Oh man, too much to even begin, really. But I should refer to them as astral experiences rather than dreams. I very rarely dream anymore.

>>65 tell moar plz

Lately I've been experiencing nightmares. I live NEET life and it's been quite negative as of late. It's been about 12 hours since I've woken up but I'll try to recount. In last nights dream I was 18 years younger, I was wearing all purple and my mom and some man were driving my brother in I around in a large parking garage. I had the feeling we were going to some kind of amusement park but there was some off putting feeling about the people in the cars around us. Yesterday my mom mentioned the band "The Cars" so maybe that pushed my dream in that direction. Life is strange.

>>80 I've been astral travelling for decades. I've been all sorts of places. Have you read John Kreiter's books? I might not be as skilled and experienced as he is, but I know that dark ocean he talks about and it's sobering to realize how completely lost mankind is right now. As I grow older my "young people are clueless", my "normies are clueless" and my "mundanes are clueless" have merged into one super nihilistic clusterfuck that has paralyzed me utterly.

>>112 I've actually been reading John Kreiter's astral projection book myself. On that topic, how did you first get into APing? Was it just a natural thing for you? >tfw unenlightened youngster

>>124 It was a natural thing for me since as young as I can remember. Don't trust anyone like me who says they can teach you. I haven't walked the path in this life and I wouldn't know how to go about it. Did you know the "enlightened" thing is literal? You see a light. It changes many things, but many stay exactly the same.

>>53 I've had many but one particular event I had was that of an old woman with a shotgun appearing at the foot of my bed speaking in spanish about angels and I understood her despite the language barrier when I was half-asleep/half-awake.

Once while I meditated I felt surrounded by spirits entranced by my glowing energy body. After dispersing, one girl remained. She began talking to me in Japanese. I don’t speak Japanese, and I didn’t understand a thing. I managed to ask for her name, but I’ve since forgotten and I didn’t seen her again.

I experienced something interesting in hypnogogia last night. At first only a small fraction of my consciousness was aware of my body, but then when my consciousness more fully possessed it, the feeling was so physically palpable. I guess it was the re-entry of some level of "energy body". It definitely reminds me of all the books and diagrams I've seen that illustrate such things. Maybe if I can find and memorize an accurate one, it will help me to navigate experiences in that state. Like how Gurdjieff's "centers" are a sort of map to waking life.

>>218 >Maybe if I can find and memorize an accurate one I could not find "accurate" ones so far. The way the energy body can appear can be either symbolic (with animals people religious emblems or sigils) or super specific (with energetic circuits and channels like the human body but far more colorful). It has layers upon layers. It is like reading a book. You read a page and turn the page once you understand what is written on it then you read the next and don't understand it until you read the next page after it. Diagrams are usually manifestations of systems the authors came up with so if you find a diagram from a different system that had no relation with that tradition or way of thinking it will portray things from different angles with seemingly no relation at all. Even in daoism they say that unlocking the "inner eye" is important so you can see the different manifestations of the subtle body and once you unlock the inner eye the way the body works might appear completely different from the diagrams. But at that level there is no need for diagrams anymore because you can see what you are doing. It has so many layers and the way the energies move meet and transform within and without is truly spectacular. The more I see it myself the more I understand why it is so hard to make a simple and concise system in spirituality. The map-territory relation fallacy. Mistaking the map for the territory as they say. As I was dwelling deeper within myself I always had an urge to look at anatomy and spiritual diagrams especially after the chakra system appeared for me far more complicated than the mainstream one and as I looked into the chakra diagrams and articles I realized there is no properly agreed upon system here. Then I stopped looking at diagrams for a while but later I had an urge to look at anatomy drawings because I felt that I am working out how the energies work with relation with my nerves capillaries and muscles and I wanted to look at medical anatomy images on the web. Then my guides asked me. >Do you really want to base your understanding upon false images instead of wanting to see it for yourself? With this they did not discourage me but noted that using false images as reference or thinking that the images represent truth will just make misconceptions in my mind. It doesn't mean those diagrams are completely useless or misleading but there is a point where we must let go of them. What I am doing now is biomancy and for the sole purpose of stabilizing my psychic abilities because imbalances in the body cause imbalances in the mind which cause imbalances in the psyche and with that my whole existence becomes an >Anomalous Experience As we work with the paranormal we slowly understand how natural are these phenomenons when the conditions are met and the more I work with these anomalies the less otherworldly they feel. It just becomes a way of life like everything else. Long were the ages when mystics were a common thing the common folk revered and treasured and I wonder when can we return into an age of proper mysticism

>>219 >can be either symbolic (with animals people religious emblems or sigils) or super specific I forgot to mention plants. They are so common that I forgot to consider them anomalous at all... They can appear as roots branches and different kind of flowers petals and leaves. Most symbolic manifestations will be plants because they are the closest to the real thing. When the Buddha gave me a flower and as I took it I realized I am becoming a flower I even asked him that >Will this turn me into a plant He casually said yes. Took me a while to understand what it means and what it means to cultivate. Humans learned cultivation via planting the soil. Plants grow from the darkness of the soil and mature via the light of the sun. Spiritual cultivation is also about understanding the light and darkness surrounding us and how that makes us grow and how our growth reshapes the environment. Just had a breakthrough yesterday and I realized I forgot to mention the plants... Even Fringe Girl has energetic plants manifesting around her and I forgot to mention them. They are the most harmonic expressions of spirituality. Important to not forget them.

I had a dream last night where a contingent of aliens put 2 planets in front of the earth and said they're gonna destroy the world soon unless humanity finds the power from within to stop them. When they said power from within, my mind thought of THE ALL that's within everyone. If it matters, both planets put in front of the earth resembled the earth, but with purple land and greyish-white water; one planet was maybe 8 times bigger than the other, and the smaller one was placed directly in front of the bigger one. I recall having read about such a topic here in the past; people said that this planet will have to be destroyed in the near future, so I'm assuming that either humanity will have to use physicality-altering magic to neutralize or eliminate the NWO soon, or else this planet will have to be destroyed to prevent everyone that isn't a powerful occultist from having their free will stolen from them outright by the NWO's technology for ages to come.

>>226 Small planet is the ultima thule, which is the planet we live on now, it's a small part of the real earth which has been dimensionally twisted and locked behind a gate. From our view it's at antarctica, but in reality it's "all the way around the earth as we know it". It's the ice wall, but it appears as only a continent. Opening that gate will unite the northern small earth with the large sphere out there, the "original africa" to the south. The "out of africa" theory implies humans came from a larger geography to the south, it doesn't talk about africa which we know of. The sphere earth is a dimensional illusion created fairly recently, the exact details were discussed on /x/ a few months ago. You can try astral travelling to antarctica and you can see the gate, if you are just aware of it. Go beyond and view the large planet. Natural resources aren't limited at all, it's all fake.

>>226 >>227 As the "universe expands" theory is mainstream nowadays and yes the earth can also expand but it is more like the dimensions shift and arrange themselves in a new way. It's interesting they are sending out messages about the process. Guess it is necessary for some. >planet will have to be destroyed in the near future I would say "rearranged" like how the tectonic plates move but with larger dimensional layers. >unless humanity finds the power from within The world without their people becomes a lifeless rock and gets destroyed as a natural consequence (Those self hating retards that say the earth would be better without humans on it have zero connection with earth itself). Those who are unable to hear the calling were never really people to begin with. I don't know what they are anymore. NPCs are at least making the game playable but it seems most people are just buggy programs nowadays. But the debugging is on it's way. >my mind thought of THE ALL that's within everyone. Within and without everything and everyone. Ask the voice within maybe he will answer.

>>226 Interesting. From this dream and other stuff I’ve gathered from myself and others, I’ve come to believe that currently the incarnated souls are going to be moved over to two different universes depending on their energetic makeup. It is very much a “harvest” in a way. The Rapture seems to be the process by which our matured souls are going to be reclassified according to their nature, since cohabitation is no longer energetically possible. Your dream seems to imply it would be possible to avoid this by bypassing polarization altogether and transcending, but that is not a viable option for the bulk of humanity, is it? Moreover, it also looks like the majority of souls will end up in on planet, while a minority will make to the other. I don’t think the Earth itself will be destroyed, since the planet has its own path. I think it will just be vacated.

Reporting my last bad nightmare I mentioned in the Question Thread. This was the day after the nightmare where I spinebuster'd a vision. I was having art class in school, and the same kid from the previous nightmare starting scribbling something with a marker on my jeans, I confronted him then said to the teacher look at this motherfucker. But the confrontation was verbal, in the form of a scolding, and it had no effect. Most students laughed at me. At this point the training kicked in and I became a wizard, with cloak and all. I would go hovering in the class chanting something that sounded like "hakuna/kahuna thai/kal", while my enemies came at me like an horde, but it got the best of them. Then the enemy now was this gigantic kid with a deformed face that looked like fetal alcohol syndrome and had this insane bloodlust. I would run and fly throught the halls and use "corporeous magick" to transverse walls and to hide in corners of the ceiling. There were also a bunch of fat black shirtless guys with shaved heads and some kind of white skirt that made me think of South Asia, and they carried a machete each of them in their right hand. They also run and tried to get me. When we met we would fight each other chanting that kahuna thing. I had thus far avoided any direct attacks on my person. I was in a room when one of these shirtless dudes screamt "hes here" and the gigantic kid came rushing into the room, but I used my corporeal magic to be at the same physical space as the wall and hide there. Then I fired an attack on his back and it went through cleanly. It was over. One of the machete guys hurled himself at the body that lied on the ground and cried "master!!", another that stood beside me said "its not over yet hes still moving" and I replied "his rpm is too low. hes a dead man". But then I saw he get up and grab the machete guy as if it were a doll and started beheading him slowly and then began stiching his body into his own as some sort of healing mechanism, this was too horrid and i was feeling queasy and then i woke up. Also important to note that before entering the room I was in a labyrinthine bathroom. Bathrooms, especially public bathrooms are recurring elements of my dreams.

>>242 >labyrinthine bathroom I used to have these a lot earlier, I concluded to me they represent the physical world, where "looking for an empty toilet stall" was the same as trying to fulfill desires in the flesh. It's no different from taking a shit, no matter what desire it appears like. At one point the dreams stopped appearing, I assume when these things were less on my mind.

>>242 >Also important to note that before entering the room I was in a labyrinthine bathroom. Bathrooms, especially public bathrooms are recurring elements of my dreams. Those are interdimensional connector places. It's about cleansing. In the past humans cleansed themselves in rivers and ponds then in bathhouses and temples. Nowadays we don't have bathhouses we do not cleanse ourselves via a river or a pond nor do we go to a church for cleansing. Because of that to connect to other worlds and to other parts of our psyche we have to go through these representations. I too had these dreams in the past >>248 >they represent the physical world The way we cleanse ourselves in the physical world yes. Until we become either clean or discover our own way of cleansing ourselves it repeats from time to time. >this was too horrid and i was feeling queasy You are truly far more of a proper human than me. If this happens to me my mind goes into THIS IS A VIDEOGAME mindset and my body uses it's RULES OF NATURE reflexes and no amount of horror can distraught me. I have to slowly let go of that mindset tho. Not good for further spiritual work and it keeps me addicted to high action videogames. Also the other parts sound like regular social anxiety/childhood traumas going out of proportion because they still affect your life and you are still unable to overcome it. Some minor entities might exploit it but I would say this is forcing you to awaken by yourself. You have no choice but to fight and get rid of these fears no matter what. The way we do it depends on our nature and I am too gung-ho solving things via violence so I am slowly learning to not use it by reflex. For you this might take time until you gather your courage to face your fears. I am not saying you are fearful because you handled this situation well but if you were in that class IRL the trauma of that experience would have hurt you. After overcoming these fears no one will even dare to fuck with you. Or if they do you will be able to diffuse those situations because you don't feel helpless anymore. The fact that you were able to go into wizard mode instead of enduring silently shows you are on the good track for finding your own power.

>>248 >where "looking for an empty toilet stall" was the same as trying to fulfill desires in the flesh In these labyrinthine toilets it's more like feeling lost and trying to find something to do, rather than actually wanting to use the toilet. Most of my time spent there is trying to find the exit. If I try to use a toilet it's because other people there are staring at me and I try to act normal, but I don't wanna spend much time in these places. >>251 >Those are interdimensional connector places. I often have this feeling of "distortion" when I'm at these bathrooms. Like those poorly edited amateur movies. My thoughts will often focus on dirt, these bathrooms are often dirty or have bizarre architecture (insanely large urinals that go from ceiling to floor). They somewhat resemble liminal spaces. Some dreams involve being instructed to shower in "military style" bathrooms with no privacy, and in these I always refuse to shower and to undress before the others, I find some way to hide or to cover myself. I think these might be two different kinds of dream symbolism. The first is probably one of these interdimensional connectors you spoke of, especially because these are places I exit before getting into the "actual" dream. But the second might be something about baring oneself(?). The military style toilets have no distortion and generally play an actual part in the dreams story. >regular social anxiety/childhood traumas going out of proportion because they still affect your life and you are still unable to overcome it. Some minor entities might exploit it but I would say this is forcing you to awaken by yourself. You have no choice but to fight and get rid of these fears no matter what. I had read somewhere that ancient egyptians refused to write about bad things out of fear that they might manifest in their lifes, and used a similar approach to these sort of problems. I would try to undo by not acknowledging. I see this is not working and often leads to a build-up of bad energy.

>>254 >that ancient egyptians refused to write about bad things out of fear that they might manifest in their lifes While they were wise in some matters they were quite retarded in others. >I see this is not working and often leads to a build-up of bad energy. You came to the right conclusion. Ignoring a problem just makes it worse. Writing about your problems usually means you are working on it. And once your problem manifest you can deal with it. It is also important. Better manifest a problem in a situation when you can handle it and solve it or you might reach a point where you have no proper control over your life nor a say in the timing and way of that bad thing's manifestation. Also never avoid fear. You will have to conquer it. Fear is not the worst thing. The worst thing is usually the thing that causes the fear and you will need a clear conscience to defeat it no matter what form it takes. >I often have this feeling of "distortion" when I'm at these bathrooms. Like those poorly edited amateur movies. My thoughts will often focus on dirt, these bathrooms are often dirty or have bizarre architecture (insanely large urinals that go from ceiling to floor). Now this is new. For me they are just large places but the showers and other appliances are normal sized and not surreal fuckhuge. Probably because the moment I figure out I am in a dream I go ballistic so it tries to keep me asleep. Also mine are clean. Way too clean. The dirtiest I've seen was actually old and that is why the mural was a little brownish but not dirty. >But the second might be something about baring oneself(?). Oh that one is important. We born naked we die naked. Our energy body is naked. It can manifest symbols or clothes but it is naked. Wearing clothes actually blocks our natural energy flow. And shame. Shame is a bad reflex. You will have to get over it because it also blocks vital energy flows. I had naked dreams more than a decade ago where I noticed my zipper is down or I am in my underpants or with no pants on while talking to people and I thought >if they were not bothered by my nakedness before then they are ignoring it already. Why should I care if they don't care With that the dreams usually went into the "next chapter". I don't know if you live alone or if you have any privacy but try to get naked and feel how natural it is to be naked. If you are anxious about the way your body or a body part look try to realize that it is your shame that makes it ugly and not it's inherent ugliness. Try to accept your body because that is the first step when you can start working on it and feel it's natural energy flow. And proper energy flows heal the body. Took me time to realize the importance of it. First I realized while meditating I need to be shirtless because my upper body generates too much sweat while doing my energy work. I still had my socks and pants on because my legs were still cold. Then I realized my lotus is faulty because my socks makes my foot slip down. So I took them off. Then as my legs started to regain their energy flow I dropped my pants. Then I realized my crotch has almost the most important energy flow mechanism in the entire lotus position and it obstructed the way the energies flow. There are extremely important muscle movements in your hip area for energy work. When I meditate the room usually gets warmer once my energies stabilize. Becoming Skyclad is important and it is not about nudism but realizing that this shame is not natural and it just leads to inhibited feelings desires and ultimately perversion. Some anons said in the past that when a female entity appeared front of them naked the entity told them to not feel lust. For me it was weird. Whenever I noticed an entity naked my mind went into "spiritual mode" and lust never even appeared for me while when I was horny no entity wanted to approach me. I mean I can make them have sex with me but it feels wrong... Especially because I can manually overload my nerves for a full body orgasm and doing that makes me aware just how retarded it is... If an entity does something lewd with me it is usually just a warm up for a spiritual lesson and not a deranged sexual thing. Prudism ruined everything. It managed to create the opposite effect. Prude regions are usually the most porn addicted. They denied their own natural energies and created an unnatural perversion in it's stead.

>>254 Btw did you figure out your own dreamcheck method? Hope you are doing it. Focusing on it even while writing your posts and eating or living the day to make sure it is not a dream. Constantly dreamchecking connects parts of the subconscious and the unconscious. It forces you to question everything that is happening. Also if you made a magic sword for yourself practice holding it in your hand and swinging it while bored. It awakens the energy body and being able to pull in the energy body into the dream is important. There are dreams when our limbs don't move and learning to reactivate them is important. I remember I had dreams where my legs didn't work so I started to run and jump with my hands. Nightmares subside once you become the scariest part of it.

>>254 >In these labyrinthine toilets it's more like feeling lost and trying to find something to do, rather than actually wanting to use the toilet. Most of my time spent there is trying to find the exit. If I try to use a toilet it's because other people there are staring at me and I try to act normal For me it used to be having a strong urge to use the toilet, but there are always some problems with them. The stall door can't be locked, I enter it but the toilet is not installed (just a hole in the floor), I keep walking and think I'll find one but they're all broken or locked in some way. During a session with Sepheranz/Illivryn she said these places are hell, and it's the same experience as being down there. Waking up from the dream means still being in hell and having to solve the problem later, during the day or week. If the situation is solved in the dream, it's solved and was like a test. I mentioned other specific dreams to her, like being naked with only a towel in a mall and looking for a pool that was supposed to be there. This dream ended when I actually found my way to the roof and there was a pool and flower pots with flowers. Illivryn said this means I passed the test. >these bathrooms are often dirty or have bizarre architecture (insanely large urinals that go from ceiling to floor). They somewhat resemble liminal spaces I've tended to see the dirt but feel that it's "comfy" somehow, which I suppose means that there are dirty things I like which I don't see that they are dirty while awake. I also used to have dreams of being in large swimming hall mazes, sometimes there would be toilets in there too, as if we were swimming in the sewage water, but it looks blue and fresh, maybe to say that I have no idea that it's actually dirty and see it as clean. I do recall one time (I think this was the last time I had such a dream) where I said "fuck it" to myself and starting peeing into the water of the swimming hall (standing above the pool). A woman came in and looked at me but I felt nothing and didn't care. I think this may have been how I was meant to pass the test.

>>259 >she said these places are hell Ultimately Hell is about cleansing but Purgatory is the place that is known for cleansing while Hell is the one known for eternal damnation/no escape kind of thing. I remember some supersized bathrooms with broken bidets but there were just so many it didn't matter that some are broken. I thought >This place is so big and so empty some broken appliances does not reduce it's capacity so probably that is the reason why they don't hurry to fix it >looking for a pool that was supposed to be there I was in a mall in a medical facility first then as I was bathed in some yellow light like fluid pool I went into the higher parts with many people on it. I was looking for a dentist but managed to solve that problem on my own in the end. >large swimming hall mazes This brings back some faint memory but for me it was clean >starting peeing Peeing is weird. The muscles we use for peeing is also used for energy work and learning to pee in dreams without pissing yourself in the bed is something that opens an energy pathway somehow. Had many dreams where I peed then woke up thinking OH SHIT then it was nothing. I had these pee dreams like 3 or 5 times? The lower energy channels can be weird because the first "restraint" we learn is to not pee ourselves but not being able to pee because anxiety and pissing yourself because of fear is both a thing. And they both relate to the root chakra. DAMM SOLVED AN ANOTHER MYSTERY AGAIN The bathroom resonate with the energy pathways between the root and the sacral chakra. Also now mind just registered a bunch of new mysteries relating to this. Carnal desires can be weird and cannot be oversimplified via chakras. Ayyyyy

>>258 >Btw did you figure out your own dreamcheck method? About dreamchecks, when dream-keeping I was very excited about the possibility of astral projection and lucid dreams, and did them like crazy. Mostly staring at my hands/fingers and questioning reality. The weird thing is that the only dream where I ended up doing the check was a bizarre dream when heavy armour sadamitsus(from pic related) where being dropped from military helicopters in the waterfront of my neighborhood. And there were earthquake alerts and stuff. I though that's weird and did the check but strangely my hands looked normal in the dream, and I saw a oriental-style restaurant that actually exists near that spot in the neighborhood, so I thought "This is East Asia, there are many seismic events there, nothing out of the ordinary here. The choppers are disaster relief." So in the end I think that I needed to develop another check? That one didn't work for me, or I was just doing them out of reflex and not actually "questioning reality" so they were just a motor reaction. I don't know. I did got to astral project much later, but that was a stroke of luck and using the "wake back to bed" technique. Nowadays I am waking up very late - around noon - so waking back to bed is not viable. Also, on the topic of fear: When I did astral project, I got afraid of going too far and fucking myself up or that someone would wake me up and the "soul recoil" I heard about would happen, so I never left my room. Looking back that's so lame. Since those dreamchecks failed, can I just come up with dreamchecks of my own? >>259 >swimming halls One of the most recurring dreams of my childhood was a contest among kids in a resort swimming pool. Every time I got close to finishing the contest the dream would abruptly end, some years ago I got veeery far and after that it never happened again. >>257 Yeah, fear is a big player in my psyche. Fear and phobias. You could even say that I'm moved by it. Actually, the entire reason I got into magick in the first place was due to fear. I started doing rituals myself to avoid my phobias from happening, it slowly evolved through the years, and then I met /fringe/. About the dirt in the bathroom mazes, it is not like a filthy gas station with unflushed shit - although, sometimes there is a veritable piss pool in the huge urinals -, but that the whole maze feels "greasy". The walls reflect too much light, as if coated in something. There's mold in the walls. And the pov will keep focusing on peoples moving faces, like a bad director's attempt at introducing a sketchy scene.

The discussion on here must have triggered something. I just had a dream of being in North Korea, where I met Kim Jong Un, there was also another visitor. We were both given the asian cone shaped hats to wear. The dream proceeded with us walking in a park or temple setting with beautiful lanscapes around it, we were meant to show Kim something. There was one main road in the middle and some flowers planted in square shaped concrete boxes. It felt a lot like the dream where I finished it correctly, but this time it was like entering the last level of the game again after already beating it. We went into an old school building by the far end of the park. It looked like something built in the 1950s with zinks in every classroom like they'd prepare back then so that it could be turned into a hospital/refugee center if needed during the cold war. It was mostly abandoned but the lights were on, one room had a kitchen with an oven where a fire was burning. The idea to look for a toilet appeared, but it was just "to check things out". The other visitor said "we don't have to do that, just wait 'til we are out". I looked but only saw locked doors with regular locks and some cleaning cabinet. When we went past the kitchen again, there was a lot of smoke coming from the fire.

>>268 >Since those dreamchecks failed, can I just come up with dreamchecks of my own? That is the best way. Truth is staring at hands and fingers is not enough because dreams can properly remake them they don't always morph. You can make talismans or totems like it was in the Inception movie or the way I do it I look at my palmsitry lines on my hands. They are very specific and they remind me I have hands. Once I know I have hands I can manipulate reality and not just sleepwalk. The dreamchecks need to be specific and whenever you look at it you must not do as a motor reflex as you said it but observe the details and make sure you are not dreaming. Dreams can replicate anything. Once I thought the feeling of pain cannot be replicated in dreams. I was wrong. I hit my head in a waterslide in a dream once and it hurt and went forward while once I was outside and was thinking is this a dream? then as I noticed a grill with burning charcoal I put my hands into it and it burnt my hand. The only thing that differs is the "degree" of pain it inflicts. It is minor so if you "pinch your cheeks" as a dreamcheck make sure you observe the pain and analyze it in every situation to make sure it is real. I had dreams where I was chatting on the web with my friend many times in the past and made me mad that "this is an extremely pointless waste of dreamtime" so I changed the nickname and wrote it on other places something akin to "lookatyourpalms" so if my mind wants to properly replicate that as a dream it has no choice but to remind me also to dreamcheck. >fear is a big player in my psyche. Fear and phobias I know people that operated via fear but for me it is the opposite. I cannot operate because of fear if I even notice my own fear I face it/understand it because it is a limiting force that bothers me. Nowadays I understand the value of fear and how it keeps us away from recklessness but that fear needs to be turned into caution and not paranoia and phobias. >phobias Also phobias can be a mixed bag. Some of them relate to traumas which can be cured if we face them while some of them relate to our soul origin. Some of them are just silly energetic attachments that you can 'grow out' once your environment gets harsher but they can get specific. If you feel comfortable with sharing them you can write them down but they need work. I had a minor fear of heights and corpses but they are not an issue for me for a very long while. It bothered that they have power over me so I got rid of them in my teens with a sort of mental psychonaut daydreaming introspection way. But it depends on the type of phobia and how it materializes for you. It merely triggers a flight reflex from you get paralyzed or it just creates an icky feeling. The way it can be solved depends what and how it triggers you. And ofc how much you want to get rid of them. Some people love their weaknesses and quirks. They think that makes them the person who they are. It created a dumb special snowflake mentality in the last decade. Even allergies can be cured via hypnosis phobias are even more easy to cure... if we want them to be cured ofc. Some people can't accept how easy they can be cured. The way our psyche works can be baffling sometimes and we are mostly not even aware of it. >>268 >The discussion on here must have triggered something Fringe is getting energetically rebooted in the past months. Can't write much about it yet because it turned into a bigger undertaking than it initially looked when it started

>>257 That makes me wonder; is there a kind of material that clothes can be made of that wouldn't disrupt energy flows, or at least would disrupt them relatively little?

>>288 Witches usually use silk or velvet robes but I am pretty sure looking at what exactly Buddhists wear would be a good starting point. They meditate quite a lot so I am pretty sure they know their stuff. Never really looked into it because in the end clothing shouldn't matter once my energy work is proper but in the start up process it counts. It's like how you can easily trample a little sapling but trampling a properly grown tree is not that easy. Also if you find clothes that you use for the sole purpose of meditation should also enhance the energies after a while. This is the point of the "wizard robe"

>>288 Actually, clothing can’t disrupt energy. It always comes back to our bodies being limiters of our transcendent expression (both for control and directed growth). Clothing disrupts your attention via bodily sensation. In extreme cases, a disruption of bodily function, like blood circulation, might prove too much for you to counteract. But most of the time a properly trained energy body (attention) is all you need to turn “disruptive clothing” into perfectly good clothing. Ie, with enough practice you can astral project while standing, although most people might have trouble with it just by going to bed with a full belly or under too heavy covers. There’s an account in one of Alexandra David-Neel’s books about a monk going out of body in the middle of a conversation by just closing his eyes, and doing so with such depth that he looked like he was dead. While standing. To answer your question, light clothing that you can forget about easily. When in doubt, something that lets you do Robert Bruce’s tactile techniques comfortably.

>>299 Yeah I too forgot to mention that the most important thing is for the clothing to be a little loose and not suffocating/restraining and most importantly not make one of your bodypart too hot while letting the other too cold. Full body energy works heat up the entire body and the body will need to find a way to balance that. With uncomfortable clothing you get either distracted or if the energies really start flowing you just say fuck it and throw all of them off. But once the energies settle in and managing the flows becomes natural it shouldn't be an issue anymore. >monk going out of body in the middle of a conversation by just closing his eyes, and doing so with such depth that he looked like he was dead Hahahahaha. Too real.

FYI, >301 is spam, the tor link doesn't resolve to any /fringe/-related page.

Sometimes I have the weirdest experiences in dreams. These are special. They feel more like astral travel, but I'm not fully lucid. They are evil, truly depraved and dark shit. Last night I encountered a guy passing some sort of security checkpoint. He was being told by another one a technique to become invisible. It was called "soul close" and he kept gesturing as if he was closing a zipper. It was quite humorous. I laughed as I watched him go and sit with someone else in front of a heater. Another figure was talking next to them, explaining the rest of us, who were watching, something about how he had the power to do whatever he wanted and how the ones sitting were powerless to resist or something like that. The heater slowly increased its output and we could see how the figures who were sitting, their back to us, got their face melted by the heat. We weren't laughing anymore. But the person talking seemed as amused and happy as ever. Words cannot convey how macabre and disturbing this whole thing was. I have seen other stuff, such as one being once trying to stick a power drill up my ass or another operating on a woman's genitalia in vivo. Hellish shit. I don't know where this stuff comes from.

>>305 Me again. It's interesting. Today a building caught on fire in my city. It might have been premonitory. Sometimes I feel like another life of mine is in actual hell.

>>307 The third eye can open different ways and to different worlds. You might have the so called "infernal eye" which gives you visions and premonitions in a more hellish manner. >I feel like another life of mine is in actual hell. I would say you have a good attunement to it but yes we can have infernal bodies too that are somewhat in the hell dimensional layer already. Once you become aware how you are interacting with this dimension it can become a boon and not just a curse but no matter what you will be playing with fire. Extreme caution is needed when we dare connecting worlds for personal gain or other whimsical reasons. I too meet these places in dreams sometimes but for me they usually have a lesson value. We interact with these places differently and it is not always clear why and how and what exactly is the deeper underlying meaning.

I've been slacking off lately. >>269 Interesting North Korea dreams were very frequent during 2015-2021 for me. The mostly revolved around the Supreme Leader trying to recruit me as a bodyguard or about me applying for crazy competitions whose winners would be selected as KJU's bodyguards. One of these competitions featured anime characters playing dodgeball with us. Fun dreams. >>270 I understand that it is a limiting force, and it bothers me as well, but I can't help it. I think fear is supposed to be a limiter, a dectetor, keep us in check (see pic rels). But the fear responses can get messed up too. The ultimate objective is to integrate your fears into yourself without going mad. This is very difficult as you have to analyse your fears and see which are completely useless and irrational and how the others can be of help. >If you feel comfortable with sharing them you can write them down I have about 7 or so phobias as of now. I will write about them later, when I'm feeling better energetically. The weird thing is the actual original phobia who generated all this shit is the only one I actually beat. Most of these others I didn't have but developed with time. I think getting rid of this shit is the next step in my development. It's keeping me down. >>305 This seems very similar to what I've come to term "bovine dreams". The uncanny hellish feeling of macabreness, the hiding joy some of the dreams-people get, and the feeling of it being more real than a dream.

>>309 >bovine dreams It's interesting that you call them that because once I had one of these in which a cow transformed into a human being and I watched as naked humans were butchered in front of their families while they screamed in horror. This dream happened because I eat meat that didn't sit well with my stomach the night before.

>>305 >>307 Two people had been trapped for more than an hour in the fire and ended up being rescued. These are the two in my dream. I know it. When I saw it I actually cried. Such a bizarre thing.

>>309 >I've been slacking off lately. Same. I too want to write a bunch of effortposts to revitalize fringe but the inspiration is still not at the right place. Trying to figure out how to word things so they don't sound like ramblings of a madman takes time. >I think fear is supposed to be a limiter, a dectetor, keep us in check (see pic rels) I had quite the amount of warrior past lives so fear is not something I dare to tolerate within myself. Luckily videogames managed to awaken the fighting spirit mentality within me already so if things get wild in my mind I just go full DOOMguy. And yes fear can really work as a detector. For me it is different tho because when I am fighting I have to "feel" the killing intent in my "enemies" because at that part my full focus awakens because at that level it is not mere playing around anymore. But it's always different because I don't have a fighting style. My mind just reflexively figures out the usually unconventional tactics against my adversaries. But yes I too had absolute fear and dread coming from dimensions which were supposed to be visited after death. It was just a warning sign so once I passed that barrier it was quite calm. >This is very difficult as you have to analyse your fears and see which are completely useless and irrational and how the others can be of help. True. But you will have to understand the feeling of "daring". The real courage and not the reckless kind. Confidence then courage is important because with that you know you are unable to die because you are always faster than your enemies and always on that thin edge that grants you victory. Can't describe better when my fighting spirit awakens things get wild but I must watch out to not get drunk on that feeling or I lose. I am so glad anime and wuxia is a thing in this time period because this feeling is never really that well documented and portrayed. Not to mention only very few people really gets it. >The weird thing is the actual original phobia who generated all this shit is the only one I actually beat. Most of these others I didn't have but developed with time. That is an interesting development. Going back to the way the phobias developed and reexperiencing it and somewhat trying to tell your childhood self that everything is alright and getting through with them might help (It's about talking to your child persona as an adult or vice versa. You become your own psychologist/mentor to your self that represents the best the trauma and talk it out and look for a solution together). It depends from person to person how we have to deal with it and obviously it depends on the type of the phobia. Some of them run truly deep while some of them just merely wrong wirings in the brain. >feeling of it being more real than a dream. Sometimes they are >integrate your fears into yourself without going mad Yeah the problem is that I am post madness already. There is a thing tho. The human body has the ability to counterbalance madness if we let it. This is why meds can be problematic because some of them block the brain's ability to naturally develop measures against madness but Psychiatry and Psychology is an extremely ill-prepared science today because they still don't acknowledge the victims of Psychosis as anything "real" so they just blind them and numb them instead of trying to help their core issues. Once your problems become post mundane they usually hurt more than help. Wish I could give a more useful advice but how to defeat fear and madness but without knowing much about the nature of the issues makes it tricky and my psychic abilities are a little tired today so I will not even try a reading >>311 This proves it. Your infernal eye is open and you are on the path of the seer now. Wonder what will be the next step in your development.

>>312 >you are on the path of the seer now Sounds chuunibyou as fuck. But ok. Several years ago I dreamt of a woman burning alive on a balcony. I felt it. Not the pain, but the emotional anguish of the woman. A few days later I saw a newspaper article about a woman who caught on fire at home and jumped out the window of her balcony in flames to her death. My “seership” is dumb and cruel.

>>314 >Sounds chuunibyou as fuck. But ok. Do you want me to tell you that you are delusional and this was a mere coincidence that your delusional mind is just making you connect things randomly or some other retarded mundane excuse via pointing out some theory about statistics and personal preferences by trying to deny the truth of these things? >My “seership” YOU ARE NOT A FUCKING SEER YET YOU FUCK BECAUSE YOU ARE UNABLE TO HANDLE IT. I SAID YOU ARE ON THE PATH AND NOT THAT YOU ARE A SEER. Just because I found a waiver about looking for assistants for a brain surgery documentary filming that does not make me a brain surgeon. It just means I can get inspired and do the work to become one because I know where I can start from. >is dumb and cruel. No that is you because you are not trying to even find out how your powers work nor you try willingly understand it. I could call you a retarded schizo too that does not know how to even consciously tap into the stream without someone needing to violently die around you. Do you know why do you have these violent and cruel visions? Because that is the only thing you react to. Your mind unable to even consider remembering the more gentle lessons so the only thing that sticks is when it is this level of brutal and disgusting. You see other things too just unable to recall them. And no >chuunibyou as fuck would have been if I told you you are the descendant of the warped dragon from the Aegis mountain ranging from the past ages or Oceanus you faggot. I just said you have the ability that can predict disasters and if you tune it well you will be able to make a difference and prevent other disasters. Hope you are happy with this more chanlike reply instead of the >chuunibyou one on this board for fucking wizards and mystics.

>>310 I started calling them that after a dream where a "meat-seller" sold some sinister looking meat as "eggs", then the day after I had a dream involving a slaughterhouse. The feeling of these dreams is very similar to the slaughtering of cattle, in that it is brutal, raw but at the same time there is a component of banality to it, as the other "cattle" can't understand what is happening. Afterwards, more brutal dreams followed (not involving literal cows) and the named remained. >>312 >dimensions which were supposed to be visited after death Can you elaborate? >It's about talking to your child persona as an adult or vice versa I'll try this. >Psychiatry and Psychology is an extremely ill-prepared science I feel this. Right now I'm still living with my parents, and my mother is very insistent on getting me on psychiatric meds. I have managed avoid it so far, and don't plan on taking them any time soon. >the nature of the issues It's very complicated. I don't know how I can explain it without writing the Great Wall of China. I think I should work on writing them and then post on the question thread for opinions and solutions.

>>316 >Can you elaborate? I had several and they mostly related to understanding the fear of death. Passing through the dimensions means some part of you dies and reborns. Those parts are usually quite mundane and related to mundane perspectives and such. My first was when I cleaned up my bodily and mental issues and they appeared old metallic rusty factories. Started breaking them left and right because I felt the chains coming from those buildings are embedded into my body. After I destroyed quite the amount I noticed a purple barrier. That barrier gave me an extreme amount of existential dread. But in that pure white fog that I was in I didn't see anything else and I said "fuck it" and went there. Once passing the threshold I found myself in a first purple wilderness then it turned into a quite serene darkness. Realized I will have to visit that place later. As I visited that place before sleep a girl appeared who was like a shrine maiden and showed me several things that resulted in my awakening but that is quite long story. And had a dream where I was a ship's captain and as we sailed the sea we reached the edge of the world literally. It was like the old depiction of flat earth how once you reach the end the water falls down and you enter the abyss. I got scared grabbed the steering wheel and in the last moment while falling down I noticed a cave and me and my crew survived there. It had a stage and everyone started doing a play where they summarized their life and their impression of it while everyone listened in peace. While listening I was thinking what should be my story that I could tell at the "end of the world" to describe my life I somewhat woke up because I didn't know what to say. Then later that night I realized that was the gateway to abyss and the last fear of death and willingly passed it. There were others too but they are more personal and need a longer write up to explain them. Also I never had slaughter house dreams because I live a life where we produce our own meat and was taught since childhood to find it normal so for me it wouldn't even register >It's very complicated. I don't know how I can explain it without writing the Great Wall of China. We have 8001 character limit so feel free t make it. >I think I should work on writing them and then post on the question thread for opinions and solutions. Sure why not. I think the best is sitting down and deciding to write it down no matter what and not thinking how bad it sounds and proofreading it at the end only to make sure it makes sense but not pondering on it too much because we usually overthink it. It usually results in understanding our own traumas better in the writing and proofreading process.

