. But hey, check out this man with his stubby nose. Such a Jew.
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Everyone patting Cesaro's butt
>>90545 Prange is also a german name, yet you niggers call Rooby a Jew. You mealy-mouthed, pimple-faced cocksucker, you!
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>>90547 >Tranny
>>90545 Showing the patriarch when debating matriarchal lineage. >I dont want to bolieve but shills like you really activate my almonds
>>90547 Why are you assuming I'm someone else? And for the record, (((Tranny Jew)))t looks weird because she's American Indian.
>>90549 Are you fucking stupid? The dude is saying she's a Jew because of her last name, which she got from her father.
>>90550 >pale skinned amerindian Wrong. >>90548
>>90548 You goddamn stupid cocksucker, you! Is this all you got to do?!
>>90549 >ignoring genetics and going by (((their))) own system. You're not as free as you think.
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>>90514 Burned out Balor?
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>>90554 Ignoring half of the genetic story >Nobody's Free Mischling
>>90555 You must be from Kentucky, you inbred son of a bitch, you!
>>90558 (You)
>>90557 >Ignoring half of the genetic story I never said I did. But keep ignoring points and embarrassing yourself further.
>>90559 You got a SHITHEAD, you know that?!
Wew I've missed these threads. I missed the last two weeks trying to be a good kid because I asked Santa for (((Five Years))) of experience. Unfortunately he didn't deliver, so Santa's clearly on a heel turn. I'll be stuck shitposting here with you faggots once again. Oh well.
>>90560 >don't be mad Mischling
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>>90564 Hey lemme tell ya how I feel: Fuck you!
>>90566 Do you know what you're gonna do when you get outta your goddamn wheelchair? You're gonna fall, you son of a bitch, and I hope you do.
I don't know what's more obnoxious, "The next generation of grape" winning the tag championship out of nowhere or the Booley/Jewbyfag screeching this autistically.
>>90502 Pics? (I missed it, but it's not like I missed anything big out of Jhon trying to bury Elias). >Women's Royal Rumble Calling it now: Bellas (or at least Nikki) will be in the Rumble, and bury more than half of the roster.
The Booley and the Jewby fag aren't the same person, r-right? Remember when the Steph faggot was outed as a footfag too?
>>90570 Things pretty dry up around your house? Nothin' to do, 'sides fuck with me?
>>90571 Yes, he is.
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>>90573 I don't know whether to be happy it's only one person or be terrified that that much cancer can be concentrated into a single individual
>>90574 >>90575 You goddamn stupid cocksucker, you! Is this all you got to do?!
>>90579 >>90578 Have you got somethin' on your mind? Do you have a mind?
>>90581 What are you, some kind of clown or somethin'?
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>BREAK up american alpha >Do nothing with gable until puting him with shelton, still don't do much >JJ is angle's son, gets a push and is booed to shit >JJ wins the tag titles with seff rollens after the shield reunited
>tfw Booleyfag watches dsp and sends in cheers claiming Booley is the best woman on the roster >tfw dsp prefers asska over alexa because alexa doesn't have shit for T&A
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>>90589 gable is vanilla midget and jordan looks fuckin great, both jj and gable are about the same skill wise and promo wise, the difference is when jj does a suplex it isn't mentioned by smarks anywhere and when gable does suplex smarks are gushing themselves and crying why chad wasn't angle's son
>>90590 I don't even watch dsp you dumb shit.
>>90742 >being this in denial
>>90758 I just told you I don't watch him, you illiterate son of a bitch. DSP is about as smart as you so why would I watch him?
>>90583 I can't tell if I want to fap to her, or cringe from the lipstick and makeup
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