Take a capsule based probiotic for a couple months and keep a vaguely hygenic kitchen anon. Throw out the curried kebabs. The worst you'll get then is timmy tortuga trying to skydive. But he is too firm to shit your pants everywhere.

>>534511 I didn't say I wanted to stop, cuh

>>534608 Cat food isn't cheap if you're staying-with-parents tier

>>534486 It's happened maybe 3 times in my adult life so far. Just recently I shit myself in bed. Not much but enough to stain my boxers...which also stained the end of my bed. It's quite shitty!

I suppose it depends on how far it has to go to be considered "poop your pants." A fart that's a little too wet? Probably once every six months. What feels like a fart, but isn't? I'm usually extremely good at clenching before it becomes a problem. It has only ever been a "I need a change of clothes" situation exactly once in my entire life, and I could have probably rode it out if I wasn't picky about the spot it made. Actually shitting my pants by the truest definition of the term? Once, when I was in the hospital for pneumonia. They had me on some pretty strong antibiotics that gave me the runs and there was basically nothing I could do about it. I said I'm good at clenching before anything makes it all the way out, but there was no stopping this false fart.

I wouldn't call a wet fart shitting my pants. I probably wet fart at about the same rate as you, i don't recall ever shitting my pants. I did once step into a nature trail to shit in the woods, but only because i didn't want to buy something at a fast food place after using their toilet.

>>534486 I don't poop.

Once a year or two. Usually accompanying sickness or food poisoning. Only shat myself proper once outside of being sick, and at least I was home at the time so nobody besides my Dad saw me having a mental breakdown over it before finally realizing "shit happens" thanks to Dad helping me through that and joking about it, letting me get over it. It sucked, but at least I can have a laugh about it now, years later.

i'm 44 and have internal hemorrhoids from spending so much time sitting at the computer when i have to go it comes on quick and i have to get to the toilet right away and i end up shitting myself nearly every week

>>534486 I have never once pulled down my pants and seen solid poop. Some kid marks sometimes, but never solid poop. Nor liquid poop. You are a disgusting, rancid human OP.

>bullshit answers like "never in my adult life." In that case, a bullshit answer you shall get out of me.

>>537259 If you're trying to tell me you don't kinda slow-mo plop a dollop of diarrhea into your underwear once every 1-2 years, you underestimate me.

>>534486 I don't recall accidentally pooping while wearing pants. I sometimes go too far with a fart and get concerned that I have (about one time each year), but I haven't actually done so.

Only once, but it wasn't shit. I had just fucked myself to the moon with a massive dildo the night before, so I had about 180+ml of high grade industrial lube still inside of me. It was cold out that day. I was walking up to Walmart and felt the need to fart (there was a lot of gas still trapped up there too), so I figured I should do it while I was still outside. Ended up shotgunning about a fistful of hot lube into my pants, which weren't dark colored - so it immediately spread everywhere, stained the back of my pants, and started to leak down my legs. By the time I hobbled back to the car, it was ice cold lube.

>>537401 Hahaha I know those ass lube farts