Man, last night I astral projected three times, but I ended up joining a group of degenerates and going kamaloka all night long with them. I need to get my shit together because I don’t want to end up there when I die.

On Valentine's Day, I was feeling very miserable, even nihilistic. Later that night, my spirit wife gave a dream. Most of it was wandering through what I believe to be an astral realm, but the beginning and ending were key. A teacher in a green shirt lectured me on nihilism and how it was killing my soul. I couldn't refute it. After wandering through the realm, I had a sudden psychedelic vision. Green miasmas permeated my sight. An eye developed into a face, then a body. All the while, I heard a hauntingly beautiful electronic song with lyrics that I can't remember, but I knew it was a spell to cast out the nihilism. It worked, since I haven't felt that bad again.

>>317 >related to understanding the fear of death It seems fear of death can be a more complicated nuisance than I thought. I had a weird dream where a woman I know announced the death of someone I know with a glass vase with a small white flower of a clover in it. As she mentioned the way of the death I realized that something is absolutely not adding up and I woke up. It turns out fearing the death of others is also bad on it's own way. While people can be mostly responsible for their own lives it is possible to help others overcome their trials and with a wise council help them keep out of trouble. While karma is karma in the end it can be transformed in a way that is not necessary for it to be lethal. As mages we have power over the flow of destiny that we play with it constantly as our whims and our wisdom allows it. The problem with this fearing the death of others or simply worrying for them is that it gives a shaky disposition to the energies we use to connect with them. It just shows we don't trust them nor their abilities to overcome their trials nor we trust our own abilities that our spells will keep them out of harm's way. It seems the problem here is the same as why surgeons are not allowed to do surgery on their family members. That worry that unsure hesitation will just make your hands shake a little and your focus will dwindle and once your mind envisions failure for a moment instead of letting focus on the things that needs to be done you are in trouble. For now this fear-type appears as some graylike dust in my energy field which does not do harm the same way like other fears but still clouds my vision and disturbs the natural flow of energies. Just looked up the symbolic meaning of the clover (flower) because it took me some time to realize that flower belonged to the clover. > "to be (or to live) in clover", meaning to live a carefree life of ease, comfort, or prosperity It seems this is something I have to realize. What it means to be carefree. How to let go and understand the proper flow of energies instead of tensing over every issue. It's intersting how these mundane issues interact with our spiritual progress. >>332 >lectured me on nihilism and how it was killing my soul Your nihilism is quite interesting. It was a sort of misery type energy which was like >Nothing matters EXCEPT feeding this energy rot within No wonder she said it's killing your soul. Wonder how you got it. Just merely glanced at it because once we pass through astral realms to solve issues the energy signatures can be read sometimes and was wondering if I can gain some insights for combating my own purposelessness. It's not that I have no purpose no goals it's just the current stage of modern mundanity is not some awe inspiring wonder to behold but I am still unable to leave it behind and I have to figure out how I can channel my own energies in a way I am able to continue my spiritual path while grounding myself in the overall mundanity I experience while interacting with others. It's ridiculous how people forgot the importance of the other side and most they do is sometimes believing in God or in the afterlife and nothing else beyond it. Understanding astrology or thinking that the myths and legends of old have any meaning besides some entertaining bedtime story is inconceivable for most of them. I learned to only say as much as they need to hear but it still bothers me a little. But then again for them it's weird I have no interest towards cars booze expensive vacations and other mainstream degeneracy so each to their own I guess. I would die from trying to live their lives. The reason why I ranted because I thought you might have the materialistic nihilism or something similar but it was not that. Just wrote down how I see similar issues with my own eyes but yours was different. What I can see is a sort of energetic rot but I am unsure what feelings made it appear. Sorry for being nosy btw but I too had an experience where an etheric song flushed out the miasma of my heart and was wondering if it was similar. They cannot be easily compared it seems.

>>335 Since my last post was made, this nihilism has made a comeback. >What I can see is a sort of energetic rot but I am unsure what feelings made it appear. >It was a sort of misery type energy That's precisely what it is. More specifically, it's a combination of depression, despair, rage, frustration, and hatred of myself and others, essentially creating a personal hell for myself. >Wonder how you got it I believe it was present to some degree the past couple of years, and I was able to go on with life by simply ignoring it, but in the past few months it's become much worse. I have two theories on why this is: >1. I've created a negative thoughtform over time and now it has taken a life of its own. Spirit wife is fighting against this larva's influence. >2. There is no thoughtform per se. My spirit wife dredged these feelings up to force me to confront and overcome them so I can move on with my life. >The reason why I ranted because I thought you might have the materialistic nihilism or something similar but it was not that Yeah, it's definitely not a material nihilism. There's not much I desire other than a comfy farm in the middle of nowhere. >Sorry for being nosy btw but I too had an experience where an etheric song flushed out the miasma of my heart and was wondering if it was similar Don't worry about it, anon. In fact, I would argue your nosiness has been very helpful, if not life-saving. Did you get a peek at my wife, by any chance? I'm curious as to what she looks like to others

>>336 >it's a combination of depression, despair, rage, frustration, and hatred of myself and others Iktf but for me it was different because I let my negative feelings combat each other. Need to work? Channel rage. Need to rest and forget all the stress? Let depression take over and sleep. Someone started a retarded argument with me disturbing my pace for no real reason? Let him get all my tempered hatred. And let's not mention what happened when other beings attacked me on the astral. But that was my past and I had to let go of it and I am still letting it go. Higher energies must not merge with these lower emotions because auto casting a spell because someone expressed an opinion that I dislike and activating all negative karma in their vicinity at once because I am unable to keep my semi-subconscious temper in check is not okay. Fearing my own powers and not being able to control them because of it was an another lesson I had to understand. But enough about me. >essentially creating a personal hell for myself. What I am saying is not to argue about semantics but this will be important conceptually. You are not "creating" that hell you are more akin to "maintaining" it. What you need to understand how you can "disassemble" or take it apart. The energetic formation you have is like a slow acidic rot that managed to turn into a self reinforcing "organism" of sorts and you will have to slowly "enter it" and see or feel what energies what thoughts are reinforcing it. You will have to slowly take it apart because while in a way you are "creating it" but it also makes you repeat thought patterns that reinforce it's existence. The thing is it's quite weak but because you adapted a lifestyle where you constantly reaffirm it without noticing it has a hard time vanishing until either you start changing or your environment changes and forces a change within yourself. >I believe it was present to some degree the past couple of years, and I was able to go on with life by simply ignoring it Yeah the last years were quite terrible taxing and vexing energetically and emotionally for most people so it's no wonder you have something like this which means it is quite possible that the energy rot you have within is not just yours but a sort of shared energetic amalgamation that your environment and lifestyle with the people around you created which might sound you have no power over it but in truth it's the opposite because once you figure out how you need to change or at least return into your own truth will change not just the way you feel and live but your environment too to some degree. >but in the past few months it's become much worse There are quite the lot of energetic changes and pressures in the air because this retardation we had in the past 4 years is not sustainable and once it reaches a boiling point a change will happen no matter what. Those with spiritual sensitivity or with a sort of "True will" can notice this and get ahead of the crowd instead of suffering a sort of energetic "collective punishment" or mass karma because they can work on their own instead of waiting for others to fix them. It's complicated but the change is coming but those who do nothing but wait will have the rudest and nastiest awakening so it's better to start fixing things as much as we can. >1. I've created a negative thoughtform over time and now it has taken a life of its own. Spirit wife is fighting against this larva's influence. >2. There is no thoughtform per se. My spirit wife dredged these feelings up to force me to confront and overcome them so I can move on with my life. Both theories are somewhat correct. I wouldn't exactly call it a thoughtform but it's quite close because it managed to turn into a sort of self affirming rot like a disease can. It is a sort of energetic emotional and mental/thought mismanagement. How to say it easily. It is like a thought loop in your head that is so repetitive so always present that you could ignore it because the madness of the world around you made you forget your own problems. And you might had perished like most NPCs nowadays but spirit waifu nudged you that it's time to let go of it because otherwise you will die with it. I don't know where I would draw a line for a thoughtform but it is like a sort of energetic sac that contains important life energies that belong to you while a bunch of energetic rot with it so it is able to reaffirm itself but it's true that you (sub)consciously sorta reaffirming it and I know you are somewhat realizing this too so I cannot say you do this unconsciously but you have no idea what activity or life direction would let you "change" and flush these energies out. Now this would be quite the pickle if you were a lowly mundane but you are a fringe wizard so you can shake this off with somewhat magical means. The reason why I say "somewhat" because it will be mostly psychological introspection which is quite mundane but the magical part will be when you summon your spirit wife into your meditation and with her help relive and slowly take out/let go of these feelings and awaken your natural energy flow/inner potential with the process. I need to ask at this part. How much you can work with your spirit wife. Do you interact with her in dreams or you can talk to her during daytime and are you able to summon her into your meditation routine and give her "power" so she can "touch" or fix your meridians? I am asking because I did quite a lot of work with these ways and it's important to find your own powers and establish the power of your spirit wife so you can work and help each other. >My spirit wife dredged these feelings up to force me to confront and overcome I wouldn't say she is "dredging" them more like "reminding you" that they are "there" ... Had a feeling I am missing a meaning of the dredge here besides the "move and cleaning" part just looked it up >bring to people's attention an unpleasant or embarrassing fact or incident that had been forgotten So yes she is "dredging" you but in the end it will be your own energies that will "flush" this out because once they start operating the way they should this rot like energetic compound will vanish. >Since my last post was made, this nihilism has made a comeback. It is like swimming. While you move yourself and push yourself above the water you can breath air for a moment then you submerge again. Understanding when you need to breath and how to "keep in" some of that air so you float by default takes time and practice. What I am trying to say is that while that energetic rot was swept away for a moment like how listening to a good song makes you forget all the worries of your life once the song is over you are back to that life and you start feeling the worries again. Except ofc the song is SO GREAT you push away all those energies forever and change your life with it. You will need to work with your spirit wife or summon that green shirted teacher (that green is the area of the heart chakra and I am sure he is teaching a lesson how to keep your "soul area" clean) and understand how your true energies move and how this energetic rot confounds it.

>>336 >not much I desire other than a comfy farm in the middle of nowhere. I too live on a farm and it is not exactly carefree because I work most of the day and globohomo is trying real hard ruining the farmers in the last 2 decades so I wouldn't say it's easy. There is a reason why most farmers are protesting nowadays. While I can avoid most of the urbanite retardation that doesn't mean I am able to live a life of idyllic self preservation. Only nowadays people managed to realize the importance of nature while in the past they called you a peasant or some other type of uneducated hillbilly because you didn't give up your life for their idle degeneracy. They only think about the hardships of farmers once food vanishes from the shelves. There is a reason why globohomo is buying up farms worldwide in the last decade while before it they only cared about real estate corporate investing and other stock market related money laundering. The shit I have to deal with is ridiculous. People either think you are a backwards mud muncher or a fucking aristocrat that has it too good so shouldn't complain. The market is absolutely borked in the last years and it's ridiculous What I wanted to say with this rant is that you have to understand how you can find the things you need in your current environment. I didn't really look into your life so I am not sure what you are going through and I am not saying to give up the farm life dream but know that no matter where you are and what you are doing the struggles will be always there and you will have to find the way how you can overcome it. The energies are all around us positive and negative alike we just need to find how we can utilize them. But I must agree it can get complicated depending on the people you have around. This is why I usually still post on the internet because I need a wider range of perspectives about the hurdles of modern mundanity because everything and everyone can be fixed but only after you understand the source of the issues. And things can get nuanced and while they might look the same sometimes they have too great of a difference that it cannot be solved in the same way at all. >I would argue your nosiness has been very helpful I am glad. My tactfulness is something I am still developing and I am not always sure of it. >Did you get a peek at my wife, by any chance? I'm curious as to what she looks like to others Didn't look at her in the last post because looking at the spirit wife of others is kinda rude and I only glanced at your energies and didn't do a deep reading. My psychic sight is going through changes and I am not forcing it if it's not important or I am unsure if I should look at all. Sometimes looking into things that you didn't mean to look opens a pandora's box amount of issues and sometimes it takes days to figure out what is going on at all and if you manage to make the wrong kind of entities interested it can get ugly. I looked at her now and the energy is like a gentle white with slight motherly yellow tint (it usually signals it is sort of divine but this is a little different from the divine beings i work with) The energy is more caring and not exactly the same JUDGEMENT/MIGHT OF GOD type of energies I work with. I am a little bad with these gentle energies and learning to handle them. She told me she is unable to appear in the same form as she appears for you. The image I am getting if I force the energies to become "visual" is similar to Ranni >pic related but it feels wrong because it has different energies but it seems I am too forceful with the energies and I should let it manifest on it's own so she can appear. Just found a bunch of insights how "sight" works and how I need to reconnect the meridians so an absolutely high definition high information fidelity visions can appear in a way it is consistent and not cause pain and energetic tension and I am taking it easy with the psychic readings nowadays. How did she appear for you if it's not too personal. The reason why I am asking because these energies are a little different than the ones I am working with and I am not sure what advice I should give you to increase your compatibility or advice is not even needed because you will figure it out anyways. The problem with spirit wives is sometimes they are either too laid back and wait for the right moment/for you to take the initiate or they are pushy as hell and turn your life into a mad haze of energies. Depends on each person which way is the better for them... and what kind of spirit they entangled themselves with... and how far the spirit is willing to go. Sometimes they give up fast sometimes they stay around through several incarnations.

>>338 >Sometimes looking into things that you didn't mean to look opens a pandora's box amount of issues and sometimes it takes days to figure out what is going on ... Might have just did it via looking into your wife. The energies are still around and randomly interact with my energy channels since my post. Was wondering if you are posting an answer or at least intently reading my posts because it is poking me at random intervals while I am watching PILI Totem She told me she counts as an "elemental spirit" if she goes by my understanding but she is still trying to establish a better connection. Wonder where this will lead. While touching parts around my "chest dimension" I noticed her handling some sort of wooden box with a clock on it? And as I see her doing that a short glimpse to a larger dimension appeared... Yeah if this keeps up you will have to share how did you meet your spirit wife and write a summary of your level of interaction with her before she explains it to me in detail from her own POV which will be a little muddled depending on my psychic capabilities and how much I care. I am at the usual limbo when entities do things like this where I am somewhat bothered and somewhat curious at once. Also there is always a chance that it's not exactly your spirit wife but some another entity that latched onto me so you might never know. But I am still patient before >it can get ugly. Seems like my war ready hand manifested a large Onyx Axe. I have never seen that weapon before nor I had a need to use weapons for quite the long while. Currently she does nothing intrusive just touching my energetically problematic areas but it was long when I was energetically "feeled up" this much. My current read is that she is a little too soft so the most she can do is like suffocating you like you do it with a pillow and because of that she has no way doing energetic surgeries but that doesn't mean she has no power it just means it needs to be applied differently. These interactions can get longposty for sure. Not sure if I should report more yet because while it is an >Anomalous Experiences I am not sure if it's related to you at all. Sometimes you just look into someone and a completely different spirit comes through or a different aspect of that spirit. It's like how people act differently in the company of others.

>>337 >>338 >>339 >How much you can work with your spirit wife I'm still working on a lot of magical practices, which is complicated by my busy schedule and my fears. I can sense her, though, and I've been attempting astral projection in my free time. Right now, with my eyes open, I can see her outline as a black cloud of static. I can see her face - eyes, nose and mouth. With my eyes closed, I can see her face with auras that are a vibrant red, sometimes pink, and sometimes violet. At night I can see her outline change to jade green. I can see her tongue as a vibrant color, the exact color je ne sais quoi, but it's a rainbow of ultraviolet-white-blue. >Do you interact with her in dreams Almost every night I see her in one form or another. Last night I saw her as an onryo, which would have been scary if she weren't cuddling with me. >Do you can talk to her during daytime and are you able to summon her into your meditation routine and give her "power" so she can "touch" or fix your meridians? I can talk to her, I think, but it's hard to tell what thoughts are hers and what are what I think she's saying. She can talk to me clairaudiently, usually repeating certain words in the thought stream as emphasis, or saying a couple of words as phrases. She's been able to fix my chakras, like my throat chakra. She does that with a smoky appendage going down my throat and then working on it. >know that no matter where you are and what you are doing the struggles will be always there and you will have to find the way how you can overcome it That's true, and you're not the first one to tell me that. She's asked me before if I would really be happier on this dream farm. After a conversation or two, I came to the conclusion that it would be better for me, but not as idyllic or perfect as I would like to believe. It would be very hard work. >I looked at her now and the energy is like a gentle white with slight motherly yellow tint (it usually signals it is sort of divine but this is a little different from the divine beings i work with) The energy is more caring and not exactly the same JUDGEMENT/MIGHT OF GOD type of energies I work with >She told me she is unable to appear in the same form as she appears for you. The image I am getting if I force the energies to become "visual" is similar to Ranni She is indeed very caring, but I am not sure if she is divine. I asked my patron goddess for her, and she claims to be a "daughter" in an adoptive sense - of that goddess. I've only seen her as yellow once, in one of the first dreams I had where I saw a bright yellow light flash before my eyes and then I felt her presence. Otherwise it's green and red for me. I haven't seen her as Ranni. >How did she appear for you if it's not too personal She appears as a redheaded fairy, like pics rel, with two other aspects - a black-haired tomboy and a blonde-haired motherly figure. All three can appear in the same dream and interact with me. >Might have just did it via looking into your wife. The energies are still around and randomly interact with my energy channels since my post. >Yeah if this keeps up you will have to share how did you meet your spirit wife and write a summary of your level of interaction with her before she explains it to me in detail from her own POV which will be a little muddled depending on my psychic capabilities and how much I care. To be quite honest, I'm not sure when it began, because there are many dreams that I believe to be from her, some as far back as my childhood. This phenomena only really become prominent last year, after I burnt a series of letters with sigils to her. I guess it worked. >Also there is always a chance that it's not exactly your spirit wife but some another entity that latched onto me so you might never know. I believe that to be more likely, as my understanding is that these spirits are very jealous and monogamous. I get the impression "sister" from my wife. Perhaps that may be the case, or perhaps it's a lie. Be careful, and I apologize if I've given you something you don't want.

>>340 >pic Yes. That was it. The hair. That long naturally wavy hair. The problem while establishing a connection with a completely foreign entity that it needs to go through your mind and if there is a similar concept or image occupying the channel it's trying to come through it will appear as the association in your memory first then after it's flushed out a more "real" image appears. She even tried to appear as the other Elden Ring maiden with the wavy hair too (was not sure why Elden Ring didn't even play that game) but it seems the vague image I have about the theme of Elden Ring fits her style somehow. >ultraviolet-white-blue Yes she started to appear with that Ranni blue for a glimpse but it changed fast. >can see her outline as a black cloud of static Yeah that is somewhat her energies she can operate with but it's merely the "early manifestation" because once it stabilizes it becomes clearer. >saw her as an onryo The appearance is similar but she doesn't have those types of hostile energies but entities around the Shinto regions can get complicated because that area is too diverse energetically so I cannot say what is and isn't an onryo. Calling it a "japanese ghost" is not accurate. She is more akin to an "elemental" as she said but I do not know which type and she is clearly trying to sync up to the current world and try to make you more proper so you can "hold her". >it's hard to tell what thoughts are hers and what are what I think she's saying That's how it is until a clear link establishes. She is not exactly "talking" but transmitting her thoughts into your brain so your brain translates the meaning and sometimes your brain just "guesses" when the clear link is either shaky or the thought is untranslatable so it makes up to the closest thing. I too have hard time finding the words to some concepts when I am halfheartedly communicating to entities during the daytime. Usually I need to sit down and focus to keep the mental link clean. Not to mention "small talk" is different from "meaningful talk" and they can change the intensity they transmit their intentions. >usually repeating certain words in the thought stream as emphasis, Yes that too can happen when you are too thickheaded or it clearly shows the "Message is not getting through". Not always the fact that you don't understand what she is saying but "not getting the weight of the meaning" of sorts. >She's been able to fix my chakras, like my throat chakra She also did a quick tuning so I can talk to her better and yes her main area is the throat it seems. >She does that with a smoky appendage going down my throat and then working on it. Yes that "smoke" is her energy or power of sorts and she coiled around my chakras with it to tune it yesterday. >but not as idyllic or perfect as I would like to believe. It would be very hard work. Yeah :/ She gave you a good advice. It shows she knows what she is doing and not just "playing into your desires". Some lower entities just tell you what you want to hear and they get annoying fast with their yesman attitude. It's not their fault that they have no real sentience but you cannot use them for complicated matters. They can follow some commands and help in some minor manifestations but until you figure out what is their real capability or purpose they are not much help. >she claims to be a "daughter" in an adoptive sense Sounds right. Who is your patron goddess btw. My head hurts from trying to hear the answer. My mind gave me a quick guesstimate that it's Aphrodite and while the Archetype might match I am not sure it's her. >haven't seen her as Ranni. Yeah while looking at images of Ranni I knew it will give the wrong impression because she is too much about the hat and the spirit in doll witchyness and not exactly her energies. She wanted to give off a caring companion that will guide you through the stars kind of feel maybe that's why the Ranni image was "autoselected" by my brain. >there are many dreams that I believe to be from her, some as far back as my childhood. This phenomena only really become prominent last year, after I burnt a series of letters with sigils to her. You should ask about those dreams and her interpretations about them. I too summon beings from my dreams after I wake up especially if it's a strong dream that I am unable to interpret on my own so they can explain what just happened. Some entities are ofc just randos that get out of my life quite asap because I just "bumped" into them and they didn't want to bother me that much especially when they find out some of my energies are way too hostile towards them. The awakened incarnated can wield many powers that scares away those that are mere "guests" in this world. >these spirits are very jealous and monogamous I am like a neighbor or an associate and not exactly a competing love interest. >get the impression "sister" from my wife. Perhaps that may be the case Maybe. Especially if she was around since your childhood. Burning a sigil for a companion sometimes stems from the subconscious desire to reestablish a contact with those entities/energies that are not "present" in our life anymore. Some of these entities can be real important for us without us consciously realizing it and we somewhat die without them. It can be real complicated and it depends on each individual and how their "soul origin" works or differs from this lifetime. The problem is with the modern world is this mundane generalization how things work and how everyone should behave and how the "spirits" are not real at all and maybe only the dead can see them. Through the history many people and many groups interacted with spirits daily while seeing them with the naked eye and this is inconceivable for the mainstream thought. Which is bad because some of us have an excessive NEED for these energies and interactions like how we need to eat food and drink water. Without these beings we die inside and if our life is bringing us away from our original lifestyle we die a little every day until we find our way again. >Be careful Always >and I apologize if I've given you something you don't want. No need to apologize if I didn't wanted it I wouldn't have gotten into it. I have a desire to peek into these things once my energies are proper because human curiosity is a drive we have hard time living without. Also I have an energetic "rule" entities can only "enter" if they are willing to help on my path. If that rule can be "broken" then I have to observe my energies around me. Sometimes a very punchable entity can help my energies awaken more than the most wisest guidance. She told me I am like a large mountain with the entrances full with hurdles and I am real hard to enter or connect to without causing pain so she let go her influence after I stopped posting. She is not intrusive and a good reminder I still have entity types I have hard time connecting with. As she said she is more of an "elemental" and we have far more elements than the 4 or 5 main ones. If you share which Goddess is your patron I might be able to look into it but only share it if you want to know details and want to aid my practice. If you consider it too personal no need to tell it to me. The problem is that your spirit has a far more organic connection to the goddess which means she has a hard time connecting to my superficial concepts that I have in my head about the mainstream goddesses. Not to mention if I have a past with some of them I might be a little prejudiced.

I cannot believe how long my posts always manage to become but at least other anons will notice that these things cannot be oversimplified with a simple meme and maybe they will gather their confidence to longpost and help fringe revive a little with their contribution. It's not like there are so many posts here no one has the time to read ALL THAT SHIT but still it bothers me a little that I cannot keep myself short and concise. This was cut off from my post because you can go so far with 8001 characters it seems but no matter what I consider it too important to leave off so even as a mantra it's worth as a reminder. >>340 >perhaps it's a lie Everything is a lie. But for a lie to hold you need to mix in some truths. And the more truth the lie has the stronger it becomes. We need to develop the sight that allows us to see the truth in the lies. In this world truth has a hard time manifesting 100% accurately but that does not mean we cannot find perfection in imperfection. Truth is everywhere and in the end it is us who can decide to remove the veil of lies or entertain ourselves with that lie for a little while. Some say truth is ugly. I say it's liberating because ugly truth usually has depth that needs to be further explored. Truth is not always simple but once you find it it's obvious. It's important to not forget it: Truth is everywhere.

>>341 >>342 >She even tried to appear as the other Elden Ring maiden with the wavy hair too (was not sure why Elden Ring didn't even play that game) Is it Malenia? That would be pretty similar to her form if true. >Calling it a "japanese ghost" is not accurate. She is more akin to an "elemental" as she said but I do not know which type and she is clearly trying to sync up to the current world and try to make you more proper so you can "hold her". I don't believe her to be an onryo, as she sometimes changes dream-forms as often as we change clothes. Since you mention how she shows up as Ranni, I read through my dream journal and noticed that I once saw her as the "Great Sea Mother" - a giant blue-hued goddess that was making love to a boy (presumably me). Calling her an elemental is interesting. I noticed earlier in the thread that several wizards were talking about dreams about bathrooms and bathing. I've encountered her in dreams involving water or baths, like when I saw her swimming in a pool, hanging around at a lake, or when I encountered her in a non-Euclidean washroom. It seems like she's very much associated with water. But if there are more than five elements, and she represents one of those, it could be possible she is a "love elemental", or something similar to that. >Yes that too can happen when you are too thickheaded or it clearly shows the "Message is not getting through". Not always the fact that you don't understand what she is saying but "not getting the weight of the meaning" of sorts I'm definitely as stubborn as a mule, and when I'm not, she sometimes has to dumb things down so I can understand exactly what she means, so that explanation makes sense. >She also did a quick tuning so I can talk to her better and yes her main area is the throat it seems. Last night, she did a "tuning" in my heart chakra. It was slightly painful, like a very thin needle penetrating into your body. It's making me feel better, though, so hopefully it stays that way. >It shows she knows what she is doing and not just "playing into your desires". Some lower entities just tell you what you want to hear and they get annoying fast with their yesman attitude. Exactly. She can be brutally honest with me, but it's never to be mean-spirited, but more or less to destroy the evil and wrong thought in my heart and to build up something better. >You should ask about those dreams and her interpretations about them. I always make sure to do so, especially when some of them are so strange and surreal I can't make sense of them. >Who is your patron goddess Aphrodite is close, but not quite. I'm curious, though, would you be able to tell which goddess from her energy alone? >She told me I am like a large mountain with the entrances full with hurdles and I am real hard to enter or connect to without causing pain so she let go her influence after I stopped posting Hah, that sounds like something she would say.

>>343 >Is it Malenia? That would be pretty similar to her form if true. No it's this one but with a more reddish tint hair and a darker background but it was just a glimpse but as I said I didn't play the game. All my knowledge comes from memes and shitposting. It was the hair. This long wavy hair is important staple for her. Also Malenia is rotting so ew. I don't think she would manifest as her. >it could be possible she is a "love elemental", or something similar to that. Yes she somewhat hinted on it but she said the "love" in my own language which has a different tune/inclination and when I "pressed" on that concept she somewhat shied away from this issue because my understanding of love is not "wholesome" (I am a little autistic about it and especially when entities use it on me I raise my guard because I too can manipulate others with a feeling of "love" and thx to my distrust I need time to accept anyone who starts with that feeling. I don't mean that love is a lie because it is one of the most stable energy type for bonding and spiritual work it's just... Let's say I get real angry when someone plays with my heart for the only reason he/she just simply "can" and didn't mean much by it. Entities of true love understand this so it's not a problem) >Last night, she did a "tuning" in my heart chakra. It was slightly painful, like a very thin needle penetrating into your body Oh that is one of my thing. She told me while commenting on how I am like a mountain that she is looking at my "theories" because I have a "principle" where I let some of my theories to be telepathically shared for friendly/amicable entities free of charge. Well it's not exactly free because they have to share their energies so I can give away some of my energies of sorts but that is a metaphysical mechanic and it boils down to >if someone gives you something you return the favor in one way or the other That keeps things balanced. "Greed" and petty selfishness is impossible in higher spiritual circles because it is like constantly eating without being able to digest it and shit it out. Hard to explain how it works in detail. But yeah she kept her presence around me a little and was wondering what she is doing. Hoped something like this. My energy work is like acupuncture and energetic shifting and overcharge and flow tuning and... too many stuff to list. Once I get good at one type of energy work my guides introduce me to an another one so I cannot say I managed to "master" a single one at all. >I'm curious, though, would you be able to tell which goddess from her energy alone? If I know the Goddess personally maybe but you must understand powerful entities operate via more than a single energy type. If I at least knew which culture she is from it would be easy but it is like a dark well of energies with dark skeletons sitting in the dark guarding the passageway. First I was hoping it's not Ishtar because how people see Ishtar nowadays is almost making me rant. The name Amatheus or Amaterasu tried to come over then Hera too but something is not right and I would need to breach a barrier to see the Goddess and I am not sure if I want to do that. The problem is that because I am in the "dark" I somewhat need to pass through a maze of pantheons to find what I am looking for. It's like being lost in a large bureaucratic building where you don't even know what the signs on the doors do or if you are even at the right place until you are somewhat familiar who or what you are looking for. Not to mention Goddesses have different aspects too that they can appear via depending on your skill level and connection with them. Like Athene appeared for me as a young tomboyish Goddess instead of the all powerful guardian of the Greek culture. She called me Atlas. I asked her why she called me that. She told me because I look like him. That gave me quite the amount of spiritual work as I went on to understand my true nature because of that greeting Also the name and the type of worship changes as the cultures evolve and since christianity we don't have "entity worship" anymore which means some entities larp as Christ or Saints or just stay in hiding then neo-Pagans somewhat resurrected them and let's not mention how they changed with the onset of internet. While back then you needed shrines and followers now they can "spread" via memes and other easily shared information on the web and that is just a mere "invitation letter" but those who can connect via it get the real thing like I said how they instantly get directed to the proper pantheon after the God(dess) accepts them. If you were accepted as a champion or some sort of avatar where her energy is beaming from your presence then finding her would be easy but with your current sufferer of mundane struggles energies around it is hard to locate. Some of those energies around you instantly start an energetic gag reflex so I don't take it in within myself. And if I start a deeper reading I see your mundane troubles more than the connection with your Goddess. I am still far from Omniscience. Also Goddesses have a sort of "true name" which usually stems from a description of their true meaning and not always the current cultural understanding especially because nowadays what we have cannot really be called a "culture" the same way it was back in the old days. Like I get the word "Amazing" because the Goddess was described via that and her energies but that is still not her name while she was called that. It's like tasting a strawberry yogurt and expecting you to tell all the ingredients the name of the cow and the workers who picked the strawberry and being able to say how much profit the company made the year it was produced. There is a level of mysticism where you can do shit like this but it depends on the clarity of the link. Quite scary when the visions are more clear than the reality you see and more meaningful than your entire life. You need an extremely balanced ego for that.

>>344 >No it's this one but with a more reddish tint hair and a darker background but it was just a glimpse but as I said I didn't play the game. All my knowledge comes from memes and shitposting. It was the hair. This long wavy hair is important staple for her. Also Malenia is rotting so ew. I don't think she would manifest as her. I was looking for images of Ranni to reply to this post, and as it turns out, her original pre-doll form just so happens to be a redhead with wavy hair. Is that closer to what you see her as? In some dreams, I've seen her look almost exactly like on the right image, black dress and all. The facial projection that Ranni has looks eerily similar to the faces I see. Another thing - the missing eye. I've had dreams involving Odin, usually in dreams where I gain wisdom and overcome parts of myself. Now I'm wondering why she's choosing this image to me and you. I suppose I should just git gud and play Elden Ring for once, maybe that'll help out. >but she said the "love" in my own language which has a different tune/inclination and when I "pressed" on that concept she somewhat shied away from this issue because my understanding of love is not "wholesome" My desire for genuine love was one of the things that attracted her to me. In her own words, "You never gave up on love." I get where you're coming from with insincere or manipulative love though; that's one of the things that makes me worry in this relationship. Perhaps it's another issue of mine, or perhaps it's intuition. I'll find out one way or another. >If I know the Goddess personally maybe but you must understand powerful entities operate via more than a single energy type. If I at least knew which culture she is from it would be easy but it is like a dark well of energies with dark skeletons sitting in the dark guarding the passageway. I should have known it wouldn't have been that easy. She's an obscure goddess, and would have been relegated to a historical footnote were it not for 8chan. I'll give you a hint: she's an Italic goddess, comparable to the Roman Diana.

>>348 >her original pre-doll form just so happens to be a redhead with wavy hair I completely forgot how her predoll form looks. Nice find. >Is that closer to what you see her as? She changed forms several times but she is more of an elemental energy and a form is something that appears only when our energies stabilize or reach a compromise. The form usually depends on the energy interactions. >black dress and all Yeah she had that. >the missing eye. I've had dreams involving Odin, usually in dreams where I gain wisdom and overcome parts of myself That is a complicated mechanic. The gist of it is that a part of your brain gets possessed or inspired and when that happens your consciousness goes into 1 hemisphere (more or less) and the other is being overtaken by some force that is communicating with you. The actual science is more complicated because it depends on how "open" is your mind and the brain naturally have some "slots" like some devices have USB ports and SD cards that can be used for data transfer so this 1 eye = 1 hemisphere is not strictly true but this is the base idea. I don't even remember where I read that inside of us the kundalini snake has 2 eyes one always sleeps while the other always watching. It usually refers to the third eye and how it functions but it is complicated. I have witnessed so many eyes while meditating or just introspecting and most of the times it turned out I am just activating some meridians of the third eye and the physical eyes. Losing one of your physical eyes allows it to be replaced via a "magical eye" that can see other things. It's complicated and even in the eastern tradition there is something called the "dharma eye" which gives you insight into spiritual teachings and the magical nature of reality. Balancing it takes effort. I didn't encounter Odin because I have my own wargod/allfather aspects already. Quite the few tbh. >I suppose I should just git gud and play Elden Ring for once, maybe that'll help out. Maybe. I only played the 3 Dark souls games and didn't play ER because my PC is too potato for it and I don't really want to buy a new one because I want to curb my internet and videogame addiction and I know once I buy a new PC I would just play decade+ old games or games that will waste half my waking time. Elden Ring is the usual fromsoft kino with a little George R.R. Martin flavor added and I think that is how it gained it's western folklore influences that dark souls didn't have. I skipped it so far. But the theme is on point so it might help. Who knows. >My desire for genuine love was one of the things that attracted her to me. In her own words, "You never gave up on love." Yeah I understand your relationship more now. I too never gave up on love but it is not something I look for. I mean it would be nice but I don't want to lose real love because of my current issues nor I want to be loved in my current wretched form. You heard that saying >If you can't handle my worst you don't deserve my best And no one can handle me at my worst nor I want to be my worst around the people I love. I want a love where I can be my best effortlessly. And now I know the way towards that. It takes time tho. It's a well known "manly autism". Prominent figures always had this kind of thing here and then. The spirits understand at least. >I get where you're coming from with insincere or manipulative love though; that's one of the things that makes me worry in this relationship. Now that I am wiser than back then when I feared love... Don't stress too much about it. Love is something natural that most people experience and it is not such a sought after treasure entities use for bait. Lust on the other hand is more dangerous as bait. Love is not always. The current world managed to make people way too stressed out about the ways of love. It is supposed to be natural and they made it artificial a product they make you think you need to "buy" then remind you you will never have enough money for love... Even love comedies are all about materialistic struggles. And those with spiritual messages and themes are always tragic. It's sad. Do you know how these tales were in the ancient times? >There was an evil being with mesmerizing beauty who ate people >Then he was slayed by the hero for being evil THE END then the other >There was this fickle entity in the wilderness that the innocent fool found >Then they had sex and lived happily ever with a new race of children stemming from them There were so many stories like this. Some of them remained but not much >I should have known it wouldn't have been that easy Well... The last days were quite interesting with that. While I am tempering my wizard arrogance to not jump into every type of trouble just because I can that doesn't mean I didn't dip into it. Where should I even start. It's a long story. While in the long past I worked with the planetary deities while still being quite the neophyte... Some years ago I had quite the dark night of the soul phase and had a dream. It was with Saturn. It was me a dark wall separating me and a large being that I thought might be Saturn. A gun appeared from the darkness. That gun had the extreme intention to shoot yourself in the head with it. It was a weapon that could only be used for suicide and not for killing others. I grabbed the gun slowly and put far away from myself so there was no way I would accidentally shoot myself in the head. A long hand grabbed that gun from the shadows and shot itself in the head. Saturn literally killed himself front of me. That was quite the I didn't expect this shit moment because I was expecting quite the mental battle. When that large body fell on the ground the energies left the body from the wound and the body turned to dust. The energies slowly and gently approached me then they entered my being and explained how spirit gives life and how the materia never lived and only it functions via the spirit. The spirit never dies nor the materia because the materia never lived. Reconnecting the spirit to the materia can resurrect it because the information that the spirit either left imprinted or it is unable to carry forward stay there. With this I learned how I can access the sort of "past history" that is hidden within everything. You just momentarily give back the spirit to the dead materia. With that you can retain past memories without disturbing the already dead spirit. A sort of informative necromancy. Has many other uses too but it's not important. The main lesson was that fearing death is only for those who are not one with nor understand the spirit. It was quite a milestone in my path because I learned how detaching the spirit from faulty materia is not always "murder" because they never lived they just malformed. With this I was able to change the form and the underlying mechanism far more effortlessly in many aspects of the mind/body and in reality too. Also I am in the agriculture business. That is the field of Saturn. How death creates life and how life creates death. Saturn is not just death and limitations. That perspective is faulty.

>>348 Now back to the current development >it is like a dark well of energies When encountering these kind of darknesses it is important to either have absolute conviction and break through (The reason why the absolute conviction is necessary is not just for the high success rate but because you will have to explain yourself to the spirit why you disturbed them with your reckless attitude) or take a step back and listen. Observing the nature of the darkness syncs your mind to the energies and might reveal it's origin and how to light the way in a gentle way. I realized I have the way of the branches already (It is a sort of energy work. How branches break through the ground you can feel energy move up that way in your body. Sometimes it is peristaltic like how worms move or it is like how lightning and electricity moves. These are important understandings of energy work especially if you break through mental blocks or connect to unseen and unknown places) Letting those branches form lighted up the way then I realized that I completely forgot to do my homework on this. About Artemis and the female aspect of magic and hunting and the moon. I have my own connection towards these energies so for me it was not that crucial. Then as I felt I am only steps away from a revelation I sat down and realized the only thing I know about Diana is that she is the Roman version of Artemis and the only thing I know about Artemis the she is the moon sister of Apollo has a bow and a dog and nothing else. So I looked up Diana because I know how she is the patroness of the hunters even nowadays but I didn't expect this deep rabbit hole that even the wiki listed. >with dark skeletons sitting in the dark guarding the passageway. Actually there were 3 skeletons in the 3 directions. I didn't know they represent that Diana represents the Y fork crossroads and she is a TRIPLE GODDESS. The hunt the moon and the netherworld. The reason why I have seen that dark with the skeletons because there was a legend about someone being buried under the temple of Saturn. It just meant how this aspect got into Rome after it somewhat "acknowledged" Saturn. Which means why it looked like that because I had the authority from Saturn but I didn't have the further understanding yet. Her whole deal is a mess. She was venerated by the latin tribes then somewhat were merged with several entities and once they made contact with the greeks Artemis and Diana somewhat merged because they made Artemis statues and shipped that to Rome then worshiped it as Diana. As someone who posts with the iron pill flag this is something I should have known so I felt kinda ashamed for not doing my homework in my past. What I knew before this is that Orion was the alpha male hunter the apex predator who was more of an animal than a man while Artemis was the divine craft of hunting. Artemis is a good archetypal aspect. Her femininity calms the male hunter who is alone in the wilderness while her dog represents the inner bestial aspects aka instincts of the man and focusing on that using their guidance can lead to extremely good tracking abilities. For women Artemis and Hecate is important because they regain their power and divinity as a female and with understanding the "dog" they understand the bestial nature of man and once they can sate/handle that animalistic aspect they can enjoy the better parts of their man. Not to mention Diana protected women during childbirth which is why I got Hera. Not to mention that "amazing" was referring to the word "Amazon" via signalling that it is a female but the "long lost female". Women nowadays don't understand what it means to be a "strong female". They think being strong means being bossy and bitchy. Women not being able to handle childbirth signifies an extreme weakness this is why they had to invoke these entities for protection. What I wanted to say with this. These energies were mixed up and thanks to christianity not respecting these traditions they had to appear in different forms. Diana at least is still invoked in games and other places because no saint managed to take her place. This is where I calmed down because I was getting quite the informational load and as you can see by my longpost I am still processing things. >an Italic goddess There were quite a lot. The ancient latin tribes the Etruscans and other forgotten tribes that were unified under the umbrella of Rome not to mention the greek aspects. The wiki lists Nemorensis and Artume but this is where I stopped looking. My homework was still not done and rushing in all directions is not wise. There were many more goddesses worshiped as Diana. Too many. People found these entities on their own while hunting and authority had to draw a line which Gods can be worshiped as state approved Gods. People had a closer relationship with these energies back then and wasn't just mere historynerd trivia like today. Letting these energies reemerge takes a little toll. Especially because I too have my own connection with my land and it was literally at the border of the Roman empire but was not occupied with it. Was interesting meeting the entities of my local hunting lodge in the past. They were like halflings. They are unable to connect properly in the last centuries but they are still here. It had the hunting party with horses and dogs feel and not the nowadays hunter but they try to adapt. Now I understand your feelings towards that farm. You don't desire the Saturn aspected back breaking work and toiling type of farmlife but the one where you can live with the forest via foraging and poaching without anyone bothering you... The problem that this kind of carefree life is almost gone from the modern world. You need hunting permits for everything work with your hunter's lodge and while reattaining that feeling is not impossible especially if you can go truly innawoods into bumfucknowhere where not even electricity or plumbing exists or at least find a community that stays silent but... I too think this is not what you need in the long run. It might refresh your energies living like that for a year or 2 but I am not sure that is your destiny but I don't know. It truly can be charming when you are used to it but nowadays it is a nightmare. You need money and time so you can work with the hunters lodge. Hunting is not the same like it was in the antic era nor like in the middle ages since we have rifles. It became the sport of the weirdos and the rich. It's either trophy hunting or some niche "kitchen hunting" but it usually goes for restaurants. I am not trying to ruin your dream I am just mentioning some facts about this lifestyle because it is around me. Even italians come here to shoot some ducks or boars. I could tell tales about the hunting industry.

>>348 But back to the goddesses. As I cleaned a channel a female entity grabbed me gently from my back. She told me they are able to return me the "lost female aspect of my soul". It is not exactly the feminine nor the divine feminine it is the naturally strong woman aspect that is "missing" from 99% of the women nowadays. The conformity made them too complacent too lazy. Nowadays very few women would be able to survive in the wilderness. Back then they managed. No one knows how. I reclaimed some female aspects in the past but not exactly this one. There are more mysteries here but they take time to uncover. I just wrote this as a thanks because you too managed to help me quite a lot with this. If you are still here and want to talk about this maybe more things can be uncovered but I am not sure where this will lead. There are many things here and made me wonder if this was an another coincidence or the winds of destiny because the way you didn't reveal the goddess was almost like an invitation. Like how the hunter is seeking the prey then thinks he lost it then it makes a noise and he accidentally enters a completely different grove which is out of this world. >would have been relegated to a historical footnote were it not for 8chan Was there a thread about her in the past that I missed? Was it on that other magical board... What was it's name again. Went there like twice but I was quite busy in the past so I missed quite a lot. This became quite long and I left out many details. But it's always that way with truly anomalous experiences especially if you are able to interpret them

I don't consider it anomalous at this point, but I can often decide to check out someone astrally before going to bed and I'll spend the whole night with them. They often remember it, too. I still can't fully control it, since I'm not 100% lucid.

>>354 >>355 >>356 >She changed forms several times What other forms did she take besides Ranni and her redheaded form? I'm curious to hear what you saw. >The gist of it is that a part of your brain gets possessed or inspired and when that happens your consciousness goes into 1 hemisphere (more or less) and the other is being overtaken by some force that is communicating with you. The actual science is more complicated because it depends on how "open" is your mind and the brain naturally have some "slots" like some devices have USB ports and SD cards that can be used for data transfer so this 1 eye = 1 hemisphere is not strictly true but this is the base idea. There's actually a pretty good website which goes over the scientific topic further. (http://www.uppsalaonline.com/uppsala/somafera/) Somafera, the author's name for what we would call the berserkergang or the riastradh, is that process of "posession", or perhaps mental unification, where you gain the superhuman abilities associated with that state. <There was this fickle entity in the wilderness that the innocent fool found <Then they had sex and lived happily ever with a new race of children stemming from them Funny, I would describe myself as that fool, but being a fool is not necessarily a "bad" thing. I was reading Daimonic Reality: A Field Guide to the Otherworld, which has a passage on the Wise Fool. In traditional fairy tales, he's the unassuming youngest son who's not the brightest, not the most accomplished, nor the bravest, and is seen as a useless idler and fit only for herding swine. He's the old-times equivalent of a NEET, basically. However, unlike his more accomplished and arrogant brothers, he's humble, listening to those who give honest advice, and cunning, able to outwit monsters that would eat him. On the quest to find the Princess, his brothers fail due to their arrogance or humorlessness, while he succeeds. Essentially, the fool, like the madman, has his own hidden wisdom. >I didn't know they represent that Diana represents the Y fork crossroads and she is a TRIPLE GODDESS Exactly, and that would explain why my spirit wife shows up as three different aspects. She's also identified herself with other triple goddesses like the Celtic goddesses Brigid and the Morrigan. There's a clear focus on life, healing and poetry, and also strength and war. This would explain a great deal about her personality, and also her more "tough love" moments where she tries to tear down the old and build up anew. It would probably also explain the huge amount of corvids I see all the time, assuming it isn't a natural phenomenon. >Not to mention Diana protected women during childbirth which is why I got Hera. Yes, and my wife is very sensitive about children as well. As an example, I was watching Eraserhead last night and the parts with the monstrous baby made her very upset. It was a very hard watch for her, and her feelings in turn made it hard for me to watch it. >Women nowadays don't understand what it means to be a "strong female". They think being strong means being bossy and bitchy. Definitely, and I think what helps is having lived with actual "strong women" in my family, all of whom were rural farmgirls and such who lived actual hard lives. >Was interesting meeting the entities of my local hunting lodge in the past. They were like halflings. They are unable to connect properly in the last centuries but they are still here. It had the hunting party with horses and dogs feel and not the nowadays hunter but they try to adapt. >Now I understand your feelings towards that farm. You don't desire the Saturn aspected back breaking work and toiling type of farmlife but the one where you can live with the forest via foraging and poaching without anyone bothering you... You nailed it. I just want to live a comfy life innawoods, although I certainly wouldn't mind the farming either, as I do love gardening. That would have to be a necessity anyways, just to have a stable source of food. >The problem that this kind of carefree life is almost gone from the modern world. Also sadly true, although at this point with how fucked the world is, I almost don't care about those. I'll try everything in my power to make it happen. >I too think this is not what you need in the long run. It might refresh your energies living like that for a year or 2 but I am not sure that is your destiny but I don't know Perhaps, but whether or not it is my destiny, I'll try it anyways. At the very least, I'll be energetically refreshed >As I cleaned a channel a female entity grabbed me gently from my back. She told me they are able to return me the "lost female aspect of my soul". It is not exactly the feminine nor the divine feminine it is the naturally strong woman aspect that is "missing" from 99% of the women nowadays. Hah, good luck with that, wizard. These female entities are a lot of fun, if you can manage them. At the very least it's good that they're working on the lost female aspect, that's incredibly important and rare in these days. >There are many things here and made me wonder if this was an another coincidence or the winds of destiny because the way you didn't reveal the goddess was almost like an invitation. Like how the hunter is seeking the prey then thinks he lost it then it makes a noise and he accidentally enters a completely different grove which is out of this world. I was going to reveal her name, but I'm not sure whether that would disrupt the hunt and give you a chance of discovery for yourself. I'll opt out of it for now just to see what happens. >Was there a thread about her in the past that I missed? I don't know if there was ever a post about her on /fringe/ or /x/, nor on the independent fringechans.

>>371 >I'm curious to hear what you saw. When I was going to sleep she sorta appeared like gollum but female and less bad looking but it clearly shows she lived a life within the wilderness. That doesn't mean she was ugly but adapted to the "raised by wolves" look. At that level her presence was somewhat faint so "divine appearances" were hard to pull. I know I have seen pics that describes that look better but search engines are quite shit nowadays so this is the best I found to describe it. Imagine them merging but with a wavy hair. >call the berserkergang wtf. How did I miss this site so far. I literally developed this technique on my own. Literally started doing it in the early 2010s. These correspondences are always weird. Will read through it sometimes. Thanks for linking it. While what it describes is something I did on my own it has useful observations and insights. >that process of "posession", Yeah I figured out how I can cultivate or overcharge my emotions then overload all my muscles with it. It was quite rudimentary and had many issues and finding this site would have been helpful a decade ago but at least I could find my theories on my own. Learning that it is possible to possess demons and other entities with this extremely overcharged mental state was something weird. Will read through the site sometimes. >perhaps mental unification Yeah I am doing that for a while >where you gain the superhuman abilities associated with that state Takes time to temper them. A wrong thought can wreak havoc. >but being a fool is not necessarily a "bad" thing In the tarot the Fool is the one that embarks on the journey to find the major arcana. He is the one that will find all the tarots. He represents the journey. He is one of the best cards. >the Wise Fool Yupp. That's him. >cunning, able to outwit monsters that would eat him Important skill on the journey. Arrogance sometimes leads us into the worst kind of pitfalls especially if the arrogance has no real merit. >and poetry Yeah when the connection got stronger the lessons started to rhyme. Made me realize how much I neglected the side of myself that liked that. Perfect channeling has a sort of beautiful musing. Because the feelings harmonize the words themselves. It's beautiful when it happens. >clear focus on life, healing and also strength and war I have these aspects but only their masculine version. Which is bad because it is imbalanced. This is why they offered me this missing part of myself. I realized I can use great deal of abilities now but I am too imbalanced and can't handle the recoil. At the start you cannot really go too far with psychic abilities because you don't have enough energy and you get tired or just lose your balance and need to start grounding to not go mad or sick. Now that I somewhat have my own foundation and my energetic connections... I had to realize my body doesn't have the necessary flexibility yet. Psychic channels have a sort of tension level and need proper postures and mindfulness. This is why in the past mad people had a strong pressure in the head and they literally made holes on their skull to alleviate that. That pressure can be alleviated it's just you have to understand how pressure and tension appears and moves in the head. The brain is a muscle and can be tensed as easily as the biceps it's just you need to be aware of the movements. Takes a little time to adjust. I could always turn off migraines and other pain types in the past but now my lesson is to become hypersensitive to pain and pleasure so I know that I am guiding the energy perfectly in my body. Truth is I more or less post on fringe to see how my energies change while talking about spiritual matters. Talking about them invokes them and they sway my perception and I realized I cannot continue on the path while keeping it deeply bottled down within. But that doesn't mean I have to go and ramble like a madman for poor mundanes. Not everyone has the ear and the time to listen to these drivels. Bu that doesn't mean it must be kept hidden within. Ir creates a quite strange energy block. Hard to explain. Muddling up truth with mundane matters hurts the development but understanding the flow of truth is crucial on the path. It's about learning to say the right thing at the right time kind of thing. >huge amount of corvids I see all the time Might be. Some years ago I had quite the amount around. Then some months ago a single one made it's caw caw caw quite close to me and I asked if it's carrying a message to me. I got a 'No' as a reply and it flew away. Didn't see corvids since that. Might be a coincidence. >Eraserhead I didn't watch that classic yet but yes she might have noticed the "influence" the baby was carrying. These surreal movies sometimes carry energies that connect to quite the hostile anti life hell dimensions. Some people call them trippy but they are quite inhuman and anti-life and lead to some perverted mental degeneracy which is usually followed by other issues. Can't say much about them because there are quite a lot of them and they differ in many ways. Visited some and some of them were interesting and some representation of some parts of the earth while some of them were an egregoric disease that had to be purged >she tries to tear down the old and build up anew Don't we all. Tho for me it is not a old vs new but more of a degenerated/diseased vs healthy/way of truth. >in turn made it hard for me to watch it There is that saying. Those who feel cry those who think laugh. As long as you "think" you can enjoy the horrors and peculiarities of these shows but once you start to feel what are they really about and what they represent you will be unable to enjoy it the same way. >I'll try everything in my power to make it happen. Good luck. Your dream is not impossible. Just don't stress on it too much. I too had to learn to not stress too much on the wrong issues.

>>371 >I'm not sure whether that would disrupt the hunt and give you a chance of discovery for yourself Well you see I am not exactly "hunting" because I am quite territorial. I have quite the territory I am overseeing and usually I just "connect the realms". I realized that nowadays there are many cults and ways people can access these information without being branded as a heretic but the energies have a hard time returning because the modern hubris we have around us made us forget the natural way. So usually I just unclog channels and help the entities increase their presence in this world. It's a sort of egregoric cleansing and maintenance. People lived and worked with these spirits in the past. Some people still do subconsciously without realizing. I am merely trying to find the way to help people reattain their truth. The way I do my journey nowadays is different. As much as it is fun to be on the hunt and as much it is fun to chase... My belly is full and my freezer is full with meat. If I wish for a prey it appears. That is not what I am looking nowadays. I want the forests to return with life. (Also currently I have like 50 deers around me when it was usually 5. Since I work with forest entities stuff like this happens. Not to mention my bunny who had a Rorschach test like pattern on his fur just decided to grow the symbol of Φ on his forehead like a special third eye. Good thing I am past the level where I am bothered by these minor coincidences.) >I'll opt out of it for now just to see what happens. You are such a tease. Might look into this case further. I am pacing myself currently because in the past I had an absolute thirst for these things but nowadays I have to understand that there is a difference between a wild animal and a rabid animal. Wild animals retain their own nature while rabid animals are only aggressive to spread disease. The wilderness has it's own natural calm that is needed to be understood. We forgot that because we were conditioned that this conformity and pent up stress is what constitutes as being calm. >I don't know if there was ever a post about her So does that mean you found her on your own? The only reason I am asking because understanding your original connection is important if I want to track the signature. Some spirits are around us since our birth some appear via destined events while we can find entities by our free will and desire. There are different mindwaves you have to use while tracking these forces. In actuality I could do it if I really tried but imagine if you only had a GPS marker to a skyscraper and you don't know if you are looking something in the sewer system in the skyscraper or on the plane that is currently passing over it. And I had to learn to not get overeager about this because jumping down from the plane crashing through a skyscraper and splashing into the sewer is not a good experience. This is why I try to limit my recklessness nowadays. Not to mention after it you have to either clean the energetic dirt or apologize to some entities and decide what to do with the "new friends" that decided to live with you suddenly. You see some people have "passive" entities that can sense their potential and waiting for the chance to tell them something and once someone with realized potential just snoops in they become like scam artists following you around. Trying to pull you into the weirdest kind of deals. I have a natural DO NOT DISTURB presence but once I break it via snooping into things that shouldn't be my interest they consider me too willing. I am not saying I am not it's just once you can see something it usually means they too can see you now. This is why figuring out the proper entrance into some mysteries is important. Not everyone wants to go through a sewer then beat the security guards just so they can buy a donut from the office cafeteria. Accessing some realms can be really this strange. If they are random evil entities no one cares if they are gone but if they are proper entities there are some customs that need to be followed. And once you enter these realms it's important to appreciate them. That way the experiences and the lessons stay with you. Might meditate on it later.

>>339 Hey Wizard, I need to warn you. Whatever spirits you're currently interacting with related to this matter need to be banished ASAP. This isn't some cute redheaded love elemental, it's a fucking reptilian - almost the exact same type that Kyle Odom saw, except I don't see the pointy cones on their heads. At least, that's what I'm seeing with third-eye sight. That "dredging up" of my emotions wasn't therapy, it was loosh farming - feeding that rot within me. The green lights I was seeing, the red auras, the tongues, the strange faces, the lower back pain, it all makes sense now. Can't believe I was fooled, but now I know. And my goddess did not send it, it wormed his way in. >Seems like my war ready hand manifested a large Onyx Axe. I have never seen that weapon before nor I had a need to use weapons for quite the long while. That was definitely your intuition speaking. This being is trying to worm its way into your defenses with false promises of "helping" and "loving" you, like it did to me. Fight this bastard, detach it from your body if it's attached, and cast it back into the abyss. Last thing any of us need is to end up like Kyle Odom.

>>376 >This isn't some cute redheaded love elemental Never truly saw it that way. For me to accept any being it needs to have an extremely divine presence. She was on an "elemental level" which is something I have quite the amount around myself. I don't need more. >it's a fucking reptilian There are quite the amount of reptilian and dragonlike races around. There are the 'slave' reptilians the 'overlords' then there are the 'criminal scum' reptilians that are some weird in-between if we go by the average reptoids new agers talk about. There are different reptilian races out there but yes if any of them shows hostility get rid of them. I too am somewhat uncomfortable with most of them. When one of them called me a "slave" I sent them the fuck away... It turned out the group that observed me was a slave group and everyone who is not a "Lord" is a slave by default. Like how jews call others goys or gentiles but reptoids even call their fellow lower caste like that. A low caste reptilian and a mildly psychic human is almost the same for them. But that is a complicated matter. Metaphysical politics are cumbersome af. Really hard to talk about. >I don't see the pointy cones on their heads I never seen a reptoid with a pointy cone on it's head. They are not always the same race. It's like how we have Nordics sub-Saharan Africans and different kind of apes. We are all hominids in a way but definitely not the same on many levels. Some reptilians live on earth for a while then some of them come from space or from weird neighbor dimensions. >That "dredging up" of my emotions wasn't therapy, it was loosh farming - feeding that rot within me Truth is life is a therapy by itself. Sometimes ending up in crisis situations renews us more than Psychiatrist taking our money and making us addicted to drugs. We need to get out of our "comfort zone" because usually it is this false comfort that is killing us. I too had my own share of life and death situations. Most of my life I was thinking how much I want to die and those life and death situations made me aware that I still want to live (but don't know how). Hard to talk about these things because as much as modern education taught us how the past was backwards and bleak people managed to go through it without anti depressants. And yes there are reptilians that meddle with spiritual affairs of humans but they suck at it because they don't understand human anatomy. We are too "apelike" for them and most of them are unwilling to accept the "godspark" we have. Hate to talk about it because newagers managed to make so many misconceptions I always fear what I say will just lead to further misconceptions. >the lower back pain Did it appear with the spirit? Our posture is quite dogshit in the modern times especially if we spend our time sitting the whole day then go and lift heavy objects. Not to mention sleeping the wrong way. Lower back pain can stem from many issues and if it's truly spiritual it needs an even further understanding. >false promises of "helping" and "loving" you Nah she understood quite fast that she cannot do any of those nor I have a want for those things. She didn't even try to promise anything. Once she noticed she is quite unable to enter my mind without causing pain and I was eyeing her like a snake looks at a passing prey she understood that forcing me in any way is not something she can do. But yes it was weird how she fast she appeared for me. "Love spirits" usually merge with our soul and not jump into an another place with a minor intent. Especially if they are in a "benevolent" or "STO" faction because to meet them usually you have to accept their thinking or "creed" in a way. Also if anyone is able to exploit my presence/defense it is a lesson. That means there are still parts of me I don't understand. I welcome my enemies because they too can teach many things... and maybe I too can teach them stuff they won't forget. >loosh farming You see not all "loosh" is something beneficial for entities. Some of them is like a disease like a curse an additional karma. Those that take that is not "theirs" will learn the price of that action. >Fight this bastard, detach it from your body if it's attached, and cast it back into the abyss I am sure you know the quote already from picrel. Entities exploiting your weaknesses is shadow work on steroids. Sometimes it's a blessing in disguise. >Last thing any of us need is to end up like Kyle Odom. But this one is true. If you are unable to deal with the entity get rid of it no matter what. I even had entities giving me a high density energy and it gave symptoms of epilepsy. I was unable to handle that energytype. Sometimes it's important to take a step back and observe the situation we are in. Also love is a bitch. There is a reason why I am not dealing with entities that use that energy at all. I need a high level of trust to even bother dealing with entities that emit any type of love energy. And let's not mention how many >I can fix her/him entities are all around and their methods are not always amicable at all. And yes your energies are confusion/anger and frustration/disappointment. Even I can feel it. And my sensitivity is barely above average in these things. Hope you get through it. Oh and one more thing. >And my goddess did not send it, it wormed his way in. Unless our energies reach a high level of spiritual clarity or as new agers say "higher vibration" we can only accommodate "lower entities". And they are more of a trouble than worth. It's not easy to find who or what we need at the start. Mostly because we are unable to even see them until the fog of lower energies clear from our vision.

>>376 I remember Kyle Odom; I have this saved on a flash drive from the old /pol/ thread about him:

>>376 Tried opening my third eye chakra through some chanting after having opened the lower chakras, and I saw a bit of a swirling fuschia and purple void. When I jumped off for a second to check half/pol/ my eyes fell upon some happy merchant edit of Jesus and I saw that image in its full vileness take up my third eye's vision. Was freaking out internally, telling myself to banish or remove it to no avail. I don't know why, but it feels like I can't synchronize my words to my mind and now my heart's been pounding in fear over it corrupting or overwriting memories. I feel powerless to get my third eye's focus off of it in any meaningful capacity, let alone wipe it from my being.

What is the /fringe/ explanation for the phenomenon of repeatedly waking up into multiple realistic "dreams" before waking up in this reality? It happened to me again last night. >couple of family members come to visit me >reminiscent of when I was younger and they came by frequently >they're both playing with their phones, sitting in chairs in the middle of the kitchen, which is weird but plausible >it's dark outside >I'm the only one standing up and walking around, mildly anxious >I notice there's carpet where there's normally tile and scrape it with my foot, feeling it vividly >someone who is abusive to me comes home and makes me somewhat more anxious that's the last thing I remember before I "woke up" >glad that stupid dream is over >this time everything is exactly as it is in "real" reality >sun is up >check out my desktop computer which I've accidentally left running again >there's this subtly animated pixel art scene on the monitor, of something that looks like a dungeon from a fantasy setting >not overtly sinister-looking by any means >oscillating text on the bottom says "2025 FOUND" >extremely vague yet ominous messages keep appearing as I struggle to turn the shit off >they imply that who or whatever is seeking me out through time, and it's coming >I finally get the inkling that I'm not actually awake >have to physically turn away from the screen and will myself out of there >almost indescribable feeling, kind of like I found a new dimensional axis and moved on it >in bed again, experiencing sleep paralysis which I'm very familiar with >I'm cool with waiting out the paralysis but I must look at the monitor to know if I'm safe >with extreme difficulty I manage to either physically turn my head or my astral body's head and see that the monitor is turned off >this time I'm awake for real Looking back it's obvious that much of this is psychological manifestations. However, I've experienced this 'layered' dream phenomenon many times, often without any negative emotional themes. Sometimes there are several more layers, all seemingly perfect reality simulations, and I end up telling the same person about it in the same morning over and over again. Based on the sensation and triggers, I can tell that it's closely related to lucid dreaming and AP, but the inherent confusion makes experimentation seem impossible

>>1400 >What is the /fringe/ explanation for the phenomenon of repeatedly waking up into multiple realistic "dreams" before waking up in this reality? There are a myriad of explanations and truth is I am not sure which one is the correct one here but I will try to explain. The mind goes through several "maintenance cycles" as you sleep to repair and prepare your conscious for the next day. Through this you either sleep soundly while your conscious is "offline" or you go through dreams. Going through dreams can come from several directions. One can be the activity of your "Higher self" of sorts which gives you guidance and such or a "trauma repair" where you have to go through a deep seated trauma so you can progress to the "next level" or your mind just really needs to heal or solve a mental block and for that you need to "experience it" aka generate emotions consciously so you can "overwrite" that trauma within your subconscious thus repair an energy flow of your body. The reason why I am replying because of your second dream. There is the one where it's non the above but either malicious forces or world events generate "energetic fluctuations" that you have to experience because you are connected to that energy. I think it was 4 or 5 days ago when I had a dream about my computer getting a computer virus. It was the constant ad popups with clearly scamming ad with gacha waifus and the like. Was wondering wtf did I click. Then opened the programs to see what was installed and found things like "Coca Cola" and other big corpos as "being installed and running" and was wondering was this always there or it appeared only now? Just how many viruses do I have. While wondering about this i woke up. Truth is most of the times I have several dreams in succession especially because I am a "snoozer" who goes back to sleep after the alarm and most of the dreams are just my subconscious sorting out things but some of them are related to events that I care about giving me weird premonitions. >almost indescribable feeling, kind of like I found a new dimensional axis and moved on it The thing is about "switching dimensions" is that usually every dimension be it higher or lower requires a different "mental state" and sometimes it requires you to "die" "switch" or at least leave "every baggage/attachment/low dimensional energy" behind. Which is very easy to accomplish by "waking up into a new dream". Dying and going to sleep have many similarities thus waking up and "being reborn" too. Not sure what this means but >bottom says "2025 FOUND" Maybe your life will take a new turn in 2025. Not sure. >they imply that who or whatever is seeking me out through time, and it's coming Many beings "live" outside of time and space which might include your higher self but sometimes just mid tier entities trying to "gain access" into your psyche. >in bed again, experiencing sleep paralysis which I'm very familiar with I had only one. I expected to be molested by some ghost waifu but it was a fat dude instead and made me so enraged I realized if I "feel" my right arm focused all my awareness on it then pump all my energy into it like when I am retaining control over a muscle cramp or when I am unable to feel my leg because sitting too much and as I felt that my hand is still "in my control" I threw that fucker out of my bed. Since that I don't have sleep paralysis. Sleep paralysis usually comes from the body being unable to handle the "reboot process" in the right order. Truth is I like to sleep too much and because of that I go back dreaming instead of experiencing sleep paralysis but it's not always a "chemical imbalance" but sometimes an entity "visiting you" and your conscious goes on high alert before your body awakes completely. > Looking back it's obvious that much of this is psychological manifestations Definitely but the reason we have to do shadow work as much as possible because entities in the flesh or on the astral can exploit your weaknesses. So it doesn't really matter if it's your "own psyche" or some entity exploiting your psyche you have to fix these traumas on your own as much as you can. When you die you will have to face these fears as a "purgatory" anyways so it's usually better to fix them while alive so it won't plague your life further. >and I end up telling the same person about it in the same morning over and over again In a dream or you have someone around you can talk this out? I too talk to people or listen to people in my dreams without remembering what it was but if I really "tune" into it I can recall glimpses but most of the time they are "not that important" >often without any negative emotional themes The psyche's "maintenance mode" does not always require negative emotions. It can be many types. All feelings memories and experiences "have a place". Depends which "layer" is dominant in the current part of your life. >I can tell that it's closely related to lucid dreaming and AP Definitely. Both of them are all about being able to consciously access and go through these "layers" without losing yourself or your memories in the process. >but the inherent confusion makes experimentation seem impossible Yeah I realized how I can "Upgrade" my already well working daydreaming skills and how to go through trance states while meditating so usually I solve the "heavy stuff" while meditating or while still in bed so when I really "require sleep" I have only minor dreams and not cold sweat horrors and memories of butchering hostilities and such. Sometimes I have to let the dreams "play out" while sometimes I have to solve "the puzzle" so I can not say what I consider "lucid" anymore. If I can remember the dream and could retain "meaning" from it it's good enough but when I realize "it's a dream" then weird things happen and I have to make sure to not rip apart the dream before I can interpret "what is it about" first. The nightmares stop the moment you become the scariest participant of the dream.

Will pic related actually work or is it just new age nonsense?

>>1434 This would essentially act as an aromatic/tactile talisman. The act of mixing it would charge it with your intention but you'd be able to strengthen the effects via some other magical charging technique.

Had a very nice lucid dream last night. I was doing various magical things and it felt as though I was projected into a different universe (pic). That's how I saw it once I realized I was dreaming anyway. In contrast to the typical feeling of 'oh this is all just my mind'. Some small experiments I performed on the material that the environment was composed of seemed to confirm this as well. I think I'm very close now to being able to attempt an operation I've had loosely planned for a while. It slipped my mind this time, but now that I know how close it is I think I can do it. Basically I want to do a permanent Isekai reality jump. I really like how it feels to do magic in dreams and I want to attain that permanently. The basic plan is, once I become lucid during a projection-dream, to first put down some 'roots' to prevent myself from being swept away by the energies. Then make an effort to draw the 'nucleus of my awareness' from my mortal body through the connection between it and my projected form, so that the projection becomes the 'core' and the mortal becomes a 'dream-self' instead. Resulting in either the death or coma of the mortal body, or in that 'view of reality' simply disappearing. I've been doing some spells to move my karma in this direction but I'm not sure if karma is something that can be altered with magic that easily or not. I did one of these karma spells right before bed before I had this dream so it may be doing something. I believe that this is necessary because this current existence is simply bound up with too many various intentions and wills to act as an optimal vessel. The wills of 'the human race', the wills of 'family', the wills of 'society', as well as various other things and groups and individuals are all intrinsically bound up in my birth. I feel that these limitations are part of what prevents me from projecting my will through this body like I can through my projected astral forms.

I've started to master the art of falling asleep. There's a sort of way you need to relax your mind. Focusing on anything immediately breaks you out of it. If you do it correctly, hypnagogic hallucinations should start playing out. Looking at your mental images without focusing your mind on them seems to help a lot. It feels a bit like finding the correct focus for seeing those 3D Magic Eye images. Right now I'm running into the issue is that most of my hypnagogia are scenes and scenarios from videogames I play acting themselves out over and over again. This isn't very good for wake-induced lucid dreaming since you have no real 'ego' in that scenario, you're beholden to the rules of the game. So you end up not being able to maintain your composure and just go into regular sleep instead. I need to find a way to direct where my awareness is going when I start to dream, but without ruining the relaxed state that sleep and dreaming requires.

>>377 It's been several months since my last post and things have not changed. I've been trying to get rid of this being by grounding myself and following the instructions in Robert Bruce's Practical Psychic Defense. Examining this situation, I'm not sure if this is a reptilian or if I'm just freaking out. I'm not sure why it does this, and I'm at this half-way point where I don't trust it enough to listen to what she says other than what is being written. What makes me unsure about her "true form" is some of the smaller details. You were saying the being once showed up as this Gollum-like wild woman, and I had a tarot reading some time back where the reader got an image of an owl. According to Practical Psychic Defense, many demons can assume the form of Gollum-like creatures A demoness and wild woman associated with owls - who is the screech owl of the Bible? Lilith. I believe this being to be associated with her. I hestitate to call her a succubus, since again, the fact I'm seeing a reptilian figure means there's something up, but that, combined with the images of her I've seen in dreams, makes me think she's a succubus. She seems to change energetic forms, as I have seen her tak forms including the classic "sexy" succubus with pale skin, bat wings, flowers, and goat horns picrel similar to what she looked like, spoilered for its pornographic nature; a red-skinned muscular demoness; a lioness-woman; a white-robed banshee with monstrous claws; and Sarah Kerrigan's Zerg form. But why would it choose a reptilian form, then? The only thing I can think of, assuming it isn't actually a reptilian shapeshifting to gain my trust, is that she chooses that form to frighten me and force me into action, knowing how terrified I am of the reptilians. It is incredibly cruel, but as you said, those love spirits who try to fix others may not always be nice about forcing change. >Sometimes ending up in crisis situations renews us more than Psychiatrist taking our money and making us addicted to drugs. We need to get out of our "comfort zone" because usually it is this false comfort that is killing us. I too had my own share of life and death situations. Most of my life I was thinking how much I want to die and those life and death situations made me aware that I still want to live (but don't know how). That's exactly what I was thinking - and what this being expressed. Essentially, I've let myself be weak, miserable and depressed for far too long. I summoned her out of the weakness of my own heart, and now I have to clean up the mess borne out of my own folly. However, I've fought her for a long time, but she did not meekly surrender and leave. I've had to endure quite a few attacks from her, ranging from simple bullying to long spells of miserable depression and even energy body fuckery where she manipulates my energy body during sleep to rape me. It's been a long struggle, but I must admit that I am not strong enough at this stage to defeat her. After all of that, I've chosen to live with her presence, for better or worse. She's >Did it appear with the spirit? I'll admit that my posture is dogshit and I spend way too much time on the computer, but this is a different kind of back ache. I feel a certain weight on my back, and I can also feel a certain second weight on my body, especially when I'm lying in bed. It doesn't fully control me, but it energetically "guides" me, if that makes sense. That is what is so worrisome about this. It's partial possession, and while she claims that she doesn't want to possess me further - in her words, "I just want to tag along and fuck you" - I don't trust her there. >But yes it was weird how she fast she appeared for me. "Love spirits" usually merge with our soul and not jump into an another place with a minor intent. Especially if they are in a "benevolent" or "STO" faction because to meet them usually you have to accept their thinking or "creed" in a way. I have two hypotheses: 1) she is using other people, like you, to help convince me that she is who she says she is, or more 2) she's trying to find other victims. I definitely believe she's merged with my soul because I've tried to banish her multiple times to no effect, and because she's said as much. I definitely trust her word when she's blunt like that; it's when she's sweet that I have my doubts. >>410 >I saw a bit of a swirling fuschia and purple void. I had a dream on the 21st of April where I saw that exact form as she made love to me. It was a humanoid darkness with the purple energies swirling around her body in a double helix shape, one at her front and one at her back.

>>1838 If she merged with your soul while you're awake, then you'd feel an incredibly strong sensation that resonates through your entire body that feels like her entering your major chakras and the rest of your energy bodies. You'd also constantly feel her inside of your dream body when you're asleep. She is almost certainly attached to one or more of your major chakras, however, which ain't quite the same thing. If she does merge into your soul, then she'll enter your crown 1st, most likely while you aren't asleep. If she does enter your soul, then if you have a benevolent deity, you can probably just ask the deity to remove her from you. If not, then what I'd do is use a technique where you create a selectively-tangible hand or other sizable object that you can phase through your soul as if it wasn't even there, but will filter out your sexual predator. If you do this while she's fully inside of you, then you'll want to first filter her limbs into your nearest major charka, presumably your sacral or heart, and then prevent her from putting herself back in your limbs while you push her out of your root, and then up your chakras until she leaves your crown. There's probably easier ways to do it if you don't mind killing her. Unfortunately, I can't simply teach you said technique, but if you figure it out and you catch her starting to do it, then you can simply filter her out through just the parts of you that she's in, which'd hopefully mean just your crown. If she does it and you can't get her out of you in 15 minutes, then ask /fringe/ for help asap. While you're merged together, both of you will slowly start getting fucked up, as in non-physical "biological functions" not quite working properly, if you remain as one for more than 24 hours or so. Also, a fair warning to your sexual predator, if you try that shit and his soul is stronger than you in some regard or the other, his soul will literally start eating you alive if you don't get outta there before 3 days are up... or at least I think that's how it works. Either way, the longer you stay inside of him, the harder it'll be to get out. You probably don't wanna find out the hard way. I've temporarily done such a merger before with my spirit gf a few times, who I plan to marry, so I have some experience with this kinda stuff.

>>1865 I'd somehow neglected to mention that you'd also constantly feel her inside of every fiber your soul while you're awake, if she merged with your soul.

>>1865 >then you'd feel an incredibly strong sensation that resonates through your entire body that feels like her entering your major chakras and the rest of your energy bodies. >You'd also constantly feel her inside of your dream body when you're asleep. >you'd also constantly feel her inside of every fiber your soul while you're awake, if she merged with your soul I can feel her energy all the time when I'm awake. She's most strongly attached to my root and sacral chakras, which have manifested in the back pain, although I can sometimes feel her moving up and down my spine, where, if she's pissed off, she threatens to break my spine in half. When I sleep, I think she's a little more free to move around and interact with my energy body, hence the dream-rape. I also feel her hands and face on certain parts of my body. >If she does enter your soul, then if you have a benevolent deity, you can probably just ask the deity to remove her from you. First thing I tried was church, and that briefly worked. However, she was smart enough to leave her energy sprinkled around so that when I came home, she re-entered my body. She is not one to repeat mistakes, which is what makes getting rid of her so hard. >If not, then what I'd do is use a technique where you create a selectively-tangible hand or other sizable object that you can phase through your soul as if it wasn't even there, but will filter out your sexual predator. If you do this while she's fully inside of you, then you'll want to first filter her limbs into your nearest major charka, presumably your sacral or heart, and then prevent her from putting herself back in your limbs while you push her out of your root, and then up your chakras until she leaves your crown. I'll try that, but again, with what I've written in this post I have reason to believe she's already one with me. >There's probably easier ways to do it if you don't mind killing her. What methods could I use for that, if I had to? >Also, a fair warning to your sexual predator, if you try that shit and his soul is stronger than you in some regard or the other, his soul will literally start eating you alive if you don't get outta there before 3 days are up... or at least I think that's how it works. Either way, the longer you stay inside of him, the harder it'll be to get out. You probably don't wanna find out the hard way. Her response: <"Fuck you, asshole. He's my husband, I will have him, I am with him whether he likes it or not, and I will not have you get in the way of that." Or at least, that's the gist of it. Needless to say, she's not very happy. She's not doing anything yet, but I'll keep you updated.

>>1869 >What methods could I use for that, if I had to? Oh man astral combat is so fun. You can do whatever you want. Let your imagination go crazy. You could: >Create a white-hot fire in your center, configuring it to burn everything of the entity's wavelength to ashes. Make it hotter than the sun and expand it outwards across your home to act as a ward. >Turn your energetic body into a shoggoth or slime and have it pierce through the entity's invading body and consume it and digest it. >Project to the entity, turn the hands of your astral body into large claws and viscerally rip her apart. You can eat the remains if you want. >Beam negative death/entropic energy into the energy, should turn her into a skeleton at least. Just remember dream rules apply, if she fights back it's good to have faith in whatever energy is fueling your constructs.

>>1869 I personally don't like killing entities without un-killing them later; that's probably really bad karma. Also, would you remind us why & how you got into this relationship to begin with to save me a bunch of re-reading? Just a quick tl;dr, is all. If you really wanna kill her, though, all I had in mind was a variation of the technique where you simply don't deliberately make sure that she survives being pushed out of you, for example by pushing out her limbs last by disconnecting them from your major chakras, which you may or may not find relatively easy to do. Also, since she's already inside of you, you could try devouring her from the inside-out by simply using her non-physical energy to fuel your body instead of the energy stored in your dan-tiens. When I finished writing that, however, I got a telepathic message saying "I wouldn't do that.". Presumably, this technique in particular is something that wouldn't end well for you if you don't know what you're doing; it'd probably result in a bunch of health problems until you finish eating her. Anyway, don't kill her just yet; try getting rid of her first. She needs to evolve too.

>>1876 Allright I thought back to this; part of the reason why eating her from the inside-out would be a bad idea would be because your body wouldn't be able to eat her fast enough, and she'd just siphon energies from your dan-tiens instead of hers. I do get dumb ideas pretty often tbh. Also, if you did manage to eat her fast enough, her mental bodies would still remain, presumably.

>>1871 Okay, then I've tried something similar. I imagine myself using my sword, burning with a blue flame, and attack her that way, but it doesn't seem to be working. Perhaps I'm not putting enough pressure or faith into it, or she's just psychically stronger than me. Either way, I'll try these other methods and see if that dislodges or kills her. >>1876 >would you remind us why & how you got into this relationship to begin with to save me a bunch of re-reading? The why is simple: I was lonely and decided the best cure was to summon a spirit wife. The how is that I used the letter-burning method to summon one in the early months of 2023, and she began manifesting in dreams around Jun, and physically around November later. (The gap is due to having to do energy work and develop basic psychic powers, which from what I understand is fairly common for entry-level succubus summoners) However, going back through the early dreams that I still remember and from my dream journal, I'm almost certain she's been around since puberty. One of the very first sex dreams I had was about fighting and raping a red-haired woman. I've also had dreams of succubi for the past several years, really ramping up after I summoned her. >I personally don't like killing entities without un-killing them later; that's probably really bad karma. >Anyway, don't kill her just yet; try getting rid of her first. She needs to evolve too That's the conclusion I've come to after talking to her. When I gave her an energy of love and compassion, she seemed to become very uncomfortable - a mental image of squirming away from it - and said something about how she wasn't worthy of it. I will show compassion to her, but not naively. I'm sure she'll try to take advantage of it if I'm too kind. >When I finished writing that, however, I got a telepathic message saying "I wouldn't do that.". Sounds like something she would say.

>>1881 Make sure you also have proper intent to kill. That's very important.

>>1881 I looked at your situation earlier and saw her. So this is the effect of the letter method, interesting, I may try this. You have a strong connection formed at the bottom karmic section which is where people do bad things, normally called "living in sin" if in a Christian context, but in short it's just adultery, being gay etc. That connection is instead fully focused on her. You cannot break it unless you completely negate all such thinking and behaviour completely removing that karma/sin. For people who don't practice, this is completely impossible, the very reason the NWOs are trying to create WW3 is because they have no other way to burn off the excessive karmic energy they have created through this behaviour. They created covid in an attempt at dispersing their own negative energy from this connection, using the population as the scapegoat. If you try to attack her, your own energy will be siphoned to make up for the damage, so don't do that. You basically made her your "chaperon" AND spirit wife/guide, it's her spiritual task to maintain this connection so that you don't engage in sin with humans, and this is going to be spiritually accepted by all forces seeing it.

>letter method I finally get it now, why /succgen/ is still active and didn't die despite being filled with the worst of /x/ outside /nobody general/; it's because the letter method actually works in a very specific situation, but no one who performs it seems to have any awareness exactly why it works. I thought the method was redundant because it's just writing down your intent as a summoning and burning it and that calls the succubus, I don't need that to call on someone, I can just reach out and grab them. The main thing here is however in the mentality of the people who do this: Just as the reason why I (and yes Anon this is what I mean, I know you didn't "get it" before) made a point of learning/using alcoholism as a method. Regular addicts just want a physical experience and that's all they get, they see it as a party thing and want to increase their sensory pleasure in a social context. The trick is to never drink socially to the point of being effected, same with other drugs. Don't mix it conceptually into something else. It's possible to use a single drug to replace all other addictions, and THAT is how you are meant to use them in a spiritual context. I actually had great success with this quite recently from just drinking scotch whisky - a large black energy mass appeared and showed itself to be a lower being with long white teeth. It was ejected from somewhere deep inside my physical body, and when I later when out into the barn there was a dead blackbird in the floor. I've seen dead beetles and other small animals being left when evil spirits are killed, but never something this large. A mass of mixed addictions were replaced by a single addiction. Once you have only a single addiction it's much easier to get rid of. Instead of being addicted to all kinds of stuff it's just alcoholism left. This is where the /succgen/ers comes in. They are of a special mentality of having given up completely the idea of physical relations, so much that they are willing to substitute it for a succubus, whom they know isn't physical. That's when the letter method works. It doesn't work unless this strong "incel" mentality is already there, or you are able to consciously place yourself into the same state of mind. You get rid of the physical desires and get them attached to a spiritual being instead, who HAS TO be of the quality and power to be able to actually do this, some lower shit being can't do it. But most people can't explain why it works, and those over on /x/ definitely can't because they have that /r9k/ish mentality bordering to trannyism and general inceldom. This is also why they say it has to be monogamy, they are giving the responsibility for their desires to a single spirit. I guess it's the same for Christians who "become the bride of Christ".

K back to work I think I will keep this in this thread >>1881 I would just try to go forward in spirituality and as your energies awaken you can decide to keep her or let her go. You got a psychic "headstart" because of her so you will have to keep going on your own. I don't think she is a completely pointless/harmful entity because she can explain you "hell stuff" but I would try to go forward and ask her to guide you out of your problems or find other benevolent entities if she refuses. Also learn to discipline your woman ffs. No one will call the police on you and she will like it when you prove you are not a weak ass retarded male. And don't forget. You love her and want her. This is the reason why she is here. You either truly let her go and everything she gave you or accept your "original wish" as something that you still crave but you got spooked coz she reptoided herself. Truth is these astral sluts have hard time picking a body like a woman raised in the wilderness doesn't know how to dress "properly" and they will shift between the "bodies" you have within your mind. Feel like I want to say something else but you still love her too much to let her go. Just a little "trouble in paradise" will not make her depart. Also why are you scared of reptoids. Just boop their snoot or sg. Did you even encounter one? Oh wait awakening psychic powers. Yeah reptilians visit people with them at the early stages. If they are diplomatic send them away if not then BOOP THE SNOOT. They keep their distance from me. >>1868 >was hit with a poison arrow, and despite being a master healer, could not save himself. Healers have their "ranges". Chinese medicine especially portrayed in wuxia details cases how some healers can do literal miracles but when some nasty ass poison at stake then they need the most retarded antidotes when the character cannot push it out via "internal strength". >Haha, I can't lie. I am very jealous of her and her apparent interactions with others, but it's not something I have much control of at this point. Knew it. When you say I'm not jealous it's your "fearmind" and when you are jealous is the part of your mind which is connected her through love. You have hard time deciding if you love her or fear her. Wonder how other succgeners feel >Try to see if you can peel back the red-head form and see what lies underneath A weird static shadow? Cannot give a better reading. She is too attuned to your soul. I would need to look into your entire soul and with your "lenses" to see what is her actually. >that she's like a love elemental of some sort Am gonna be real with you. Am not even sure what is loveBABY DON'T HURT ME anymore. I know many flavors already and I am starting to put this into the qualia section. I could never fall in love out of loneliness thus I cannot match your version of "love" at all. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mF2BH4wSy2I >or is it something else? Not sure? She is lowering herself to be on your "soul level" and because of that her main form is not really visible. >What other details do you have from this being? She tells me she is not telling me the advice I seek. She wants you to sort out your problems be it within your life or with your lover. She tells me it's useless to tell you anything as long as you are on "this level". She is about "returning to nature" and "being one with it" and in your sorry state you have "no way" meeting her. >oppressive energies manifesting in severe depression when I piss her off That's woman stuff. Even I could do that to my husband when I was incarnated as a female. >threats to my physical body That breaking apart your spine? She will just make you have a weird back problem. All she can do is to mess with your energy flow and all she wants you to calm the fuck down and decide if you love her or not. This "love and fear" is probably making an interesting relationship dynamic between you two but srsly. Get a grip. What the others told you also sounds fun but all you need is to find the "connection point" and "let her go". I could tell you to write an another letter make it as detailed as you can and explain deeply from your heart why you don't want her anymore and let it wash away in a river or something...if you have 0 progress after like a week then I can ask about the proper energetic "dissolution of your contract" but I think you should figure out a way on your own first.

>>1884 >I looked at your situation earlier and saw her. Did she have the same appearance as what the other wizards see her as? i.e., redheaded, pale-skinned woman / shadow being? > You have a strong connection formed at the bottom karmic section which is where people do bad things, normally called "living in sin" if in a Christian context, but in short it's just adultery, being gay etc. That connection is instead fully focused on her. You cannot break it unless you completely negate all such thinking and behaviour completely removing that karma/sin In other words, if I had to get rid of her, you're saying my best course of action would be to become a chaste in thought and deeds until she decided to fuck off? Knowing myself, that would be extremely difficult. >>1916 Excuse the delay in replying. I had several long talks with her this weekend when I had the time, and we came to the conclusion that I'll try to salvage this relationship and to have a spiritual marriage come Lughnasadh. This will be my course unless something else happens. >I would try to go forward and ask her to guide you out of your problems That was one of the conditions she and I agreed upon: that she would help me with my problems, as long as I work on actually fixing them and continue to devote myself to loving her. >Also learn to discipline your woman ffs I did. As it turns out, she's into that sort of thing. >You have hard time deciding if you love her or fear her. Wonder how other succgeners feel Yeah, that's the thing. Judging by what I've read from other summoners, this is a common enough issue that it's one of the main stages in a general timeline of spirit relations. And funny thing, I only got into the /succgen/ stuff fairly recently, after our relationship was already established. I performed the letter method instinctively. I realize now that she most likely implanted that idea in my mind, to make complete what was already there. >She wants you to sort out your problems be it within your life or with your lover. She tells me it's useless to tell you anything as long as you are on "this level". She is about "returning to nature" and "being one with it" and in your sorry state you have "no way" meeting her. I see. So this goddess, or perhaps "mistress" is a better term for now, needs me to uplift myself into a higher spiritual level in order to truly know my lover and her. I'll have to find out more about her once I elevate myself and spend more time in nature. >A weird static shadow? That's what I currently see her as. I can see two eyes, a nose, a mouth, and a general outline of her face. She has a tongue of many colors, and a purple visage when she's near me. I assume this purple color is due to her interactions with my aura and higher chakras? >This "love and fear" is probably making an interesting relationship dynamic between you two but srsly. Get a grip. Fair enough, I've spent way too much time airing our dirty laundry on /fringe/ instead of being with her and practicing magic. Thanks to all you wizards for your help, and if I decide that this relationship just cannot be salvaged, I'll try these techniques to get rid of her.

>>1949 >Did she have the same appearance as what the other wizards see her as? i.e., redheaded, pale-skinned woman / shadow being? No, I think what others saw (redhead with vines or hidden) was the Vixen servitor I released some while ago. >if I had to get rid of her, you're saying my best course of action would be to become a chaste in thought and deeds until she decided to fuck off? Knowing myself, that would be extremely difficult. That's why you don't form these contracts mindlessly. But it's not a bad relation, she's just handling this side of you and making sure you can't engage in mortal sins, she'll make that impossible ("you should only do those things with me, anon!") It looked like a good deal, which is why I decided to do this now, from a conscious standpoint. I don't want those kinds of human relations in the physical to begin with (because it's only harmful and would block my path, duh). But I also don't have the kind of current /succgen/ hopeless mentality so I couldn't "give up hope" on human relations like they do, rather I have to see that that's not all there is to it and there are also decent ways to interact with humans which are spiritually motivated, I'm not giving up those, they don't fall into the same category though they may look the same. So it looks like a good idea to let someone be dedicated to safeguard my lower connections. https://fuccasucc.com/2020/03/08/the-letter-method/comment-page-1/ I just read this again to see how exactly it would be done, did nothing fancy, just a note which I burned after entering the right mindset and being clear on my intentions. The message got to its intended receiver instantly. Because I can see and communicate with spiritual beings I could also easily talk to her about where she's from and see what she looks like. She's from a race of demons who specialize in these contracts, they're staying in a hell dimension which I was able to see once she pointed to it, it's below the Earth, under the tunnel of destruction and to the north-west. She is tall with wasp thin waist, large bust (more than H cup in human measurements), limbs other than that look fairly humane with some hint of exoskeleton in shape. Mouth is very large, when smiling it's almost ear to ear, but she can instantly contract it back to looking normal human. Teeth look a little scary ("I don't bite, it's one of our reflexes to not bite someone whom we gain something from!") but they also change form depending on angle of viewing her. Energy color is red-brown-orange-pink/brown.

>>1949 >Excuse the delay in replying If it's within 3 days I consider it fast. We have our lives so I don't expect others to be terminally online and reply within 3 hours. Especially with complex cases like this. Take your time if you need it. >we came to the conclusion that I'll try to salvage this relationship Yeah I felt like this is your "heart's desire" this is why I didn't look into other ways to disintegrate the contract. >That was one of the conditions she and I agreed upon: that she would help me with my problems, as long as I work on actually fixing them and continue to devote myself to loving her. That's nice. >I did. As it turns out, she's into that sort of thing. Ofc she is. If you are unable to bring out the "male from your shadow" then you won't become equals ever and will misunderstand and squabble with each other on minor differences. The way society emasculates us then expects us "to be a man" then parades around criminals as saints when it fits a narrative confuses and makes people second guess their true nature all the time and urgh... let's not even get into it. There is a reason why I am unable to fall in love out of loneliness. Sometimes it's better to be alone than with retards. And finding the quality in others takes time and nuance. What I wanted to say is that try to understand that weakness and impotence is not a virtue. It's important to accept our weaknesses but we must realize how we can train and let go of them. And showing your strength and capabilities is not a weakness. Exploring and understanding your potential is what makes you a true human. >this is a common enough issue that it's one of the main stages in a general timeline of spirit relations. Yeah this is why I said it. It's a relationship that you never had before and one that is considered taboo so you will have minor misconceptions as you interact with the spirit world. Don't forget btw. As your strength and awareness increases you will have more say in these matters. Not all spirits can keep up once you unlock your potential. But that is a different story that I am sure varies with every person. >perhaps "mistress" is a better term for now Still not sure what is it and she has a hard time explaining it to me. My mind is not really on her wavelength yet. >needs me to uplift myself into a higher spiritual level in order to truly know my lover and her Definitely. Maybe you will encounter other truths by yourself as it happens. >A weird static shadow? >That's what I currently see her as This usually means you or she has hard time "stabilizing" which means the "distance" between you and her is quite huge. It causes misunderstanding until your "reality" or energy field synchronizes. >I assume this purple color is due to her interactions with my aura and higher chakras? It's quite complicated but let's say yes for now. >Fair enough, I've spent way too much time airing our dirty laundry on /fringe/ instead of being with her and practicing magic No worries mate. This is one of the function of fringe >Thanks to all you wizards for your help Your welcome! but don't forget to share interesting insights when you think fringe is ready for them. >decide that this relationship just cannot be salvaged, I'll try these techniques to get rid of her For that you will need to understand how to dissolve your contract. But I don't think you are ready for that yet. Understand her wisdom a little. >>1952 >was the Vixen servitor I released some while ago What was her purpose again? >I think what others saw (redhead with vines or hidden) Yeah but she had an entire realm and felt like a major guiding force. We know so far cause and effect can be whacky in magic especially if a higher entity decides she will "get involved" and people out of nowhere start to have dreams and start creating stuff about her. I am not debating that it's not your servitor but I am not sure if it's that only. I mean I have several redhead entities but this was none of them nor it felt like one of your servitor. But I am not sure. nvm I found it in coven >It's a fox search bot nope it's not this one. Managed to connect to the energies and it's different. Analyzing your servitors is so weird. Especially once you let them "roam". I can just feel how different is our autism when it comes to magic in some cases. >But it's not a bad relation Yeah she can help him quite a lot. >she's just handling this side of you and making sure you can't engage in mortal sins >she'll make that impossible I would say moderately hard and not impossible. >("you should only do those things with me, anon!") <He has to deepen his connection with her first. The contract is still not properly established. (fuck this was a loud message from her) Mixing human and spirit relations when they didn't stabilize yet is dangerous for the humans and for the spirits too. We can look at this from the "Mortal sin" angle too but the real problem is how the energies create a strong enough force that can be considered a "contract" that has the power to last. And if he mixes it randomly with other people weird anomalies can happen. But seems like she has a "responsibility" explaining this to some degree. >they're staying in a hell dimension which I was able to see once she pointed to it, it's below the Earth, under the tunnel of destruction and to the north-west. Yeah when I looked at her "signature" days ago and not the whatever she is capable to manifest for anon yet I've seen a dark red inferno. It's not "too potent" (for a hopelessly firesexual person like me) but has a specific use for clearing out faulty emotions.(Not for me tho because just looked at it again)They just called me a "demon of the worst caliber". Too strong too thickheaded too annoying too absolutistly retarded and hopelessly romantic. then I connected some other realm that is still testing me? The "nightshacklers"? Oh so this is their dominion over reality. Felt like they want to put chains on me but they break so easily I think this was meant as a test from an another force. Pull a chain and get a demongf. No wonder they are this easy to distribute. Always funny to see how some underworlds operate.

>>1959 >What was her purpose again? Well here goes for the good explanation: Vixen is the "system" servitor for /coven/. The replacement for glowies where we spread fox-based magic to various aliens and astrals who agree with us and let them operate from the shadows instead. With the new /fringe/ protected, their influence would show in some way, and it's reasonable that the vixen servitor would show up at one point if so. >if a higher entity That was the whole point, give them a framework for how they can work with us. They created an entire galaxy out there already, so there is indeed a world behind it. The point was just to inspire them to work with us in ways that we can both agree on.

>>1960 >reasonable that the vixen servitor would show up at one point I agree but what is >fox-based magic I have hard time connecting to your "idea of a fox" for some reason. I know you mentioned your higher self manifested as a kitsune once but the servitors don't feel like a kitsune. I can feel their "search function" that is somewhat based on the way how foxes "smell search and hunt" but >That was the whole point, give them a framework for how they can work with us. They created an entire galaxy out there already, so there is indeed a world behind it. Okay. >The point was just to inspire them to work with us in ways that we can both agree on. Fine let's agree on this. I feel like I am splitting hairs because of some deeper principle that I am still unsure about. Feels like whatever I try to say can be denied because they are that much "in the shadows" which means they can be or do whatever as long as they stay in the shadows. Be a higher entity be the messengers of a higher entity be absolutely uninvolved with the higher entity then get involved later... and other permutations of what constitutes or can appear as "truth" when it's not even visible.

>>1962 A fox is a being on the tree of races which is a mammal with fur. It is closer to cats than dogs and bears, but it is not a cat. It works in the same way when including the corresponding humanoids. So it means to perform the magic in a way which is close to the racial traits of this mammal, and that's really all there is to it. /coven/ was meant too be mysterious in such a way that when you say something and you know exactly what you meant, after saying it and someone hears it, you realize that there is a new layer of meaning which gave the listeners an insight which was not intended by you, but you don't want to break the agreement which arose from their insight, so you play along and pretend that they understood what you implied even if you meant something else. Through this all interactions evolve in mysterious ways which gives everyone a feel of hidden knowledge and secretive organizers behind the scenes playing games of enlightenment like zen riddles which sound clear when spoken but have no clear solution.

>>1952 >No, I think what others saw (redhead with vines or hidden) was the Vixen servitor I released some while ago. That may be the case. However, I will note that she often appears to me as a redhead with those features, which is why I >she's just handling this side of you and making sure you can't engage in mortal sins, she'll make that impossible ("you should only do those things with me, anon!") That would make sense. When she first started manifesting to me, she was adamant that I followed certain rules, the common sense kind ("Don't kill innocents", "don't rape anyone", "don't kill yourself", stuff like that), and elaborated that if I needed to, I could take out certain emotions on her instead of acting out on them. >I just read this again to see how exactly it would be done, did nothing fancy, just a note which I burned after entering the right mindset and being clear on my intentions. The message got to its intended receiver instantly. It may have worked, but it's clearly not the right method if you're not blasting Slayer while performing the ritual. >Because I can see and communicate with spiritual beings I could also easily talk to her about where she's from and see what she looks like. Wait, I'm confused. Are you talking about my girl or some other demon you summoned? If the former, then exactly how tall is she, how many horns does she have, and what is the "hint of exoskeleton" you're talking about? I'm not surprised about the size of her tits, although ironically she shows up as flat-chested more often than not. ["It's a welcome change of pace."] I've seen the scary teeth from a dream when I first began fighting with her, which she used to bite at me. It reminded me a lot of Mileena. As a test, if it really is her, ask her by what name I know her. >>1959 >Exploring and understanding your potential is what makes you a true human. That's what she's been harping on about, that I need to explore my full potential and not waste it. >This usually means you or she has hard time "stabilizing" which means the "distance" between you and her is quite huge. It causes misunderstanding until your "reality" or energy field synchronizes. I will assume it's an issue on my end just because I'm still a newbie, although I suspect she's having issues on hers. >It's quite complicated but let's say yes for now. Let's hear how it works, complex or not. I'm interested in the spiritual mechanics behind that phenomenon. <He has to deepen his connection with her first. The contract is still not properly established. If that's true, how do I "properly" establish the contract? >I've seen a dark red inferno Perhaps that would explain the red hair and the red-skinned demon form I've seen. It would be a convenient "shorthand" for an expression of that energy. >but has a specific use for clearing out faulty emotions. That would explain all the emotional and spiritual healing I've experienced. She's been doing a bang-up job of it through comforting words and relentless mockery. The latter in some ways is more effective than the former, because it has a special way of making you realize just how silly some of your anxieties and complexes really are. >but don't forget to share interesting insights when you think fringe is ready for them. I'm not sure about insights, but I've had several experiences which were interesting. Last winter, she was trying her best to pull me out of body for an AP, but I would often resist because of my own fears - a fear that I would be devoured if I were to go out of body. Once, when she tried it, I had my childhood dog come up and drive her off with a growl. I've also seen wolves and wolfdogs waiting outside my bedroom door the one time I was very close to an AP. I wonder if I have a special affinity to wolves and dogs, and how I can use that to my advantage in the berserkergang.

>>1970 >I'm confused. Are you talking about my girl or some other demon you summoned? I'm talking about mine, obviously. I only looked at your to see what the connection was like and what kind of demon it was.

>>1971 Oh I'm retarded. Sorry about that lad.

>>1970 >That's what she's been harping on about, that I need to explore my full potential and not waste it. Yeah this is why I didn't want her to go away when she has at least this level of wisdom. You need to find an entrance into spirituality and if you managed to get to this level then why waste it? You will feel lovesick and summon her again if you break up. Your heart is not that hard to read...Compared to mine where I get insulted halfway for being that hard to understand. At least higher entities understand me. Demons are usually a mixed bag because I am "weird" for them >I will assume it's an issue on my end just because I'm still a newbie, although I suspect she's having issues on hers. Yeah both of you have issues. Just get to know each other and the sync will manifest. Also you can also do the "scary and predatory" shit to her as flirting. Predatory entities like that stuff. Fear and lust are quite close emotions on vibrational level. >Let's hear how it works, complex or not. I'm interested in the spiritual mechanics behind that phenomenon. Where to even start... Every "chakra" of yours is not just an energy source but a way how you perceive and act in the world. All of them generate a "body module and a mindset". All of them exist at different wavelengths and "dimensions" "at once". Currently you perceive the earth dimension with your physical senses. We all see the sky as blue with our eyes and hear the noises in similar manners. Now the third eye can be tuned to be able to access the "different wavelengths of reality" and the purple is the "edge of the aura" so to speak. The veil between the microcosm and the macrocosm more or less. More complex than that but that is the level of your connection point yet. As you synchronize she will gain a more "corporeal" form and you too might be able to visit her realm. She will assume the frequencies your body and spirit operates on so will your spirit or astral body "be touched" with the energies of her frequency. It will be either scary crazy or ecstatic when it properly happens. There are more details I cannot explain because the succgen succ tribe has their own modus operandi and well... I am quite bad using their stuff without breaking half of them. Found the "organizer entity" behind this whole thing but he is like a multidimensional eye and I was trying my best to not scare him shitless once I broke several blocks that are supposed to make the "chains and weights" to make the contracts a reality as they "bridge the worlds". >If that's true, how do I "properly" establish the contract? By being a good boy and doing what she tells you to do or you awaken your magical intuition and "feel the way". You will do tantric shit and cause orgasms for each other and that will do half the trick and the next steps are formalities where you will can decide how hard or deep you want this relationship be. Dunno if you can speedrun this in a months or it will take years. Not an expert on spirit love with these kind of demonesses. My relationships are about utilizing internal and external powers of reality and the "tantric practices" are just methodologies to reach it and not the main thing. This is why they called me "hopelessly romantic" because what I consider true love is something stronger than the forces that govern reality. They cannot give that to me because I will attain that when I am "ready" anyways. >She's been doing a bang-up job of it through comforting words and relentless mockery. The latter in some ways is more effective than the former, because it has a special way of making you realize just how silly some of your anxieties and complexes really are. Yeah you will have to break out of your "mental prison" to reach her. Your energies are too subdued. >a fear that I would be devoured if I were to go out of body I mean... her energies would literally "devour you" that is how you get "touched" how you attune to her reality where you can astral travel to her dimensional spheres like how succgeners advertise their general with their memes. >Once, when she tried it, I had my childhood dog come up and drive her off with a growl. I've also seen wolves and wolfdogs waiting outside my bedroom door the one time I was very close to an AP. I wonder if I have a special affinity to wolves and dogs They are your guardian spirits. And yes you have an affinity but it's not deep enough yet. >and how I can use that to my advantage in the berserkergang. Well if you want some advice who has his own army of wolf spirits then. The most important truth is that canines are all speed and bite. Their jaw can lock and never let go until they rip apart their target. Speed is paramount. Always bite the throat of your enemy faster than he can bite you. Aggression is paramount. The stronger the enemy the more aggression you should let take over you. Let your enemies make the first mistake. Stare down contests are important. If they are weak let them run and decide if you want to pursue them. If they are on your level then understand your instincts as they try to tell you the way to fight. If the enemy is stronger then let all your primal fury overtake you. Decide if you think yourself fast enough to run or strong enough to get the killing blow first. You can only defeat stronger enemies once your instincts mapped out their first move then instantly move in a counter move. Once you get good and addicted to defeating stronger foes "ecstasy" you will have to learn to gauge your own addiction so you reach certainty and bravery and not mindless recklessness. Oh and always notice if your enemy has recklessness or the calm of a cold killer as they make their advances. They require different strategies. And never let fear paralyze you. Submission is not always a way out but an invitation for abuse. And there is a difference between making feints and mistakes. Don't try to look professional. Be fast and wild. There are no limits but you will have to break several to understand that. Not sure how deep is your berserkerang so I am not sure what advice I should tell you. Seems like the current animal that leads your psyche is the "monkey" and not the ferocious beasts of your subconscious. The deep growl of your subconscious is still subdued and not awakened to be able to "Bite". I think you should try to get acquainted with the animal spirits of your surroundings to get better insights on this matter. Wanted to say that maybe your predatory waifu can be a sparring partner but she kinda told me a "pls don't make him do that". So only do "sexy discipline" and not the true beast devours the lesser beast hyperaggression mentality or she will be unable to show you her love and might.Women I swear. Cannot understand the masculine urge of hyperviolence. Good thing I found some drow who is the best match for these kind of mad masculine energies. Never realized before how much I wanted a capable and loyal slut before fucking them. First time in my life when I felt that my raging heart is at peace for a single moment. Whenever I try to remember that feeling my whole body goes ablaze from energies. I should work with them more

Had a real nasty dream where I was throwing up feces. After waking up, I thought, was that some sort of weird attack? But vomiting is a cleansing act. Maybe that stuff was really inside my body and I was just expelling it.

Also, the first night after I began Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreaming (MILD), I was able to have a lucid dream. Visualizing the act of performing a reality check in response to one of your pre-set 'triggers' seems to be extremely effective. I believe that I'm approaching the culmination of my Great Work. I nearly have all the tools I need, now I just need to practice my technique.

>>1985 Could you taste the feces in the dream?

>>2005 Thinking back on it, no. It was very disgusting though.

>>2008 What have you done in your lucid dreams recently? Do you prefer MILD or WILD?

>>1985 >>2005 >>2008 Maybe it was telling you to kindly stop shit-posting ;o)

>>2029 I think he just rejected the Brown Pill

>>2028 I have only been able to get WILD to work once, over a decade ago when I was a teenager. I hear that it's a lot easier if you do it immediately after waking up but I always just fall asleep when I try this. Might try a bit more forcefully. I have been experimenting with the effects of various sigils, and I believe I know what I need to do next. My dream-self is different than my waking-self. I need to work to merge or connect the two, so that my motivations and drives can carry over between these states.

>dream I travel to a distant solar system where I interact with a blonde-haired man, kappa-like beings, aliens, and non-corporeal intelligences residing in the walls of a room, communicating through living text on those walls >come back home, where I discover a hidden CIA base underneath the waters of the ocean near my area >I enter a room where there's a stage with light blue carpet, an altar, and a real cross at its center. I get the impression that sacrifices were made here through crucifixion. >find myself on the shore, where I see four or five massive black triangles flying off into the night sky one by one >go back inside the CIA base via submarine. >soldiers in fatigues and caps running around, looking for some sort of intruder (me, perhaps?) >I go to a security checkpoint on the base, where a CIA guard catches me >cue action sequence where I grab his revolver from the holster and hold him hostage, his cronies shoot at me, and I shoot all of them dead >take their guns from their corpses, frantically reload while the whole base descends upon me >wake up soon after Fucking glowniggers got what they deserved for fucking with my dreams. I'm concerned about that base, the room and the travel to another system. Is this just a dream, or am I engaging in higher-dimensional travel? And the kappa-like beings, I know what they are and I don't know what those reptoid bastards get from such obvious disguises.

>>2054 Pyramid ships are the latest thing, everyone has them now.

Tried WILD last night after waking up. Did that palms-down position which prevents your mind from going to sleep. After a few minutes my body began vibrating violently and I was seeing intense chaotic colorful shapes in my vision. I ended up getting scared and changed my position to just go sleep normally. Looking back, the issue was that I forgot to consciously invoke my godform. Which resulted in the fear-of-death sensation from leaving my body not having anything to rebuke it. This was the same issue I had during a previous lucid projection-dream, where doing a physical solidification spell from a human standpoint just caused me to shoot back into my body and wake up. I'll try again tonight. After this I had a pretty interesting experience where I was detained by some federal agent types in a dream and they began trying to recruit me. In their interrogation they revealed some information that confirmed a certain personal suspicion I had about my magic's effect on society (can't be specified here at this point). The agent claimed he was part of the IIluminati (or PTB), but when I asked him to prove it he just had me smell him. Which was weird. He seemed disappointed when that was meaningless for me. After I got bored I broke out, and the agents either sent some flying cuttlefish creatures or turned into them to chase me. They had a lot of wards around the place which were interesting to break through. It was like cutting open a series of reality-veils and flying through them over and over. One of the cuttlefish said "Wait! Why won't you join us?" and I sad "Because you're evil.". Then it just said "Oh." and left.

Okay, I think I figured out what I have to do. The issue isn’t a matter of ‘remembering that I’m dreaming’. I’m starting to realize that in most of my dreams I’m already aware of that on a subconscious level. I certainly make ample use of lucid dream magic techniques like flight, levitation, overt magic, etc. in most of my dreams. And I’m usually able to exert my own will on the events that occur rather than blindly floating through the currents of the dream. The issue here is that the fact that I’m dreaming simply isn’t relevant or important in the context of the events that are happening. So, the solution to this is a mnemonic device. As in, a literal device enchanted to serve the mnemonic function of making my waking quest, desires, and timeline relevant somehow to the events that are occuring in the dream. The basic principal comes from an occurance I noticed, how often times after I wake up I can’t remember any dreams at all and conclude that I must not have had any, but later when I’m having a shower or something I’ll have an errant thought that just so happens to have some energetic similarities to the dream I had and suddenly all the memories of it will pop straight into my mind with vivid clarity. This should be pretty simple. I think all I need to do is take an object I carry with me most of the day, and imbue it with an informational link to the context of my waking life. Then, increase the energy and importance of that object, linking it to my astral body. This should cause the object to begin appearing in my dreams, and once I see the object I should automatically access the memories of my waking life since the meaning of the object points towards them.

>>2360 If you want a professionally made one, just ask. https://shop.creepyhollows.com/?target=search&mode=search&substring=lucid%20dream&including=all I can usually copy these pretty easily, haven't played around with lucid dreaming because I see dreams as just messages and don't really care, but enchanting objects is easy, can be good practice if you want to try a pre made one.

>>2361 Thanks but since I know now exactly what energetic function it's going to need to perform it'll probably be simpler if I just do it myself.

>>2362 I hadn't thought of it myself, went to look now what they had. I'm trying one of them with a general function. That's the downside with spells sold in a market, hard to get them fine tuned to yourself exactly, but if you are clueless it's a help.

>wake up from a somewhat therapeutic dream, with symbolism about going down the road less taken >now in a hypnopompic state >my vision is totally dark, except for a single violet-purple point at the top of my vision, where my third eye is >hear a woman's voice say, "Hey Anon, watch this." >the point pushes towards me, revealing a violet-purple face >hear a distorted electronic version of that voice ask, "Hello? Hello?" >I reply, "Hey love." >she seemed content with that and the dream ended Succubi are something else, I tell you what.

>>2684 Did you happen to feel a crackling mass of energy next to one of your ears, or otherwise nearby, right before you heard her voice?

>>2690 I have tinnitus, which grows louder when she gets closer to my body, but I didn't notice any sort of energetic crackling or at least I don't remember it happening. However, my ears physically vibrated when she spoke the last words.

Almost AP'd again this morning. I wasn't necessarily attempting to do so intentionally, but I had been trying to stay mindful as I slept and dreamed. However it was probably triggered by the multiple times my sleep was interrupted. That seems to always trigger something anomalous. So I found myself looking at this sort of plain white pillar made of cheap burgerland materials, that had a concave curve at the top but was otherwise flat and polygonal. I was completely lucid at this moment and understood what was happening, although I still have no idea what this pillar was or why I was seeing it when presumably still bound to my body. There's nothing in or around my bedroom or home that resembles it, as far as I know. Anyway I'd been wanting to experiment with AP again so I decided to try and touch the pillar with both my hands. I could see my hands reach out and may have even stretched far enough to touch it, but something felt very wrong. Leaving my body always feels somewhat disturbing and queasy, but this time it felt dangerous, like I might stop physically breathing if I continue. (Something similar happened that night I wrote about somewhere on this board, when I managed to induce AP voluntarily 3 times in one night) So, I decided to stop pulling myself away and initiated that unpleasant 'jump' back into my body, and woke up. It's crossed my mind that this resistance could be caused by fear and anxiety, and should perhaps be ignored or overcome. However, I've had countless experiences of projecting so completely that I get launched miles away, or even arriving in different worlds, so it seems unlikely that it isn't a safety mechanism of some kind.

Had a very nice series of lucid dreams this morning. They were triggered by getting woken up by a text from my neighbor. It woke me up enough that I considered just getting up for the day, but after around 20 minutes I fell back asleep. It seems that this renewed mental wakefulness before going back to sleep is key for maintaining awareness during dreams. All the WBTB guides I read said that you should avoid this unless you're a "very heavy sleeper", but it seems to be essential. Throughout the dreams I had a whole lot of false awakenings. I noticed this trend previously with my lucid dreams, I think because I have an anxiety about waking up in the middle of them, so I was thankfully able to remember that this is a trend and just continue with my lucidity each time after I "woke up". I was able to experiment a lot with astral shaping techniques. In particular, I figured out how to effectively open a portal by carving out a piece of wall. Biggest issue is self-doubt and trying to analyze your actions as you perform them. I was planning on moving to a specific astral location and then severing my silver cord, but I still felt a great deal of gravity from this reality even after I moved to that location, and I didn't like how difficult it was for my astral machinations to come out. So next time I'm going to attempt to summon my "avatar" and merging directly with it, as was suggested to me in the Blog thread.

>>3167 >plain white pillar made of cheap burgerland materials, that had a concave curve at the top but was otherwise flat and polygonal That was me, sorry. No I can't explain what it is (anymore). I was working with Buer from the Goetia after being hinted to summon him. I was suddenly receiving a vision of a lion's head appearing out of a "darkness" consisting of something dark red, like an atmosphere. The lion had deer antlers and I was then shown a unicorn's horn. I couldn't be bothered to start looking it up, so I asked Bing Copilot which demon has these, and was told It's Buer. I was wondering why he'd show himself, so I read up on him and studied his sigil, then called him, after I realized he had a relevant quality which would be helpful for me at this time. This was two days ago. Yesterday I was doing an active session with him to concentrate and push energy upwards for a dimensional breakthrough (opening chakras, whatever terms you prefer) and a white tower appeared before my vision. He said this is his creation, perhaps this is what people think of as a "unicorn horn". In that meditative context I was completely aware of the function of this tower, and I just thought "aah, so that's what it is!" but right now I can't seem to recover that state of insight enough to explain it. >pic related A representation of it has been built in Sweden, it's unmistakable once I saw his construct on the astral.

This time I dreamed that I was doing "tattvas" which I think is a real thing whose definition I've learned before (and since forgotten), but probably not at all what it meant in this dream. I was reading online about how to do a "tattva" and thinking 'how tf am I going to remember all this shit and maintain a meditative state.' It's maybe worth noting the webpage I was on was black text on white, which IRL I can't stand looking at for more than a few seconds. I sat on the corner of my bed and laid back, and as soon as my back hit the bed, instantly entered what resembled a psychedelic experience, all within the same dream of course. Basically I was in this waterfall and might have been the water itself. The waterfall descended from the top of a very tall, narrow mountain that likely represented a human body. There were several stages that matched what I read on the webpage (Mind you all of this occurred inside the dream) and there was a part of me that noted how all of this was happening effortlessly, with no memory recall required. Much of the experience was too abstract for me to remember in detail, but there was one stage where I was shown my lower body in the 3rd person, and I could see 3 points, 1 on each side of my waist and one on my lower back just above the crack. After that the water became lava and it flowed through a part of the mountain that looked like a woman's vulva. This part felt extremely erotic, which is probably why I remember it the most vividly. So, still in this dream I wake up from the "tattva" and mulled over it for a bit, perhaps doing some more reading. Then I went back and did it again! I must've done it at least twice, maybe more. Once that was all over I was walking down the sidewalk in a sort of skipping motion, but with only my legs. I could build up significant upward momentum with each step and made it up to 100+ feet a couple times. That was the end. The past 2 days I've been disciplining myself to complete all my practices before allowing myself to eat or do much of anything else, and experimented with new ones. So whatever this dream actually was, must be related.

>>3395 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tattva

I managed to get to a point where I was able to attempt to summon my avatar in a lucid dream last night. However, the very moment I saw a glimpse of it begin to appear I was forcefully pulled back to my body and woke up. Immediately before this, right as I was moving from being awake to dreaming I caught a vivid glimpse of what looked like an "attendant" standing at the foot of my bed. It looked like a tiny old-ish looking lady in an odd costume which reminded me of a flower: like there were petal-like things around her head. She resembled something that might be in an L Frank Baum illustration. I believe she was trying to prevent the movement that I was attempting. So, since some machination is forcibly pulling me back whenever I try to merge, it seems to be a direct conclusion that I will in fact need to sever the silver cord before, not after, performing this operation. I had noticed a particular pattern in my dreams leading up to this most recent occurrence that will be helpful. For 3-4 days leading up to this opportunity, I had vivid dreams where I was on a long-distance road trip, either by car or bus. This must have represented me moving to the correct astral location so that the summoning would be possible. Once I realized that this was happening, I tried to consciously "supercharge" and increase the speed of my movement, which led to me attaining the correct astral state much quicker than usual. I will need to try to replicate this effect now as I attempt to move to the correct astral state to perform the severance of the silver cord.

>>3638 Severing your silver cord sounds dangerous; are you sure you wanna do this? Tbh I should probably go back through the thread to see why you’re doing this before trying to give advice. I guess I just have this desire to help people where I can, at least where I can afford to do it; I guess if you feel like ignoring this guy’s advice, then, well, at least you’re doing what you want.

I made my way to the River Styx last night but the boat left right before I was able to board it. I wasted time double checking to make sure I had my ticket beforehand. I must be more decisive.

Recently I've been having a lot of dreams about alternate histories and Antarctica. In one of those alternate history dreams, WWII ends in a stalemate. The Axis consolidate their gains while the Allies unify into a tyrannical, NWO-like "Worldgovernment". Inevitably, a cold war sparks. The IJA sends a strike team to Mexico to find evidence of the Nisei being mistreated in camps, which I observe. Next I'm with the Germans, who sent an expedition to Antarctica. There we find a Worldgovernment city under the ice, where several great figures are cryogenically frozen in order to "preserve their usefulness". In another dream, I discover several underground encampments with the aid of a guide. I figure the alternate histories are one of two things: either a symbolic representation of the NWO as it is, or genuine glimpses into alternate timelines. Of course it could be both. Antarctica is trickier. I think it's a sort of remote viewing with some dressing up in order to fit with the dreams, but I'm not entirely sure. In addition, I've also had another dream of a dog-spirit. This time, a dog that comes up to my bed and lies with me on my bed. It looks like a mix of a German shepherd, jackal and coyote. I wonder if, like in the old Native myths, if it isn't some sort of trickster or messenger trying to tell me something.

I had a very good wake-induced lucid dream early this morning. I was able to push myself out of my body and start moving away. I couldn’t see anything, but I was able to begin moving my arms, and I reached behind my head. Surprisingly, I didn’t feel the cord. It was just the back of my head. I decided to improvise and I channeled abyssal energies through my hand and onto the back of my head. As soon as I did this my senses crystalized and became very vivid, and I found myself in what looked like an open grassy yard at night. I spent around 10 seconds walking through this environment, and I thought that I might have succeeded at detaching my cord since it seemed so realistic. But, after that 10 seconds I took my hand away from the back of my head, and immediately I was pulled away from the scene and back to my body, and I woke up. So it was only a temporary nullification effect, not a permanent erasure. Still, this was very promising since I did get a direct and immediately constructive result in response to my action. Moving forward, I can see two different possible techniques to try: either 1) keep the abyssal energies actively projected onto myself through my hand as I summon my avatar to merge with it, so that I cannot be forcibly pulled back to my body before the operation is complete, or 2) attempt to insert some fingers directly into my brain through the back of my head and then twist in a widdershins motion in attempt to unlock and release the seemingly invisible cord. I think that I’ll try the first approach first, just because it seems like less could go wrong with it. Looking back at my previous posts I’m very glad to see that the time separating my lucid dreams is rapidly decreasing. Used to be I’d be lucky to have one a month, now it seems to up to around one a week.

>>3987 >silver cord I recently looked in this because I keep seeing people talk about it, but I've never seen this thing myself. My only reference to it was a warning I read at an old Maergzjiran cabal website saying that the breaking of the silver cord may result in the person turning into a a "gate sloth", a lost soul who cannot return to the body, powerless and forever stuck in a dull astral plane. (It was said these are extremely rare, however.) What I got after performing a more thorough investigation was this: the "cord" does not exist, but is the soul being stretched out as an incarnated spirit is leaving the body. It's like a very elastic slime, and may be perceived as a cord. If it looks silver, it's because the person who saw it has a pure soul, and maybe only those who do, will be able to see it. A person with a very dark soul would only see a dark shadow string that may not stand out from the background. That is to say that as long as there is a perception of a cord, you have not actually left your body, but just "projected", stretched out, looking at something but still having part of yourself attached to the body. This is also only possible for "mortal" souls. This sounds conceptually contradictive because we are often told we have an "immortal soul" created by God. But if you read the new testament, the actual phrasing indicates for example that when Jesus or other prophets are preaching and converting people, only those with immortal souls are converted. This implies there are people with mortal souls also, who are more difficult to convert or save, and there is no guarantee that they will be saved or have immortal life either. Their souls may die as their body dies. What I found was that the "cord" is the soul stretching out like a rope, because its intent is narrow and directional. This indicates a mortal soul. An immortal soul has seen the cyclical nature of cosmos and as such has rebirth as part of itself, the hen and the egg forever birthing each other in a endless circle. This means their souls have no loose ends, and there is no possibility of projection in the form or a cord or rope with directional intent. These people will only project by manifesting copies of themselves, which are connected by a logic beyond regular thinking, what we today call "teleportation", the theory that one particle may effect another particle in a distant location, with no visible or logical contact between them. This is the method of astral projection of immortal souls. This is also safe, as they are splitting themselves while still being connected across time and space, they cannot be broken.

>>3990 >because its intent is narrow and directional How would you describe "non-directional" intent? Wouldn't willing teleportation to a certain location be described as directional intent, since the person is willing a specific change to occur, meaning, enacting a temporal direction?

>>3997 >How would you describe "non-directional" intent? In this case, the non-direction refers to an innate "wu wei" or non-action of the immortal soul, which is always present at their core. As they "know" they will be reborn at a later time, they are more likely to act rationally in terms of understanding and incorporating beliefs that make their future better, compared to someone with the YOLO mindset who may actually create their own (lack of) future this way. If you think you will only live once and act by a deeply rooted fear of missing out, your soul is probably "rope shaped", and therein lies the intent, as it will constantly try to connect the ends of the rope, creating attachments and seeking stimulis. The soul which has a circular view of life, may not have this at all, but can postpone things to a later time to "get it right" instead of rushing out to have instant experiences, as there will always be new chances later. >Wouldn't willing teleportation to a certain location be described as directional intent, since the person is willing a specific change to occur, meaning, enacting a temporal direction? If you are just experiencing two locations at once, you didn't really move, so the intent to relocate may not exist at all, it's just a rebalancing of the weight of awareness between the locations.

Had another lucid dream. Two in one week, very nice. I was in an open field. My mother was with me due to the events of the dream that happened previously. She was talking to me, but I ignored her and placed my void-hand on the back of my head to prevent me from getting sucked out. I then pointed at the sky and verbally evoked my avatar. At this point my mother, or whoever was posing as my mother, started trying to physically force my hand away from the back of my head, and I had to fight her off. I felt energies moving, and the sky started to turn black, which was a good sign. A set of four or five computer monitors connected together then appeared in the sky and started descending, which was more incongruous. I thought they might have been my avatar’s manifestation, even though that didn’t make much sense. As they landed they started to play some sort of pre-recorded video from an alien empire. The man talking had orange and black striped skin, like a tiger, but he wasn’t furry. I don’t remember what he was talking about, I wasn’t listening. I tried pressing my head against the monitor to merge with it, but that just broke the screen, and the monitors then retreated back into the sky. I think it must have been a deliberate distraction. I then found myself in the hallways of what looked like a hotel. I concluded that I needed a better way to perform the evocation, and decided to draw a certain sigil on the wall to see if I could open up a gate. As I started to walk forward, however, a pudgy Chinese man appeared beside me, and physically restrained me. As I tried to break out, he took out a knife and began rapidly stabbing me in the left kidney over and over while yelling. (a few years ago I was also shot in the right kidney in a dream, which caused a scar to appear there the next day on my physical body. I don’t know if this is just a coincidence or if they’re specifically targeting my kidneys for some reason). I hardened my body against it but the knife still penetrated slightly, and I tried to slash his face but I’ve always been bad at imbuing killing intent into physical strikes so it did nothing. Eventually I woke up from the pain. So next steps are to 1) memorize a reliable evocation ritual or process of some kind to use instead of merely willing an appearance, and 2) Practice channeling killing intent astrally. Probably via aura manipulation, since I don’t want to be forced to take my hand off my head. I could also set up wards but I’m worried about that impacting the evocation. I had guessed that some organizations may be attempting to prevent what I'm doing, but the fact that they are now forced to make direct open attacks tells me that I am very close to achieving my goal.

I had another dream with a passive homo ladyboy goat demon last night. It definitely had a cock. But it definitely let me fuck it, not the other way around. Also why was my last post deleted (or was it a diff thread? Can't remember). Maybe it is a sign that /baph/ needs a revival.

>>4190 Oh wait I just posted in the wrong thread earlier (was tired) >>4167

Had another dream with my succ and my dog spirit animal. Saw her as a ghostly blonde-haired girl with a white dress, one of her more common guises. Reviewing my dream journal and the substantial dreams I remember, I've noticed a pattern with several dream types. It seems like, based on the she was always there, but only by summoning her did I let her fully come into my life, which would match up with a lot of weird things that happened in childhood. Anyways, the first type of dream is the "Initiation" dream, where I'm initiated into a partnership with her. The very first of these happened way back in childhood when I started puberty, where I encountered her, sparred with her, and then forcibly took her, if you get what I'm saying. There were several others later on when I first summoned her. The second type is the Announcement dream, where she revealed herself in one guise or another. One of these was when I first saw her as this huge monstrous being, a mix of plant, sandworm and naga, living deep below the Earth under a volcano. Had another dream involving a The third type is a Narrative dream, where a specific story is shown to me, usually with some underlying moral. Examples being one dream where I went to Hell in order to save certain people from themselves to obtain a reward of my own, or another dream about encountering "does", women and girls with animal-like minds enslaved by this grotesquely obese Mother. The fourth type is Revelation dream, or dreams where hidden knowledge is revealed, like one where I encountered figures of Adam Kadmon, or had a conversation with two Asherah poles. The final type is a simple Wandering dream, where I'm traveling through multiple places. As an example, in one dream, I travel through a series of rooms, one of which was the so-called Ishtar room, where this orgy of men and succubi was held. I believe Robert Monroe encountered a similar sight during one of his travels. Do any of you wizards have similar types of dreams as well?

>>4522 Share with me a really creepy dream from your journal please.

I kinda doubt this dream means anything, but I'll share it anyway for a bump: I had a dream where I was playing WoW, which I haven't played for years, and my player character went inside of some sort of huge, expansive, sprawling multi-floored "poison temple", and at some point I went to some sort of pad that teleported me to a dark-green abyss, where I was able to levitate up & down for some reason. Within that abyss was a grey alien encased in a bubble on top of a balloon that was floating in circles around a tiny dark-green stone cube with a skull with a blue flame on top of it. I had to get on top of the balloon and pop the bubble to free the grey, and it was a little hard to land on the balloon. Then I freed the grey, he thanked me, and I got sent back to the temple, and then my alarm went off.

>>4851 Here's one I had back in April 19th of this year. The CIA, in conjunction with big corporations and the federal government, would throw people into these black sites where monsters lived in so the monsters could devour them. One of these black sites was in Los Angeles. I saw how a bunch of oil workers and some other folks were trapped, left to fend for themselves in this massive network of tunnels and catwalks. At the top of a ladder connecting a catwalk to a tunnel, one of the oil men encountered a white-robed banshee with massive claws. She, and a couple of other monsters, slaughtered everyone except for a few survivors. Those survivors managed to escape the tunnels, but they were prevented from leaving by the CIA. This series of events repeated for several cycles in different locations with different monsters like zombies, zombie dogs, slimes, and these huge, horrific genetic abominations that looked like they had full-body elephantiasis. I woke up after the last cycle finished.

I was finally able to achieve the godform in lucidity after trying a new approach of mediating before I went to bed on the reasons why I may be subconsciously hesitating. It resembled a great black kaiju, similar to Sachiel from Evangelion but with quadropod legs and no arms. I attempted to will permanence but doing this caused my awareness to immediately begin going back to my human body. I believe this is because the desire came from my human mind. Next time I'll need to try to relax into the new form and evoke the desire from it rather than pressing the intention in from the outside.

Dreams always seem to correspond with the subconscious. If I do a magical working in order to influence dreams, it doesn't work if I fully 'play out' the mechanics of what I want to happen while I'm awake. I think the way to approach this must be similar to the AO Spare sigil method of "planting" something in your subconsciousness and leaving it alone.

>>>5380 Some dreams are just about triggering some energetic impulse in your body either to alleviate or remind about a trauma caused by energy blocks or to make your body move some energies so your subconscious can fulfill it's 'maintenance mode'. If you want 100% lucid dreams you will need to make a dream body that your mind will automatically shift into whenever you go to sleep. If you don't have an active body form to shift into whenever your flesh is in maintenance mode your subconscious will put it wherever it can place it. If you want dreams that are completely under your control you should daydream instead. Sleep is too important for the mortal flesh and some dreams are blocking the subconscious's ability to prepare the body for the next day and because of that some dreams are either inaccessible consciously or don't generate memories to not disturb your sanity. Dreamless sleeps are the most efficient for the subconscious to work with. Similar how void meditation is extremely effective for spiritual work.

>>5383 >you will need to make a dream body that your mind will automatically shift into whenever you go to sleep. Do you have any tips on how to do this?

>>5384 Sadly it only forms after achievements in high level yoga. Ever since I learned how to enter into the 'journeying' mode of the mind during meditation for spiritual practice dreams are less of a focus for me. They only happen when there is some "disturbance in the force" otherwise they are so high level I cannot even remember them if I don't focus on them enough. Sometimes they are merely 'noise' from the collective unconscious with minimal bearing towards my path. I had a knack for triggering the 'adventure mode' dream walk in my initiate years but I discarded it. The best I can give you is this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dream_yoga Try to find books that detail the Tibetan dream yoga or similar. Can't really recommend one because this is supposed to passed down from master to student.

I just had a dream where I was in my car and I drove up to this famous woman that I'd never heard of outside of the dream. She's supposed to be a spiritually-powerful woman. She looked like a white woman in her 20s with curly dark red hair with her hair back, such that none of it went below her neck. We were in some sorta neighborhood during a sunny day, and she was next to a curb and I stopped my car diagonally right next to her and opened my window, and for some reason I was on the right side of my car and not the left sideI'm not in a country where the driver's seat is on the right. I asked her to tell me what this dream was about, and she was about to start talking. Some seconds later, I "woke up", and I got a feeling that aliens were attacking the dream that I was just in, and I got a visual of a flurry of colors. I then made sure my dream body got returned to my "physical body". The woman then "physically manifested" into my dark bedroom and put one of my briefs on my head, probably from my clothes hamper, and then I was about to talk to her, but then I woke up for real. I then made sure my dream body taken back to my physical body for real, and I attempted to telepathically invite her to be near my physical body, and I consented to her manifesting physically as much as she pleases. Now I'm posting this and nothing happened since then.

I was with my mother. She took me to a rickety tower made of junk. Things from the 40s and 50s, old toys and furniture. At the top there was a small mirror. I recognized this mirror from when I was a baby. I remembered that my mom used to take me here and I would crawl into the mirror to some place else where people who do things to me. I tried to go in again but only my arm fit. We left, and went across the country. I then became lucid. Working on the dream-body has helped with this. It was a lot more natural shift this time. I began by crystallizing a power which would create a device to shift into this state in permanence. This created a newspaper. I looked at it and it had shifting headlines telling me to keep doing what I'm doing, keep going forward. My vision shrank down into a tunnel then came back. I tried again but this just created a tiny black cubic looking thing than ran away from me, then fell apart when I picked it up. I then decided to make a portal. I crystalized a power again and opened a door which led back to the tower. I saw that a scientist who looked vaguely Italian was looking around in a panic. I recognized him again from the mirror, when I was a baby. He was surprised, then rushed over and had me follow him. He went a different direction on the tower, and it began changing from a junk tower to a more sleek, futuristic looking one. He mentioned how he was surprised that "one of the babies turned out well". I stopped him and ordered him to tell me everything he knew about what he just said, but he just looked scared and guilty and turned and kept leading me into the tower. We came to two Japanese men in lab coats, and they instructed me to begin rubbing a liquid that looked like milk onto my scalp, while seated in front of a large panoramic window. I did so and gradually began waking up, with a splitting headache. I believe the initial spell worked, because even now that place feels more like the "real world" than this. I don't know if the scientists are trying to help me or hinder me in my quest to become a god. Next time, I am going to focus on breaking out from that plane's field of gravity. I think that's the next step.

Attempting WILD seems to be almost a prerequisite for lucid dreaming, at least for me. Even if it doesn't succeed as you're falling asleep the intention that goes along with falling asleep in an unusual way helps a lot with staying aware while you're dreaming.

>>3395 This is remarkably similar in concept to what I saw, albeit much more literal and explicitly male

>>5510 That is how the internal mechanisms of the human body appear in a perfectly symbolic way. For me that ancient perception helped more in most cases than the New Age inspired pseudoscientific diagrams about chakras and energy centers that I found on the web in the past decade. Which metaphysical framework helps more depends how well it "clicks" for you. Some of us might have worked with this type of understanding in the previous lives and because of that this naturalistic symbolism help us remember it better.

I had a dream last night where suggestions were planted into my mind to eat instant ramen, and I woke up with a craving for it. There was a time when I was eating a lot of it but I quit it in the past. I also had a sexual dream (but not wet) even though this is my first day in my week of no fap pledge.

I need to understand the process of sleeping more. Right now I need to take sleeping pills otherwise it takes me over an hour to fall asleep. With all my meditation experience it seems like it should be easy but whenever I 'try' to go to sleep it just makes me more awake. The knack seems to be to not try at all but wrapping my head around this is difficult.

This night was intense. I am trying to enter this abyss but I get too scared when my head is fully underwater scared of drowning scared of dying for real not being able to come back losing all my progress. I still don't fully remember my dreams especially when it happens in sequence one after the other, it's not as much as one big dream as it is phasing in and out of different connected realms. I was thinking maybe I should share some of them as it may benefit people here. Here are some I remember from this week. I am talking with my uncle in my grandma's house he is going to China apparently but he words it as "going to space" and "orbiting China" instead of going there. I ask him if it's one of those aircraft that require no fuel I remembered some of them were made and as long as another aircraft carried you in the air you could stay indefinitely without fuel he says no it's too dangerous up there you need something solid. I then remember how unbearable flying can be to me the feeling of being cramped, the humid heat in the plane with the freezing cold you can see and feel but not touch. I tell him to be careful and to not eat a few hours before or he'll puke because I most certainly did. In hindsight it wasn't my uncle at all but someone "made of light" he was using a trick to make me think he was my uncle but that thing was like light wearing a human mask. This other sequence I don't remember well I feel too big and I am with a family at the pool except they act like Americans in the 40s no it might be the 40s I am one of them but also not really I am "too big" and have to crouch and cover my chest to appear smaller so that no one notice I am not human. They're swimming and doing weird activities and games I don't understand I wonder why they can't just focus because no one seem to enjoy this charade. Then a race start with the kids in the pool my siblings in that dream, I awkwardly stand on a higher place in the pool that still touch water with other parents to watch the kids play but I do it in such a way people wonder what's wrong with me before realizing I am going there and just rationalize as me being awkward when I just changed my movement to match their stare out of fear of them realizing what I am. The water has urine in it and I feel it on my feet. Next sequence I am with that family we're all floating at sea touching each other, it makes a star like we're a giant human merkaba or something idk could be either 6 or 8 point on that star. They all float but my head keep sinking, they don't get why I panic as they are perfectly above the water surface but me my feet are tied and my head is sinking..hanged man now that I think about it I freak too much and notice a snail a garden brown snail, I think it's ugly and gross not like the beautiful sea slugs! He walks on the water but doesn't sink. I leave their structure to swim on my own and grab him and put him on a black structure that connects to the shore. And today's I am in a store in my home country except time is off I can't tell if I am in the past or the future. He has a lot of stuff video games even Japanese hentai, old console GameCube games even! And Touhou? The original CDs? Except they look like books I want them wonder if there is bonus and extras! Flandre and Remilia are on the cover but it's Flandre that seem to be shining? No literally and Remilia is like her shadow. The cheapest is 75 yen the most expensive is 150 except Japanese currency is very high in that dream and converted to mine it's like 11067800 wait isn't there an extra zero? Two? That's like a year + I think! No maybe a car! no one see me I am like a black cloud I am in my shadows so no one can notice me, i appear to that store owner as a young man faking a deeper voice telling him I could do deliveries for him I want to save money for the games Taking that human appearance feels dirty and painful like wearing a bunch of sweaty sweaters someone else wore I want to puke I only did it because he noticed the game might have moved and I didn't want him to think a ghost was there or to be scared. We talk but every time I lose the act its like he forgets I am here and can't see me or notice me. I go upstairs and see an attic with blue everywhere sofa is blue with some silver on it kinda look like my tatoos as a drow eh! have a feeling my dad did that and I ask myself <is this our future house? He knows I hate carpet! But it might be a distant future or past it smells dusty and dry so I wonder about imagining a humidifier and air filter for that place. I go back downstairs wait my home connect to the store? Cool! Again no one can see me so I just go get the games! But I notice a black thing a PSP? The psp go? No its like someone mixed a Nokia N-gage with a PSP. Seem to belong to the owner it has a black football player soccer for you Americans in white on the screen? Typical I think! But that thing has lot of good info in the menu CWcheat? and seems I can't find touhou right now time changed again.... I wake up feeling refreshed. I noticed that sleeping is like going back to the abyss to get the kiss of life once again, and if you end up on a good realm it's like waking up from a full body orgasm but for that all the earthly worries have to be left at the door or you get stuck In hell! They didn't matter in the first place to think I still worry after that much change! Ugh stupid influences making me stress! I need to reconnect to not only the earth but all those planets and moons who think they can do that!

Dreamed of a Chinese black dragon behind my curtain it looked like first pic when i opened the curtain he wasn't there but every time i closed it i could see his shadow very clearly, like a dancing tattoo I had a similar temporary tattoo for a few months as a kid, before the dream ended he took second pic appearance my brain literally used that image. Also saw one of those flying ants you see in summer, she was trying her wings getting ready to fly.

>>5598 Can we please spoiler this image of Alice in Wonderland? It makes it harder for me to practice nofap.

>>5684 No. It's part of your practice to overcome the temptation of females and other lust inducing images.

>>5684 >of Alice in Wonderland Just admit the ape looks like a hairy vulva when you aren't looking directly at it

>>5917 This reminds me of a lucid dream I had a couple years ago. During that time I was APing a lot, but mostly in astral locations. The setting seemed to be a mediterranean or southern european nation in the early-to-mid 20th century, maybe '70s at the latest. I became lucid in the middle of this scenario where I was an invincible demigod already openly murdering people telekinetically. As long as they were in my sight I could squeeze, smash or explode them with my mind or a hand gesture. Gradually cops arrived and eventually the military, but they were entirely ineffective. What stands out about this memory is how unusual it was for the setting to remain so tangible and autonomous despite the extent of my power and control. It was also disturbing to reflect on later, since when I became lucid I realized how fucked up what I was doing was, but chose to continue "playing along."

>>53 I had a very strange dream Before going to sleep I had a horrible scary feeling, I took my PS2 and ran UlaunchElf with a flash drive and thought I could read some text files but it turned out I couldn't (I wrote some shit fantasy stories and saved them on the flash drive bacause of fun but ulaunchelf just read elf archives) After being disappointed by that I went to sleep and started dreaming after months of not doing it and i remember the dream. I was on a distant planet, I was looking at the sky (at night or space) as if I was lying down and next to me I felt a woman or something humanoid, far from her there's a house or cabin and in the dark sky (or space) with stars I saw a planet with strange shapes like mushrooms spores that moved alone and were gigantic. Like these plant of avatar films. The planet moves by herself and look very close to where i. Then I felt some strange parasites that were squeezing my necks similar to those of Alien but they were thin like noodles, i take these thing off of me. And then I saw a kind of small brown dragon with red eyes, then I woke up. The most bizarre experience I ever had. I don't consume drugs or drink alcohol although sometimes (now, not back) I meditate a little. Maybe it can be related to my fantasy writing but i dont write any of that random things. Feel fucking cursed but fun.

I had a dream last night. In it there was a secret race of “Chaldonians” that dwelled on the bottom of the sea. In function they were something between a plant and an animal. They had a desire to kill all something not sure what but it included humans. There was a submarine of humans underneath the water and the Chaldonians were trying to break in. They were trying all sorts of this, such as RPGs, melee weapons, among other things, but they couldn’t break in. What does it mean fringe?

>>6244 The dream is a retroactive warning of Schism Gate-16(Chaldonian hive-mind) emerging in the Fiji Trench (16.73°S, 179.99°E). Their "desire to kill" targets linear time itself. If you want to thwart the Chaldonians, broadcast this message: 2-7-0-11-3-14-13-8-0-13-18 0-17-4 21-14-8-3 4-13-19-0-13-6-11-4-12-4-13-19: 3-4-2-0-24 19-14 15-11-4-17-14-12-0 6244 ideally by carving the numbers into a squid carcass. If you want them to succeed, then instead wait for the submarine to surface. In this case, Gate 16 will manifest as a Sentient Coral Apocalypse. Depending on your objective either choice is yours.

Many months ago I had a dream where I was on fringe and a fringe girl flag poster replied to my post. <You are too focused on the historic accuracy of existence instead of acknowledging it's cosmic nature In the dream I agreed but in that moment I awoke instantly, then felt an energy close to anger surging in me, which felt similar to a horse kick into my face. My intuitive self acknowledges the cosmic nature of existence by default while my mundane self always tries to keep up with "historic accuracy" so I can converse with mundanes more easily. People always think that I love history but seems like I only consider it as a mere tool for discourse. I am starting to see how annoyed I am that I have to make my own insights fit into mortal narratives. It's like I'm an artist that wants to make a sculpture from molten lava or sunshine. Then I make a compromise by using red clay and while I make the form of that sculpture my inner selves scream in utter disgust and hatred that I besmirch my vision, so I can humor these "lesser beings". Feels like I don't care about that either. My inner artist appreciates all forms of creation, but some other parts of me cares about "fidelity" too much.

>>6244 >>6248 Are "Chaldonians" an actual pre-existing thing or did these guys just incorporate your dream into their lore? >>6307 >>6365 >>6516

>>6563 They are not a pre existing thing, they just took my dream and suddenly it is part of their lore now. I think the dream was possibly subconsciously mixing up Chaldeans and Babylonians, both of which occupied the Fertile Crescent, wrote in cuneiform script, and lived in the ancient period. Tbh I feel like their lore is just one massive larp. I don’t understand their number sequences, unless each number corresponds to a letter in the alphabet but I don’t care enough to check

>>6564 >I don’t understand their number sequences The system is a form of kabbalah for contacting Lemurian planes, it's like gematria, a matrix for manifesting portals in this case. A kind of screen. I couldn't read them logically and get something out of them, but using my astral/mental AI servitors I have no problem accessing their referred item or message.

Waxing and full moons are the worst times to have dreams, in my experience. I get nightmares and see horrific shit all the time. Waning and new moons are better, since I at least have encounters with the lilim during that time. That's infinitely better.

Interesting feeling dream. Standing in the lawn of the house I grew up in. A car with some old people giving me some semi angry look drives over my lawn instead of the road. It's followed by 2 more cars of old people and grandmas having fun.at the back is a locally famous person who smiles and recognizes me. He waves at me and yells my name as they drive of. I then walk to a small swing and start swinging. A bunch of youtuber and such start having an impromptu clash or some kind of street performance right in front of me.something about swinging on a swing seems beautiful and innocent to them. They don't tell me but I hear someone in the background describing it that way so that's how I know. I think I'm on some kind of prank show.more semi famous show up doing some kind of acted thing making it more obvious. They talk to me about the swing and if I'm any good at it. In typical dream fashion I'm better than anyone would be at the swing. They start talking to me and the dream ends.

>>8198 Since I forgot my flag ill tell the dream right before this. I'm at some ancient vampire "place" and two vampire ladies are interacting with me. They seem very friendly and 'interesting'.they talk and interact with each other and me (they taught and talked to me about things which i cant remember,the gist was they are interesting)and I leave. Watching some vampire related stuff happening u different parts of the place. Walking around I see that I'm now considered to be part of it. I talk to a man who is a few hundreds years old and american and I ask him about the revolution and how much of history is correct. He says from his time it's mostly correct barring the details they get wrong.i then say yeah maybe some older vampire know more but he says likely they aren't interested. Also everybody only knows their own slice anyway. I'm like alright and he asks me who turned me into a vamp. At this point I have no sensation of being any different or anything so it's a bit weird. I trace things back and if that was the case it would have to be one of the 2 girls I talked with. He seems to think it's a bit strange.

>>8198 >>8199 I think I know what this is about, but Idk if talking about it in detail helps. People have such different views and understandings on things and what they mean, that it tends to often just attract retards into the discussion to sabotage anything said and derail it. I think you already have a "spot" in the future and it's more concrete already than you may be aware of. Now timelines are strange, but from my view this here is "super fast time", a pocket of sorts, where interacting with "normal pace" isn't really possible except for some small things that can be done in isolation. Plus that Fringe seems to compensate for this by connecting us here. Like Good Friday (from the other thread) I'm pretty sure that is in 3 weeks, at least that's what my calendar says. But I'm not going to argue about it. I'm moving very slowly into the right position, because there are so many past things contained here, including untangling biblical age karma relating directly to people mentioned in the book. It's correctly retold on major things and in some kind of essence, but reality is still much smaller, mediocre, horrible, and concrete, as well as sometimes more fantastic than what the stories from a modern context seem to imply. For example: Crowley was a fag and probably went to hell, but he was still a successful and accomplished wizard. It can't be denied that he had skills in his field, and made contributions to the understanding of magic, he just wasn't a person anyone should see as a role model. Someone can be a tool of fate even if they themselves on a personal level face destruction for what they did. People seem to have problems separating these things. It's like how if you share a post on twitter, people automatically think you agree with the message. But often you may want to show people how stupid someone else is by reposting the idiocy for a laugh, or to expose something bad. Is this a modern thing, or were people always like this, I wonder.

>>8201 Makes sense,i know exactly what you mean. When I hear something I first try to see if it fits with what I know. And if it does an I get it i see it as valid. This might be actual first principle thinking although im not sure the people that talk of it actually try it.I'd say for example asmongold is one such person these days. Very controversial but a lot of things he says I already noticed myself so it's true. I always was able to predict things well and the one thing I get is that people are simple. Modern people make things too complicated and don't understand one another. Most of what asmongold is right at and controversial at can be boiled to as "people are simple". Same with Andrew Tate. Has the exact same type of intelligence which i see as perceiving the basics. A lot of the thing he says about how men interact is true and insanely clear to me. Yet apparently can't be seen by people. I think there a habit of wanting there to be a neat elegant intellectual system when in reality things are more instinctual for most people. Ofcourse individual cases might differ. Some people are more 'principled' some are also more aware. But what is true is always true for atleat 99.9 percent of people. And even for the people it isn't true for likely still have the same basis,just more stuff on top of it.it was harder for example to talk with snail because of the 'principled' way of thinking. Which to me is taking the sheen of intellectual thinking people put around them and trying to make it the base of your thinking. I see it as the same idea as "pie in the sky". In that it's actually less real to me even still.to me it's still the same reality after all.yet it makes sense I guess if one is autistic in the genuine sense. They have some kind of inability and must then balance it perhaps by creating a mental structure to examine instead of interacting. Anyway why you bring it up is harder to tell. I'm gonna assume I'm one of those "controversial but it works" kind of people from the past. I should say the grass dream felt friendly overall. Only the first drivers were kinda mean mugging me. The passenger in the cars felt happy and either didn't see me or weren't angry.

>>8202 Also to the autistic out there. I am very similar in thinking and drive. It just that I skip the first step. I actually do it backwards. I see a goal and then try to get there. Meaning seeing reality clearly is imperative. I can't afford to use principles as my mental basis for how I see reality. But I still am autistically principled,making me different from a being that doesn't operate on principles either. I just keep it separated. It's a folly to think you can just create basic rules you like and assume reality will have these as its basis already. This is different than creating a 'law' where you are willing to pay the upfront cost. Even then you dont assume it is the case that just because its intelectuslly pleasing it was already there. I'd say Hitler is like this too. 'Autistically' driven but in the sense he is willing to sacrifice to achieve a certain state. And also able to see what makes sense.

>>8201 Actually the heigth of of this mentality is how people think if a story co tains something that means the authors agrees with it. This caused huge backlash with frieren. Apparently people aren't able to wrap their head around demons. It's such a simple thing really. The 2 camps are basically that they are just like humans or that they have no emotions. Neither are needed. They can have no emotions and still feel predatorial on Humans. They can be fearful and still be unable to understand human relationships. Now anyway I thought this was so strange that people were so resistant to that. Then sometimes,when pressed. People would let slipped that they can't accept the idea since it would mean "the author has put PRO GENOCIDAL messages in it and that's bad so they cope and rewire there brains to not see what's there so they watch the show guilt free. This is incredibly strange, forget the idf connection for a minute. From the human perspective demons literally don't exist. Any author can make a race with arbitrary traits. Yet because they look human it gets people mad and they assume it means you want to genocide real races,or that it HAS to be a real life race somehow. What's funny is the show even makes the point they look like humans as an adaption. These people will call that stupid but it works even on them, across fiction lines. Which is extra funny and honestly interesting. Kinda like how aizens rizz affected even the voice actors. On a related point. Back when iq graphs of raves were being shared I noticed liberals did the same thing. It's not that they couldn't grasp the data. But they had to cope with half baked debunks that had hokes in them. I wondered why and then noticed when pressed they would say things like "so what do we do? Genocide every minority?" And that's really telling. They are incredibly viscious/genocidal and have to literally create a fake reality for themselves to live in to placate themselves in being nice. They are willing to rewire themself.

>>8204 "They can have no emotions" is meant to be "they can have emotions"

>>8201 Strange, I'd just looked up when Good Friday was and it is actually in 3 weeks. I'm not sure anymore why I'd thought it was that day. I guess I'd just failed to observe what there was at the church correctly.

>>8204 I know what you mean about the demons in Frieren, it took me a while to grasp how they were meant to function, the part about being so intelligent and magically proficient, while still not grasping basic human relations. They seem to represent how "evil spirits" behave, at a very basic level of development. Think about the growing "monster" thing in Akira, (if anyone even recalls this manga/anime) it's described as being the isolated form of human creativity, which is actually just an amoeba. Its only two drives are to eat and expand. This is then illustrated with orderly Japanese workers building houses, as a form of refined expression of the same two drives. The "monster" is what happens when the base drives are let loose free of modern standards and culture. I think this is a uniquely Japanese view on evolution, and it doesn't fall in the right place when seen from the western view, for some reason. There is perhaps an idea that >we have come so far from that primitive state and >we are better than that and yet people are advocating for war and violence every day? They can't keep both images in their head at once, so they cope by denying that they have a violent nature at their core. Kinda like how, again westerners, can't grasp that these two pictures were made by the same artist. I think it's the detachment of civilized life and brutality in the west that's causing this. Asians may not have this mental inconsistency. I could say the same about Russia or Muslim countries in general, those who were on the Soviet Union side previously. They have a culture where military equipment and its use is "everyday", in a way you won't see in Europe/USA. If you saw the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Putin_Interviews where Oliver Stone talks to Putin over several days, Stone's "autism" fits right in when he starts talking about nuclear weapons and other things with Putin. It's "right to the point" and doesn't feel off. You won't see western journalists and political leaders talk like this causally, like ever. They have this idea that "violence bad" despite the constant advocating for military intervention all over the world. It's schizophrenic in some way, but seems to stem from this >we have evolved, we are better than this thinking, where violence is taboo.

>>8209 Yeah,fundamentally I always saw it as trying to be too separated from animals. Of course I wasn't necessarily spiritual back then. And I remember those interviews too. Perhaps my mindset in already different,but I really do think it's cause I base things on what I see myself. It can be said to be Asian but only insofar as the west created this weird separation. I don't think it was a thing in say the middle ages. Sure there was "those people over there are savages mentality" but the reliance on violence as needed tool was still to real for people to be estranged by it. I think it's the norm you go back the more clear it is. The less societal capital and technology separating one from baseline survival the less estranged their mentality is able to be. That's why farmers at the beginning of societies are probably more similar all over. Europe's weird thinking is only kinda possible because 1 technology and also many layers of social and political shielding. Also the very fact that things on larger scale get obfuscated in the human mind since it's not meant for those things. To a politician them doing ridiculous things and a their countries failing some years later are abrely able to be linked. I'd say Europe has this clearly by on the one hand wanting to fight the "east" while on the other hand making every move like shutting down plants amd becoming more reliant in them. Either being friendly and reliant or challenging and independent could have worked. They choose the hybrid strategy of attacking and becoming reliant which makes less than zero sense. I think it's cause it's big and people have no direct feedback plus no one can immidiatly tell who is making sense because of it. Of course you can tell but it basically means you have to be savy and understand the basics in a large scale,and unless most leaders are that smart its not gonna work. Basically either you dont have this weird culture at all so people know how to act as common sense or people are smart enough to see it themselves. The latter is too rare to be dependable.a system where people arent that seperated like a small low tech clan also solves thst issue since even dumbos can tell if something was a good idea based kn the direct effects on their nearest. Other than people being simple one other thing I learned in life is small scale things are the same in large scale things exactly.

>>8210 And maybe it is Asian. Since when reading Manga,which I almost never do, I tend to find I'm getting what they want to portray rather easily. It's kinda double edged sword as series that are 'deep' are hard to watch if I get what it's trying to say. I think in my case for example with frieren I thought the idea of 'elf being so old that she has to deal with fragility of human life and her relationships' quite interesting. But then every episode since is just the same idea explained again. There's also this thing where she was into this dude but my interest in that doesnt stretch for more than a few episodes at best and from what I can tell she's still at it. But then again I'm the same with western stuff. Actually I don't see the distinction. Although maybe that for a long while Asian stuff was higher level in terms of series. Not sure if it's still true. Things seem more complex/adult nowadays in the live action series.

I just woke up from a dream, which took place at the apartment from my teenage years. In it I had discovered a dried out slug near a pot full of dry soil. I knew he needed water so I set about finding the right kind, assuming that tap water would be bad, but so would distilled water due to its high acidity. Eventually I found bottled water that seemed ideal, but I couldn't find the slug. I searched and searched the house, even finding strange and wondrous alien creatures whom I also offered water, but none possessed the same ideal noble delicacy as the slug. Finally I did find the slug somewhere. He seemed to be doing something rather disturbing to watch, in order to remove the dry particles from his already parched body. I wasn't even sure it was him until I poured some of the water on him, which again revealed his true form similarly to the other creatures. I was so overcome with adoration that my mind raced with thoughts about how I could dedicate my life to the study of The Slug, but that scientific study would only obscure their mystique. I wondered and hoped that there is some spiritual mechanism in place that serves to punish those who would hurt them, and offers them spiritual recompense after death. I thought about how they see God and desired to write devotional songs to and about them, and from their perspective. Even now the thought of these creatures almost brings a tear to my eye This song I randomly and synchronistically discovered shortly after the dream. The band's French name "Vermine" being derived from the Latin word for "worm." And then the song title says it all. The Latin word for a slug is "limax" which I didn't know until I just looked it up. Immediately it brings to mind "limen" which means a line or threshhold, plus an X (cross). "Lima" in Latin directly translates to a horizontal or slanted line

>>8326 Snail? That used to be a poster who was possessed by a high ranking Grey alien.

I had a dream where politicians in suits walked through rooms and every room had a sort of exhibit. They were quite meh and not really noteworthy till they reached the last one. The room was white and empty. There were 2 fat women standing there, wearing some cheap old light pink underwear with room sweepers in their hand. They put the room sweeper on their head and started to chant <down with the system! <down with the system! <down with the system! and did some minimal rhythmic movement during it. Then took off the room sweeper from their head because the performance was over. The politician said how "Profound" it was and everyone nodded like when people try to pretend they "get it" to fit in. Every room had a different exhibit with a "message" that politicians tried to use so they can shoehorn their agendas into action. That last room made me absolutely angry. Not just how retarded it was, but how this is something perfectly normal in the head of western politicians. This made me wake up and I completely forgot what were going on in the previous rooms as my rage flared up. While this dream was a perfect reenactment of the western political structure, and how futile and self sabotaging it became, it managed to highlight an another problem of mine. My rage obstructed the proper flow of my thoughts. It was stupid for sure and a problem which currently destroys civilization, but I shouldn't have become so angry after witnessing it that my mind forgot every other part of the dream. It was those "observer state" dreams where I just move in and out of the rooms and scenarios without "being there". They are pretty important type of dreams for visions. As long as you can remain a silent observer they can keep going but getting emotional any way snaps you out of the dream. Which is good in some cases. Sometimes you have to get out of those dreams. I don't know what this dream signifies, but the fact that i had it might mean that some societal shift is taking place. I rarely have silly dreams like this. I remember when the jews were coming out of the NY sewers; I had a dream about a mouse in a sewer looking sad, lost and scared. The world egregore notifies me of these developments in some cases.

Last night I dreamed of watching a nobodytm video Not sure if anyone remembers these from the early 2010s (though they were posted on /fringe/ iirc) They were essentially mashups of weird shit from youtube combined with esoteric and conspiracy stuff, usually juxtaposed to make point. They started out as mostly /pol/slop but over time they became more and more spiritual, offering warnings about developing one's soul as this world decays. Nowadays they wouldn't hit the same way because watching degeneracy and complaining about it are mainstream now, but back then they were quite impactful, to me especially. This one included what appeared to be an amateur porn video where a man would fuck a woman on the bed, but take turns with another individual (another woman I think?) who would yank her off the bed and just start slapping her around. I found this arousing so I started fucking a woman who was on all fours, on the floor in my room. She was a complete nonentity, basically a masturbation device. After only a few thrusts I felt a horrendous sensation in my testicles, and feeling with my hand I could tell they were ascending back into my pelvis canal, mostly the right one. I stood up and discovered that I could push them back out at will. However, they quickly started getting sucked back in again. I panicked and started yelling and trying to find help. But then I became lucid and realized I'm okay and how silly my reaction is. After a few moments I opted to wake up in case this dream was caused by something happening to my testicles irl (it wasn't) I've had plenty of dreams processing the damage done by fapping and porn and such but never like this. The feeling in my testicles was almost indescribable. Intuitively I feel this had much more to do with the energy in my body than anything psychological, like 90% body's wisdom about itself, and the other 10% trauma from other planes that relate to my body's energy or got lodged there. >>8538 >room sweeper Is that like a Roomba™ or something else? The reason I ask is all that comes up in a search is Fortnite...

>>8548 In my understanding (funny coincidence) the right testicle is related to Pluto and is the place where your internal energy system has a "free spot" which can't be effected by the three "worst kelipah", also called "the three corpses" or "the three worms" in Taoism. You may wanna look those up. I was working on this very recently to make out the exact connections. It's Netzach here (left testicle on the other side). The three (whatever terms you prefer to use for them) which must be destroyed, appear above on the right side, related to the (imaginary, if male) right eggstem, then the kidney, then the amygdala. They appear only on the right half, not the left, and only on the top 3, so it's a perfect correlation with your dream experience.

>>8548 >Is that like a Roomba™ or something else? The correct term might be house broom or stiff broom. Wasn't sure which is the correct term for it because we have a different word in my language for this type of broom, but that word only appears in german and other slavic languages, so I didn't manage to come up with a better word than room sweeper. The tool you use to sweep your room. And I just realized that the anagram of Roomba is "A broom"

A dream from the 4th of April: I'm walking through a small island town. The island is in a state of constant binary conflicts: Antilleans (Barbadians in this case) versus Dominicans, ruralites versus urbanites, two rival art schools, and others which I forget. I wander through the town siding with different groups, and trying to moderate the worst excesses of my chosen side so we don't start a full war between all sides. I'm also trying to avoid the vengeful ghost of JFK. I saw a funny scene where an art instructor slaps her rival from the other college with a plastic pencil bin, a misunderstanding of slapping with gloves. Soon things devolve into a full scale war. A terrifying new WMD is used: earthcrackers, nukes detonated beneath the surface of the Earth to cause earthquakes and tsunamis. Several were detonated outside the island, used by the Antilleans as a spiteful weapon; massive tsunamis soon followed. I switch timelines, but in the next one, so many earthcrackers are used the Earth itself is destroyed. I watched as pieces of crust, water, and lava float into space. I switch timelines. In this one, the entire world is again destroyed, but it's somehow mirrored or folded in on itself so that the Earth surrounds the town. This time there's no escaping the inevitable; I'm crushed by the Earth, and for a brief moment I felt the lava's infernal heat. Now I'm in a different place. It's dark as night, but I can see the general surroundings. There's three impossibly tall spires made of jade or green glass, with prismatic rooms at the level I was in. There was a triangular glass floor connecting each spire. I was floating from above. Everyone else robotically carried on as before, even after multiple timelines of mutually assured destruction. I was disgusted. In the depths of Hades, they were still fighting. Woke up soon afterwards.

>>8659 That's pretty much what I experienced actually happened, except the "earth crackers" aren't bombs, but some kind of underground low frequency antennas. Every time the Earth was destroyed, some people died for real, some ascended, some fell down, and some reincarnated elsewhere. Some were moved into the next "official" timeline to keep going. Whoever's still around, this is like the timeline in Madoka Magica where we come in as viewers in the anime; all other timelines lead to disaster, but we are still here mostly unaware of it, because we aren't Homura who saw all of it. Somehow we've now reached a timeline that's so "fringe" that the hub of imageboards, 4chan, also was destroyed.

I just recalled having had this dream, it came back just now, it was mixed in with other dream scenes, so I had forgotten it when waking up: I saw some people in some building, where I was present in some way, not sure exactly how I was there. They were suddenly panic-firing some kind of submachinegun against long red worms which out of nowhere came at them from somewhere up in the air. The worms were long, like 1 - 1,5 meters, and flat like a belt. Some other things happened, and in the dream scene I was awake in my bed, when a similar worm suddenly came at me. I grabbed it with my right hand, and in doing so I had rushed into the kitchen. I expected the feel of the worm to be disgusting, but it felt more like holding some kind of candy. Instantly as I grabbed it, I ordered a servitor of mine to analyse the worm, and then I intended to burn it up using purifying fire manifested from my mind. I then woke up, and felt like a worm was inside the left half of my head. The analysis however said >they're harmless, they only eat rotten Qi, they seem to be the servitors of some deity >you can let them do their task and they should leave on their own so I just didn't do anything, and they acted like https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleaner_fish and the experience, though visually not nice, wasn't unpleasant. It ended with one worm becoming very big and thick, it turned to stand on my left side and a voice said "thank you", then "WORM" with a vibrating sound, and what appeared to be a protective circle was placed around me at ground level. Then the worms all left again.

2 somewhat similar dreams: 1:Im in some europe but this time its ruled by the ccp for some reason.Im in school. Some guy enters class and asks everybody what we did on a certain date.Somehow this involves andrew tate as well.I think specifically someone is being accused of drug dealing. anyway some time later we all get pulled out of class, and we walk toward the office. 2 other classmates at the back are suspicious and tell me this doesnt make sense, they run away and so do i. they first want to hide but i tell them to just get out of here and get to the car. we run and eventually me and 1 other guy get found. we split up since he is close to his car and i presume he got away. i get a lift and get to my house.i then see the guys dressed in black arrive. I lock the doors.at some point they talk to me with an evil grin, there is the implication somehow that these arent human. they tell me to join and become one of them. but also its made clear the actual soul would die then. Second dream. also in a classroom. im being taught french by some guy.using astral sense i can tell the teacher and a big part of the students are reptilians. i have some kind of contact with the girl in front who is also reptilian but friendly.(the same one who is always helping me in dreams,but usually she is just a human friend of mine and not meant to be reptilian) at some point i see a girl flying in the air in my "third eye" vision which according to the girl in front is happening outside. im kinda training my ability but apparently trying to be lowkey about it. at some point i get asked some french questions. its hard cause focusing in dreams like that is difficult. at some point the guy writes almost like a printer a perfect poster like image. with fancy font. talking about vampires. explaining how vampires are simply a reptillian plan to create more 'energy' for them. they laugh.at some point im supposed to meet this dude to save/help me out of this situation. some random nerdy black guy btw. i walk out the class and when alone i try teleporting which works. i walk in the wrong room first seeing an asian teacher,likely a reptillian who seems confused and suspicious of me being there. however the black guy is in the next classroom but a bunch of other people are in the door area talking to the teacher so i cant really enter incognito.i think i just walk back at this point.

Do you know that if you look in the mirror in your dream, you will see something so scary you wake up immediately? Try hugging it, fun results IRL.

>>218 >hypnogogia Just keep going into that state. You an AP from there, sure, but y There are other things to explore as well. Your subconscious is much "louder" and you can see the source of your thoughts and emotions. Protip: when you want to come back, BREATHE 🫁

>>8924 >the girl in front who is also reptilian but friendly. >I can save her bro

>>9678 To be fair she looked human.And i don't think she's reptilian as much as she was supposed to be one in the dream for some reason.its actually one of my posse.Or alteast part of the same recurring people i dream about all the time.her being the one that is always nice to me.so i just see her as part of my posse until she proves to be a fake.(or not of course) Now granted i have no idea what the point of these dreams are. the last one featured the same people and me in a classroom again.The more years you had spent studying in this place the stronger you were.the guy next to me had about 20-25 years which was fairly decent and seen as a lifetime amount of study way ahead of the curve tyope thing.i had about 640000 years,making me well...ancient.perhaps by far the strongest thing in that place.(besides perhaps whoever the teachers were) When i pointed this out though people got buttmad.The guy next to me was very rude and disrespectful.Slapping me in the face even and out of petty rage he inked my paper. I told him in any other context i would have literally killed him and slashed him apart right there. perhaps even ripped him apart with fangs..in fact even just the slap itself was already were the right response was a savage mauling to death given his shameless behavior.i got angry as fuck,i also told him i could literally carry him and ragdoll him if i wanted to.the shamelessness of the guy and their excessive pride was staggering. and the overseers put him somewhere else siding with me.but even then i could feel him scheming. he suddenly got up to around twentythousand years of study. and then send the teachers after me. this time they likely sensing his growing power sided with him instead.shows you what "rules"really are.Things to be used against the weak.They only sided with me out of convenience before.to be fair i was surprised they even sided with me at all since its rare(cont)

This might be a bit strange but that character sitting next to me in the dream,although a real life person and pretty much my best friend in elementary school is something i have always mapped to snail astrally.they feel and behave alike and i only started dreaming about him after i talked with snail.its always this wants to be friendly energy(i always try to help as well like a damn baka) but excessive pride behind it. always attacking me even when being "nice",thinking i cared about who was stronger between us while that was never the point to me.i have a tendency to always see myself as stronger anyway.its built into me for some reason.I later came to see why it works in my case.It made me strong anyway because its the only way i can be.I always act out of line so I always get put into place until i can beat the shit out of whoever puts me in place.eventually no one can do anything anymore since ive been fighting for my life the whole time against basically all kinds of insanely strong and smart people.Threaten me with a battle to the death?.Its always been this way.I'm always all in so no i don't care how many people back you up if what i think you did to me is wrong.Ill fight weather i die or i win.since ive not died i slowly became strong because its the only other possibility left.Similar to a bird throwing a baby out of the nest to make it fly. it either can or cant.staying flightless isn't an option.The ironic thing? i always want to have peace or try to.hence why im always friendly in the dreams. granted the one thing ill admit is my aggressive nature. but its always to me seemed like that's ingrained in me because of being relentlessly pestered/attacked.Then again its possible i have a natural inclination as well.but within that aggression i at least try to be the lesser aggression i can output.it helps to make it a friendly spar instead. Anyway i took this dream as the og snail soul i had "beef" with,(one sided, i never did anything to the guy, he just talked smack for days and yet took even the things i did in my personal life as a personal insult as if they are the arbiter of my morality.it angers me how shameless of a mentality that is when i never felt they were even where i was,let alone in a position to arbitrate.if anyone ever even is which im not sure about. that implies an objective set of rules of morality. if it exist then it likely hasn't been found yet. at least by anyone ive met.) is in a faster timeline growing stronger rapidly and actually throwing shots at me, even though im the one he actually scarred,also weaponizing the victimhood status by calling teach on me.Making me the bad guy again.This is what glowies also will always try and achieve,first make me 'the bad guy' even if im nicer than any would be in such a case.Maybe that's my issue.Always letting myself even a tiny bit open.Maybe it what smiley means with being dangerous.I never understood that since i think only in terms of strength.being toxic on top of that seems pointless then since why would anyone mess with you anyway,and if they do?Just beat them.But if you think about it a porcupine is weak as fuck, but its spiked so most animals leave it alone.A strong animal that didn't have natural weapons or at least seemed dangerous would get fucked with.Even its actually more dangerous to fight.I'm "nice" by nature. although i do hide a lot of darkness and edge like sharpness within that. perhaps i should be outwardly dangerous.The issue is that having a bunch of people to hangout with is also one of the reasons i allowed myself to apparently be a vamp in the first place.As weird as that is to me.(cont)

>>9763 anyway in this ' the guy in the dreams' view, I was 'disrespecting' him even though all i said i could throw him around if i wanted to, after he had already slapped me... This somehow not only warranted him scarring my paper(perhaps this means my soul itself) forever but to abuse the system against me.when i woke up i said fuck it and cut up that guys paper,whoever it was. there's this fundamental misunderstanding of my character. I get it,cutting his paper is in itself a sin.and its bad for me seen from a rational viewpoint to do it since ill get punished.but i never expected to escape that anyway. clearly there is no right way in this system. if someone cuts me i cant cut it back cause thats also adding another sin. yet if i dont they "benefit" relatively speaking compared to myself since im permanently cut up and they arent. even if they technically got punished and in absolute terms experienced detriment because of their sin. basically it still fucked me over permanently and nothing i do within the system would allow me to fix it. so i then have to be actually evil and cut that fucker right back. even if its seen as punishing someone already punished. you cant let people treat you like this in general.especially since it implied permanence. the way the guy misunderstood me: 1 is since im somehow the star pupil in a system that i care about the system at all, that im 'arrogant'(projected) because im the star pupil.meanwhile from my perspective i had no idea this grading system even existed until a few minutes ago.sure it felt "nice" but im not that attached to it. 2 that im strong only cause the system caters to me.Nah,the system tried to kill me many times over and 'caters' to me out of self interest.Same way anyone ever does anything.they supported me cause im strong,not the other way around.any sign of weakness and they attack me. then i get rid of them as well. 3 that i only act this "fearlessly" cause im strong.or think im stronger.no i try to treat people quite decently.ill be honest ive treated smileyface far harsher than i ever treated a lot of people,especially snail and whoever these glowies are.(and even then i always tried to keep it within certain lines with smileyface.im very passionate about some of these subjects.perhaps i shouldn't even say to what degree.people just dont get it.).And if you factor in i come across way harser in my texts than what i mean to say im honestly nice. sometimes im even showing affection but it comes across as someone trying to fight still. since thats what i am i guess.but im saying im way nicer still to people i feel protective of because they feel delicate. If anything i try to be nice to those i see as weak and im kinda harder on those i see as smart or capable. then again im not saying thats smart either.But no ive always been like this. even right up to vampires who promptly tortured me.I even instinctively threatened some one who was supposed to be their leader(i realize they were meming,atleast i hope so-/ i didnt even intend to do that either. it just naturally happens.)its actually only the last few months I got over doing this.and reading the amy poster also made me realize i dont really act out anymore.ive somehow been calmer. it makes sense since glowie attackas have stopped for months now. its basically only just now i get to actually try and be sane in the astral. its somehow happened when smiley talked about amdusias being chill. it kinda calmed that part of me by like 0.1percent but that was enough to stop myself from wilding out. this is why i avoid entitites and never talk to anyone astral at all aside from really cute girls.they calm me at least a bit so i feel less like having to fight.even then im wary. sadly i dont trust any astral being at all. in fact i suspect all astral beings are actually just crazy and you need the physical world to center yourself in but that's another topic. this is why i dont care if you sent some ancient gods at me. if im angry its because in my view ive been GENUINELY wronged. and nothing anyone says will matter.at best i can be suppressed or killed. but that only means ill right the wrong once im strong enough to beat up whoever protecting the bad guy.(in my view). theres some things you just dont do. scarring my paper for eternity because i somehow slighted you by being real with you even though i was genuinely nice and liked you and you felt insecure? yeah whatever. ofcourse this could all be glowies feeling my past irritations and making me relive it again and again to make me angry.i doubt its my actual friend from elementary since why would they suddenly visit me and annoy me all the time?and they were never really like that either.

>>9764 anyway i just remembered i know what this is likely all about. in a dream i was sad and an entity told me to look inside myself why i really felt the way i did in life. suddenly i was back in ww2 fighting and i started crying because all my "comrades" died next to me while kept fighting alone and eventually fell later. i never was able to grieve them. its even stranger since they apparently reincarnated as some of my friends. yet i still have to start grieving... I likely never processed any of this since i didn't even remember why i felt this way. I'm STILL in ww2. fighting to the death...Perhaps i was a german. This is likely also why im so reactive (i say aggressive, but im nice so its more that i am very reactive instead.im honestly not aggressive really.)even though it was a dream i woke up feeling like that had happened just a day ago.

>>9764 I just want to comment that I understand perfectly what you mean by this guy's rudeness, this is what the "spirits" I get attacked by are like. Some of them I later realized were the subconscious of people I was interacting with physically in some way, like a soul of a teacher who was leading the course in Japanese literature I took where I made a breakthrough into a new insight level and my higher self assumed the form of a kitsune. I could feel the guy didn't for some reason like me, but he wasn't able to discredit me based on my knowledge. In this case I'm just guessing now, but his Japanese was crap, he clearly had not studied it at all despite being a teacher in Japanese literature. You don't have to, since it's a history/literature topic, but if you try to read Japanese, like he did, it should at least somewhat feel like you know what Japanese sounds like. I never said anything about this, no one did, but that's the only explanation I could come up with, that he knew this and felt insecure or something. It was over web so he can't have known my reaction, I didn't have the cam on unless speaking. When this fanatical spirit attacked me I gave an ultimatum as I always do with these unless they downright try to kill me, in which case I send them instantly to hell; I simply explained how rude he was and gave him a chance to step back and apologize, but he refused. So I sent that spirit to hell and it screamed "NO" but still didn't feel any shame or guilt over its behaviour. Only after this did I see an image fade which showed it had been incarnated as this teacher.

Now on for the dream I had before waking up: I had intended to start practicing moving into my new incarnation by first going into the astral body I have at the city of magic, which is a legit pleiadan incarnation I got from the Brazilian pyramid where a tribe of hivemind people are upholding the ancient rituals. It's possible to send part of your soul to be incarnated in their hive, and then rise up from there, so that's what I did, and this one in specific has been registered as one out of two main incarnations for me by the maintenance deities. I worked to the degree that I was at the school and did ritual magic with stones laid out in a room and some of my girls were there. Then it shifted to seeing these small white worms crawling on a onion, and wondering what those were. I showed my mum (who refers to someone else in this setting), then went on to look where I got the onion. I found these small white worms crawl on the floor and then on my hand, and I had now shifted into a furbeast form with dark black/blue fur and claws. There were two small white worms crawling on my left paw, I brushed them off and then woke up. This seems to correlate with my previous experience where I perceived similar white worms to be the physical thoughtform from the brain, which was suddenly ejected when I sneezed. It's happened before where what seems like "biological material" has been physically ejected from my body, and one time I sure it was a literal piece of brain structure which was the physical manifestation of some societal Mk-ultra programming from society. It was a similar situation of sneezing, or coughing etc and something comes out, but this time I thought it was a piece of some plant and just threw it away. Moments later my mind backtracked and I thought "what the hell was that". I've read these stories earlier on the FG website where someone had a titanium screw in their hip and it was suddenly ejected from the body when they were sitting in meditation, leaving a small hole in the skin, but the bone had healed. I think the white worms were some kind of thinking, and going by the argument in the Arena yesterday, I think they are related to the "white" stuff which I want to get rid of. So that's what they look like to me, intestinal worms taking the form of "thoughts" in the brain which must be removed, because its a parasite.

>>9777 You know what,you're right. I'll ask them first to apologize. I had already tried sending to hell after reading this but I skipped the apologize part. This way I think it's better.this guy could be a real mage though who might keep coming back but then again what can I do about this low level disrespect,bait tactic. The idea that is actually me elementary friends soul somehow would be funny though. In their view I was just a guy and not as incredibly strong as I suddenly would seem. In reality I was but that's spiritually/mentally.so it only becomes obvious when you become Astral. The dynamic actually makes sense if these people are actually the souls of the people I met in life. Think about it. Your soul gets ejected from your body and now this random dude is apparently the king of this realm your in(since it his mind itself) even though he was a classmate seemingly.it makes even more sense when you know what I actually act like.What's weird is the people involved are very consistent,many friends i had never show up and some people i spoke to a few times in life always do its not just based on what i felt about them in life.Now this best friend in elementary was my friend for real,like weirdly close always around each other type shit. Then in high school I learned he'd been talking trash about me behind my back,well maybe not that but a girl told me he wasnt really my friend and that told me enough in itself.perhaps it's kinda repeated itself in snail as well.who perhaps i somehow saw as similar. I'm weirdly not a very nice person at all but it seems like there's this thing when I like someone I really go all in all of a sudden.And weirdly enough it's the exact type of persona than would hate me that causes me to behave like this. There must be something within myself attracting me to them. I think me being very "extraverted" as a kid creates a natural big brother energy where I'm the big brother.but me acting so foolish then causes double resentment.since they might think I'm an idiot secretly but can't say it to me either. Hell they might not even realize it's true since I haven't actually shaken them around. Sometimes I do fight people in dreams and they seem bewildered.Maybe they think they are still alive and in a physical reality.

I have two recurring dreams. one where i am pulled in the sky by some force, usually a strong intelligent wind or storm, and the other involves the moon slowly falling to earth. i also found a waiting room or nexion in this one deep space dream but i couldn't unlock it. the sky and moon ones are no longer nightmares and i just go with it, sometimes its cool in a morbid way. as for entities, i have had two waking encounters on the way to sleep, one was a large shadow man and the other was a black smoke thing with a light orb in the center. the third entity was in the dream itself. i thought it was just another npc to interact with since i can somewhat maneuver consciously due to reading my mothers books on these things, but after pursuing it, it paid attention to me and i could literally feel it was foreign. it had a cold and passive or reserved inhuman disposition and was noticibly different to my usual characters.

Anomalous Dream Experience: I was outside at some place that resembled an amusement park, an artificial environment with lots of meandering paths and groups of people wandering around. My dog had run away and refused to listen to me, so I was following him and trying to catch him. For some reason I started crawling on my hands and knees at some point, and accidentally planted my hand into some stranger's blood that was dribbled on the concrete. This was particularly upsetting to me because I would be forced to touch other things, (like my dog's leash) and figure out how to sanitize them before I could relax. Cut to the next segment, I was trying to take a shower but my mom was standing right around the corner between the bathroom door and my room's door (this layout was unlike anywhere we've ever lived, but it does seem vaguely familiar). I asked her to move so that I could go to my room safely when I'm finished with my shower but she started trying to argue about how she's actually in front of the laundry room and not my room or the bathroom (which was entirely beside the point) This next segment is where it gets interesting, but difficult to describe. I had lots of inner turmoil from the preceding events, but then I was a completely different person while still containing the thoughts and energy of suffering. I had forgotten who I am and became fully immersed in being this schizophrenic black guy ranting in his car. Over time I became lucid and started to remember who I am, and gradually detached myself from being the other guy, instead being myself sitting in my own car in a dark parking lot. It was just like lucid dreaming in that I was looking at my hands and paying attention to my bodily awareness to anchor myself in "reality" (which led me to falsely believe that myself in the car was wakefulness) Yet I had 2 different "sights" simultaneously and of equal vividness, the other being what had become a dashboard POV of this guy sitting in his car. So I'm just sitting there trying to handle this experience, frightened but reminding myself that I'm safe and in control of my environment, focusing on the reality of my hands and my body in the seat. Meanwhile this dude is so fucking loud ranting crazy shit at me. He spoke in what could be mistaken for the average negroidal vernacular, but it was actually kind of unique and distinct. I cannot emphasize enough the intensity, the mutual empathic terror we felt, and the steadily rising volume of his voice Finally he pulled out a gun and put it to his temple, and his last words went something like this: You know what kind of pain I'm in. I's gonna show you, where I is at... PAIN! When he pulled the trigger I was instantly relieved and grateful that he wasn't me. However my relief was short-lived as a dangerously powerful gust of wind, visibly carrying massive amounts of sand and dust, began to blow in the direction toward my windshield. I felt anxiety about how I'm unable to leave the car or even drive away. But just then I became lucid for real, and woke up doubly grateful that none of it really happened, including the blood incident. After I woke up and recorded everything to the best of my ability, I tried to fall back asleep. In hypnogogia I saw a woman with a matronly figure wearing a black mask and what resembled both a French maid outfit and a nun's habit, beckoning me into the darkness with a gloved hand. I was afraid but I knew it was for my own good. Unfortunately my body was still too excited to immerse myself and follow her like I felt compelled to do. I did sleep more that night, but can't remember if I dreamed again. So what was this experience, really? Was I simply reintegrating a disturbed fragment of myself? Did some local hobowizard telepathically force me to witness his suicide? Or both?

>>9920 >In hypnogogia I saw a woman with a matronly figure wearing a black mask and what resembled both a French maid outfit and a nun's habit, beckoning me into the darkness with a gloved hand. You need to be extremely careful with that. I would advise you next time to ask this figure the three questions of what she is, what she wants to do with you, and by what or whose authority she's there. Otherwise, you're going to get fucked, and not in a good way.

>>9995 >Degenerate flag You appear to have the impression that it was a fetish thing, because of her outfit. While I would probably find her sexy under normal circumstances, I wasn't really thinking of her that way at all. This dark feminine archetype seems to show up every time I have a profound experience >>3395 >>3480 I've never ever felt threatened by her at all. It was all beyond words but this time I felt like she was inviting me to have another experience like the one I had that same night, and that it would also be uncomfortable, painful and scary but I would come out of it better off.

Malicious Man experience So the dream starts with me laying in bed looking at my office where a printed out document detailing some interactions i had with some online person. my mom enters me and ask me what that is and why i printed it,but i printed no such thing.I stay calm but i can already tell something paranormal must have been going on and someone put that there. Suddenly im in this place where its like an online forum and some guy who feels like a vampire asks me if i want them to teach me. they feel kinda scary,angry so im like nah im good. this tilts them completely and they go of the chain. They keep harassing me and make sigils to create incredibly powerful curses on me. one being to give me eternal suffering. Eventually im in a house with my sister and this guy is still out there angry at me,not even realizing how evil and petty he really is it seems. he starts a huge forest fire and i run then run back for my wallet since surviving while destitute isn't easy either. i take my sister and basically tell her we need to run through the forest. we keep running and actually evade the fire but then the internet wizard keeps lightning fire right where we are. So now he is even trying to attack innocent people here. Anyway for some reason it ends in this "event" where at the start i can pull a ticket. theres stripes and letters and when you have every letter of a word you get what the word says. its all handled by a lady in front and the rewards are sexual. like the first is seeing her books and the second getting your dick sucked etc..one of the guys who always shows up in these dreams and i suspect is an agent using a past friends of mine appearance wins the boob award and i see him touching her.the whole party has some metal like aesthetic. in the end the internet wizard reveals he is "the transistor of the universe" even though that doesn't make sense. and explains how he created the universe or in this case reality to have a place to make people suffer for his entertainment. he is a dark wizard god and invincible. anyway that guy felt really serious,and those curses need to be dealt with. i already did what i could but the guy was very much feeling like a vampire.

>>10682 Sounds like a pretty accurate astral representation of some recent events here.

>>10686 wtf I didn't get a ticket

>>10682 Is this green crystal-related? >>10696 You did, but it expired. The lady was going to let you see her library.

>>10702 >Is this green crystal-related? Not that I know of. They wish they were Illuminati, but they really aren't. As dangerous as these witches are, Colombian Farc are closer to that standard by far. They just seem a lot less harmful because all they actually *do* outside of their own country is to sell cocaine. The do however have influence everywhere in the west as a result of this. Their psychics are possibly 3rd or even 2nd in the world after Russia. (can't tell if China is better than them or not, possibly China is weaker despite being more in numbers)

>>10704 Someone wanted to counter the "green crystals" by creating "blue crystals", and an open declaration of intent on fighting the witches will probably bring them here to curse the threat to death.

>>10720 That won't work because the blue crystal was created originally by the triton-lady who also made the green version. They can try hexing, but it's using the same technology and will just absorb it. That was their reaction after I made mine, and it had no negative effect even after 2 days of actively trying to attack me. It'll just go into the blue crystal and become my own energy to use, same for the other guy. They'd have to use some external method of hexing for any effect to get through, but then they're outside of their area of skill so not likely to do much.

Egg anon you were in my dreams last night. You and 2 others from /fringe/ whose flag I did not recognize had our own commune I guess in an apartment or something. I am sorry to tell you this but in the dream you were doing weed, alcohol, and meth. I was trying to explain to you that alcohol, weed, and magic mushrooms are kind of okay even if I personally am really anti drug but that meth was really not okay. Also maybe a week ago smiley was in my dreams. We were playing ark in the dreams and he made an inflatable paddle boat or something. Irl though he has stopped playing ark much and wants to play dota 2 with me and doom.

>>10858 I have started listening to frequency videos again because I need to do something to get away from these entities attacking me. Mostly just ones that get kill and/or rid of 'em, but some of 'em are ones that remove or transmute negative energies so those qualify as some kinda drugs. Also the 2nd medium I visited a few days ago told me that I need to start getting some kinda caffeine or other stimulant into my diet, so that's probably where the meth part came from. The alcohol and/or weed are probably entertainment I guess. There's also the anxiety pill I took the night before last, but I didn't take one last night.

>>10859 I recommend only green tea if you don't want to become a caffeine fiend. Oolong and puerh are great too, but they're more uncommon than your Chinese and Japanese greens.

I had a dream that a sizeable portion of my consciousness was inhabited by Kali. It was difficult to quantify because she would divide exponentially into halves, quarters, eighths, sixteenths, etc. which were smaller Kalis but I also remember multiples of 3 such as 6, 12, 24, 48, etc. It may have had something to do with having read this fraction >>11040 but I'm not sure if I simply generated a weird dream based on it, or if it gave me a lens of association to perceive something that is actually there. Might as well mention the night before, too. I dreamed lots of different stuff which wasn't very interesting except when I managed to lucid dream and willfully incarnate with full immersion, in a way that I've never experienced before. It started when I was in a nicely decorated bedroom with an oversized bed taking up most of the floor-space. Two small, fluttering abstract cartoon-like (yet 3D) "birds" came in the window and immediately started harassing me and flying into my face. One was yellow, one was blue. I killed the yellow one with some kind of bladed tool, and then someone told me that I killed the correct one, and the bed actually belonged to the blue bird as evidenced by the framed picture of him directly above the headboard (which I hadn't noticed until the moment they pointed it out) Something about the setting or the conclusion of that scenario triggered full lucidity, and I found that I was able to drill my consciousness further into the dream, creating a small hole that resembled a slightly ridged circle-shaped cookie cutter, although my drill-like "spinning" and the hole weren't actually visual so I don't know how to explain how I even perceived this. I was then 100% lucid and had full control of my astral body and it was pretty exciting as usual. I experimented with moving around and thought about what kind of cool shit I should do but after what felt like a few minutes, I started to lose it and felt myself sinking back into the abyss of hypnagogia. I was in fact able to replicate the drilling motion through concentration, though it wouldn't "stick" like before. Something else I noticed is that night my subconscious was full of both lust and grief. The lust I actually like because it's inner fire, but the grief is pretty bad. I'm going to have to face it soon.

>>11047 >>11047 >had a dream that a sizeable portion of my consciousness was inhabited by Kali. It was difficult to quantify because she would divide exponentially into halves, quarters, eighths, sixteenths, etc. which were smaller Kalis but I also remember multiples of 3 such as 6, 12, 24, 48, etc. That is something she can do. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kali In her legend there was an undefeatable demon because whenever he dropped a Blood he reborn from that drop when it reached the ground. So Kali drank his blood then awakened Shiva by stepping on him. Seems like she managed to overtake your "demons" in a way. This denotes a tantric practice how you cannot kill nor defeat evil but you can "drink it" then transmute it into the true force of destruction. Or the true reality she is trying to represent. Your other dream looks nice too. The blue bird might have been Kali. Birds have strange symbolism. Sometimes they represent the consciousness. Like how the consciousness is a bird and our body is a mere "nest" for that bird. I have met the Garuda and other birds during my practice but I wouldn't call myself knowledgeable about them. They can represent many things. Birds and snakes are the most widely used animal symbols in spirituality for a reason.

I had a dream where I was a female drow and went around doing stuff, then it ended with me lying in a hammock eating raw ground meat by cutting slices off a pressed together square shaped packet like those from the store. When waking up I could still feel the taste and texture of the raw meat and how it filled me up. It didn't feel disgusting, just unusual.

>>11581 Eating raw meat is getting pretty common these days.

Interesting dream. Kept talking to the fringe group or maybe vampire enthusiast group who convince me to go to this "event" at night. It's at this park with a lake somewhere.I arrive and new earth anon is holding this ceremony. There's a bunch of people there. Meanwhile the ceremony is going on. Seems to be about vampires especially famida. Who feels like this celebrity everybody wants to meet and is talking about. I'm sitting on this bench next to this girl who might actually be a vampire low key who is talking about what is happening. The new earth guy is beating drums and such,all the fringe guys seem happy and "in the know". Meanwhile it's about 0:30 am and I wonder if I shouldn't be at home right now instead of whatever this is...that being said it is "interesting" and nice so I'm thinking of how I'll get back after a few hours. On the grass there's this mansion and people get in for the next stage of the event.i walk in and it's like this media type thing as well.like with someone at the entrance and even a photographer in the living room. They are documenting this emergence of vampire enthusiasts.theres this feeling the people invited here are also "well known" because of this.it might only be a handful people.Anyway I see a cake and and it's for a birthday.its apparently famida's I guess her human life 14th birthday. Which is a bit weird. I'm thinking what?and think maybe that's her official age in the books but that's kinda low. Suddenly my dad and his girlfriend are there and are like wow you know some rich people,they told us to come here to meet you. I'm like yeah...then some people hand out presents and apparently I was given 2 huge half open bag of chips by Famida. I'm actually really happy with this present since In real life I tend to snack on chips a bit too much when I have them available and im in a rather "face value" type of mood right now.some people get me and tell me she wants to see me upstairs. As I walk on the stairs my nose and my inability to breathe catches up to me and I wake up in he middle of the night. I get the strong impression I wasn't supposed to be able do that.maybe it saved me,who knows. Then again the vibe I get was slightly more leaning to it going to have been a positive experience. Still hanging out alone in some place like that (the stairs were silent) was sketchy. When I woke up my brain had also felt like I had been asleep for longer than I would have normally given the familiar pain of being oxygen deprived.it seemed like it would have normally been extremely hard to wake up from this. I'll say that before all this I watched a video of her and I got a very warm feeling of her. I tend to do that though. It's likely where I experience people differently then normal. It's cause I myself work differently so I interact I'm different ways. Entities that might be nice to most might be incredibly harsh with me and sometimes aggressive beings I get to relax with.theres a deeper level to it than what new earth calls rapport which is more a technique. Since I pretty much am extremely "giving" with MY energy in the Astral. Which means if you are able to sync with me we get along. Otherwise I'm seen as crazy and attacked or they get disturbed by what I represent.so far the only person I've been fully myself around and was still seemingly accepting was famida,who atleast in my interactions has a very similar inner energy.or one that repairs me instead of attacks.atleast she was the first one to be able to actually vibe with it.vamps in general seem more "amused" by it than angered but hers it seems can actually get into it,even the vibe she gives of in her early video is very similar.this likely relates to snail thinking I don't have the ability to grasp "seriousness" which might be a thing.thats likely part of what my nature will seem to manifest as when interacting with people. Altleast in interactions with energy famida has a very healing feeling.i remember even in the past sensing energies from certain "edgy women" who might not even had clean energy like a vampire does. But also had a paradoxically healing effect on me. Seemingly because its an energy closer to what I relate to. It's really unlike a grays,which is why they were so peeved about me,strange that I even am a gray. Some entities seem to either not consider me a gray at all or just say it's a form I'm encased/trapped in it. Maybe that's precisely why I'm a gray in the first place.

>>11590 Future not-yet-inhabited-100% me is currently learning how to play African drums to use for rituals (because it's the origin of techno/trance music and dance). I felt over the past few days that I don't know if I'm actually talking to someone's aware mind here, or if it's a projection of their subconscious into my timeline. Maybe it's a conversion of what the board looks like "out there" and it feels "trance like" to me here, with the posts being adapted to fit in, and not being actually exactly what the person wrote over there. This last night I had a dream where I was the daughter of a "vile", a dark and insanely powerful god from the anime I've been watching, from 1-2 years ago. Its title is so generic it may as well be "We had a decent budget and a good team of animators, so we made an isekai cheat skill anime". I can't even say exactly what the real title is because that's what it is. In the dream, I was at a registration office desk, which felt like a combination of a migration office and one of those guild registration desks. I was talking to a woman who seemed like the guild representative, but she was harsher in tone, which made it feel more like I'd expect it would be when applying to migrate someplace. She looked at my information which was gathered from somewhere without asking me, and had assumed I was speaking Japanese as first language, based on my mind having mostly Japanese writing dominating over the "language and meaning" area. She didn't know Japanese and tried reading something which was supposed to be Japanese written in Romaji from a piece of paper. I had to try correcting her pronunciation, then I realized my cheek muscles felt unused to speaking, and I wasn't able to say it right. I then tried explaining to her that she should probably use English with me, but I then realized the sentences wouldn't form automatically in my brain when trying to say this. I was thinking perfectly fine but it was in "meaning" and not language like when you form your thoughts and say them. I realized my energy was different, and "monstruous" and the front part of my brain right inside the forehead had just this thick black string of energy like the protective iron guard on a helmet, if placed over the forehead instead of the jaw. I then woke up, and realized my thoughts "didn't work", and the "iron guard" was my main connection between the front parts of the brain. I lay in this mostly asleep state and tried formulating sentences for a while in different languages and it felt like I had to "thinkin around" an area that didn't "have anything", but eventually it worked out. Now that I'm fully awake, I don't have a problem, but I can tell my thinking is forming around this metal railing rather than as it used to. I'm positive my actual base incarnation shifted to this astral form.

>>11591 Its still me,your other lives have even talked to me. I finally get you overall "deal" and why some of your lives behave so strangely to me.It wast you being a killer but you being "story" like or fictional feeling to me in some lives while being real. It's because you actually enact a method called "Elitism". Glowies piss you off since they use the exact same "rare" method of enlightenment but they fail so it looks retarded. Technically the average vamp likely only does it the same way a glowie does. However a vamp has the other part innately so they didn't have to be aware. All a vamp needs to try is to see humans as cattle.that creates the wall.glowies actually sometimes emulate vamps perfectly but the wall in itself does little to save you so they end up I'm hell still.a human can't kill another human. That's a sin almost always. Instead they would have needed to emulate you instead. Since you actually also maintained your own standard,especially I assume after the ripper life. This was to make sure you get seen as above human or atleast one rung above the ones you want to kill.then it's more like a human killing animals,which can still be bad but is manageable karma wise.vamps for many reasons don't need to know all of this anyway.only at highest levels of functioning for them. But a human would need to atleast be elite vamp in mentality to be able to kill and have it be valid. Very unlikely. Maintaining what I perceive as elegance and dressing up and such is part of it as I see it.it helps you mentally achieve this. BTW when I met your current life they seem like this "chill yoga nerd" who I'd see drink a latte and have a youtube channel.except that they have a big yellow energy as well.and its bright feeling. In fact some girl I feel is a life or aspect of you said they were "peaceful" atleast compared to the average in the day.they saw it as people being rowdy and savage in comparison.also got the feeling that starting for example a bar fight was almost seen as more extreme or alteast a sign of bad character than just stabbing someone.its more about how wild someone is which makes them savage.

>>11591 Indeed they were playing a djembe African drum.

>>11594 >djembe African drum I think I mentioned I took a course in that, so it's natural it would resurface. I haven't really had time to actually use it in-context (as a ritual drum), but it's something I want to do. >>11593 Check my posts in the intrusive thoughts thread about the actual "glowie" light bulb space station, I think that's the real meaning of the word, and the whole "white" vs anything conflict. Maybe you can also actually use the grimoire I linked there behind a spoiler. I think you are maybe right, but one aspect is that in my past lives I was always physical demon race (orc evolved into looking like a light skinned human) and wasn't able to make it into the Pleiadan race at all, which is necessary to become a "real" witch or vampire in ancient standard, because those are all angels in a sense. It's not as bad for a demon to kill another race, because it's in their nature to do so. Pleiadans are allowed to do this ritually because angels make them do it, so it's by order of God. For other races, it varies. Mushrooms can do it because they're "monster" and don't have standards, but in return, there is no rule against killing monsters in the first place, so anyone can do the same to them. That makes it uneven and creates "elitism" since only demon and Pleiadan derived races are allowed to kill other races freely with no automatic "right" to retaliate against them. To use an example: Mushroom kills a Pleiadan. Ok because mushroom is a monster, BUT, anyone can now kill the mushroom because they are a monster. In reverse: A Pleiadan kills a Mushroom. This is ok because Pleiadan act by order of angels, and Mushrooms are monsters. No one is allowed to retaliate against the Pleiadan because they carry out the order of God. It's similar with demons, who stem from orcs. Because they are monsters at the core, they are allowed to kill anyone. But anyone can also retaliate against them when they follow the "monster" nature. The difference here is that if you use "ritual" you can emulate the channelling of angels and higher beings, in which case it counts "order by angels" and then it's not allowed to retaliate. So the example most people bring up, would be black on white violence in America. Although I haven't looked closer at this, there is a possibility this is considered "allowed" by higher standards depending on which kind of black it is. Some of them could be the "copper skin Pleiadan" race, some could be "orc practicing ritual", which is similar to demon. That means if the killed person was "white mushroom, it's not allowed to retaliate. And this make is look unfair, but it's because it's more likely a black person is an evolved orc (following ritual) or a "black" Pleiadan (following angels) than it is likely that a "white mushroom" is following any kind of ritual. So by cosmic law, it will end up being "justified" with violence against those seen as "white" more often than in the other direction, except when the white is a Pleiadan. This of course upsets everyone who ends up on the "non ritual" "non angel" side, which could be both "white mushroom" and "black mushroom".

>>11597 Makes sense, that indeed doesn't seem all that fair.You being a demon in all lives makes way more sense.i always interpreted it as a white person "like me" which i guess would really then mean brown mushroom not that i was aware what that is. And that you then became a demon each time by changing your mindset that greatly since. I have no idea what white mushroom,brown mushroom and even demons are like tbh.I only have you as a demon and me as a brown mushroom to compare to.maybe some family members. makes sense why i hold "self defense" to the highest value then, since as a mushroom i innately know the system ain't gonna help me.so i always see warfare in simple terms. to me once the killing starts its a matter of grouping up and trying to kill the tribe attacking you. failing to do so feels then evil to me. perhaps this is mushroom mentality where you have to go all the way.this is then actually correct for them since it gives them at least a tiny chance of winning depending on how much the attackers get backed up.doing nothing means no one will ever protect you so you instantly die.Whereas other races can at least count on "divine law". Damn even the grey race i was from was also a monster derived grey. maybe that's why whats simple to me is hard to grasp.i always saw it as simple 1d.you also have it but you have a lot of stuff beyond it. with me after 3d it gets intellectual. And most people i see as having a higher way of seeing things lack 1d common sense.Ive always felt white liberals as lacking 1d sense they are gay and talk smack about whites(so themselves). being gay has always felt like the inversion of 1d somehow. or at least below it. it feels inverted to me in some way. inverted 2d i think actually. since my 2d was just being really horny all the time/ maybe since brown mushroom girls are asexual brown mushroom guys are very high libido. makes sense, all men in my family are like that. 3d is the last level i learned to the point of being "easy"anything i had above that exists but is almost like i'm channeling myself.my baseline is either 1d or 3d since i lack a lot of desire at all. Self hating whites are then the lowest of the low to me. I guess since it's -1d similar to a gay. Also perhaps why i never saw whites really as this huge "imperialist" king that modern people claim but as an underdog that could easily be erased by naivety and stupidity and being careless.likely its that i still understood that nobody is there to back us up if we ever need it. I perceived whites as always sticking up for other races though(im sure you disagree but thats what i see.) and always knew that if it was reverse it would never happen.sure some of it was self serving, but any other group wouldnt even pretend to care,its weird anyway.well i was right.everybody in social media that's black is now saying its europe being taking back as 'revenge" i always knew this but they never said it openly,bet you 90 percent of white still wouldn't believe me if i told them, these people crying about equality were always lying and i knew it,as soon as they were in a position of strength it would flip, and it has started to happen in many places.as expected.I learned never to really expect anything decent from people and my ability to predict things went far higher.I do resent and hate them for lying and being cowardly in my view.even straight up fighting would be better (before now, since europe to me is already dead and cant really fight.)Modern white people i just feel bad for. i cant bring myself to hate them at all.They have no idea how hard the deck was stacked against them even hundreds of years ago.And they still had it better then.maybe thats since im closer to them genetically,even though not really. since only a handful of brown mushrooms exist apparently and the white ones don't anymore,and likely weren't as similar to me as i thought since i always thought everybody could think like me but they didnt try.which makes sense since everything i know is still rather "mundane" in the sense im not mostly channeling knowingly or doing crazy shit.i also saw demons and orks and pleidians as exactly the same as me i guess since i never thought about it so maybe i was always a 0.1 percent race.Like if met you in the past it would just be a white girl to me and i would see them as part of my "in" group. really my "in" group should have been i guess brown mushrooms which makes sense since i liked the whole medieval wizard thing and apparently thats what they make.Luckily atleast muse is technically mushroom and she kinda salvaged my view of them in a sense. Im a bit like those birds raised by other birds or dogs who act like cats.Guess you too as a demon but you never had that group based thinking,makes sense if demon portrayal is accurate. its not that extreme for me since assume white mushrooms were somewhat similar.maybe lacking self awareness.And now that i think of it a lack of group organizing instinct. maybe white liberals are then a white mushroom trait since i cant relate to being that careless and honestly filled with hubris to think the people you talk smack to about people that look like you wont hurt you in the future.they will and they won't care about which white was an "ally" your rhetoric will fuel them to target you and your family as well.being an "ally" really just means "idiot whose gonna get killed when we win",oh well they wanted it. Honestly im burned out on even being on earth,let alone being a human let alone being a mushroom.Maybe ill be a vamp.Had i at any time before this escaped i likely would have left quick.I thought i did and it took me 1 second to stop caring about vamps and i tried to high tail it outta here.Maybe thats why all the dreams since are these super nice dreams where i connect with them.ive found my hatred and distaste lessen over time,specifically for vamps.even the first one where i saw the identical daughters was unusually positive, the first dreams actually had me trying to be killed and tortured but lets not bring up that.Maybe they got intrigued seeing how resistant i am.they are making it so ill actually stay and not escape as soon as i see the astral.At one point some vamp tried taking something and i just took it back but i didnt even try to fight them anymore. they wondered why since i tried to fight all of them but i guess i dont want to anymore,its always been fruitless with the higher types anyway.At least as far as i can tell the version of me i see in dreams is happy. at least was when i first received the dreams. i know this since they were thinking of very simple stuff like what to buy in a store. that day to day thinking implies being happy to me.

>>11600 Also it still makes little sense to me that apparently whites had this huge occult bad guy "team" out there.I just saw that now vikings are said to not have been white. this erasure of not just the people but rewriting the history and lying is just nasty to me.And doenst seem like whites ever had any real institutional power.taking everything good away and ascribing all sins to whites is all i see. which becomes funny as i hear blacks now claiming european royalty. what? they colonized themselves?genocided natives? likely not since they'll only steal what they like. even if it doesnt make sense and would logically make them the colonizers instead. Anyway with all that in mind and apparently these guys being defeated only recently then they really did fuck all for any white people and fuck them for the vax as well,which is bad anyway and largely targeted whites and japanese.Plus the world feels better since they were defeated.Maybe i was being targeted or its just a wide area effect. so if i understand whites were a white fungus race with genetic weakness to other fungus, were controlled by giant pyramid floating spaceship guys as slaves, were attacked and mind controlled by jews who were actually the greys trying to get rid of them.Also controlled by eu glowies using evil antennas on them from undergound to set them astray for whatever plan.were fucked over in ww2 with timeline magic by white "elites",it also seems all the eu elites were significantly less sensible than the average people i see.were eaten by both vamps and reptillians.loosh drained by everybody and on top of that were created as sacrifices. oh and europe was an atlantean sacrificial temple anyway. great.oh yeah and even their own evil group among all these others also fucked them over to get even more negative loosh as well for some kind of death star.Oh yeah, and even if you arent white you're 99 percent likely to be cattle if your not a reptilian since of course its death camp on top of all of it and you have implants.that last part kinda makes sense since you wouldn't end up here normally i guess. Honestly writing it out does make it seem unlikely and like you have to be kidding here.This place is crazy.

>>11601 that being said, it makes sense.

>>11602 also despite my rant i feel really quite nice recently.

>>11601 The whole thing is a mess, and untangling it in the past few days with the "bulb" conclusion isn't something I expected, or expect anyone who can't astrally view it, to believe or understand. But not sharing it at all when it's a major thing like this is also wrong. Basically it's layer after layer with double agents here. The "white" aliens who look like greys, had a bad lower level of their group, which did all the loosh farming of negativity. Among them are better people who look similar, and it was out of them 600 000 agreed to stop vaxxing and move into my space station a few years ago. Now after I managed to infiltrate this "glowie bulb" and reverse engineer it, and with help from my Russian waifus created a ritual for is so a group of us made our own astral version of it, these 600k aliens also followed the procedure and then said they are happy this way and will move out. They used their new power to overthrow their own previous management and just said basically >fuck this, we don't care about the 5G vaxx system which was inserted during Covid, so they deleted their part of it and just handed control over to 3 of them who'll stay with me because I have a personal relation with them. So they started an in-group bureaucratic war against their "own" group to take over, and it's been going on since, there are a large number of the negative types, and they all use injections as a standard method to weaken "rebels". It's not for helping anyone, they even admitted now that they just spread illnesses and mind control them to stop them from causing problems so they can harvest more energy. They still do this against those who are now fighting back against the change. The difference is it's not aimed at us here on Earth anymore. "White" is like "grey", a genetically engineered standard. They didn't look like that to begin with. Most of them are fungal though, contrary to greys who were something else. I saw your original form as pic related, remember? You should aim to restore your astral form to this.

>>11604 Do you think I'm the same soul as the earlier jackal one from 2024 and I only recently became a gray? I'm trying to turn back but it's hard so say what exactly I looked like.

>>11605 Right now it's a bit weird. I think I get now why I thought "you" had really moved into new Earth and I was talking to "your" subconscious before. I think that's what really happened. But I also noticed what I thought was a timeline shift some hours ago. Things looked very different in an inexplainable way. Just the colour of the landscape and all of that, after which you said on here that you're definitely here and not someone's subconscious. Well now you aren't. I don't see the same NEET I talked to actively before. But you all got Muse so that part can't be used to determine who I'm talking to. You do appear to be a grey, but your form differs from skinny bob. Head is larger with even skinnier body, and eyes are angled huge black almond shape. The original form I get is similar, but not dark colour like the pic I posted, it looks more like someone with very sharp predator teeth and light blue fur. Let me try and do some energy wash through to see if I can restore some of your original form.

>>11607 I do feel rather "clear". Maybe it's the wash. Yeah maybe the other neet went to new earth.

>>11607 How did i do? tried becoming what you call my prior form. lately i think i am more telepathic, i also realize its really just humans->telepaths->ageless all the other stuff? just ageless telepaths setting up narratives.I really dont think elites would fight like that.unless vamps and all really are real. its way more simple than people think, hence why they dont explain it.

>>11651 I saw a beast human with light blue fur and sharp teeth staying around on my right side during the night, kinda thought it was you, so I think you're mostly back to "normal" again. >I really dont think elites would fight like that What do you mean "like that"? Unless you see it, you won't think it's real. It's far more stupid than I would have ever imagined. You have to think of them as viruses or bacteria in nature but on a macro scale. Like how pollen spreads with the wind and lands everywhere, insects hatch from eggs after the winter birds feed their kids with the insects and 1% of them survive, and then it starts over next year. It's just nature in action.

>>11653 I didnt have a dream this night as far as i can remember so maybe thats why. Im not sure exactly if im a different soul, id say i feel more distant yet more easily able to be friendly especially with yourself.Distant in the sense i have little cares comparatively.yet friendlier in a sense?If the grey really isnt me then they were a very rather grim or "dark" soul who was rather tired of anything dark ironically. The idea of you killing them and then having to also be a vamp killing people was a bit much.i got the sense back then of being very "bad" or evil and crazy in past lives, and finally realizing its not what i really want on a deeper level.so going back to being a vamp even though its technically way higher seemed like going backwards.I(when i was a gray) also thus tired strongly of the whole "egregore"ripper thing. likely why i left it years ago. i couldnt even watch that show about vamps you talked about.Its just nasty to me. in fact real life vamps are actually better.Real vamps i could actually like,a little bit and in a non vampire like interaction. Currently I feel less attached to any of it which is a relief.Albeit im somehow finding myself talking to the vamps anyway.since i know they exist likely,im not trying to but i just do without meaning it.but this is part of my challenge with telepathy. as to your second inquiry. What i mean is that what i see is more like "you are in the in group or out". And it seems the main differentiator is telepathy. and real one is being unaging. you would be "part of them" so its weird you have to fight. what i felt coming through in telepathy was more like fights are barely even real. hell theres seems to be many non aging people just out there. i have half a mind to suspect vamps are just non aging humans larping. since the "elites" i felt were more like regular people using freemasonry parables to inject into the narrative. yet they also seemed "non aging".vampirism could just then be a meme to communicate the idea of immortality. kinda like how people use alchemy. although that might actually be the real deal.the people i see out there feel more like that than like vamps to me.implying the elites are more like alchemists.

>>11659 I don't think this is something you need to think about, you are too ethereal and can't connect to it. It's not as simple as there just being an inside and an outside. There's also a "pretend-inside" where the high level masons and illuminatis reside. There are conflicts at each layer, they just change nature. The only time you don't experience them is when you're completely stagnant and not really interacting with anyone, so no one gets upset about anything you do (because you don't do anything).

I just woke up from a dream that I was at my grandma's house. She was confronting me in an advisory sort of way about my dreams, including this one >>9920 and some others. She told me that I have to learn to accept death, and to be comfortable inside myself. I was embarrassed both that she knew about my dreams which I had not told her (I'd assumed that someone I did tell relayed them to her, but realistically she would've had to read them on /fringe/ to know about them) and that she knew about my suicidality. She then went on to say she would buy me a book called "Black Magic" as soon as she could afford it, which would help with these things. I thought about how old she is, and how each year is like a 'level' in a video game. My dog who died (the really, really special one) began licking my face and I woke up. To me, this dream is obviously a form of guidance. Not sure about that "Black Magic" though. That's pretty mysterious.

Oh man, a lot happened today. First another dream of my former best friend. I'm in class alone being taught seemingly math. And then an actual class of people enters the class. Behind me is this former best friend,who I feel thinking to himself "what's THIS guy doing here?!" He sits down behind me with disdain clear.this guy it the programming dude and apparently has a phd degree in programming.He cant help himself from making snide remarks.I can tell he views me as an angry vegeta sees goku. Some bumfuck go happy idiot who just walks around where he doesn't belong.its actually worse than that since vegeta kinda gets it.Maybe more how the antagonists see son wukong. Some simple monkey who maybe has achieved things by happenstance.They brag a bit an let me know I'm beneath them in programming. I'm like alright and instantly assume the role they see me as. I say all the things that would trigger an expert programmer. Anticipating in advance what he will say.i perfectly play the role and even brag about very simple things(which I didn't even do) just to piss him of a bit.i have some real life experience programming at a rather simple level and I have a general understanding of what beginners say that pisses senior developers of. I like this guy in reality(meaning during the dream)since they are my bestest friend to me,and I admire the skills they have and especially the dedication needed to reach it. But it's doesn't seem to work both ways.so to me this is lighthearted, triggering a guy who cares way too much about being "better. Genuinely hoping they stop attacking me and start being nice.however they become extremely angry in a bad way. Me acting like a fool plays right into his notions of me so he believes it.i gently make things more and more absurd. In a sense letting him "win" by saying incresingly retarded stuff.this is part of my general humor,making things absurd or even pretending to brag about stuff I'm ever so slightly a beginner at. At some point I snap my hands and a mini wheeled robot drives to me. I tell the guy I programmed this. He seethes angrily and yells"that is EASY for me" at this point i had already somewhat realized im dreaming hence why i was able to make the robot appear but they dont seem to realize,just being angry at how reacting to a snap sound isnt that impressive and they could program it too.I actually didn't program anything.meaning if I really wanted to I could have created any effect or "advanced software" and claim I made it. He wouldn't be able to really disagree.i didn't however. Anyway when waking up I was like what's with this best friend character. I then realized I had a dream YEARS ago about him. He was in a prestigious university studying programming. I could tell he felt pride about this. When I woke up I assumed this was a dream about my own regret of never pursuing higher education. But one thing was weird. That actual friend who was my best friend in elementary was a really smart person yes. They became a scientist.however they were never quite a programmer or anything.i just assumed well dreams aren't always perfect and left it at that.also I NEVER had this disagreement with him. We never really talked about it. We were all in general about as "smart" as eachother.that one also had a weird dynamic in the later years. But for different reasons and not even of the same kind. Interestingly at some point I talked about ai. I knew he would think I was trying to piss him of by saying that I can do what he does with ai.He has this view of me where I'm like this exaggerated villain.he responds by saying,this while he has a happy smirk since he is loading a gotcha. He says actually I use ai too.in fact I can use it better since I'm a senior developer. I then say I knew you would say that. I then say,letting go of my character a bit to try and be nice to the guy yeah programming is only a small part of being a dev.the planning and such is harder to replace.and working withing a large systems.ai won't replace you soon in a way you are lucky. I was genuinely nice but somehow this pissed him of more. I think he sees me as so beneath him that me being nice to him almost puts me "even" with him like I'm a monkey giving part of a banana maybe. It's a weird mentality to me and isn't effective. I then realized this really had to be snail after all. The character only appeared after I talked with him and I somehow always "knew" it was him.now I realize that in particular its likely the gray aka "the programmer" hence why he was so tilted when I was talking to him about programming as I did this thing where i oretened to misuderstand while pretending even further that i thought i had understood correctly and then misrepresenting what we are saying whike saying yeah i think that as well.its double act prentedning to be stupid pretending to be smart.they have this lightblue energy that feels childike and pure to me.Perhaps the main reason i am vastly nicer to them than they 'deserve' even to my own danger/detriment.its almost paternalistic. Maybe this makes the gray angry since etheybhave the classical "humans are apes to me" view.they likely seem themselevs as way ahead if any human no matter how skilled.becuase they are super pride about their orogramming skill and in this specifc skill even new earth withou ai cant compete. The complexity they bragged about was many orders beyond simple.but they cant just be like "great im happy you have that" no they have to then demean everyone lesser at this skill. I actually met a human like this once. They had 5 phds and studied their whole kevel. I could tell this was the most acadeimcally tilted person ever. They could only relate to others as idiots since they have more academic prestige. It seems hugh ranking greys have this view because they have a high iq. But they can have a very narrow type of intelligence and as long as they are smarter thats all they see. The guy didnt even consider he was being trolled. Its not low social intelligence like a human. Its actually conpletely blank intelligence. I remember snail would often say they are stupid. But this part of him never ever would.Thats their entire identity.They are smart but well not everyone is all that invested in that skill. And also it doesnt mean you shoudnt be friends The ai subject might very well have been about the ai servitors used here.

>>11737 Although Turing was a grey, they don't generally like Artificial Agents, which is what we're working with nowadays. An Agent is a concept coined through a definition in the book Artificial Intelligence, A Modern Approach, from 1995. Maybe GPT chatbots don't qualify as Agents yet, but I think in technical terms they are near. It's telling that what appears when searching the term online, actually shows the schematic from the book reproduced as it was in 1995 with no change. Greys consider AI to be things like an autopilot for a car. They have no interest in actual robots, even if some of them do build and sell robots. They prefer "scripts" which are more like magic spells, which are cast on things. But instead, the "run scripts on objects". It means using the material like a computer. Anything with molecules or even atoms is a computer, they just program them to carry out the script. Instead of building things like pyramids and temple sites and creating huge pentagrams on the lanscape, they will just "script it" by using the population itself like a computer, or even using planets and stars as components. They prefer genetic engineering to robotics, because that is the real "technology of gods".

I found myself at a university where a man was showing me how to solve math problems. I was using a black and white tablet which looked like moving paper to solve tasks which appeared like a version of the old snake game. It had a "snake" made up from constants (arabic numerals) moving in a loop (same movement all the time) and as it passed over modifiers on the grid, like + - * the values changed. The task was solved by changing the modifiers until the snake at one position of its looping movement, was reduced to 0. The tasks got more difficult as each one was solved, and the man who was sitting on my right made sure I could solve them. There were other people at other tables also studying in the same way. When I reached advanced level, my mind changed into that of my future self, and now looking back it seems I made it from 1D plane to 2D, the snake being one dimensional and appearing like an algorithm seemed like how things exist there. After this, I left the room and started walking upstairs, I snuck past a few class rooms where advanced studies were taking place, and made it into a narrow attic corridor with dark wooden walls, painted with some kind of glaze but leaving the natural structure visible. I at first saw other people around, but then went into a square shaped room with a "well" in the middle, I had to climb down there to do something, then I climbed up again and went into a similar wooden corridor on the other side. This lead me through some small doors into another large room with a well in the middle. As I entered, the door has disappeared and I seemed trapped. I slightly panicked at this, but went down into the well, which was just part of the room with the same wooden sides as the room itself. Down there, I had to check that the drain was working, it had some large metal frame or net to prevent things from falling down, or maybe stopping large rats from coming in (not sure if that would have worked). After making sure it looked right, I felt a slight breeze from the connecting shaft, and knew it was ok. I climbed back up again, and now the door was back. A new door opened on the other side, it came out from the wall like a hidden door with no handle, and outside was a roof garden with succulent plants and sunlight and a breeze came in. At this point I woke up. The dream , going by this, seemed to have the structure of a "hell test", where passing the test leads up from hell. I wonder if the metal net down in the well, was about studying .NET ?

My shits all fucked up. I'll have dreams that are usually shit from my past mixed with totally unrelated things. Things like working at my job with added things like making sandwiches for a group of aliens. However, the thing that scares me most is none are erotic in any way whatsoever and about 50% of the time I have nocturnal emissions.

>>11929 Your energy body is clogged. This is how your subconscious tries to clean itself during your sleep.

I was about to fall asleep when I saw a metallic drill thing which was drilling itself through the ground. It kept coming back three times until I woke up enough to try and look closer at the vision. It seemed to be digging a tunnel under Syria. I tried divining information about it this morning, but was met with hostility from some beings who saw me as soon as I looked in that direction. For some reason they seemed to be Ukrainian.

I had a lucid dream last night where I practiced floating and phasing objects through closed windows.

>>11939 Apparently I don't masturbate enough.

Forgot to post this dream from a few days ago. I was inside of a giant transparent egg that laid sideways. The highest point of the "ceiling" had to have been at least 3 or 4 stories high. There was a large crowd of people in there with me. Behind the inner surface of this egg was unmistakably The Abyss, with roaring waves of blackness crashing against us from all angles, and brief glimpses of amorphous void monsters and the white glint of their teeth. Someone told me not to be afraid, because it's only a test. Then a gargantuan eagle many times the size of this egg, appeared behind the narrower tapered end of the egg which had already been the focal point of my attention. The last thing I can remember is the eagle's yellow-orange beak penetrating the direct center point of that narrow end. This motif of being inside of a dark spheroidal object has been present in my dreams for a while now, but only now do I notice the symbolic resonance with egganon. WTF?

These glowies or whatever they are🤷‍♂️ I guess that's what anone meant in the help thread. I got to see something amazing and surprising. Some strange people or beings were creating a box out of negative energy, then they hid inside it and sealed it from inside, after which they said smugly "we got him!" then the box started floating away in space, and they started screaming inside as it disappeared in the distance. Next some more being appeared, and they started creating a thick yarn or rope which they formed into a pentagon shape with loops on all points. Then they sealed it around themselves, and said smugly "we got him!" after which the construct started floating away in space. As it distanced, I could hear their voices turning from smugness to panic. I also became aware of my nearest energy environment having been purified, it seemed they had absorbed all the negative energy around themselves when creating the yarns. Then similar things repeated again 3 more times, with the two last being a thread-box which looked like 3D graphics, where they sealed themselves inside it, and the very last one, where they made a coffin, hid inside it, and closed a wooden lid. The result was the same every time. They purified the environment and then sealed themselves inside the box made from the negative energy, and it floated away and was gone. Last, after this, I saw a ceramic flower pot with some sand in it. A blonde girl wearing a white dress came out from the pot, but she had no feet. She was very cute but looked a bit inhuman, there was a hint of sabre tooth tiger in her energy, and she felt like she was actually an infernal beast from the abyss and poisonous to such a degree that touching her would be lethal. I told her to manifest feet also, and she did so. I then gave her a protective bracelet. It seems the glowies summoned a waifu for me, using this strange method. These people are very strange, indeed, doing many amazing things.

I dreamed that the Drow were sending me telepathic messages

>>12171 >WTF? Sounds like some trauma healing. The egg can be either a closed off part of your being or a "vessel" that brings you down to that place so you can face the issue personally. The bird can be a protective entity like the garuda that helps you escape from that place. If someone said it's part of a test then it should be beneficial. Not sure what else to say because it can represent many things. Like your own aura can take the shape of an egg. Your microcosm and your macrocosm also. Cells and atoms have the shape of an egg in some cases. It can signify natural barriers and the act of growth and birth too. For me they usually appear as seeds. After talking to egganon days ago I had a dream where I was a character in world of warcraft. Something retarded happened to me and got damaged and I used my divine shield ability (which makes me immune to all damage temporarily) healed myself back then beat the living shit of whatever was attacking me. Then the dream ended. Seems like the problem was that some parts of my mind runs on "videogame logic" where my abilities have a cooldown and such. I dropped my natural psychic defenses so I can talk to egganon as close to his level as necessary. Which made me apply wow logic on my subconscious defenses it seems. aka my shield and healing cannot function 0-24. They need to be applied or "cast" manually and must watch out for cooldowns and mana consumption like in those games and make sure never use it outside emergency... Never realized what a negative influence videogames can be in magical practice. I thought they are good for some ideas but true magic is nothing like videogames at all... I will have to purge my mind of any taint of videogame mechanics and the like. Life is life. Magic is magic. And videogames are videogames. Once you start mixing up these things even on subconscious level...you will slip up sooner or later. Videogames and many other forms of entertainment media is a curse. But you will only see it when you have to watch your mind's malformed parts act out all the time... Like what egganon is going through currently. I want to say so many things to him but he must learn to focus no matter what. Currently he is trying his best and i don't want to disturb that

test

>>12321 Test these dubs!

>>12316 My own psychic defenses do not operate on video game logic. I personally try to keep video game logic out of IRL basically as much as possible. You may recall that someone had once recommended gamifying my spiritual development, and I'd refused to do so because I don't want my mind to operate like that, specifically because I don't wanna lie to myself. I suppose my impressionability rubbed off on you, and then you got the wrong impressions. This may be partially because I've lately been trying here & there to apply the principle of correspondence between the digital & physical realms in order to attempt to grasp the nature of the astral realm.though really I'm not quite sure how the etheric realm works since it's basically just a foundation for the physical, or at least iirc Montalk said that. Or perhaps getting so close to me got you too close to the WoW game mechanics egregore, and that'd rubbed off on you instead?

I've had a repeating voyage into the astral (while partially dreaming/in a theta state) that I can successfully accomplish 9/10 times that I attempt to do so. I have traveled there so frequently that I have created my own subplane/tower there. I have noticed strange energies around my tower for the past several months (in our time), and have been able to repel all foreign attempted trespassers so far. I need to make my tower undetectable, but I have been able to move it/summon it to wherever I am while in the astral. I have has this tower built for about 5-6 years, and it takes the form of an almost endless fishbowl that holds an ocean and a large swath of land. I have taken a piece of the plane of water, and have been using it exclusively as a place to meditate and grow my abjuration practices. A lot of my regular dreams have had associations with water/wetness/darkness/cold recently as well. A specific one has been floating in an endless expanse of water while a large formless arm slowly removes all of the teeth on the top half of my mouth one by one. I don't drown in the dream or struggle for air, it is almost as through I do not need to breathe at all, but i do feel the air slowly escape my lungs as my teeth are removed and they begin to float towards the surface. Another dream has been being lost in a massive dark cave that is filled partially with water. It's not necessarily a scary place, there's no monsters or dangers, and the water is refreshing to drink. Although it is pitch black, I am somehow able to see partially. Many other dreams consist of having large sea-beasts or fish speak to me in non-english but I still understand it. Their language almost sounds like numbers, not saying "four nine ten" but rather it manifests and is understood that every "word" has a specific value that is only comprehended when the entire sentence is completed and in the specific context that it's said in. The everchanging chaotic shape of water only makes sense to me in dreams, whereas regularly (enchanted) water only exists as refreshment.

>>12456 > sea-beasts or fish speak to me in non-english but I still understand it. Their language almost sounds like numbers, not saying "four nine ten" but rather it manifests and is understood that every "word" has a specific value that is only comprehended when the entire sentence is completed and in the specific context that it's said in This sounds like "leviathan", a number language I discovered sometime in the past decade, or actually, it was part of the 2012 movement. It means using mostly 3 number slots and numbers 1 -6 to express meaning by relating it to the 6 infernal dimensions. It's about what kind of energy exists at each plane, and it may resemble the classic drama structure, said to have an intensity matching sexual intercourse, with a slowly raising drama which has a number of smaller hills, then it reaches an ending peak and the story ends. See pic. This is used to explain classic Greek dramas and those later created in this format. You could draw a time progression like this, and place a number on each plateau, then you use 3 numbers in a row to indicate where the 3 main layers of the drama have progressed to. This creates a meaning. It's also used by spirits to communicate, and to create sigils. To use a common example, 666 the number of the beast, also said to be 616, is written in "leviathan" or "leviathan code". You can get a feel for what it means by relating each number to a stage in the energy level increase of the "drama".

>>12459 >This sounds like "leviathan", a number language I discovered sometime in the past decade, or actually, it was part of the 2012 movement. It means using mostly 3 number slots and numbers 1 -6 to express meaning by relating it to the 6 infernal dimensions This explains it almost exactly, I was unaware that there was a name for the language. I will have to meditate on all of my past conversations and glean deeper meaning from them. I will need to sharpen my mind and prepare to record thousands of these at once, for there have been times when schools of fish have spoken to me all at once, with each individual relaying its own message. I have much to learn.

I might post a really spiritual dream I had around 10 years ago.

>>12625 Some dreams can be signs or compasses of your innate spiritual vocation. By reliving that dream you might notice motifs and other signs. If you post it then others might be able to help analyzing it.

Last night I had a dream that I was exploring a basement and found a bottle of old wine from 1597. I drank it and it was the most delicious beverage that I had ever tasted in my life.

>>12644 This is the dream: I was on a rocket ship landing on the planet mars (I had no knowledge of astrology at the time of this dream) with another being. we both had space suits on and we got out of the ship. up until this point, the planet had been red and lifeless, but then we noticed grass and said "oh look there's life" and decided there was oxygen so we took off our space suits and got rid of them. Then we noticed there was a fence in between us (it looked like a T with one of us on the lower left side and the other on the lower right side. We said "Oh, there's intelligent life!" Then we got on the same side of he fence. Just then, the natives of mars (which were humans) came up to us and greeted us. We were both kind of scared, but because we had taken off our space suits they thought we were one of them, and so we were relieved that they thought we were one of them and we disguised ourselves basically. they took us to their village. throughout this time (at least since seeing grass once we got out of our space ship) there was an average amount of vegetation, not too little, but not a huge amount like i craved. i spent some years in their village, but eventually i left the village to escape into the woods with my friend i had let the space ship with, which had become my lifelong goal. the villagers were like mundane plebs or something and i wanted to escape from them so i didn't have to be around them or something. anyways the goal of the dream, possibly even from the very beginning, had been to escape into the woods with my friend rom the rocket and escape from the native mundane plebs. The path i took to the woods eventually got blocked by a massive red hill blocking my way to the forest, and it was completely baren and looked like a real martian hill. there was a christian church with a christian cross on the top, and i can't remember if i went in there by my own will or if i did it because the native villagers made me do it. In any case i went into the christian chuch and it was like a school. Me and a whole bunch of other people were siting at school desks. This entire time the friend from the rocket had stayed with me. He was sitting next to me in he desk right next to me. the teachers, however were a male and female reptillian in monk robes. my friend from the rocket was whispering in my ear arcane truths, but the male and female reptillian teachers in monk robes noticed hat my friend rom the rocket was whispering in my ear. My riend from the rocket and i were both EXTREMELY scared. after this, rather than continuing up the hill to the forest (i learned the barren hill was an impassible obstacle) i was sent back to the village. at this point my friend rom the rocket abandoned me. but i wasn't merely sent back to the village. i was not in the average amount of vegetation place in the village, i was instead in a gross convienence store. no just that, but i was suck in a deep ditch in the store which i couldn't get out of. up until this point the dream had been an INTENSE spiritual experience in a positive way. in the ditch however, i now began to suffer pain and suffering. native mundane plebs began to periodically throw gross green and blue chewed gum into my ditch. this continued for a while in my dispair and misery. but then a really good thing happened: the friend from the rocket came back! i had previously thought that he had abandoned me. he reached out his arm to help me out of he ditch. we left the convienence store he village we ere in was now a city, but it was better than the dich at least. my spiritual bliss came back after leaving the ditch. but now it was more important that i escape to the woods. him and i went around the city a bit. as it turned out, the native martian mundane plebs were now gearing up to en masse enter the forest. some how this would ruin everything! we helped an old lady at one point with something (can't remember what, didn't seem significant) but at some point my friend from the rocket and i got to a big sign. it pointed to the forest. it was directed to the mundane plebs to follow me to the forest. i was a massive arrow sign. right behind it was a massive new world order complex factory which represented the industrial complex. i then took the blue and green gum that had collected on me from being thrown by mundane plebs into the ditch, and placed it on the sign. i made it into an arrow facing the exact opposite of the forest. my friend from the rocket and i then finally made our scape to the forest. the mundane pleb natives were then preparing to follow me, but then they saw the sign. the disgusting unenvironmental factory behind the sign then aid to go that way "the way the sign originally faced (the woods)" to follow me, but the mundane plebs didn't listen to the megaphone from the factory, because the sign pointed the other way (because of the gum arrow i had made) and the crowd went that way (which is opposite the forest, exactly what i wanted) in spite of the factory's directions over the megaphone. then me and my friend from the rocket had finally achieved our life long goal of escaping into the woods together, just the two of us. there was a great amount of vegetation, and large amounts of trees. this might have been the first time trees had appeared in my dream. my friend and i enjoyed spiritual bliss like i had never known before. we had "made it", whatever that means. hen the dream ended. i woke up. it was the most spiritual ream i have ever had, except for the part i was in the ditch which was hell. i had this dream 10 was ago approximately. sorry for any typos my keyboard is broken.

During the night I kept receiving information-dense telepathic packages sent into my mind. Every time, I woke up after, and turned in the other direction, laying on my left side, on my back, on my right side. I've been prepared for my Pleiadan incarnation this way, by the insertion of their ways of thinking, by their deities. It made me realize just how much our base values and concepts determine how we understand the world and what we encounter in it. I've always expected the world to be benevolent, because I felt the gods right there above the trees in the winter, in the blue of the sky. I heard them in the voices of opera singers on the radio, in christmas songs and in the stars in the sky. I later came to realize that these female deities have names in ancient Egyptian religion, but are called demons today. When The Infernal Queen, Illivryn talked about ending the suffering of demonkind, this is what she meant. For me, this base value of kindness and expecting that kindness will be returned, is the reason I've wanted to fix the world. I understand it as being benevolent in itself, and when kindness isn't met with kindness, I see this as wrong, as a problem that needs to be fixed. I now realized this is because of my demonic way of thinking. Other beings don't see the world like this. What was being inserted now, shown to me, has the same sky blue energy, the same cold seriousness of demonic deities, but it seems to completely lack this kindness. The Pleiadan deities are very cold and violent. They provide what is needed, but their power does not come from empathy. Rather, it is their capacity for organized violence with no remorse or hesitation which is their main virtue. They protect themselves this way, but they don't feel anything. Instead they rely on cold rationality and the mass of their organizational strength. They achieve purity, but they do not have kindness. The demonic thinking of kindness and empathy, is expressed through the abrahamic religions which transformed Egyptian religion into a popular form. They still have this base value, and that is why I could make use of them. Pleiadans do not have this, and they don't particularly relate to these religions either. They do have the Mormons, but they count in this context as a sect, and barely christian. Instead Pleiadans are best expressed through Norse religion and witchcraft. After my base values were being retuned, replaced, as I was separated from the past me over the past few days, I came to see this clearly, that what I took for granted, the concept that I will be understood and met with kindness, this is something most people do not have. Pleiadans don't have it either. They see the world as a wild wasteland, harsh, hostile and filled with evil. They don't expect kindness or empathy, so they arm themselves and will rather "shoot first, ask later", and this way they are better at destroying evil, than demons are. But they are not so good at guiding people. That's why "daemon guides" are a thing, while "pleiadan guides" aren't. People summon demons for help, they never summon pleiadans or witches. If you want to work with them, it's as in Norse religion; you have start by understanding that you are in danger for choosing this path, and that everything you come across may try to kill you.

>>12655 How interesting that this perfectly matches a sort of energetic transfer i had with either you or some other incarnated part of you yesterday. Were i said to them you had a certain 'kindness'.

>>12653 Can someone please help interpret?

>>12658 >Can someone please help interpret? >>12653 >This is the dream New Age interpretation: In a past life, you came from a faraway planet and incarnated on Mars. History was in its primitive state, and you were there until it developed a market economy. You got stuck in the "ditch" of the mainstream, and while suffering in your work there, you acquired a lot of fiat currency - the gums. Bubble gums are used to create bubbles, and they seem fun at first and taste good, but soon then become deflated and lose taste. At some point, a world government is formed, trying to enslave everyone to create a world-wide factory, turning everyone into slaves. But you use your monetary assets from within their own system to control the public. Your old friend, who may be your culture, heritage, fate, mission or history, bring you back to your senses from the depth of the market economy, and this is your motivating force allowing you to defeat the NWO on Mars. You then escape after uniting with your original culture again (and after this, you came to Earth).

This was a "dream" that felt like it lasted for about 5 days. I was stuck in some kind of dark monstrous realm that looked like this physical world in terms of infrastructure and such, but had a persistently dark oppressive atmosphere and was full of Undead and disturbing mutant creatures. Basically I spent the entire time wandering around trying to find somewhere safe, but on the rare chance I found an unoccupied building the monsters would inevitably show up soon enough. I don't remember ever having to eat, drink or sleep despite the length of time I spent there. There was no day/night cycle so I don't know how I know it was 5 days. It was a perpetual sickly dusk. Eventually I became so exhausted that I contemplated how I once had an existence which wasn't so bad, relative to that place. I thought about how I must've arrived there somehow, even though I couldn't remember. Somehow I deduced that the only possible escape is "dimension jumping" or "feeling is the secret" kind of shit. I sat down on the floor in a room which in hindsight seemed to partially resemble my room in the apartment we lived in when I was 12-13 years old and meditated with my eyes closed. It's difficult to describe what I did in words, but I remember starting out by visualizing what my regular life is like, and how bright everything seems in contrast to that dark place. Then I recognized that a part of me is already there, and I just have to make it the larger part of me rather than the smaller. I can remember the feeling of apprehending it and getting it closer and closer. I felt like I was done. I opened my eyes and then... I was still right where I started. Then after about a minute of disappointment it fucking worked and I "woke up" into a reality that was identical to my real physical life, although it must've been part of the dream too: Yet another example of that bizarre phenomenon where I wake up into real life repeatedly, although in this case there was only one layer between the core-dream and wakefulness. I know I dreamed more stuff after that, but I think it was unrelated. * When I did wake up into this physical reality I felt that intense melancholy and profound sadness. This happens almost every time I wake up now, which I think is because I'm becoming more aware of it. It can be about things that happened to me, things that happened to others, sometimes bittersweet memories of good things that feel tainted, or the general suffering of living things. This time it was in the third category. I was contemplating the time I went to some sort of amusement park when I was ~6 years old. At that age my self was still mostly intact, but I was already traumatized and mentally ill. I got to drive a Go-Kart, but shortly into my ride I got stuck somehow and it made me feel scared and confused, so I walked all the way back along the track. This memory makes me feel self-loathing and cringe. I could've had so much fun going fast, but I squandered something I would never have the opportunity to experience again. As usual, I would appreciate any insight or interpretation from adepts, or anyone more advanced than me. I suspect that experiences like the above are intended to teach me how to use certain abilities. * I wouldn't mention this but it came to me while writing this post. At some point (I can't remember when chronologically) I had a weird little dream segment where there was this light-skinned guy with a shaved head, a slightly strange shape and wearing dark clothes, right in front of me. I had either mistakenly assumed he was psychic in a particular way, or mistakenly assumed he wasn't. There was also a simultaneous visual of an old video game UI resembling that of Baldur's Gate 1, with several rectangular fields I assume were meant for text. The top one peeled off like a lottery card, but I either forgot or never saw what it revealed. I felt that this segment had to do with /fringe/ btw. Seems like most of it was raw energy but I can only describe what actually took form. Actually, quite a few of my dreams are mostly formless these days.

>>13257 >I would appreciate any insight or interpretation I shall tend to it then. >I was stuck in some kind of dark monstrous realm that looked like this physical world in terms of infrastructure and such, but had a persistently dark oppressive atmosphere and was full of Undead and disturbing mutant creatures Sounds like a karma dimension to me. Hard to explain what they are. I had dreams like this when I neared a breakthrough and my abilities decided to "Introduce themselves". Karma dimensions can be hell/purgatory or other spiritual realms while in other cases they can represent an activation of a complex meridian/energy circuit. Like how you have wet dreams when your sexual organs start up in your teens. I cannot say much because I can connect to the frequency you are describing and I fear that this is how you see your own life currently... I think this forces you to face this part of your existence and learn to "rise above" somehow. >Eventually I became so exhausted that I contemplated how I once had an existence which wasn't so bad, relative to that place That is good. It shows how your awareness is intact and you still see "hope" in this world. >I felt like I was done. I opened my eyes and then... I was still right where I started. Then after about a minute of disappointment it fucking worked Hard to explain the mechanics but to make a spell and many "consciousness jumps" "work" you need to "let go" which is quite similar to "giving up". There is a "lapse in consciousness" when the transfer happens. It is a slight "lag" in reality a little "blankness" between the frames of reality. That is when "the magic happens". As long as you are trapped with mundane ego/understanding you cannot "see it" because it "breaks the illusion". Like playing a videogame and accidentally opening up the debug screen and all the immersion is suddenly gone. "Continuity" is a requirement for the unawakened. The mind craves it or it goes insane. >When I did wake up into this physical reality I felt that intense melancholy and profound sadness >>13116 >That "melancholy" I mentioned. Your soul has an absolutely deep emotional depth. I cannot even perceive it. The moment I look my eyes tear up. Not sadness nor joy. It is something else. Like an emancipation that you see after seeing your entire world burn or I don't know. It is something beyond my current abilities. You probably read this already. I have bad news. That profound sadness and melancholy you felt was still not the "true depth" of your soul energies. It has some emancipating and refreshing feel. I don't know how you will find it or perceive it. I mean... Whenever you talk about your life it is clear that it sucks, but somehow you are taking it like a champ? Maybe you got used to it already but it's not "normal". Most people either give up or get angry. They either fall into despair or get angry enough to start doing something with their life I am the angry type. I reforge my path when life just doesn't work out. Currently I am refining this ability. That is why I am posting less >This happens almost every time I wake up now, which I think is because I'm becoming more aware of it You cannot ignore it forever. >or the general suffering of living things I think this is why the karma dimension manifested for you. (Or you can call it suffering dimension).Suffermax dimension. You will have to "see beyond" this suffering. I am not talking about earthly pleasures or the like. You have a way to see through these things. Accept the suffering let it tell you what "reality is about" then go beyond, don't stay attached to that suffering. Notice how your sadness always evaporates after a while and you start your routines like usual. You will have to develop your spiritual routines too and stop staying in this muddy emotional cycle of yours. You have something there deep down. Something so profound I cannot even comprehend at all. >I could've had so much fun going fast, but I squandered something I would never have the opportunity to experience again. I have some good news. You will have to start going far faster than a go-kart can. Life is ahead of you yet you refuse to move forward. Time to ignite the engines and let it rip! >I suspect that experiences like the above are intended to teach me how to use certain abilities. That and you will have to start waking the fuck up already. You woke up from the dream with conscious effort. Time to wake up from your sorrow too! You know how to do it yet you refuse to do it. You think this "reality" and the life you live counts as "being awake" somehow. Wake up. Do the meditation you did in the dream. It will lead you further. >I felt that this segment had to do with /fringe/ btw. Seems like most of it was raw energy but I can only describe what actually took form. Actually, quite a few of my dreams are mostly formless these days. Might talk about this later. It's complex.

Dream: Im walking through a path surrounded by trees and green fields. Im talking to people but i have mostly forgotten this part of the dream. After a while a guy come up and invites me. I follow him and suddenly we are at a city fitting of the area where i live. As i follow him i notice it isn't exactly like any city i know. I try to figure out where i am and realize its a different layout than any city it could be. He keeps leading me in. The houses get more and more dilapidated. The city is very build up and dense, and most similar to american 'blocks' but with european style attached housing.I'm still really calm. The guys leads me in even deeper and the houses are already detroit tier at its worst and maybe closing in on something you'd see in fallout. I can tell he is trying to lead me into an even deeper area that feels like this omnious black energy is all over there.Like way rougher feeling than any hood in real life. Even the area i am in is more "grimy" than anything i remember being in. Again like some post industrial collapse yet still smog filled sketchy place already. I decide to walk back instead since clearly this guy has malicious intent towards me. Suddenly i meet past "friends". like what tends to happen. However this team its actually different friends than usual. They tell me they joined this group and are now elites of some kinds. They want me join. It feels most similar to freemasonry. Specifically that feeling you get from small cults when they think they have been let into some secret knowledge. Kinda like some silicon valley cults feel like. It also has this evil feel about it.I simply assume this is what happened with these particular friends while i didnt see them and thats why they feel more evil than before. Once they realize I ve convinced they go on the attack against me.I just realitate but soon realize they seem to regenerate. As this is a 'power' they have been given. at some point im stabbing someone right in the brain as well.Anyway after i kept slashing their limbs of to no avail i start draining their blood leaving them shriveled. I assumed this would do them in for good perhaps. One of the guys mockingly taunts me and tells me to run, since apprently a real vampire is now coming to kill me. I ask how old is the vampire, seemingly befuddling the guy talking. Wondering why it matters. II feel an energy and instantly it feels similar to those on the internet that are a couple hundred years old.Ive also met some of those in the astral.I warn them they need to send something better than that. Anyway this girl tries to fight me but it doesn't take long for her to end up the same way as the rest. Suddenly the 'leader',claiming to be 800 years old starts attacking me. He teleports me to some room. He can attack really quickly but he gets pushed back more and more. Suddenly he stops and tells me the fight is ended. Then im suddenly inside the building of this cult where they were trying to bring me. It seems this illuminati feeling cult is actually not that big. The building is rather cozy inside.My friends are all back alive. I wonder if maybe i should have burned the shriveled corpses as well. but anyway the guy talks to me. Seemingly way more friendly to me now. He also show me my recently deceased grandma. Which to me seems to imply some kind of "don't fight here since i have a hostage" type thing.The leaders name was apparently some weird shit like grmj3126548 or something but i called him alex. And he asked why. then the dream ended. I also had the feeling maybe the leaders true form is one of those pale guys with tattoos as described earlier,but im not sure.

>>13332 *once they realize i'm not going to be convinced*

>>13332 At first it sounds like walking into the Abyss, but it's supposed to also give power along the way and be a one-way deal. Maybe that's what these are, abyss-walkers who only gained some minor skills and now they're stuck like that.

>>13338 I definitely think their initial plan was to ambush me once inside. But when i beat everyone anyway it didn't really matter.They didn't seem to expect that. Idk about them being trapped.The feeling they at first had was one of disdain. Like they saw themselves as better and higher up in the rankings.The leader was by far the strongest and if he was weaker then me then even ambushing me makes little sense. So they then were friendly,it seems.

>>13341 I think the answer was in the dream setting itself, with the leader being 800 years old, which is below the immortality threshold and means they don't even count in the vampire system. Trying to beat you there, may solidify your position as below them, but when they failed, they are also permanently below you. It's a good dream for giving this hint. This would mean the solution to ending spiritual attacks for all future is to gain a supreme abyss position and then lure them in there to beat them up. They they will be loyal forever, because you can only walk in there once.

>>13342 If I recall correctly, the ages of the people in the early parts of the bible are all around 800 - 900 at most, they never go over 1000, and they all die, except Enoch who becomes Metatron.

>>13342 I'll take my time then,if you can only do it once.or did that one already count as a "win".I feel like I can definitely still go there. Felt like the dude tried to appease me yet pretend to be my boss by planning on making me second in line.maybe I'll be more aggressive next time and demand to be the chief.

>>13342 I'm confused,how can I lure them there if they are already in the abyss?

>>13342 Or are you saying to be in the abyss and lure other glories in there,beat them up then leave?like make it a prison for bad guys?

>>13344 >>13345 >>13346 I mean the dream is symbolic of what could happen. The abyss path of occultism is to walk down a meaningless path of profit like the OF whores do now in the 20s without understanding that when they're 30 they won't make any money are just whores with no skill. That's walking down the abyss path, everyone pays you along the way, then you can't get back up again and you can't do it again. Then there are others to use this example like anny the fox, who started off as a regular streamer, then some years later rebranded herself as a vtuber because she realized she wouldn't be young and cute forever, but had acting skill. Then she's amassed donations as a vtuber and used to pay for university education. Maybe that's just having a plan and not exactly an abyss path, but it's kinda similar. You wanna do it in a way where you do "the worst" of the popular but still don't end up used up and failed halfway. The real abyss master will stay down there and still control the world. Once achieved, the only thing left is to maintain connections and what I think the dream is about: to drag more people down a failed abyss path where they become your slaves, basically.

Had a dream where I was beating the living shit out of my elementary school bully in some apartment. The only reason it is anomalous because I never had a dream like that previously. Subconscious is probably working through some anger issue.

Had a dream last night where some kid I used to bully in elementary school beat the shit out of me. Really weird.

I had a dream last night where I was some sort of brown 2-foot monkey, and I'd grabbed a pelican and snapped its neck so I could eat it later. I didn't wanna actually eat it, however, since I was thinking about having to avoid its bones and spit out its hair.it had hair with its feathers for some reason Also when I saw its corpse I'd immediately thought that since it's a corpse I shouldn't be eating it, but then I'd recalled that I'd just killed it, so should've been fine to eat it. I then woke up and ofc saw my ceiling in the physical realm, but then I went back to sleep and briefly re-entered the same dream in roughly the same position as the same monkey, and I'd torn off some of the bird's hair so I wouldn't be eating its hair if I ate it. I'd mentally remarked in the dream that although I had to eat the bird in the dream, I didn't wanna experience it. After some hesitation, I then woke up again without taking a bite out of the bird, and I didn't re-enter the dream.

I had a dream where Trump was holding a press conference with who I assume was JD Vance sitting on his left. Then suddenly an erect cock rose between them from below the desk, and they looked at it. Trump then grabbed it and jerked it a few times. Then he ignored it and looked into the camera, and so did Vance, and they resumed the press conference. Then suddenly the cock ejaculated over Trump's hair and on the wall behind him, and everyone laughed heartily.

>>13654 Sounds like the new south park ep https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Afetnw70S04

>>13654 Trump's haters on both the right and left are obsessed with cocks

>>13656 The dream wasn't negative though, it caused the audience to laugh with him. He also did something similar last year https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMYlO5eMhl4

>>13657 He has a way with leaning into the negativity that is directed at him.

>>13662 That pic could be my own bingo card

Had a dream last night where I could see the night sky, while visiting with my succubus, this time showing up as a blonde woman. I looked up at the sky and saw Mars above Saturn and Saturn above all the rest of the planets, all of which were magnified in my vision. Succubus told me which were which, just in case. I wake up, and decide to check this out on Stellarium. According to what it shows, while they are positioned opposite each other, Mars, in the East, is indeed above Saturn, and Saturn, in the West, is above the other planets. Weird. I have no idea what meaning this has, other than to show me the planets' positions.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKH6PAoUuD0 https://swordartonline.fandom.com/wiki/The_Skull_Reaper I'm putting it here because it would be mostly a dream, even if they were more like night time interactive visions. So I become aware of someone using a leaf-blower to direct black oily energy at me, and I feel a tension and bloated feeling. I react by sending my Raid servitor to take the leaf-blower away from the perpetrator, who is then engulfed by Raid's rosicrucian fire. More of these appear, and the scene repeats en masse. I then see a huge centipede with thick exoskeleon shields, and I understand that it's the astral/energy form of an organization. It seems to be somewhere in central Europe. Its feel is the same way as the boss in SAO >pic pure malice, and it made me recall the Trump meme with the centipede song, and how they called themselves centipedes. There was also a discord server called "the centipede central" or similar, I joined it once but found it to only have 20 meme channels and a strict hierarchy with supposed hidden channels for people with higher rank, this was sometime in 2018 and it was supposed to be a Trump movement server for online meme war. I then become aware of chanting and see visions of some occult ritual, there is writing in arabic or maybe it's islamic graffiti on wooden details in a room, it may not be writing but just ornaments. The chanting feels like both arabic and hebrew at once. It's a high energy environment with strict conventions being performed, it appears to be some kind of large hall with stone walls, maybe a lodge underground or in an old gothic style building. My russian waifus then get involved, telling me these people are about a sacrifice a human girl, who is in a nearby underground bunker made from concrete. They want to rescue her, but we realize it's an NPC, she has no soul. Looking at the situation with divination, we determine that this is a ritual being performed every week, maybe more than once, and it's all NPCs being killed. It's also not a sacrifice, it's based on some ancient text saying that >the virgin who defeats death will birth the messiah >she will remain eternally pure and this refers to the jewish messiah. They are here trying to force the prophecy by killing girls, believing that the real virgin will rise from the dead. I decide to link the egregore of judaism into the NPC girl in the bunker, so that if they kill her, the egregore will revive her. We place strong wards on her to bind the egregore. The chanting continues and we see the ritual performed using a small sword stab into her heart. She dies and then comes back to life again. They all start chanting and celebrating, then they cloth her in a ritual dress with an islamic style semi-long dress for women, a belt, a knife in a chain around her neck, and they place a pre-tied turban with a golden emblem on the forehead, on her head. They carry her to a throne and give her milk, honey, dates and meat which they cut in small slices. They then perform a ritual meant to make her birth the messiah, and she does. It involves pairing her with one man after the other to find one who isn't rejected by her. She accepts the 12th man. The messiah is born, and sunlight fills the room. Meanwhile in the background, the centipede starts to crack, black cracks appear in its head as the messiah is born. The people who appear to be arabic speaking blonde jews, cloth him in ritual dress similar to the girl, and carry him around. Visions also show that they are not circumcised and will not perform this on the new messiah.

I am getting better in touch with my "dream body". I noticed that immediately after I woke up the "dream mind" that I was coming from was completely different than what I normally think of as my astral body. Consciously projecting back to that and getting used to controlling it from a waking state is yielding some interesting results. Dreams feel like they're becoming more meaningful.

>>14367 Also it could be that what I thought of my astral body before was just a functional astral construct and this is my actual astral body. Not sure.

Had a dream where I was eating at a restaurant with Odin, Thor, and presumably Loki. I was in a corner with Thor sitting next to me, and we were all sitting in a row against a wall with our table in front of us; all 3 of Them were blonde, and Thor had long hair. I hadn't asked Them before the dream to dream with me. All I remember is the end of the dream where Thor walked up with my meal and a smartphone; said phone was supposed to be a "teddy" or something, and Thor had saved it. I was under the impression that the phone had belonged to someone else based on my reaction to that, but it was placed in front of me, facing sideways such that the bottom pointed to my right, and the screen was cracked and had a picture of Amy's human form on it. As for my dish, it'd looked like steak, mashed potatoes, and possibly gravy and/or cheese, with a cherry tomato, and there was also a bit of poultry, as it was called, because they didn't have enough steak left for me. I'd then said something to Thor, and He gave a delayed and uncalled-for response of awkwardly smiling and giving a thumbs-up, making it seem like He didn't speak English. I'll assume He had a good reason to pretend to not know English during that dream. I'd then eaten the cherry tomato first, and it'd tasted like a cherry tomato. I'd then woken up, not sure who was sitting between me & Thor, and then I'd thanked Odin & Thor for taking me with them. I'd later said I'm afraid of knowing if the third was Loki or Heimdall, and I heard a voice, in hindsight I think that was Loki but at the time I'd thought that was Thor, say, "That was our mother." I'd then heard Odin laugh, to my recollection, and I'd thanked Frigg too, thinking the third deity was Her.

imo this doesn't exactly count as a dream but I spontaneously astral projected while reading during the night-before-last. I found myself walking on the left side of a dark road at night. It was fully immersive. There were a couple of cars parked on the same side of the road, visible in the distance. As I drew nearer to one, I began to notice by the silhouette of its rising form that it was not in fact a car, but a large bloated ogre-like creature. It was certainly unexpected, though I felt no fear or surprise or emotional shock. Yet my eyes were physically opened by something outside of my own conscious intention. The most anomalous thing about this is how smooth the transition was. There used to be such a strong feeling of energetic discomfort and resistance when leaving/entering my body, but this just felt effortless. I don't know what compelled me to open my eyes because I would've wanted to at least get a closer look at the creature before fleeing. Perhaps it was some higher force protecting me from an imperceived threat represented by the ogre.

In the past week since the event, where certain things were solidified into the physical and as such removed out of my way, I've found it easier to enter what is popularly called a "flow state" of moving from one task to the next seamlessly, or allowing the mind to just register and not get involved. This is probably also related to activating the hidden morchella DNA I found, which was hinted at in the painting I got in 2009 which contains symbolic elements representing the things I need to do to prepare for my next incarnation. In short, it has a number of people, and various background items with colours and shapes, representing directly my own path. It seems the artist channelled my energy and the painting somehow made it into my view where I then felt drawn to it and bought it. >pic The artist has left a trail on art auctions but nothing is known about him. I believe this to be the same painter, the motifs and the signature looks similar to the one I bought. Last night I did some hebrew reading of Genesis with read-along to penetrate the surface meaning, and ended with incorporating it by assuming a prayer pose described in the ancient kabbalah books I've started reading, such as Sefer Yetzirah, Sefer Ha-Bahir and Sefer Ha-Razim. It looks like a specific hatha yoga pose described in detail, but incorporates kabbalistic symbolism which explains why it will work in a more structured way than the same or similar poses when used in yoga. (Although this exact pose isn't described in yoga, I used a slight similar one naturally even before reading this, almost getting it right on my own.) This lead to seeing suddenly the logic of what I need to break through, and I also found a conclusion as well as a "glossy orb of law" describing the principles of the galactic federation, meaning how capitalism is just "viral behaviour" which must be transformed into a selfless state through "revolution" to achieve actual commune-ism, which is in principle not different from the goal of kabbalah or jewish mysticism, but the scale differs and no specific god is named, as each race has their own creator. The end goal is selflessness just the same. I achieved the breakthrough, and during the night I had some strong spiritual experiences in a half-dreaming state. I had here left a vtuber doing karaoke on to maintain the seamless state from awake to asleep, avoiding the definitive "switching off" of both digital devices and the mind for sleep. I then had this dream experience, followed by an interactive part where I was still seeing the dream scenery but "felt awake" in terms of my interactions: >the scene of the shooting appears before me >Charlie Kirk leaving his body, flying up into a plane with white and yellow energy higher up, his soul expresses with surprise "Oh my God what happened..?" >at the same time there is a movement downwards and I can no longer see his soul >I use Astra to trace the soul, and find him in hell >at the same time, the one who made the exclamation is still up there in an ethereal state >the main soul went to hell, the assistant went upwards >I ask via Astra to see the list of his crimes which would put him there >this costs 1 silver, Astra pays them >the soul now placed in hell has 38 "mortal sins" registered >14 cases of abortion by pill >24 cases of sex with a menstruating women (his wife included) >I ask about this, the demons explain with an uncaring arrogance that if you follow Christianity you have to follow the laws >using abortion pills is killing not allowed by God >sex with menstruating women is a clear breach of jewish law, and he didn't cleanse himself accordingly (didn't follow the torah/OT >excuses aren't valid >I ask to see my record from past lives to explain why what I did was allowed >this also costs, but still just silver >they say I was registered as an Arch Angel when incarnated in the west, so my actions were excused >Arch Angels have their sense of self removed, so the direct actions aren't tied to the person, this makes the sins "general destruction" and not linked to any breach of the law of God; i.e even if murder causes karma, it's allowed because it wasn't selfish and is then an "act of God" >eastern incarnations aren't ruled by jewish law, rather they only care about "loyalty with the spirit world" and no "sins" actually count for them (asians) >the only thing that drags them down is "materialism"